A Driving Vent...
To the Air Force "Man" in the big, black Tahoe who tried to run me off the road because of your lack of basic comprehension in the field of appropriately and legally merging your motor vehicle:
It is quite obvious to me that you bought your truck to compensate for something. No one buys a truck that big unless they're insecure about themselves in other areas, or they want to use it to run people off the road because they are an ASSHOLE suffering from blatant narcissism (also called "head-up-rectal-sphincter syndrome"). Needless to say, being in transportation, I know you had 875 feet in which to merge your phalic compensatory car into traffic without showing how big of a dick you really are-- as opposed to how your big truck is trying to compensate for your physiological lack thereof. You're not smart. You're just another ass-hat who thinks the world revolves around himself. Congrats. You win the "Dick of the Day" award.
Being as I had the right-of-way, I was under no obligations to surrender the road to you. Though, because I value my own vehicle, which you obviously had no consideration for as you TRIED TO RUN ME OFF THE ROAD, I, after much protest, allowed you to forcibly advance. Would that I could actually enforce basic traffic laws and then some, I'd have had you march your military ass out of the car to apologize to the 50-some cars that had to wait through 4 cycles of the traffic signal which you so disrespectfully cut off.
HAD I allowed you to crunch my car, you would have seen a serious shit storm. Firstly, your failure to appropriately merge would have garnered you a majority portion of the resulting traffic violation ticket. Secondly, your attachment to the military and the pledge to obey the laws of the land would have subject you to a military reprimand-- if not for the accident, but for putting the very citizens you're sworn to protect as well as MILITARY PROPERTY in danger. I would also be willing to contest the choice of fingers in which you chose to salute me as an act of not only blatant disreguard for your behaviour, but also on the grounds of sexual harassment being that the finger is a physical representation for a sexual solicitation.
My only regret in the matter is that I was too upset about the whole circumstance that I failed to write down your plate number. Believe you me if that ever happens again, I'm writing the number down and not only will I call the police, but I'll take it up with officers at DMAFB too.
So, a hearty congrats to the "Dick of the Day". For your sake, I hope Karma is gentle on you as she shows you a how to have good time the next time you take it up the ass.
Sincerely yours,
Me
It is quite obvious to me that you bought your truck to compensate for something. No one buys a truck that big unless they're insecure about themselves in other areas, or they want to use it to run people off the road because they are an ASSHOLE suffering from blatant narcissism (also called "head-up-rectal-sphincter syndrome"). Needless to say, being in transportation, I know you had 875 feet in which to merge your phalic compensatory car into traffic without showing how big of a dick you really are-- as opposed to how your big truck is trying to compensate for your physiological lack thereof. You're not smart. You're just another ass-hat who thinks the world revolves around himself. Congrats. You win the "Dick of the Day" award.
Being as I had the right-of-way, I was under no obligations to surrender the road to you. Though, because I value my own vehicle, which you obviously had no consideration for as you TRIED TO RUN ME OFF THE ROAD, I, after much protest, allowed you to forcibly advance. Would that I could actually enforce basic traffic laws and then some, I'd have had you march your military ass out of the car to apologize to the 50-some cars that had to wait through 4 cycles of the traffic signal which you so disrespectfully cut off.
HAD I allowed you to crunch my car, you would have seen a serious shit storm. Firstly, your failure to appropriately merge would have garnered you a majority portion of the resulting traffic violation ticket. Secondly, your attachment to the military and the pledge to obey the laws of the land would have subject you to a military reprimand-- if not for the accident, but for putting the very citizens you're sworn to protect as well as MILITARY PROPERTY in danger. I would also be willing to contest the choice of fingers in which you chose to salute me as an act of not only blatant disreguard for your behaviour, but also on the grounds of sexual harassment being that the finger is a physical representation for a sexual solicitation.
My only regret in the matter is that I was too upset about the whole circumstance that I failed to write down your plate number. Believe you me if that ever happens again, I'm writing the number down and not only will I call the police, but I'll take it up with officers at DMAFB too.
So, a hearty congrats to the "Dick of the Day". For your sake, I hope Karma is gentle on you as she shows you a how to have good time the next time you take it up the ass.
Sincerely yours,
Me