Spirits and Skeins and Other Things....
After the spiders' prompt (finding the inexplicably crawling on me in the car - tiny ones) that I should be spinning - it IS that time of year, after all...I've been spinning. More hemp and bamboo for facial scrubbies. The ones I made before are holding up, so I will attempt to make these more attractive and perhaps give them as gifts.
This is the latest skein:
Never let it be said that I don't listen to the prompting of Spirit. In yet another encounter, this one just a little more 'woo-worthy'...Robb and I did an Ancestor Rite last weekend at the UU Church. We had an awesome time with mostly new folks since the regular crowd were at a handfasting - I'm always confused at the number of people who wish to get married at Samhain - but to each their own. I would think one would want the blessing of the Gods at their wedding....and from Samhain to Yule...they are in the Underworld...so...anyway, to each their own as I said. We went ahead with the Ancestor Rite, and it was supposed to happen the way it did.
Earlier in the afternoon, Robb and I had gone to Ruby Tuesday for lunch. We got a 25% off coupon in the mail and thought...hey lunch! We come into the entryway of Ruby Tuesday, and there is this little old lady standing in there like she's waiting for someone. She has white hair, sunglasses and a blue sweater over a white shirt and dark pants. She asked us for the time. My phone was charging in the car, but Robb had his and gave her the time...12:12.
So we had our lunch and then made our way to the church and set up. Most of the people there were students of a Witchcraft and Religion class from UT, including the anthropology instructors. They were invited to bring pictures of loved ones to place on the altar and as I was looking at the pictures...one of an older couple, obviously an older picture, stood out for me. The lady in the picture very closely resembled the older lady that had asked us for the time earlier in the day. I called Robb over and showed him the picture and asked him if it reminded him of anyone. He immediately noted the resemblance of the woman in the picture to the woman that had asked us for the time. I made a mental note to ask who brought the picture after the rite.
After the rite, I asked who brought the picture of the couple. The class instructor's wife, stepped forward. I asked her if the date, December 12, or the numbers 12:12 meant anything to her. She gasped and said "That's my birthday!" I told her about the lady we met earlier in the day and the time and that she resembled the woman in the picture...who was her grandmother. She had desired to communicate with her grandparents, and we all felt like this was her grandmother making her presence known.
Having things like this happen is why we continue to do these things. There were other things that happened, things that meant something only to the people participating. I really believe that Ancestor Rites, whether it be to communicate once in a while or say good-bye or even hello, are important to the people who maintain emotional connections to those gone before them. Sometimes, just the act of saying good-bye is enough. Other times, it is important for people to speak of their loved ones, tell their stories, so that others will remember, and their loved ones are not forgotten and live on in the memories of those who hear their stories.
This time of year is usually difficult for me. This whole last year I have felt disconnected from that emotional pull of Samhain. I don't know if this means I have finally been released from whatever hold this time of year holds on me, or that I have become less sensitive or healed from past year's traumas, gods know there has been a history for me of holding on to things. I have five retrograde planets in my natal chart...I hold on to things too much sometimes, beating things to death thinking about them and examining them until I'm completely satisfied that I did the right thing at the time or have done the right thing since or whatever. I tend to hold on to things a lot longer than is probably necessary. I'm seeing a trend of letting go. I don't know if it's because I had so much ripped away over this period of time that I've 'learned' that it repeats itself and I need to let it go.
I haven't talked much at all about the death of my most recent familiar. Mojo was especially dear to me. I waited a long time to have another cat like him... a black male cat...I have had Lucifer, Aengus, Michah and Mojo...there have been others, females, who have worked with me, but the males have been the most memorable. I have some of his fur that I plan to spin with some bamboo to make either a keyfob or a bookmark. He has declined to work with me from the other side like Luna and Micah and Boo and Elektra do from time to time. Aengus and Lucifer don't really 'work' with me per se, but they make their presence known when I need comfort or just for company, I feel their weight on the bed beside me, or I feel soft fur slide past my leg or hear purring next to my ear. I think Mojo will be like them, his choice. Others bring messages, or confirm things for me from time to time. Once Luna fully manifested to me, following me up the driveway at our old house while I was on the phone with Trudy. I literally screeched into the phone it startled me so badly. It's quite something to turn around and see a full grown bobcat...let alone one that isn't there. She caused quite a stir the year I put her into the Ancestor's fire at FOS as well. People swore they saw her all over the park that night, to the point that people were convinced there was an ACTUAL bobcat roaming the campground. She follows me, she is not attached to the location where she lived, nor where she is buried, she stays with me. If you've never had an animal companion do that, I wish it for you, it's an awesome experience to say the least.
There has still been no progress on the work front. I was offered a part-time job of 10-15 hours at minimum wage..which I could not take because I could not afford the gas to get there on what I would have been paid. There was another possibility, which did not pan out, but I remain hopeful that I will find employment soon. I'm not looking for just anything. Part-time is fine if it pays enough or isn't too far away. I just need some money of my own. It says something about my conditioning that I don't value the work I do in keeping the house and taking care of the family, running the errands and playing taxi. Robb would most assuredly have to pay someone to do these things if I weren't here. I suppose it's a good thing room and board are included! But I find myself unable to concentrate for long periods, leaving things unfinished more often than usual. Scattered you might say. I'm sleeping fine, and I don't seem to be depressed because I'm still finding things to do, things to look forward to, so I don't think I'm depressed exactly.
There have been some great things happening, like the election for one. I'm not Obama's biggest fan, but I do think he's an honest, caring man, whose heart is in the right place. I kept looking at Romney, examining the facts about him, watching him, the way he interacted, the first hand accounts of people who had met and dealt with him. I found absolutely nothing to recommend him, nothing. I didn't even like looking at him, he actually made me physically ill. Emotional responses yes. But I listen to my gut, and when just looking at someone makes me sick, the last thing I am going to do is vote for them to be President. I can't even talk about Mr. Lyin' Ryan, Mr. Sanpaku eyes. He will die strangely, I believe. I don't know how, but it will come from outside him. Some craziness.
I don't know what the future holds for this country, but I know it's now a better future than it would have been had that man been elected. That's all I really want to say about the politics of the day. I felt pretty strongly about it, against one that is. I was also happy to see so many women and gay/lesbian representatives elected. I really would like to see Elizabeth Warren run in 2016. I am sure there are others that will make themselves known. I was glad to see more states ratify marriage equality and legalize marijuana. I don't smoke it, in fact I am allergic to it...but I don't think it poses any more of a threat than alcohol or tobacco or prescription drugs, so it should be legalized. Legalize it and tax the crap out of it. Good-bye to a large portion of the national debt I think. And don't even get me started on the whackadoodles that wanted to redefine rape or think that women can't and never do get pregnant as a result of rape. I mean, that's just revisionist claptrap wishful thinking any way you look at it. I class those clowns in the same category as the nutjob that just got sentenced to life in prison for shooting all those people, including Rep. Gabrielle Giffords in AZ. May they all take their place in that special hell their God has reserved for them.
I'm disturbed that Prop 37 did not pass in CA, but there will be another chance in two years at the mid-terms so we will see what happens. I will continue to raise awareness about GMO's and their dangers and hope that the momentum builds so that it passes when it comes up for a vote again. More energy will go into that in the coming months.
So, that's what I've been up to. This is how I process stuff. Lots of reflection, lots of internal stuff going on. But then, it's that time of year isn't it? I'm so grateful for so many things and so frustrated about others. This is how I work out my balance. This is how I reconcile myself to what must be, and figure out what I can change and what I must let go. Progress, no?
This is the latest skein:
Never let it be said that I don't listen to the prompting of Spirit. In yet another encounter, this one just a little more 'woo-worthy'...Robb and I did an Ancestor Rite last weekend at the UU Church. We had an awesome time with mostly new folks since the regular crowd were at a handfasting - I'm always confused at the number of people who wish to get married at Samhain - but to each their own. I would think one would want the blessing of the Gods at their wedding....and from Samhain to Yule...they are in the Underworld...so...anyway, to each their own as I said. We went ahead with the Ancestor Rite, and it was supposed to happen the way it did.
Earlier in the afternoon, Robb and I had gone to Ruby Tuesday for lunch. We got a 25% off coupon in the mail and thought...hey lunch! We come into the entryway of Ruby Tuesday, and there is this little old lady standing in there like she's waiting for someone. She has white hair, sunglasses and a blue sweater over a white shirt and dark pants. She asked us for the time. My phone was charging in the car, but Robb had his and gave her the time...12:12.
So we had our lunch and then made our way to the church and set up. Most of the people there were students of a Witchcraft and Religion class from UT, including the anthropology instructors. They were invited to bring pictures of loved ones to place on the altar and as I was looking at the pictures...one of an older couple, obviously an older picture, stood out for me. The lady in the picture very closely resembled the older lady that had asked us for the time earlier in the day. I called Robb over and showed him the picture and asked him if it reminded him of anyone. He immediately noted the resemblance of the woman in the picture to the woman that had asked us for the time. I made a mental note to ask who brought the picture after the rite.
After the rite, I asked who brought the picture of the couple. The class instructor's wife, stepped forward. I asked her if the date, December 12, or the numbers 12:12 meant anything to her. She gasped and said "That's my birthday!" I told her about the lady we met earlier in the day and the time and that she resembled the woman in the picture...who was her grandmother. She had desired to communicate with her grandparents, and we all felt like this was her grandmother making her presence known.
Having things like this happen is why we continue to do these things. There were other things that happened, things that meant something only to the people participating. I really believe that Ancestor Rites, whether it be to communicate once in a while or say good-bye or even hello, are important to the people who maintain emotional connections to those gone before them. Sometimes, just the act of saying good-bye is enough. Other times, it is important for people to speak of their loved ones, tell their stories, so that others will remember, and their loved ones are not forgotten and live on in the memories of those who hear their stories.
This time of year is usually difficult for me. This whole last year I have felt disconnected from that emotional pull of Samhain. I don't know if this means I have finally been released from whatever hold this time of year holds on me, or that I have become less sensitive or healed from past year's traumas, gods know there has been a history for me of holding on to things. I have five retrograde planets in my natal chart...I hold on to things too much sometimes, beating things to death thinking about them and examining them until I'm completely satisfied that I did the right thing at the time or have done the right thing since or whatever. I tend to hold on to things a lot longer than is probably necessary. I'm seeing a trend of letting go. I don't know if it's because I had so much ripped away over this period of time that I've 'learned' that it repeats itself and I need to let it go.
I haven't talked much at all about the death of my most recent familiar. Mojo was especially dear to me. I waited a long time to have another cat like him... a black male cat...I have had Lucifer, Aengus, Michah and Mojo...there have been others, females, who have worked with me, but the males have been the most memorable. I have some of his fur that I plan to spin with some bamboo to make either a keyfob or a bookmark. He has declined to work with me from the other side like Luna and Micah and Boo and Elektra do from time to time. Aengus and Lucifer don't really 'work' with me per se, but they make their presence known when I need comfort or just for company, I feel their weight on the bed beside me, or I feel soft fur slide past my leg or hear purring next to my ear. I think Mojo will be like them, his choice. Others bring messages, or confirm things for me from time to time. Once Luna fully manifested to me, following me up the driveway at our old house while I was on the phone with Trudy. I literally screeched into the phone it startled me so badly. It's quite something to turn around and see a full grown bobcat...let alone one that isn't there. She caused quite a stir the year I put her into the Ancestor's fire at FOS as well. People swore they saw her all over the park that night, to the point that people were convinced there was an ACTUAL bobcat roaming the campground. She follows me, she is not attached to the location where she lived, nor where she is buried, she stays with me. If you've never had an animal companion do that, I wish it for you, it's an awesome experience to say the least.
There has still been no progress on the work front. I was offered a part-time job of 10-15 hours at minimum wage..which I could not take because I could not afford the gas to get there on what I would have been paid. There was another possibility, which did not pan out, but I remain hopeful that I will find employment soon. I'm not looking for just anything. Part-time is fine if it pays enough or isn't too far away. I just need some money of my own. It says something about my conditioning that I don't value the work I do in keeping the house and taking care of the family, running the errands and playing taxi. Robb would most assuredly have to pay someone to do these things if I weren't here. I suppose it's a good thing room and board are included! But I find myself unable to concentrate for long periods, leaving things unfinished more often than usual. Scattered you might say. I'm sleeping fine, and I don't seem to be depressed because I'm still finding things to do, things to look forward to, so I don't think I'm depressed exactly.
There have been some great things happening, like the election for one. I'm not Obama's biggest fan, but I do think he's an honest, caring man, whose heart is in the right place. I kept looking at Romney, examining the facts about him, watching him, the way he interacted, the first hand accounts of people who had met and dealt with him. I found absolutely nothing to recommend him, nothing. I didn't even like looking at him, he actually made me physically ill. Emotional responses yes. But I listen to my gut, and when just looking at someone makes me sick, the last thing I am going to do is vote for them to be President. I can't even talk about Mr. Lyin' Ryan, Mr. Sanpaku eyes. He will die strangely, I believe. I don't know how, but it will come from outside him. Some craziness.
I don't know what the future holds for this country, but I know it's now a better future than it would have been had that man been elected. That's all I really want to say about the politics of the day. I felt pretty strongly about it, against one that is. I was also happy to see so many women and gay/lesbian representatives elected. I really would like to see Elizabeth Warren run in 2016. I am sure there are others that will make themselves known. I was glad to see more states ratify marriage equality and legalize marijuana. I don't smoke it, in fact I am allergic to it...but I don't think it poses any more of a threat than alcohol or tobacco or prescription drugs, so it should be legalized. Legalize it and tax the crap out of it. Good-bye to a large portion of the national debt I think. And don't even get me started on the whackadoodles that wanted to redefine rape or think that women can't and never do get pregnant as a result of rape. I mean, that's just revisionist claptrap wishful thinking any way you look at it. I class those clowns in the same category as the nutjob that just got sentenced to life in prison for shooting all those people, including Rep. Gabrielle Giffords in AZ. May they all take their place in that special hell their God has reserved for them.
I'm disturbed that Prop 37 did not pass in CA, but there will be another chance in two years at the mid-terms so we will see what happens. I will continue to raise awareness about GMO's and their dangers and hope that the momentum builds so that it passes when it comes up for a vote again. More energy will go into that in the coming months.
So, that's what I've been up to. This is how I process stuff. Lots of reflection, lots of internal stuff going on. But then, it's that time of year isn't it? I'm so grateful for so many things and so frustrated about others. This is how I work out my balance. This is how I reconcile myself to what must be, and figure out what I can change and what I must let go. Progress, no?