[FIC] My S Vol. 3: Torn: Chapter 8
Title: My S, Vol 3: Torn
Author: moon1084
Editor and Chief: fi_chan
Pairing: YunJae
Rating: NC 17
Genre: Violence, Sex, Romance, Drama
Length: 8/9
Graphics: unknowntibidip
Summary: Seoul’s undercover detective Kim JaeJoong has one goal in his life and that is to dispose of all of the guns that stain the streets of South Korea. It’s one hard goal, without a doubt, an overwhelmingly tough job but JaeJoong’s willing to give up his heart, mind and soul to achieve it. He’s also willing to use anyone that comes in his path to get what he wants.
Now, with a new case, new information has surfaced that might further complicate this already complex relationship. When an unruly young man with a fondness for piercings and an enigmatic Jopok leader are added to the situation, sins of the past are exposed once again. And those sins might be capable of shattering the delicate relationship of a detective and his S.
Highly Recommended you read Volume 1 and Volume 2 before reading this.
My S Series' Character Profile ( Will be updated as new characters are introduced )
Previous Chapters of Volume 3: ~I~ (Chapter 1) ~I~ (Chapter 2) ~I~ (Chapter 3A) ~I~ (Chapter 3B) ~I~ (Chapter 4) ~I~ (Chapter 5) ~I~ (Chapter 6) Rated! ~I~ (Chapter 7) Rated! ~I~
Chapter 8
The more time passed, the harder it was getting for JaeJoong to see YunHo again. JaeJoong understood that, so two days later, he gave the man a call. He didn’t say why, but just asked the older man to meet up. YunHo had ChangMin drive him to the place JaeJoong had suggested.
“Why did you call me out here?” YunHo asked when he got out of the black Benz.
JaeJoong didn’t want to take any risks being followed, and having read in the newspaper that the Seoul Port’s workers were on strike, he knew this place would be abandoned.
The sea lay out before them and as the sun settled down, it left behind the rays of orange and purple to color the surface of the winter water. YunHo squinted at it as if he were seeing a mirage.
“I just…thought it would be nice to have a….date here,” JaeJoong answered.
They were on the pier, which was littered with storage containers and huge cranes lined up along the dock.
YunHo snorted. “You really have no idea about what sexy and romantic is. You should’ve chosen a nice sandy beach. Not a place like this.”
They stood side by side, looking at the sea. The silence dragged on, only making it harder for JaeJoong to start the conversation. He wanted to say something, but, unsure of what YunHo was feeling, he found himself searching for the right words to say to the other man.
“JaeJoong…” YunHo didn’t take his eyes of the glittery sea as he spoke.
“Yes, what is it?”
“The sun is setting.” YunHo’s voice was quiet and calm. JaeJoong turned to look at the man. The man’s profile was beautiful. How could YunHo be so beautiful yet so bloody handsome at the same time?
“What is it you want to say to me?” JaeJoong asked gently.
Finally, after a few seconds, YunHo turned to look at him. “I want you to delete me from the records as your S.”
JaeJoong immediately shook his head. He had predicted this might happen, but it still hurt to hear those words. He knew he shouldn’t have ignored YunHo that night. He wasn’t the only one suffering. JunSu had hurt them both greatly. YunHo did the only thing he could to protect them. He knew it and yet he had left YunHo. He knew how the rules of the JoPok world worked. When you were on your enemies’ territory, they had every right to gun you down. You had no power, even if you were ten times more powerful. But, JunSu gave them another ultimatum. As sadistic as it was, it was the only way both of them could’ve walked away breathing.
“No, I won’t. You’re my S. I refuse to let you go. You can’t tell me you’re scared now. What’s the matter? Big and mighty Jung YunHo is scared? I didn’t think you were such a coward.”
JaeJoong had meant to only provoke YunHo with his words, but the older man let the implied insult wash over him.
“You can call me a coward or whatever else you want.” YunHo looked glum, and his half-smile held no mirth. “I’m sorry but…I’m sorry. I’m finished now.”
“YunHo please…”
JaeJoong grabbed the taller man’s jacket collar. He couldn’t accept being abandoned by the one man whom he had come to rely on so often. The one and only man that made him feel so many emotions. Emotions he didn’t think he could ever feel. He felt betrayed. He couldn’t think straight.
“I just can’t do any more for you now. You must realize that everything has its limits?”
“No! It doesn’t! I’m not scared of anything, as long as I’m with you!”
JaeJoong was hurting, but it was clear that YunHo was hurting just as much. The older man was hesitating. He found himself walking JaeJoong’s path, with no clear exit in sight. They had both made vows to each other.
“I’m scared. I’m really scared. I’m scared that if you’re seen with me, are with me, I’ll hurt you. I couldn’t stand that. Your brother-in-law was right. I’m destroying you,” YunHo said, gazing into JaeJoong’s eyes. “If anything ever happened to you…I’ve spent so many countless nights not sleeping because I’m worrying about it. I know I sound pathetic, but I am that scared.”
JaeJoong was so shocked. YunHo had just bared his soul. His S was scared that JunSu would hurt him. His S was worried about putting him in danger.
“HanGeng was right. If you stay with me any longer, then there’ll be no turning back. It’ll be the end of you.”
“YunHo…”
Was YunHo breaking up with JaeJoong to protect him? Now, when he felt so weak? YunHo’s complete sincerity was the final nail in the coffin.
JaeJoong had been selfish. He knew he had always used people. He had used his body to coerce YunHo to do his S-work, despite knowing that YunHo wanted more from him than just sex.
JaeJoong had known it well. He had used him and pretended that YunHo hadn’t cared for him. If he had been a good person, he would’ve put a stop this mess a long time ago.
He had realized the truth a long time ago, but he had pretended not to see it. Instead of giving his heart, he had given his body. He was a criminal. He had hurt this man. This good man, who loves him and all he wanted in return was his love. It was detestable. Pathetic. He didn’t even want to think about it any longer. He was the worst man. And despite all of this, YunHo still cared for him enough to even let him go. His S was still concerned for him.
“YunHo…I-I...please,” JaeJoong stuttered. His chest was tight and it was hard to breathe. Tears streamed down his face. All he could see was YunHo’s face.
JaeJoong hated himself. He hated himself so much. He couldn’t forgive himself. But he couldn’t change the way he lived his life. He wished he could disappear. He wished he could kill himself for hurting this man so much.
“YunHo…I don’t want to lose you. Please…I might not know what you want…but…I…need you. Want you.” JaeJoong knew that YunHo could be impudent and arrogant at times but he still didn’t want to lose this man. He didn’t want to let go. “I don’t mind getting hurt. They can do whatever they want to me. As long as I have you, as long as it’s for you, I wouldn’t mind dying. Just don’t leave me. Don’t tell me this is the end. You’re mine. You’re my S…” JaeJoong trailed off. He knew he was simpering like a child. He had become so emotional, he could only think of his own needs. He was being selfish, but at this moment, he couldn’t help it.
“Joongie…crying is against the rules, baby.” YunHo sighed and pulled JaeJoong into his chest. “You know that I hate to see these beautiful eyes shed tears.”
“No, I don’t. I just…I…” JaeJoong faltered again.
I love you. I love you so fucking much. More than anything in this world. More than anyone in this world.
He still couldn’t say it though. He couldn’t express it. But in his torn and cracked heart, he loved only YunHo.
He was resigned to it now. He had vowed to not fall in love, but now he wanted to toss all his previous restrictions into the sea. He wanted to tell YunHo everything. He wanted to fall to his knees and beg YunHo to love him too.
But something inside JaeJoong still held him back. The two conflicting emotions ripped his heart in two.
YunHo ruffled JaeJoong’s hair and then softly kissed his forehead. “Why is my baby crying like such a baby, huh?” YunHo said, sounding exasperated. However, his eyes betrayed his true emotions. “I’m sorry. I just can’t take another rejection from you. My heart won’t be able to take it.”
Recalling what had happened in front of JunSu’s apartment building, JaeJoong remembered how he had gone with Geng instead; he had hurt YunHo. In that case, JaeJoong was really to blame for this mess. He was the one who destroyed the relationship. YunHo was always there for him when he needed him to be, and the one time YunHo needed him, he abandoned him. He had seen the look of hurt in YunHo’s eyes when he left him there.
“I’m sorry,” JaeJoong mumbled. “I couldn’t stop the way I was feeling that night.”
“Don’t apologize. I of all people know what I did to you that night. I wanted to do whatever I could to save you, though.”
“I know that, dammit! I know that…I know it was all for m-me,” JaeJoong stuttered again. He looked up.
YunHo was smiling down at him. “Man, look at your face and eyes. It’s all red and blotchy. How could I be attracted to such a face, I don’t even know?” YunHo teased.
JaeJoong grimaced. “Whose fault is that, you bastard?”
“Grimacing doesn’t make you look any better,” YunHo whispered in JaeJoong’s ear. He bent down and kissed him.
“YunHo…?”
“Yes, baby…” YunHo answered leaving kisses on JaeJoong’s eyes.
“I want you…”
“Here? Now?”
“Here. Now. Right now. Please!”
There was no one on the pier. Only the sea stretched out in front of them. JaeJoong made up his mind and wrapped his arms around YunHo.
“Please, YunHo! I need to feel you,” JaeJoong said, grabbing YunHo’s chin and bringing it down so they were staring at each other.
JaeJoong knew that YunHo was hesitating when he started looking around but he also knew that YunHo couldn’t ever deny him of anything.
He buried his face in the crook of YunHo’s neck and took a deep breath to inhale his lover’s scent.
“YunHo…I’m cold. Warm me up please. I’m cold.”
“I’ll warm you up.”
YunHo pushed JaeJoong against one of the containers and kissed him passionately.
Their lips met and their teeth clicked from the rough contact. They had expressed the depth of the desire they held for each other and now they needed to show it to each other in ways words couldn’t. They groped and fondled each other until JaeJoong didn’t know where they began and where they ended.
YunHo licked JaeJoong’s tears off of his face as he unzipped his jeans. The cold air hurt JaeJoong’s sensitive skin and he shivered a little.
To protect him from the cold, YunHo opened his coat and wrapped it around to where they were both covered from the harsh winter’s air. “Is this okay, baby?”
YunHo’s warm breath hit JaeJoong’s cold neck. He felt shivers down his spine.
“God, YunHo…I’m fine, please, hurry. I need you,” JaeJoong urged. He wanted them to be one. He wanted to feel the man he loved inside of him. He wanted YunHo to know he only belonged to him and he only belonged to YunHo. He urgently rubbed his groin against YunHo’s.
“Mmhm…YunHo.”
JaeJoong’s pushed his pants down and turned around. As YunHo unzipped himself with one hand, JaeJoong grabbed the taller man’s other hand and sucked on his finger. Those beautiful fingers he loved so much…
“That’s enough, baby,” YunHo said, as he pulled his finger out of JaeJoong’s mouth and pushed it inside of the beautiful man. Finally, JaeJoong’s desires were answered. He uttered a small cry.
YunHo pressed JaeJoong against the container and then pulled his jeans further down. He pushed inside JaeJoong slowly. JaeJoong wasn’t wet enough or stretched enough. But JaeJoong clung to YunHo and opened himself up as much as possible. YunHo knew what JaeJoong liked and thrust deep inside of him.
“Ah! Mmm…YunHo!
It hurt but JaeJoong wanted to feel everything. He felt every inch YunHo moved inside of him and he loved it. He wanted all of this man. He wanted them to be one. He never ever wanted to be parted from him ever again.
“JaeJoong…baby!” YunHo said as he pushed in even deeper.
“Mm…YunHo! YunHo! Harder please. I need to feel you deeper!”
YunHo suddenly stopped his thrusts and pulled out of him.
“YunHo…no… more…please! I want you so much!”
“Hold on, baby. I want to see your beautiful face when I come inside of you.”
JaeJoong moaned at YunHo’s statement. JaeJoong thought of how much he loved this man and no one could ever stop him from doing so.
YunHo turned JaeJoong around and completely removed the jeans off of the smaller man’s body. He then hoisted JaeJoong’s back up against the container and JaeJoong got the hint to wrap his legs around the older man’s body.
He pushed himself into JaeJoong again with a low growl.
“YunHo! Mmmm…” JaeJoong moaned.
YunHo started to thrust into the smaller man.
“JaeJoong…you like it, baby?”
JaeJoong couldn’t think straight to give him an answer so he answered the best way he could.
He moaned out to his lover, “Mmmm….mmm. YunHo, harder please. Make me bleed.”
“Oh God! JaeJoong! You’ll be the death of me, baby,” YunHo said, as he started to thrust deeper into the man.
JaeJoong was bouncing on top on YunHo’s dick. He couldn’t get enough. He needed this. He wanted this. He needed to feel YunHo. To mark him as his forever.
He moved back to lean his head against the container and started using it as leverage to push harder against YunHo. To match YunHo’s every thrust. He wanted to feel him hard and deep. He wanted to feel YunHo inside of him, even if YunHo wasn’t there.
The only sounds that could be heard were their bodies meeting in passion, their breathless gasps and the cold wind sweeping past them.
With YunHo’s hard thrust, JaeJoong’s head thumped against the container. YunHo noticed this and cradled JaeJoong’s head in his hand. That was one of the reasons JaeJoong loved him. YunHo cared for him. He was sweet to him. He always noticed the small things.
“YunHo, kiss me please.”
YunHo leaned over and kissed JaeJoong hard. Their lips and tongues met. JaeJoong didn’t try to fight for control. He let YunHo ravish him till he was seeing nothing but YunHo behind his closed eyelids.
JaeJoong pushed off the container and into YunHo. He pulled his arms around the taller man’s shoulders. As he kept bouncing, YunHo kept pushing. They mouths separated only when they felt they couldn’t breathe any longer.
He met YunHo’s gaze and grabbed the man’s hand and repeated the steps YunHo had done to him in the past. He brought YunHo’s hand to his lips and kissed it. He then sucked on the older man’s fingers, one by one, letting them each go with a loud moan, while keeping their eyes looked.
“Joongie…fuck…Mmmm! Baby, don’t! Just a bit longer…” YunHo said as he tried to keep himself together.
He pushed them against the container again and kept thrusting.
They both knew the other was close.
JaeJoong came first, causing him to clinch around YunHo’s cock. That was the last straw for YunHo.
“Ahhhhhh!” With a loud growl, YunHo came inside his lover.
He was about to pull out when JaeJoong stopped him.
“Not yet. Stay just like this,” JaeJoong said, as he rested his head against YunHo’s shoulder.
The lovers wanted to bask in their love-making.
YunHo went soft inside of the other man but still hadn’t pulled out or released his hold on him.
Finally, JaeJoong relaxed in YunHo’s arms. He was glad YunHo didn’t let him go, because he knew his legs weren’t sturdy enough to hold him up. His legs hung resting and dangled around YunHo’s waist.
YunHo was kissed his head and then pulled JaeJoong’s face up to drop some more gentle kisses all over the man’s face.
“JaeJoong, don’t forget,” YunHo said earnestly.
“Don’t forget what, YunHo?” JaeJoong asked lazily. The effect of the love-making had tired him out, both physically and mentally. But in a way he would gladly welcome again.
“You vowed to never betray me. I made you the same vow. You can ask for my help anytime you want. You’re never ever alone.”
YunHo seemed to sense that more danger lay ahead for both of them.
“Don’t leave me-whatever happens. Don’t ever leave me,” YunHo whispered.
JaeJoong’s eyes teared up at the man’s plea and as if lost in a dream, he could only nod his head.
***
After they got dressed and shared a few more kisses, they got into the car together. ChangMin didn’t say a word; he just started the car and pulled onto the road. JaeJoong checked to see if YunHo and him could’ve been spotted from where the car was parked, and he figured ChangMin couldn’t have been able to see their exchange. But ChangMin was an astute man and probably figured out what had happened.
JaeJoong looked out the window and felt a little guilty.
When YunHo took off his coat, his elbow hit JaeJoong in the chest.
“Ouch.”
Seeing JaeJoong’s face screw up in pain, YunHo looked worried. “Did I injure you somewhere?”
If it had been a regular old bruise, then JaeJoong would’ve just ignored the pain. But the piercings that YooChun had forced on him kind of still hurt. JaeJoong said as much to YunHo.
“What the hell is wrong with you? Why haven’t you taken them out yet?!” YunHo shouted angrily.
“YunHo...” JaeJoong whispered, “We just made love and you are screaming at me.”
At that, YunHo calmed down and started laughing. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell but why didn’t you take them out?”
“I tried to, but your brother super-glued them in. I’ll have to cut them off, but I don’t have the right-sized tools at my house. But I’ve been cleaning them and I haven’t gotten signs of any infections. I’ll go and buy something smaller but I haven’t had time to,” JaeJoong explained.
“Come to my place,” YunHo ordered. “I have something small enough.”
When they arrived at YunHo’s penthouse, ChangMin brought them a small toolbox and first-aid kit. JaeJoong took off his sweater and sat on the sofa. YunHo crossed his arms and scowled at his nipple. But when he brought his eyes down to the navel, JaeJoong could swear he saw a slight glint of sparkle in YunHo’s eyes.
“You like them?” JaeJoong asked with a teasing smile.
“What…? No….What are you talking about?” YunHo stuttered and tried to keep his cool.
ChangMin and JaeJoong both chuckled at YunHo.
“What? What’s so funny?” YunHo asked, slightly pissed off for being laughed at by his lover and his bodyguard.
“Nothing,” JaeJoong and ChangMin said in unison, only to look at each other and laugh again.
“Whatever. The nipple one looks red. Does it hurt?” YunHo said, trying to look at anyplace else but JaeJoong’s navel piercing.
It was obvious to JaeJoong that YunHo liked how it looked on him.
“Yeah it does but I kinda like the one down here. What do you think?” JaeJoong asked, playing around with the piercing on his belly button.
“I don’t know. It’s up to you. You are a grown man. And when do you ever listen to me, anyways,” YunHo said, still keeping his arms crossed, like a child throwing a tantrum.
ChangMin took out a tiny metal cutter. It was just small enough to get in the space between the end of the stud and JaeJoong’s skin. ChangMin skillfully cut off the end of the stud. He then pulled out the bar in one swift clean move. Even though he was quick with it, the wound still hadn’t healed so fresh blood oozed from the opening.
“Aiiiiish! That little brat. Wait till I got my hands on his neck,” YunHo grunted.
“You did a good job keeping them clean but you need to disinfect it again,” ChangMin advised as he covered JaeJoong’s nipple in gauze.
“Thanks.”
“Let me go clean the cutter so that it won’t spread infection to the navel,” ChangMin said, giving time for YunHo and JaeJoong to talk. He knew YunHo didn’t really want JaeJoong to remove the navel piercing.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to keep this one?” JaeJoong said, teasing YunHo. “I’m sure you can find plenty of ways to play with this if I were to keep it.”
YunHo’s eyes went wide from shock. He wasn’t used to his lover being so naughty. But still he didn’t give the man an answer.
JaeJoong had a feeling as to why YunHo was not giving him an answer. He had gotten them in a brutal way and YunHo didn’t want to hurt him by asking him to keep it so instead he just chose to remain quiet.
Just as JaeJoong was about to say something, ChangMin walked in with the cleaned metal cutters.
“ChangMin, can you hurry up and take this out. I thought I would keep it in for someone else but since that someone else doesn’t want to say something...”
“Yes, JaeJoong-shii!”
ChangMin slowly reached close to JaeJoong’s navel to cut the piercing off but was stopped by YunHo’s scream.
“Gaaaaaah! Dammit! Keep it in. Shit! Keep it in. I want you to keep it in,” YunHo said.
JaeJoong could only roll into the sofa and starting giggling hysterically.
ChangMin held his composure and made an excuse to go make coffee so he could leave the two lovers alone.
JaeJoong’s laughter was dying down by the time ChangMin disappeared into the kitchen.
YunHo wasn’t looking at him so he got up from the couch and went to go sit in YunHo’s lap.
“Who’s being a baby now, huh?” JaeJoong asked, in the mood to bother YunHo. He didn’t get that many opportunities to tease the older man.
YunHo instead pulled JaeJoong into a tight hug and apologized on behalf of his brother. “I’m really sorry.”
JaeJoong pulled back from the hug and looked at YunHo.
“It’s not your fault.”
“Yes it is. You don’t know what I did. It is my fault that YooChun turned out this way.”
JaeJoong looked at YunHo. He understood what his lover was trying to say. He hesitated, wondering if he should ask about it. He didn’t know if he had the right.
“YunHo, you don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to.”
“It doesn’t have anything to do with you anymore.”
JaeJoong nodded. “I know. Tell me?”
YunHo fiddled with the stud in JaeJoong’s navel; slowly caressing his fingers over it. His touch felt good to JaeJoong there. “My mother was a hostess in a club. She met the president of the Park Group. They became lovers, and in a short time later, I was born. The president already had a wife. He divorced his first wife, but he still didn’t marry my mother. But instead, he took a liking to YooChun’s mother. It was his second marriage. I hated him. He only ever hurt my mother. He never thought of anyone else but himself. I was taken into the president’s house, but I couldn’t stand living in that man’s territory. And so, even when I moved into the president’s house, I didn’t take the Park name. My mother had an uncle that often looked after her. He used to lead a gang, and even when he quit the organization, he never totally cut ties with the criminal underworld. He often looked after me when I was little and he continued to do so as I grew older.”
JaeJoong he rested his head against YunHo’s chest. He could feel the man’s heart beat against his face. He raised his hand to rest on YunHo’s heart, liking the way it felt. “Why didn’t you live with your uncle?”
YunHo grimaced. “He invited me, but I refused. I hated the president, but I also hated the woman and the brother I had never met. I felt so much rage for them because they enjoyed a comfortable, happy life as his proper life. The life my mother had been refused. I had been childish. I believed that entering their home would be like some sort of revenge.”
ChangMin returned, carrying a tray with cups of coffee. He placed it down on the table and turned to go but YunHo stopped him from leaving. “Sit down. You’re part of all of this too.”
JaeJoong got off YunHo’s lap and sat next to him. He didn’t want to make ChangMin uncomfortable by sitting like that.
ChangMin nodded and sat.
“YooChun’s mother was a young woman called Eugene. She was beautiful, and that was probably the reason the president forced her to be his lover. When she turned just sixteen, YooChun was born. So he married her. But soon after YooChun’s birth, she became very sickly and because of that she couldn’t satisfy the president. The president often left her alone for months on end. When they took me in, YooChun was seven, Eugene was twenty-three and I was sixteen. Eugene was a very obedient woman. She lived quietly with YooChun and stayed away from people as much as possible. She never raised her voice and even though she knew what the president did behind her back, she never objected. It surprised me. I thought that she would do whatever she wanted. But she was nice to me, even though I was a bastard. Soon enough, I started to feel affection towards Eugene and YooChun. I liked Eugene’s sweet innocence and I wanted to care for them.”
YunHo suddenly stopped himself. His eyes glazed over as feelings from the distant past resurfaced once more. Finally, he sighed and continued: “Eugene was the only woman I’ve ever wanted. Once I grew into a man, she fell in love with me too.”
YunHo had told JaeJoong once before that there had been a person he’d fallen so deeply in love with that it had almost destroyed him. That person, JaeJoong now realized, had been YooChun’s mother.
“Of course, the relationship was completely forbidden. We would meet in secret, afraid that someone would spot us. The president discovered our relationship a year later. He went crazy and in a blind rage beat us both. It was clear that he wasn’t going to let Eugene go. I decided that night that I would take her away from the house.”
“You…”
“Yes, we ran away together. We dropped everything and ran as far away from that man as we could. We rented a tiny, run-down apartment and lived together. We were so happy. But it only lasted two months.” YunHo fell silent again.
“You were caught?” JaeJoong asked.
“No. Eugene died. She hung herself.”
JaeJoong was speechless. He gazed silently at YunHo.
“The president hushed it all up. Publicly, Eugene died of a heart attack. No one else in the organization knows the truth. I cut my ties and from then on had no contact with the Park Group. I sometimes kept in touch with YooChun because I did care for him. When the president died four years ago, YooChun asked me to come back to the Park Group.”
The truth behind these words was very grave. YunHo must have felt guilty for taking YooChun’s mother away from him. YooChun must have been deeply hurt that both his mother and his half-brother had left him behind.
“I’m really sorry that you have been caught between my brother and me. It should’ve just stayed between us.” YunHo stood up. He looked tired as he walked into the bedroom.
JaeJoong turned to look at ChangMin. “Why did Eugene kill herself? I mean I know they ran away together and that relationship wasn’t really unconventional, but to die and leave YunHo behind?”
ChangMin shook his head. “No one knows why she did. I suspect even Boss didn’t really know. Maybe an impulsive act. Maybe she was scared for the future. Maybe from the guilt of leaving behind YooChun. No one can know once a person is dead.” ChangMin cleared his throat. “That day, I got a phone call from Boss and I rushed to their apartment. As soon as I got through the door, I saw Boss rocking her lifeless body back and forth. She was already dead before he’d come home.”
“I think I should be with YunHo now,” JaeJoong stood up.
ChangMin stood up as well and said, “Please, don’t let me get in the way.”
JaeJoong was about to open the door when ChangMin called out to him. “JaeJoong-shii? My boss is a deep man. He has too much love in him. Sometimes all that passion can overwhelm others… To some, a love so strong can be poison to those that are weak.”
ChangMin truly understood YunHo. He understood his boss more than anyone else. He wanted JaeJoong to understand his boss as well.
“I’m sorry. I think I’ve said too much.” He gave a small smile.
It was the first time JaeJoong has witnessed ChangMin acting so…human.
JaeJoong watched ChangMin leave. Suddenly, he remembered something from a year and a half ago. He had been nervous about pursuing his relationship with YunHo. ChangMin had been standing in the front of that very door, and he had admonished YunHo about his aggressive approach toward JaeJoong-but ChangMin had called his boss, “Mr. Jung.”
Perhaps, in that moment, ChangMin had been warning YunHo to not overwhelm JaeJoong. Perhaps ChangMin had been warning him not to make the same mistake twice.
JaeJoong opened the door and stepped into the bedroom. YunHo was lying on the bed, staring up at the ceiling.
“Where’s ChangMin?”
“He left.”
JaeJoong kneeled on the floor and rested his upper body on the bed. He pressed his forehead against YunHo’s.
YunHo stroked JaeJoong’s hair. “It’s all in the past,” he muttered. “But YooChun isn’t the same as he was in the past. He used to be such a bright and happy kid, but when Eugene died, he completely changed. He started acting weird. First, his mother ran away with his half-brother and then committed suicide. She ran away from his only home. He couldn’t run away and was left all alone.”
YunHo sighed. “I feel that I’ll always be trying to make up for my sins against him. Perhaps, I’ve even been avoiding it. I don’t know how I should behave around him. It’s all because of my hesitation to reprimand him that you’ve been dragged into this as well.”
“YunHo stop saying that. It’s not all your fault. You know it doesn’t matter how you treat him. The only person who can change YooChun is YooChun himself.”
JaeJoong knew that that had been the case where he was concerned. He had only stopped hating Geng for getting over Boa’s death because he himself had changed. Geng had always been nice to him and treated him kindly, but, for a long time, JaeJoong had been too stubborn to accept his friendship. His brotherly love.
YunHo sat up and patted the space on the bed next to him. “Here, come up.”
JaeJoong moved up and snuggled closer. YunHo held JaeJoong’s head to his chest. YunHo’s past had made him feel sad.
YunHo had put his life on the line, but still lost his first love forever. JaeJoong wondered if YunHo hated her for leaving him alone. Yet he felt happy that he had YunHo now. If Eugene was still around, would he have had the chance to be with YunHo? He couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty for having those thoughts.
Silence rained over them. They just lay there for a while, hearing each other’s heartbeats.
Finally after a while, JaeJoong felt like breaking out of their silence. He wanted to forget about their pasts for a while and just dwell in the present.
“YunHo?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Want to show how many ways we can play with my new piercing?”
“Gladly.”
A/N#1: Okay, so I guess in the end, I couldn't keep our beloved YunJae apart after all. And if you don't like it, well than, to bad. I'm
such a sucker for these two, I swear. Also, they have finally come to the point where JaeJoong realizes just how much he
loves his HoBear and they make LOVE versus just doing. But don't get happy just yet, because it won't last for too long. I think!
A/N#2: So that was three updates within a week. I think I've definitely spoiled you guys rotten. But then again, you guys have made
me really happy with all the comments I've received. I really like reading all the theories you guys make as to what you think,
who is and what's happening or going to happen. I guess that silent reader's rant entry I did, really helped me out. I swear
other authors need to do it too.
A/N#3: Don't forget. I don't post updates in any other place but jaeho_complex now!
A/N#4: And I swear this is my last a/n, where I present to you, my Twitter. And no I didn't make it because the Trio made it. I've had it
way before those three noobs. If you do add me, let me know who you are from lj because I don't add people I don't
recognize.