TOW I'm So Busy!
I haven't posted in a while, so I feel as if I'm due.
In short, I'm busy. I was sick over Christmas/New Year's, at the same time I was attempting to execute a Christmas Program for church and working my first full weeks at a brand new job. So that was my life for a lot of late December.
Then January arrived and with it a SLEW of other new things to keep me from collecting dust. Firstly, everyone and their mother-effing mother is getting married. I'm ambivalent about this. Most couples' impending nuptials I'm happy about, others just irk the piss outta me, much like a fucking splinter that the more you try to remove it, the deeper it embeds itself. But that's OK that I have no one this year, because I'll be busy with other things.
For example, the "The Rachel Whips Out A Tit Tour: 2007" has been launched and we're currently shooting in Brazil. Next month, we'll be hitting Japan---Tokyo! Other places we're including on our tour: Cancun, Monoco, Sydney, Toronto, LA, Topton, and Israel---we live life on the wild side. Mark tells me it should be ready to hit TV advertisements in time for Christmas! [THE PERFECT stocking stuffer!] Oh and I know what you might be asking right now, "Rachel! What happens on this tour? What is the point?" Well my friendly readers, the schedule pretty much just involves one of my tits [I believe we've gone with the left one first, cause that's how you read] coming out at various points 'round the globe as we travel around in a van airbrushed with a half-naked centaur woman [who looks suspiciously like me] riding a dragon. And as for the point...it's just a means to market tacky goods and make me, Val, Kim, John, and Mark all thousandaires. [And let's face it, it's a lot cooler of an idea than "Dicks on Dirtbikes!"]
What else is new, what else is new...
Oh! Dolores and I crashed the Berks Bridal Expo earlier today. Apparently I'm getting married on 1/5/08 to a mystery man with the initals S.M. which apparently are the initials for my Mr. Scorpio Soul-Mate Man [Sean McKeown, Seth MacFarlane, and fake-man Steven McNamara---to whom we said I was affianced.] The reason for the name? A LONG, LONG time ago I did an Internet meme of "Find out your soul mate's name" and it was Steven O'_____. We revised it a bit to include the last name of a crush/friend of mine from college with a sexy voice. Dolores made up the back story. Apparently, he's black Irish and is just marrying me for the green card, but either way, he's HOT and it'll be one HELL of a wedding, we're planning. :D
But, yes, Dolores was my Matron of Honor and we planned a bridal shower, a mock-bachelorette party, and entered into a lot of contests---I'll piss myself if I win anything! There were no dresses for me to try on, BUT we did scope out some Hummer Limos and Bus Limos, as well as caterers and venues. We also found a gorgeous bouquet that we got a picture of. I'll post the link as soon as Dolores uploads the pictures. The craziness abounded! So, if it all were true, I'd have that wedding to plan. But, it's not. [That's some relief, I guess.]
Lastly, we're looking into getting another dog. :D Mom decided the other day she couldn't handle coming home to an empty house and despite Dad's volunteering to stay home on her days off so she could pet him when she came home, we are looking into rescuing a dachshund!
Earlier today, too, we checked out the Lehigh County Humane Society to see what kind of dogs they have. And we found this little darling: Blackie. We're gonna call tomorrow to find out if he's still available and, if so, see if we can come in to meet him.
In short, I'm busy. I was sick over Christmas/New Year's, at the same time I was attempting to execute a Christmas Program for church and working my first full weeks at a brand new job. So that was my life for a lot of late December.
Then January arrived and with it a SLEW of other new things to keep me from collecting dust. Firstly, everyone and their mother-effing mother is getting married. I'm ambivalent about this. Most couples' impending nuptials I'm happy about, others just irk the piss outta me, much like a fucking splinter that the more you try to remove it, the deeper it embeds itself. But that's OK that I have no one this year, because I'll be busy with other things.
For example, the "The Rachel Whips Out A Tit Tour: 2007" has been launched and we're currently shooting in Brazil. Next month, we'll be hitting Japan---Tokyo! Other places we're including on our tour: Cancun, Monoco, Sydney, Toronto, LA, Topton, and Israel---we live life on the wild side. Mark tells me it should be ready to hit TV advertisements in time for Christmas! [THE PERFECT stocking stuffer!] Oh and I know what you might be asking right now, "Rachel! What happens on this tour? What is the point?" Well my friendly readers, the schedule pretty much just involves one of my tits [I believe we've gone with the left one first, cause that's how you read] coming out at various points 'round the globe as we travel around in a van airbrushed with a half-naked centaur woman [who looks suspiciously like me] riding a dragon. And as for the point...it's just a means to market tacky goods and make me, Val, Kim, John, and Mark all thousandaires. [And let's face it, it's a lot cooler of an idea than "Dicks on Dirtbikes!"]
What else is new, what else is new...
Oh! Dolores and I crashed the Berks Bridal Expo earlier today. Apparently I'm getting married on 1/5/08 to a mystery man with the initals S.M. which apparently are the initials for my Mr. Scorpio Soul-Mate Man [Sean McKeown, Seth MacFarlane, and fake-man Steven McNamara---to whom we said I was affianced.] The reason for the name? A LONG, LONG time ago I did an Internet meme of "Find out your soul mate's name" and it was Steven O'_____. We revised it a bit to include the last name of a crush/friend of mine from college with a sexy voice. Dolores made up the back story. Apparently, he's black Irish and is just marrying me for the green card, but either way, he's HOT and it'll be one HELL of a wedding, we're planning. :D
But, yes, Dolores was my Matron of Honor and we planned a bridal shower, a mock-bachelorette party, and entered into a lot of contests---I'll piss myself if I win anything! There were no dresses for me to try on, BUT we did scope out some Hummer Limos and Bus Limos, as well as caterers and venues. We also found a gorgeous bouquet that we got a picture of. I'll post the link as soon as Dolores uploads the pictures. The craziness abounded! So, if it all were true, I'd have that wedding to plan. But, it's not. [That's some relief, I guess.]
Lastly, we're looking into getting another dog. :D Mom decided the other day she couldn't handle coming home to an empty house and despite Dad's volunteering to stay home on her days off so she could pet him when she came home, we are looking into rescuing a dachshund!
Earlier today, too, we checked out the Lehigh County Humane Society to see what kind of dogs they have. And we found this little darling: Blackie. We're gonna call tomorrow to find out if he's still available and, if so, see if we can come in to meet him.