(no subject)
I don't even know where to start. The calm collective Joe that we all saw last week, all that stuff building up throughout the week is beginning to find its way out. I am so completely crushed by the recent event in my life that I don't know what to do. I keep tearing up at every thought of Chris. Why did this have to happen? I don't even know where to start, I don't think I can start. We use to do everything together! Our group was just starting to finally get close again.
I still can't really believe it, I won't believe it. I will not accept the fact that I will not be able to see Chris at the gut on those late weekend nights, or at bowling. It really did happen.....That was my final chance to see him and say to him what I thought, yet I just stood there starring in disbelief thinking it was all just a dream..... I couldnt accept the fact of what was going on when the funeral was taking place, and now I sit here looking back and my vision is no longer blurred by disbelief...and it hurts.
I need sleep. Goodnight.
I still can't really believe it, I won't believe it. I will not accept the fact that I will not be able to see Chris at the gut on those late weekend nights, or at bowling. It really did happen.....That was my final chance to see him and say to him what I thought, yet I just stood there starring in disbelief thinking it was all just a dream..... I couldnt accept the fact of what was going on when the funeral was taking place, and now I sit here looking back and my vision is no longer blurred by disbelief...and it hurts.
I need sleep. Goodnight.