A Loss......and Things
Wow, last week is such a bizarre week! So many things happen at almost the same time, it gave me a peculiar mixed feeling in my heart. I don't even know if I were feeling sad, happy, relieve, content, or anything anymore @_@
My grandma in Bali has passed away and so we have to go to Bali to attend the 'Aben' ceremony (Balinese traditional cremation ceremony)
Here's the report :
I got home to Jakarta from Bandung at Monday, 9th June, around 11 pm, planning to have a lazy rest week before I have to go working for 2 months in Bandung. Suddenly, the next day, at about 11 am, my mother telling me - who were lazying around in my bed - that my dearest grandma in Bali has passed away. The news was really shocking that all of my siblings go 'Huh? Wait, What?!?!' upon hearing that. She was our most beloved grandma, and the most compassionate person I've ever met. She never got angry to any of us her grandchildren, and to tell you the truth, we are not the 'children of angel' type when we were infants (-_-;;)
So, at the same day my parents, my auntie, my 4th sister, and I went first to Bali (my other siblings are coming two days later), BlahBatuh village in Gianyar to be precise. It's quite a traditional village and there's no internet connection there for God sakes! Oh and fyi, my grandma and my mother are Balinese, so that makes me half Balinese hehehe, nggak penting. Okay, back to the story, when we arrived at my grabdma's home, my grandma's body has been wrapped with lots of dry ices and plastic to preserve it from decomposing, it is crucial because the 'Aben' ceremony will be held in about three days later and my grandma's body should be in perfect condition at that time.
I say 'Wow!' for the angst, I've never seen my mother crying so hard like that, she used to be a really strong woman, the same goes to my grandpa. My grandma's maid tell us that when she was cleaning my grandma's room after my grandma passed away, she put a pair of socks my grandma used to wear at her bed, and then my grandpa accidentally saw the socks and began to cry - a lot - Woah! Our tears were falling so hard after hearing it. Although he is such a rigorous man and upon many troubles my grandma's family gave him, he still loved my grandma so much. Damn! When will it's my turn to get a perfect man who love me that much?
So, after three days busy preparing the ceremony, the 'Aben' ceremony was held on Friday, 13th June. Don't say it's Friday the 13th (it became a small joke among us for sometimes ^ ^;;), apparently that day was a good day according to Balinese tradition.
The 'Aben' itself contains lots of ceremonies, the first ceremony is washing the dead body of the deceased, the second ceremony is the procession of the deceased in a decorated 'tandu' (what's it in English? a litter, or something?) to the cremation field, the third ceremony is cremating the deceased, the forth ceremony is picking the remaining bones of the deceased, the fifth ceremony is 'larung' (to wash away the bones to the ocean, luckily the cremation field and the beach are not so far from my grandparents' house so it's not so tiring to walk there ^ ^;;), the sixth and the last ceremony is to cut down the ties between the deceased and the livings, every ceremony has its own pray, so you could guess how long it is to attend the 'Aben' ceremony -_- (about 8 hrs btw, oh my God the corset is killing me!)
Watching the corpse being burned to crisp is really giving me the creep, you know when a corpse was burned the hands usually bent up like a boxing pose? Yeap, I witnessed it. And I thought I saw eyeballs too before it's gone popping, OMG
I know I should've not, but then many thoughts came into my head. Many. Horrible. Thoughts. And my mother used the opportunity to tell me that when she is dead she asks us her children to cremate her and wash away her ashes to the sea. Mom! Please don't remind me that! (now you know one of my horrible thoughts at that time)
I feel so strange, though it is one of rare occasions when the whole big family gather around at my grandparents' house and it's supposed to be a sad moment, in fact I also have many happy moments there, especially with the arrival of our new family member, a 3 months old white Kintamani puppy to accompany his big brother 'Kunda', also a Kintamani dog but he is caramel colored and is rather old, about 5 years old. They are so cute!!!! //^o^// To bad I forgot to bring their photos with me when I go back to Bandung T_T
I really wanted to name the puppy 'Harot', but my father was strongly against it. So we name him 'Benji' instead, so typical........
Also, my brother was accepted in ITB (which makes my parents very happy, good thing, to cheer my mother up again ^ ^) and I got two offerings for a good job in two famous magazines in Indonesia (oh yey!) but since I could only got one job at the moment I have to make a difficult choice about it -_-;;
Now you know why I'm feeling so mixed up now.
Btw, Here Are Some Pictures :
Sorry for the quality, I took it with my 1.3 mega pixel cellphone camera so the quality is not so good. And somehow I only took the cremation ceremony, my 3rd and 4th sister are the ones who did the documentary for the whole ceremony.
Start cremating, my grandma's body was put in that fish-shaped kind of sarcophagus there, my mother chose the shape. When I asked her why she chose fish and not something else, she said that long ago my grandma once told my mother a story about fishes that accompany the deceased souls in the ocean until they reach their final place, so my mother use it as a reference to choose the shape.
Using some tools to enlarge the fire.
The scene that gave me the creeps, can you see the skull and the hands in that fire? Well, yes that is. My mom said that my grandma was waving to say goodbye from there. I don't know whether I should be laughing or crying.
The attendants : husband (my grandpa), 8 children, 8 sons and daughters in law, 22 grandchildren (me included), and the rest of the villagers.
This is what I like about village, the strong family atmosphere among the villagers, it's really heart warming although I can't stand it when they are start gossiping. Dude......
Wow, this is really a long journal, hope you are not bored reading it XDD
Btw, this 'Aben' ceremony is just a minor one, the main 'Aben' ceremony will be held at 19th July 2008, now that's really something to see because it's much more grand that this one and all of the decorations are most outstanding.
I'll be sure to give the photos of it when I go back to Bali next July.
My grandma in Bali has passed away and so we have to go to Bali to attend the 'Aben' ceremony (Balinese traditional cremation ceremony)
Here's the report :
I got home to Jakarta from Bandung at Monday, 9th June, around 11 pm, planning to have a lazy rest week before I have to go working for 2 months in Bandung. Suddenly, the next day, at about 11 am, my mother telling me - who were lazying around in my bed - that my dearest grandma in Bali has passed away. The news was really shocking that all of my siblings go 'Huh? Wait, What?!?!' upon hearing that. She was our most beloved grandma, and the most compassionate person I've ever met. She never got angry to any of us her grandchildren, and to tell you the truth, we are not the 'children of angel' type when we were infants (-_-;;)
So, at the same day my parents, my auntie, my 4th sister, and I went first to Bali (my other siblings are coming two days later), BlahBatuh village in Gianyar to be precise. It's quite a traditional village and there's no internet connection there for God sakes! Oh and fyi, my grandma and my mother are Balinese, so that makes me half Balinese hehehe, nggak penting. Okay, back to the story, when we arrived at my grabdma's home, my grandma's body has been wrapped with lots of dry ices and plastic to preserve it from decomposing, it is crucial because the 'Aben' ceremony will be held in about three days later and my grandma's body should be in perfect condition at that time.
I say 'Wow!' for the angst, I've never seen my mother crying so hard like that, she used to be a really strong woman, the same goes to my grandpa. My grandma's maid tell us that when she was cleaning my grandma's room after my grandma passed away, she put a pair of socks my grandma used to wear at her bed, and then my grandpa accidentally saw the socks and began to cry - a lot - Woah! Our tears were falling so hard after hearing it. Although he is such a rigorous man and upon many troubles my grandma's family gave him, he still loved my grandma so much. Damn! When will it's my turn to get a perfect man who love me that much?
So, after three days busy preparing the ceremony, the 'Aben' ceremony was held on Friday, 13th June. Don't say it's Friday the 13th (it became a small joke among us for sometimes ^ ^;;), apparently that day was a good day according to Balinese tradition.
The 'Aben' itself contains lots of ceremonies, the first ceremony is washing the dead body of the deceased, the second ceremony is the procession of the deceased in a decorated 'tandu' (what's it in English? a litter, or something?) to the cremation field, the third ceremony is cremating the deceased, the forth ceremony is picking the remaining bones of the deceased, the fifth ceremony is 'larung' (to wash away the bones to the ocean, luckily the cremation field and the beach are not so far from my grandparents' house so it's not so tiring to walk there ^ ^;;), the sixth and the last ceremony is to cut down the ties between the deceased and the livings, every ceremony has its own pray, so you could guess how long it is to attend the 'Aben' ceremony -_- (about 8 hrs btw, oh my God the corset is killing me!)
Watching the corpse being burned to crisp is really giving me the creep, you know when a corpse was burned the hands usually bent up like a boxing pose? Yeap, I witnessed it. And I thought I saw eyeballs too before it's gone popping, OMG
I know I should've not, but then many thoughts came into my head. Many. Horrible. Thoughts. And my mother used the opportunity to tell me that when she is dead she asks us her children to cremate her and wash away her ashes to the sea. Mom! Please don't remind me that! (now you know one of my horrible thoughts at that time)
I feel so strange, though it is one of rare occasions when the whole big family gather around at my grandparents' house and it's supposed to be a sad moment, in fact I also have many happy moments there, especially with the arrival of our new family member, a 3 months old white Kintamani puppy to accompany his big brother 'Kunda', also a Kintamani dog but he is caramel colored and is rather old, about 5 years old. They are so cute!!!! //^o^// To bad I forgot to bring their photos with me when I go back to Bandung T_T
I really wanted to name the puppy 'Harot', but my father was strongly against it. So we name him 'Benji' instead, so typical........
Also, my brother was accepted in ITB (which makes my parents very happy, good thing, to cheer my mother up again ^ ^) and I got two offerings for a good job in two famous magazines in Indonesia (oh yey!) but since I could only got one job at the moment I have to make a difficult choice about it -_-;;
Now you know why I'm feeling so mixed up now.
Btw, Here Are Some Pictures :
Sorry for the quality, I took it with my 1.3 mega pixel cellphone camera so the quality is not so good. And somehow I only took the cremation ceremony, my 3rd and 4th sister are the ones who did the documentary for the whole ceremony.
Start cremating, my grandma's body was put in that fish-shaped kind of sarcophagus there, my mother chose the shape. When I asked her why she chose fish and not something else, she said that long ago my grandma once told my mother a story about fishes that accompany the deceased souls in the ocean until they reach their final place, so my mother use it as a reference to choose the shape.
Using some tools to enlarge the fire.
The scene that gave me the creeps, can you see the skull and the hands in that fire? Well, yes that is. My mom said that my grandma was waving to say goodbye from there. I don't know whether I should be laughing or crying.
The attendants : husband (my grandpa), 8 children, 8 sons and daughters in law, 22 grandchildren (me included), and the rest of the villagers.
This is what I like about village, the strong family atmosphere among the villagers, it's really heart warming although I can't stand it when they are start gossiping. Dude......
Wow, this is really a long journal, hope you are not bored reading it XDD
Btw, this 'Aben' ceremony is just a minor one, the main 'Aben' ceremony will be held at 19th July 2008, now that's really something to see because it's much more grand that this one and all of the decorations are most outstanding.
I'll be sure to give the photos of it when I go back to Bali next July.