Equillibrium
I think I'm finally rediscovering my proper equillibrium. Which was good, because that was the point of this whole time off thing, and the time off is wrapping up this week. During the last few months before leaving my last job, I started thinking that I needed to be completely out of the software industry and engineering-type jobs in general, and I needed to find a way to seriously emphasize my more creative side. There was a lot of good thought there, but getting out of the seriously crappy (as it had become) situation at my last job has allowed me to eliminate the distortion it was causing in my thinking.
I was still suppressing my creative impulses far too much. And I still think if I were to do college over again without restraints, a history degree or some such would be much more appealing than a CS degree. But I'm no longer quite so down on CS as something to do, at least for now. I'm really a very analytical person. Its not the only feature of my personality, but it is a strong one and its silly to deny that. I like analyzing music, literature, pop culture, history, (or really anything). Probably more than creating music or literature. At least right now (maybe if I keep working at that creating side the balance will shift, or maybe it will just give me more ways to analyze things).
This all makes me feel much better about going to work on Monday. I'm quite looking forward to it, actually, because I miss being challenged by other people. Its a different thrill than diving into your own projects. Like with the create/analyze division, I really need both. But I'm up for some external challenges now that I can actually recognize that I like them, and I like using my analytical skills.
I was still suppressing my creative impulses far too much. And I still think if I were to do college over again without restraints, a history degree or some such would be much more appealing than a CS degree. But I'm no longer quite so down on CS as something to do, at least for now. I'm really a very analytical person. Its not the only feature of my personality, but it is a strong one and its silly to deny that. I like analyzing music, literature, pop culture, history, (or really anything). Probably more than creating music or literature. At least right now (maybe if I keep working at that creating side the balance will shift, or maybe it will just give me more ways to analyze things).
This all makes me feel much better about going to work on Monday. I'm quite looking forward to it, actually, because I miss being challenged by other people. Its a different thrill than diving into your own projects. Like with the create/analyze division, I really need both. But I'm up for some external challenges now that I can actually recognize that I like them, and I like using my analytical skills.