hey you make me think
i am a new woman.
that's the first time i can say it and really mean it and it feels really good. here's why. i think 25 years is long enough to live with inhibitions. those are gone now. to be honest, i had been creeping up to that line but that's over.
this past weekend, i went up to new york to have an action packed weekend with gina and action packed it was. the premise was britten's war requiem with ny phil (which turned out to be a HUGE bust) but ended up being a lot of amazing moments with gina, vanessa, heather and 1000 other people at webster hall. one of those 1000 is quite important because now that person is in my life.
in what way at this moment i can't really say but it's a beautiful thing. and the best thing about that is he's not the only one and i NEVER thought in my life i'd be able to say that but here i am, saying it! (boys like me? no!) but it's not just that. i go out with my friends in baltimore and have a ridiculous time while still working 40 hours a week, doing research and practicing (i could do a little more work on that last one) i think this is what your late 20's is supposed to feel like and damnit, i like it.
i leave for europe in five weeks. i can't get over that either. snd its not even so much that i'm going to europe but what i'm going for. playing bassoon? me? NEVER! and to have a teaching job and sound good it's just like blowing my mind.
i will say that every day or so i feel REALLY overwhelmed and i just have to remind myself to take it one day at a time which can get hard (especially since i think this is like the fastest moving summer i've ever experienced and i have SO much to do) but i just remind myself that i'm having fun and everything works out for the best. so far.
so far, so good.
that's the first time i can say it and really mean it and it feels really good. here's why. i think 25 years is long enough to live with inhibitions. those are gone now. to be honest, i had been creeping up to that line but that's over.
this past weekend, i went up to new york to have an action packed weekend with gina and action packed it was. the premise was britten's war requiem with ny phil (which turned out to be a HUGE bust) but ended up being a lot of amazing moments with gina, vanessa, heather and 1000 other people at webster hall. one of those 1000 is quite important because now that person is in my life.
in what way at this moment i can't really say but it's a beautiful thing. and the best thing about that is he's not the only one and i NEVER thought in my life i'd be able to say that but here i am, saying it! (boys like me? no!) but it's not just that. i go out with my friends in baltimore and have a ridiculous time while still working 40 hours a week, doing research and practicing (i could do a little more work on that last one) i think this is what your late 20's is supposed to feel like and damnit, i like it.
i leave for europe in five weeks. i can't get over that either. snd its not even so much that i'm going to europe but what i'm going for. playing bassoon? me? NEVER! and to have a teaching job and sound good it's just like blowing my mind.
i will say that every day or so i feel REALLY overwhelmed and i just have to remind myself to take it one day at a time which can get hard (especially since i think this is like the fastest moving summer i've ever experienced and i have SO much to do) but i just remind myself that i'm having fun and everything works out for the best. so far.
so far, so good.