Would you want me when I'm not myself...
Do you ever feel like you're drowning? Lately I feel like everything keeps piling and piling up on me and I am about to go under. Was life always meant to be this hard for some people? I look at others, who have these wonderful lives, never worrying about money, or being lonely, or anything at all for that matter, but it seems that these things are always a constant worry for me. If I don't have an ulcer within the next 2 years then I will be very surprised.
I often hide behind a smile, and turn everything in to a joke. But my feelings are catching up to me, and I take a lot of my anger out on my parents. I am constantly arguing with them, and I hate it. But I feel like they cause a lot of my anger too. I feel like such an outcast in my family. I don't fit in. My parents treat me like I am a failure. And when I finally have a day off from school, and work, and music saves lives, and all the other stuff I occupy my time with, and want to just sit on the couch for the day, they treat me like I am the laziest person in the world.
I am exhausted. I exhaust myself.
I am lost. I am lonely.
I am not myself...
I often hide behind a smile, and turn everything in to a joke. But my feelings are catching up to me, and I take a lot of my anger out on my parents. I am constantly arguing with them, and I hate it. But I feel like they cause a lot of my anger too. I feel like such an outcast in my family. I don't fit in. My parents treat me like I am a failure. And when I finally have a day off from school, and work, and music saves lives, and all the other stuff I occupy my time with, and want to just sit on the couch for the day, they treat me like I am the laziest person in the world.
I am exhausted. I exhaust myself.
I am lost. I am lonely.
I am not myself...