Hrmm... is it?
Im not a very religious person. You might call me spiritual, cause I have a few very strong beliefs. But generally speaking, I usually shy away from thinking of things in a higher power kind of sense.
So lets throw that away for a second, and ask from a different perspective...
It seems to me, that across the last six or so years, I have been meeting an inordinate amount of people who are introverted. Shy. Not in the place they really want to be. Not-so-happy. Missing something. And things along these lines.
The single most unifying factor is that it is hard, in some way, for these people to open up.
And apparently, these people like me. I dunno why. Except under extreme duress, I am not really any of the aforementioned things. (Except not in a place I want to be, but thats a whole nother bag o worms). At present, I am also not a very good person to help them break free. At one point, I was. But I lost some stuff (which I believe I have basically pinpointed) and so Im not that guy any more.
But I would like to be. Why?
I desperately want to help these people. I have been there. I understand what it is like. A long time ago, I *was* that person too. And a few things happened along the way that set me in motion towards not being that person anymore. I know this was no fluke. Through countless mistakes and successes, I have learned and experienced a lot about ways to break out of this mold. And I want to share.
I really like people. All kinds. Even though I dont always make the correct assessment of how to show it to everyone - I would go so far as to say this is the singlemost factor behind chemistry, for me. And I really want people to be happy. I want to see them connect - with themselves, with the world, with other people.
I have wanted this for a very long time - it makes me happy to see that look on people's faces. It makes me happy to see other people having fun, or laughing, or even just forgetting about their troubles for an hour. Hell, even just seeing them not feel alone for a bit. And I especially like seeing people unleash their passions - and just geek out about something they really enjoy.
You could almost say that it is My Dream to get people to just loosen up, laugh, and enjoy life for a while.
Given this dream, and armed with the notion that there is some sort of higher power (call it Fate if you want)... is it possible that I am being tested? Tested to see how I will respond? Thrown into an opportunity to start living my dream, now that all the nonsense of solidfying my life is settling down?
Is fate deliberately dropping these people into my lap, and giving me a chance to make a difference? I dunno. But it is suspect. A friend of mine would swear up and down that this is in fact a test, a machination of fate to see if I am ready to embark upon my path. But I reserve skepticism.
I think I am going to just observe trends for a while, and see what happens.
So lets throw that away for a second, and ask from a different perspective...
It seems to me, that across the last six or so years, I have been meeting an inordinate amount of people who are introverted. Shy. Not in the place they really want to be. Not-so-happy. Missing something. And things along these lines.
The single most unifying factor is that it is hard, in some way, for these people to open up.
And apparently, these people like me. I dunno why. Except under extreme duress, I am not really any of the aforementioned things. (Except not in a place I want to be, but thats a whole nother bag o worms). At present, I am also not a very good person to help them break free. At one point, I was. But I lost some stuff (which I believe I have basically pinpointed) and so Im not that guy any more.
But I would like to be. Why?
I desperately want to help these people. I have been there. I understand what it is like. A long time ago, I *was* that person too. And a few things happened along the way that set me in motion towards not being that person anymore. I know this was no fluke. Through countless mistakes and successes, I have learned and experienced a lot about ways to break out of this mold. And I want to share.
I really like people. All kinds. Even though I dont always make the correct assessment of how to show it to everyone - I would go so far as to say this is the singlemost factor behind chemistry, for me. And I really want people to be happy. I want to see them connect - with themselves, with the world, with other people.
I have wanted this for a very long time - it makes me happy to see that look on people's faces. It makes me happy to see other people having fun, or laughing, or even just forgetting about their troubles for an hour. Hell, even just seeing them not feel alone for a bit. And I especially like seeing people unleash their passions - and just geek out about something they really enjoy.
You could almost say that it is My Dream to get people to just loosen up, laugh, and enjoy life for a while.
Given this dream, and armed with the notion that there is some sort of higher power (call it Fate if you want)... is it possible that I am being tested? Tested to see how I will respond? Thrown into an opportunity to start living my dream, now that all the nonsense of solidfying my life is settling down?
Is fate deliberately dropping these people into my lap, and giving me a chance to make a difference? I dunno. But it is suspect. A friend of mine would swear up and down that this is in fact a test, a machination of fate to see if I am ready to embark upon my path. But I reserve skepticism.
I think I am going to just observe trends for a while, and see what happens.