do i have to study abroad?
fuck, i'm going to china in 6 days. i'm really not ready... for a "life changing experience", to eat dog, to live with a family that doesn't speak English, for the Chinese work hard/play naught ethic, for the unsanitariness, for the background noise, for the constant pollution/ urine smells, to see homeless people deficating in the streets (all but common), to not be able to talk to my sister for 40 minutes on the phone everyday, to be so far from WM and LA, to not have ready access to my doctors, to not have a car, to not know where the hell I am, to uphold "face", to use chopsticks, to squat over holes in the ground rather than toilets, to idolize jackie chan, to be four times as large as everyone else, to not have any close friends at the ready... Serious Doubts About Everything Week.