Call center, the Circle House, and an update on Socks...
I am yet again being held out of the call center. They're having "technological issues," so we haven't had work since last FRIDAY. I got another phone call this afternoon saying they're closed for the rest of the week. I am so, so done with this contract. I spoke with my temp agency representative and said that I was considering my contract done as of the 25th, and would be conducting myself thusly. That's if I can even go back.
Though I am WAY irritated with not being able to work and not bringing in the little income, I have also lined up two in-home clients that are planning to continue with me. So once this contract is over, I'll work my full-time job, then see private clients and the in-home clients on the weekends. It might be an additional 10 hours of work, maybe. But it could be a couple little checks that can continue to bring us back into the black.
I have been taking advantage of the time at home. It's been nice to relax with Fidget, but it's also been phenomenonal to take on some home tasks that have fallen by the wayside due to this hectic schedule. I finally conquered my clothing on Tuesday and felt SO PROUD of myself. I've hung pictures and organized and thrown away so many things. I and three of my grad school friends had planned for a potluck tomorrow. One of the women has never been to our house. I like to think I'm taking advantage of this opportunity to clean, but I also think it's been a long time coming. While Fidget and I frequently try to throw parties in a last ditch effort to clean, we end up with boxes upstairs that I'll "sort through later" and honestly never get to. Instead, by working through things legitimately, it's naturally throwing away things to make the house more functional.
I've said to Fidget many times that I wish we were cleaner, but I think we just aren't. However, with doing this effort now, maybe it'll be maintainable once we know what "clean" looks like and can go from there. There's some mail I still need to sort in the dining room and sweet Jesus is my living room a mess, and the downstairs bathroom needs to be cleaned, but otherwise, we're doing pretty good on bare bones. I still need to clean, sweep, dust, etc. but at least the clutter is slowly being diminished.
I think that's part of the issue living with a long-time partner. At first, I was hoping Fidget would keep me cleaner. He was a cleaner dude (in my head) so I would notice my clutter more and keep it in check. Instead, the two of us live like 12-year-olds. I know that being in my mother's house often triggers this urge to clean. Everything has a very specific place and looks on point throughout the house, even when she gets a weird shipment from QVC. I think one of the main issues is that I'm hesitant to throw things away; I'm always repurposing and moving things around, so sometimes, I have issues with getting rid or donating things. While I wouldn't classify myself as a hoarder, and I know I wouldn't meet DSM-5 criteria, I have noticed that my tendencies to hold onto things has increased over the past couple years, which may be why it differs from my mother's. In my head, if we throw something away and then I need something later, I don't have the funds to just go out and buy a replacement. My mother, on the other hand, is like, "Whoops, guess we need to order something from HSN" and her problems are solved.
As a side note, I would like to say that a particular Adult thing we do is that Fidget and I actually don't generate a lot of trash. We recycle a LOT and reuse a lot, so we maybe have one bag of trash, including the cats' stuff, per week. Sometimes, it might go to two bags. But I feel as though that's some type of responsible Adulting right there. I do know there is some major recycling we have to do; there's a TV we don't want and a flat screen, and now you have to pay to have them recycled at Best Buy, $25/piece. I wish I could find someone just to give them to so they would get out of my house, but alas, there's a huge TV just hanging out in our office, all, SUP TAKING UP SPACE WOOT.
Now that our bedroom no longer has the Credenza Covered in Clothes, our bedroom is somewhat echo-y. And maybe that's a wake-up call in and of itself. While I have been working on trying to make this a home, I often get stunted because of the lack of funds or simply a lack of energy. I have Grand Plans, and then get stunted. For example, I FINALLY have some cookbook pages taped to my downstairs bathroom walls; I have been thinking of doing that project for over a year! Granted, I was going to use my time at the call center to cut up more pages, but that's neither here nor there. I know Fidget and I will be in this house for longer than what I thought was going to be five years. We're not going to be able to move in 2017 as I had originally hoped, and it's highly probable we'll have our first child here. So, I should work on making this little circle house a home and decorating and finishing all of these projects I have versus just sitting here. Who knows? Maybe I'll actually paint.
Additionally, I have an update about Socks. I took him to the vet yesterday to make sure he was all checked out. While we're still not too sure why he's on eye drops (like, did my parents just never stop the things??), the vet told me he looks great for a 16yo cat. Good job eating lizards, buddy! However, his labwork came back and is showing the very early signs of kidney disease. Additionally, he has a small heart murmur and an irregular heartbeat. These things sound terrifying to me, but the vet assures me these are minor and common things for a cat his age. We might have to start giving him fluids, which should be fabulous, but right now, he's keep on keeping on.
Originally, when I (we?) decided to take him, I was assuming we would only have him for a few years. Consider our home a retirement home! While he continues to not appreciate Sadie's advances, he is quite snuggly at times and isn't swatting at us nearly as much. He still looks at us forlornly when we go outside to smoke and he can't, but we haven't had voiding issues, which was my MAIN concern bringing an outdoor car indoors. I would put money on it that he's up in bed with Fidget right now; as Fidget is learning about whatever political science thing he's learning about, Socks is learning to snuggle more. It is kind of precious how ridiculous he is at night, crawling up onto our chests and getting right in our faces, like, "Hello, human. You can pet me now."
Or he might be thinking, "I WILL STEAL YOUR BREATH IN YOUR SLEEP, HAHA!"
All in all, my hopefulness is still going strong. Maybe I can live with my partner and our two cats in a somewhat cleaner home. Maybe our budgets will balance out. Maybe we'll walk more. Maybe we'll be able to invest time in our home instead of trying to balance everything outside of it...
... it's a good feeling to have some hopefulness that might be solid for once.
Though I am WAY irritated with not being able to work and not bringing in the little income, I have also lined up two in-home clients that are planning to continue with me. So once this contract is over, I'll work my full-time job, then see private clients and the in-home clients on the weekends. It might be an additional 10 hours of work, maybe. But it could be a couple little checks that can continue to bring us back into the black.
I have been taking advantage of the time at home. It's been nice to relax with Fidget, but it's also been phenomenonal to take on some home tasks that have fallen by the wayside due to this hectic schedule. I finally conquered my clothing on Tuesday and felt SO PROUD of myself. I've hung pictures and organized and thrown away so many things. I and three of my grad school friends had planned for a potluck tomorrow. One of the women has never been to our house. I like to think I'm taking advantage of this opportunity to clean, but I also think it's been a long time coming. While Fidget and I frequently try to throw parties in a last ditch effort to clean, we end up with boxes upstairs that I'll "sort through later" and honestly never get to. Instead, by working through things legitimately, it's naturally throwing away things to make the house more functional.
I've said to Fidget many times that I wish we were cleaner, but I think we just aren't. However, with doing this effort now, maybe it'll be maintainable once we know what "clean" looks like and can go from there. There's some mail I still need to sort in the dining room and sweet Jesus is my living room a mess, and the downstairs bathroom needs to be cleaned, but otherwise, we're doing pretty good on bare bones. I still need to clean, sweep, dust, etc. but at least the clutter is slowly being diminished.
I think that's part of the issue living with a long-time partner. At first, I was hoping Fidget would keep me cleaner. He was a cleaner dude (in my head) so I would notice my clutter more and keep it in check. Instead, the two of us live like 12-year-olds. I know that being in my mother's house often triggers this urge to clean. Everything has a very specific place and looks on point throughout the house, even when she gets a weird shipment from QVC. I think one of the main issues is that I'm hesitant to throw things away; I'm always repurposing and moving things around, so sometimes, I have issues with getting rid or donating things. While I wouldn't classify myself as a hoarder, and I know I wouldn't meet DSM-5 criteria, I have noticed that my tendencies to hold onto things has increased over the past couple years, which may be why it differs from my mother's. In my head, if we throw something away and then I need something later, I don't have the funds to just go out and buy a replacement. My mother, on the other hand, is like, "Whoops, guess we need to order something from HSN" and her problems are solved.
As a side note, I would like to say that a particular Adult thing we do is that Fidget and I actually don't generate a lot of trash. We recycle a LOT and reuse a lot, so we maybe have one bag of trash, including the cats' stuff, per week. Sometimes, it might go to two bags. But I feel as though that's some type of responsible Adulting right there. I do know there is some major recycling we have to do; there's a TV we don't want and a flat screen, and now you have to pay to have them recycled at Best Buy, $25/piece. I wish I could find someone just to give them to so they would get out of my house, but alas, there's a huge TV just hanging out in our office, all, SUP TAKING UP SPACE WOOT.
Now that our bedroom no longer has the Credenza Covered in Clothes, our bedroom is somewhat echo-y. And maybe that's a wake-up call in and of itself. While I have been working on trying to make this a home, I often get stunted because of the lack of funds or simply a lack of energy. I have Grand Plans, and then get stunted. For example, I FINALLY have some cookbook pages taped to my downstairs bathroom walls; I have been thinking of doing that project for over a year! Granted, I was going to use my time at the call center to cut up more pages, but that's neither here nor there. I know Fidget and I will be in this house for longer than what I thought was going to be five years. We're not going to be able to move in 2017 as I had originally hoped, and it's highly probable we'll have our first child here. So, I should work on making this little circle house a home and decorating and finishing all of these projects I have versus just sitting here. Who knows? Maybe I'll actually paint.
Additionally, I have an update about Socks. I took him to the vet yesterday to make sure he was all checked out. While we're still not too sure why he's on eye drops (like, did my parents just never stop the things??), the vet told me he looks great for a 16yo cat. Good job eating lizards, buddy! However, his labwork came back and is showing the very early signs of kidney disease. Additionally, he has a small heart murmur and an irregular heartbeat. These things sound terrifying to me, but the vet assures me these are minor and common things for a cat his age. We might have to start giving him fluids, which should be fabulous, but right now, he's keep on keeping on.
Originally, when I (we?) decided to take him, I was assuming we would only have him for a few years. Consider our home a retirement home! While he continues to not appreciate Sadie's advances, he is quite snuggly at times and isn't swatting at us nearly as much. He still looks at us forlornly when we go outside to smoke and he can't, but we haven't had voiding issues, which was my MAIN concern bringing an outdoor car indoors. I would put money on it that he's up in bed with Fidget right now; as Fidget is learning about whatever political science thing he's learning about, Socks is learning to snuggle more. It is kind of precious how ridiculous he is at night, crawling up onto our chests and getting right in our faces, like, "Hello, human. You can pet me now."
Or he might be thinking, "I WILL STEAL YOUR BREATH IN YOUR SLEEP, HAHA!"
All in all, my hopefulness is still going strong. Maybe I can live with my partner and our two cats in a somewhat cleaner home. Maybe our budgets will balance out. Maybe we'll walk more. Maybe we'll be able to invest time in our home instead of trying to balance everything outside of it...
... it's a good feeling to have some hopefulness that might be solid for once.