brain drain
Just need to unload this from my brain.
Have you ever had someone say something to you flippantly or jokingly that just hit you in the middle of some confluence of circumstances in such a way that it managed to just knock the wind out of you?
1) I've been following Sociological Images and racebending for a while, and I can accept that I'm more sensitive to racial issues than I once might have been.
2) I have always been sensitive to my personal racial identity. Most of my close friends are white, and people have been kind of resentful, for lack of a better word, of this about me in the past.
But the fact is I'm black, just as I always have been. The farthest back I can trace my family in any direction is five generations because I'm descended from slaves whose identites were stolen from them. People look at me and make the same judgments.
But I guess people get comfortable and forget this about me. In their defense, I tend to let them because people find racial tension so uncomfortable, and nobody likes a downer.
Yesterday was the anniversary of a fairly important and historically celebrated day in African-American history. For those who don't know, the Emancipation Proclamation officially took effect January 1, 1863, but June 19, 1964, is when it was actually announced to the slaves.
So I made a post on Facebook yesterday wishing everybody a happy Juneteenth, followed by something to the effect of "Cheers for black people not being slaves anymore and for them actually finding out about it." Within minutes, I get a comment that reads, "Says the whitest black person I know."
I don't think I could've been more surprised if she'd punched me in the gut. And I know random strangers and acquaintances think that about me, but what gets me is this is a person I've considered a friend for 20 years. And here she is basically telling me and everyone I know on Facebook that I'm not worthy of the gratitude I feel for not being born into slavery because I don't behave the way she thinks a black person should?
And more than offensive, it was hurtful. I do think she thought she was being funny, but is that funny to people? Am I deserving of that little respect? Is all I am to my friends the punchline of a racist joke?
Have you ever had someone say something to you flippantly or jokingly that just hit you in the middle of some confluence of circumstances in such a way that it managed to just knock the wind out of you?
1) I've been following Sociological Images and racebending for a while, and I can accept that I'm more sensitive to racial issues than I once might have been.
2) I have always been sensitive to my personal racial identity. Most of my close friends are white, and people have been kind of resentful, for lack of a better word, of this about me in the past.
But the fact is I'm black, just as I always have been. The farthest back I can trace my family in any direction is five generations because I'm descended from slaves whose identites were stolen from them. People look at me and make the same judgments.
But I guess people get comfortable and forget this about me. In their defense, I tend to let them because people find racial tension so uncomfortable, and nobody likes a downer.
Yesterday was the anniversary of a fairly important and historically celebrated day in African-American history. For those who don't know, the Emancipation Proclamation officially took effect January 1, 1863, but June 19, 1964, is when it was actually announced to the slaves.
So I made a post on Facebook yesterday wishing everybody a happy Juneteenth, followed by something to the effect of "Cheers for black people not being slaves anymore and for them actually finding out about it." Within minutes, I get a comment that reads, "Says the whitest black person I know."
I don't think I could've been more surprised if she'd punched me in the gut. And I know random strangers and acquaintances think that about me, but what gets me is this is a person I've considered a friend for 20 years. And here she is basically telling me and everyone I know on Facebook that I'm not worthy of the gratitude I feel for not being born into slavery because I don't behave the way she thinks a black person should?
And more than offensive, it was hurtful. I do think she thought she was being funny, but is that funny to people? Am I deserving of that little respect? Is all I am to my friends the punchline of a racist joke?