blackness from the deepest part of my heart given to me by a cold.
i have been doing nothing for over a week in which means no work, no stress, no nothing. i must it's been awesome but i can't help but get bored. i think i gain like 4 or 5 pounds. i really don't want to go back to work but ya know i have too. no work means no money and having no money is shitty. i'm waiting for andrew is get up so we can go get some tapers and plugs for my ears. i can't wait to have some nice looking ears. i must dye my hair soon. its starting to look like crap. my browness is showing and i simply don't like it one bit.
i haven't talk to angie i wonder whats up with her. i know she quit her job but i wonder if she found a new one and i wonder if she move out of her mom's house. i know she doesn't like it there. shit, man i know i didn't like it there. it sucked.i remember it was all our fault for stupid shit happening. blah, that part of my life is over and i couldn't be happier. i haven't talked to any of my friends in san diego. i guess if they don't try to keep in touch then i guess they're not really great friends. i miss my family though. i wonder how my adopted mom is doing. last time i talked to dahlia, she wasn't doing that great. sometimes, i wish i could just go there without the long drive. i want a magic carpet. i think one of the worst thing is to feel bad about not being around when things are hard. i want to be there for dee and chay and berto. i have no idea how i can be in two places at once. i wish it can happen. maybe my heart wouldn't be divided.
something that i can't stop thinking about at this very moment is the time i made out with chris. i remember afterward i felt so nasty. like when i leave i knew nothing was going to come of it. i can sit here and say he wasn't a great kisser but to tell you truth i don't even remember or care. boys like him are a dime a dozen. i glad it didn't work because i ofund someone who is the best. he treats me with respect and loves me for me not just being such a cool ass girl. haha. i think for the most part he understands my complexity. and for that thumps up to you boo!
i haven't talk to angie i wonder whats up with her. i know she quit her job but i wonder if she found a new one and i wonder if she move out of her mom's house. i know she doesn't like it there. shit, man i know i didn't like it there. it sucked.i remember it was all our fault for stupid shit happening. blah, that part of my life is over and i couldn't be happier. i haven't talked to any of my friends in san diego. i guess if they don't try to keep in touch then i guess they're not really great friends. i miss my family though. i wonder how my adopted mom is doing. last time i talked to dahlia, she wasn't doing that great. sometimes, i wish i could just go there without the long drive. i want a magic carpet. i think one of the worst thing is to feel bad about not being around when things are hard. i want to be there for dee and chay and berto. i have no idea how i can be in two places at once. i wish it can happen. maybe my heart wouldn't be divided.
something that i can't stop thinking about at this very moment is the time i made out with chris. i remember afterward i felt so nasty. like when i leave i knew nothing was going to come of it. i can sit here and say he wasn't a great kisser but to tell you truth i don't even remember or care. boys like him are a dime a dozen. i glad it didn't work because i ofund someone who is the best. he treats me with respect and loves me for me not just being such a cool ass girl. haha. i think for the most part he understands my complexity. and for that thumps up to you boo!