When Captain America bakes a mighty caaaaaake
I'm too lazy to host this pic in two places, so has a link to my latest baking endeavor.
AND NOW, finally, my RE: Mercs 3D review.
Gameplay
Fffffff this system was made for this game. Not the other way around. The analog slider thing is SO AWESOME and makes moving a breeze, and the button configuration and layout takes a HECK of a lot of hand-eye coordination to learn, but it works out very smoothly in the end. The touch screen weapons (plus the direction pad for quick-changes between guns/knives) is as ideal as it can be, imo, pretty much perfecting what RE5 already had down really well in its item menu. Not to mention that the reload-as-you-run is a GODSEND. The run-and-shoot is a little more awkward since you have to aim before you start moving, but it's good for when you're facing a miniboss and backing up while shooting.
The core of the gameplay itself transferred really well: kill as many enemies as possible within a time limit, making use of time and point bonuses. Admittedly, I find the difficulty -- generally speaking -- easier than it is in RE5; it's more along the lines of RE4, in which enemies have less health and combos are easier to maintain. Again, generally speaking; those EX levels are insane, and the Los Illuminados Ganados have ridiculously good stamina to the point where even Jill's ground melee doesn't always kill them, and I always thought her ground melee was the same strength as Chris'.
I love love love the option between FPV and TPV -- as much as I like the former, I switched it over to TPV and have left it like that since.
One constant complaint I've seen in reviews is that in order to get the highest score possible, you have to max out your time by finishing as many enemies as possible with melee attacks to get the time bonus -- resulting in monotonous gameplay. Personally, with each character's diverse arsenal of physical attacks, I kind of can't get tired of that; for me, that'd be like getting tired of the objective. HOW CAN YOU GET TIRED OF KILLING ENDLESS WAVES OF THINGS? I can't. That's primarily how I operated in RE5, so that's no issue for me.
The online co-op works insanely well. Lag can make enemies react too late, screw up melee attacks, or result in really funky animation glitches, but these are rare and don't detract from the game. I didn't get any lag at all when playing local co-op that I can remember.
One thing that does bug me on occasion is how the two-man melee combos don't always work on regular Majini/Ganados; if my partner sets up a combo by kicking an enemy, sometimes I'll go to continue the chain and won't get a prompt. :\ It happens both online and locally, so maybe it's a form of lag? Or a general glitch, idk.
Another negative point was the lack of a "partner radar" a la RE5; when my partner's suddenly put in a dying state, I find it difficult to pinpoint them by the map alone, resulting in a lot of frustrating mix-ups and run arounds that usually end in a game over.
Graphics
kljasdfjklsd. Awesome. Not the most clear-cut images ever, but I've seen few handheld games on par with it. The 3D works really well -- it's not overbearing, but I don't feel like I'm missing anything when I play it in 2D, either. The hi-res character arts, especially, are beautiful.
The frame rate spazzes from time to time, specifically when enemies are at a distance or there's significant lag, but it's nothing terrible, especially for a handheld.
Audio
...Meehhhh. :\ Handheld games' sound in general fail to impress me more often than not, but the audio's definitely the downside in this game. The music is wonderful; quick and upbeat, several of them recognizable from RE5. The voices, though, are where I get picky; R.C. Smith, Alyson Court, and D.C. Douglas stick out as always, but the other VAs are harder to pick out. Patricia Ja Lee is in the credits, but I couldn't (and honestly still can't) tell that it's her except for a couple grunting sounds. The voices, for the most part, are very low, easily lost in background music/noises, and come off very flat. I seriously thought Jill's VA could be her RE1 original one at first. :|; Still, that wasn't entirely a bad thing; I just laughed and thought "JUST LIKE OLD TIMES! :D" /forever the optimist, what Overall, the recording just sounds really awkward. Either the characters are screaming "THANKS!!!", like Jill and Claire, or they're muttering it like Wesker and barely audible (although it's quite IC, really, the way he goes, "...Thank you." and sounds very, very grumpy. |D).
Quality aside, I had mixed feelings about the voice clips. Nearly all of Wesker's grunts/pain sounds/attack sounds seem to be identical to those in RE5, but his actual sayings are different. Rather than the ever charming "I SUPPOSE I should thank you" or "It was in your BEST INTEREST to assist me!" we now have a simple "Thank you" and, in the case of being resuscitated, "Thank you for the help." The same goes for a couple other characters. I also miss the torn cries of the characters when their partner dies (or, in Wesker's case, "INCOMPETENCE!!"), and they no longer cry for help when they're grabbed, making it difficult to know when they need a hand.
Characters (AW YEAH THE FUN PART)
Chris -- ...Chris. ♥ I dig that pilot suit so hard I don't even and Jill-muse is getting creeped out by my obsession just a little. THAT ASIDE, I was glad to find I could transfer my basic Chris Strategy from RE5 to this game. Said strategy being PUNCH. EVERYTHING.
Jill -- HAY GURL HAY. You still have your Flip Kick, so I still love you. ...I joke. I admit that I snorted a bit at her simplistic profile: "Behind her beautiful looks lies a highly dependable soldier." I do think, Capcom, that this is the first time you've canonly stated that she's hot rather than leaving the players to figure that out. NGL, I was saddened by the lack of a battle suit and/or blonde!Jill -- putting me in the rare (and easygoing) minority, it seems -- BUT this game is not about looks so I don't hold that against it.
Wesker -- I find something hilariously pointless about OOH-ROH-BOOR-OHSSS Wesker using guns, but I love him, anyway. AND OH EM JEE his Mustang Kick was changed into an autokill! :DDD Except in the EX levels, but everyone's melee attacks suck in the EX levels. One questionable point was that when he resuscitates someone, he asks, "Are you okay?"
...
"Are you okay?"
Okay?
WESKER DOES NOT USE SLANG. For goodness' sake, he rarely uses contractions. It should have been "Are you all right?" ...or in the vein of RE5 Mercs, it should've been something more along the lines of "PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, YOU USELESS CRETIN."
Claire -- CLAIIIIIIIRE. lmao I love her so much. |D It took me a couple days, but I reached a startling conclusion: she fights like a dude. SERIOUSLY. No women in RE use their arms predominantly in attacks (excluding Excella's PIMPSLAP and Rebecca's little... face-push thing, but that's Excella and Rebecca.), but Claire is SO TOTALLY UP IN UR FAIS with punches, it's hilarious. Her Upper Combination is awfully reminiscent of Chris' ONE-TWO combo in the beginning of his Wesker-counter-move, her punch-punch-kick one totally looks like something Nii-san would've taught her in teenage years, her ground melee is an exact replica of Chris', and even her kicks are kind of guy-like. Her Neck Kick -- where she stomps on the back of the enemy's knee to put him on his knees, then slams a kick into the side of his neck -- is no exception, although I find it the most awesome of her arsenal. Her Double Shoot (I think it's called), however, looks a lot like Jill's Double Kick from RE5.
Rebecca -- You remain so cute, Becky. |3 I only wish they'd given you Billy's dogtags. 8[ The nurse ensemble is adorably hilarious.
Barry -- BARRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. \o/ I was sad that they took out his "I have THIS!" when he uses Miranda Rights, but he's still so insanely awesome that I'll forgive them.
HUNK -- ...Seriously. Could you be any more awesome? I think not. 8| <333
Krauser -- Krauserrrrrrr. I've missed you, man. Although you were in DSC, so... EH, WHATEVER I STILL MISSED THE PSYCHOTIC!YOU, even if your five-minute bromance with Leon was hilarious. I love your bow. I love your new moves. IDK wtf is up with your Gears of War alternate outfit, but you work it. Your taunt is the most awesome. Also, let me say that he and Jill make a hilariously and ironically excellent team. I kind of demand to see this in canon now. ...Oh, screw strikeouts -- I'm ficcing something on it now. /GOES AWAY TO BEGIN THIS
The Revelations Demo
Shortest. Demo. Ever, Capcom. XD SRSLY. Especially considering one of your largest selling points for Mercs was "IT INCLUDES A SUPER SPESHUL DEMO FOR REVELATIONS 8DDDD" But eh, whatever, the demo was just a bonus, and I actually didn't play it until... three or so days after I got the game? And I made the mistake of doing so at about 2:30 in the morning.
It scared. The crap out of me.
I SWEAR, all the little old school tricks -- rats jumping out, thunder in the distance, doors creaking, etc. -- all got to me. I honestly haven't felt that kind of nervous apprehension since RE0/1/CV. Mostly 1.
YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT, CAPCOM! \o/
Naturally, my first reaction upon spotting those two... B.O.W. things that appeared to be masturbating on the floor, wtfh is this GEE CAN'T WAIT TO READ ON WHAT THOSE THINGS ARE ABOUT IN A DISCARDED REPORT was to abruptly yelp, turn, and bolt for the door I came in once they saw me. Of course, upon finding the door locked, I gave in and unloaded my gun into those fugly things like nobody's business.
To my credit, I lost no health.
And thus my excitement for Revelations has evolved thus:
Event: Revelations is announced.
Me: :D
Event: First trailer.
Me: ...:O??
Event: Second trailer.
Me: 8O!! <3
Event: Demo.
Me: O_O;;; .... 8DDDDD ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
OVERALL -- Mercs: very, very awesome game. I'm getting my $40 worth, easily. There were a few nitpicky things that I didn't like *COUGH*wtfWeskerCOUGH* but it's a gameplay-centered game, so that's mostly what matters. The game had difficulty starting once -- to the point where I had to turn off the system and remove the cartridge and then insert it again -- and it entirely froze on me during an online match last night, again resulting in a manual reboot, but my sisters haven't had such problems with their copy, so mine could just be screwy or smth. If it does it again, I'll probably go back to Best Buy and trade it for another copy.
AND NOW, finally, my RE: Mercs 3D review.
Gameplay
Fffffff this system was made for this game. Not the other way around. The analog slider thing is SO AWESOME and makes moving a breeze, and the button configuration and layout takes a HECK of a lot of hand-eye coordination to learn, but it works out very smoothly in the end. The touch screen weapons (plus the direction pad for quick-changes between guns/knives) is as ideal as it can be, imo, pretty much perfecting what RE5 already had down really well in its item menu. Not to mention that the reload-as-you-run is a GODSEND. The run-and-shoot is a little more awkward since you have to aim before you start moving, but it's good for when you're facing a miniboss and backing up while shooting.
The core of the gameplay itself transferred really well: kill as many enemies as possible within a time limit, making use of time and point bonuses. Admittedly, I find the difficulty -- generally speaking -- easier than it is in RE5; it's more along the lines of RE4, in which enemies have less health and combos are easier to maintain. Again, generally speaking; those EX levels are insane, and the Los Illuminados Ganados have ridiculously good stamina to the point where even Jill's ground melee doesn't always kill them, and I always thought her ground melee was the same strength as Chris'.
I love love love the option between FPV and TPV -- as much as I like the former, I switched it over to TPV and have left it like that since.
One constant complaint I've seen in reviews is that in order to get the highest score possible, you have to max out your time by finishing as many enemies as possible with melee attacks to get the time bonus -- resulting in monotonous gameplay. Personally, with each character's diverse arsenal of physical attacks, I kind of can't get tired of that; for me, that'd be like getting tired of the objective. HOW CAN YOU GET TIRED OF KILLING ENDLESS WAVES OF THINGS? I can't. That's primarily how I operated in RE5, so that's no issue for me.
The online co-op works insanely well. Lag can make enemies react too late, screw up melee attacks, or result in really funky animation glitches, but these are rare and don't detract from the game. I didn't get any lag at all when playing local co-op that I can remember.
One thing that does bug me on occasion is how the two-man melee combos don't always work on regular Majini/Ganados; if my partner sets up a combo by kicking an enemy, sometimes I'll go to continue the chain and won't get a prompt. :\ It happens both online and locally, so maybe it's a form of lag? Or a general glitch, idk.
Another negative point was the lack of a "partner radar" a la RE5; when my partner's suddenly put in a dying state, I find it difficult to pinpoint them by the map alone, resulting in a lot of frustrating mix-ups and run arounds that usually end in a game over.
Graphics
kljasdfjklsd. Awesome. Not the most clear-cut images ever, but I've seen few handheld games on par with it. The 3D works really well -- it's not overbearing, but I don't feel like I'm missing anything when I play it in 2D, either. The hi-res character arts, especially, are beautiful.
The frame rate spazzes from time to time, specifically when enemies are at a distance or there's significant lag, but it's nothing terrible, especially for a handheld.
Audio
...Meehhhh. :\ Handheld games' sound in general fail to impress me more often than not, but the audio's definitely the downside in this game. The music is wonderful; quick and upbeat, several of them recognizable from RE5. The voices, though, are where I get picky; R.C. Smith, Alyson Court, and D.C. Douglas stick out as always, but the other VAs are harder to pick out. Patricia Ja Lee is in the credits, but I couldn't (and honestly still can't) tell that it's her except for a couple grunting sounds. The voices, for the most part, are very low, easily lost in background music/noises, and come off very flat. I seriously thought Jill's VA could be her RE1 original one at first. :|; Still, that wasn't entirely a bad thing; I just laughed and thought "JUST LIKE OLD TIMES! :D" /forever the optimist, what Overall, the recording just sounds really awkward. Either the characters are screaming "THANKS!!!", like Jill and Claire, or they're muttering it like Wesker and barely audible (although it's quite IC, really, the way he goes, "...Thank you." and sounds very, very grumpy. |D).
Quality aside, I had mixed feelings about the voice clips. Nearly all of Wesker's grunts/pain sounds/attack sounds seem to be identical to those in RE5, but his actual sayings are different. Rather than the ever charming "I SUPPOSE I should thank you" or "It was in your BEST INTEREST to assist me!" we now have a simple "Thank you" and, in the case of being resuscitated, "Thank you for the help." The same goes for a couple other characters. I also miss the torn cries of the characters when their partner dies (or, in Wesker's case, "INCOMPETENCE!!"), and they no longer cry for help when they're grabbed, making it difficult to know when they need a hand.
Characters (AW YEAH THE FUN PART)
Chris -- ...Chris. ♥ I dig that pilot suit so hard I don't even and Jill-muse is getting creeped out by my obsession just a little. THAT ASIDE, I was glad to find I could transfer my basic Chris Strategy from RE5 to this game. Said strategy being PUNCH. EVERYTHING.
Jill -- HAY GURL HAY. You still have your Flip Kick, so I still love you. ...I joke. I admit that I snorted a bit at her simplistic profile: "Behind her beautiful looks lies a highly dependable soldier." I do think, Capcom, that this is the first time you've canonly stated that she's hot rather than leaving the players to figure that out. NGL, I was saddened by the lack of a battle suit and/or blonde!Jill -- putting me in the rare (and easygoing) minority, it seems -- BUT this game is not about looks so I don't hold that against it.
Wesker -- I find something hilariously pointless about OOH-ROH-BOOR-OHSSS Wesker using guns, but I love him, anyway. AND OH EM JEE his Mustang Kick was changed into an autokill! :DDD Except in the EX levels, but everyone's melee attacks suck in the EX levels. One questionable point was that when he resuscitates someone, he asks, "Are you okay?"
...
"Are you okay?"
Okay?
WESKER DOES NOT USE SLANG. For goodness' sake, he rarely uses contractions. It should have been "Are you all right?" ...or in the vein of RE5 Mercs, it should've been something more along the lines of "PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, YOU USELESS CRETIN."
Claire -- CLAIIIIIIIRE. lmao I love her so much. |D It took me a couple days, but I reached a startling conclusion: she fights like a dude. SERIOUSLY. No women in RE use their arms predominantly in attacks (excluding Excella's PIMPSLAP and Rebecca's little... face-push thing, but that's Excella and Rebecca.), but Claire is SO TOTALLY UP IN UR FAIS with punches, it's hilarious. Her Upper Combination is awfully reminiscent of Chris' ONE-TWO combo in the beginning of his Wesker-counter-move, her punch-punch-kick one totally looks like something Nii-san would've taught her in teenage years, her ground melee is an exact replica of Chris', and even her kicks are kind of guy-like. Her Neck Kick -- where she stomps on the back of the enemy's knee to put him on his knees, then slams a kick into the side of his neck -- is no exception, although I find it the most awesome of her arsenal. Her Double Shoot (I think it's called), however, looks a lot like Jill's Double Kick from RE5.
Rebecca -- You remain so cute, Becky. |3 I only wish they'd given you Billy's dogtags. 8[ The nurse ensemble is adorably hilarious.
Barry -- BARRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. \o/ I was sad that they took out his "I have THIS!" when he uses Miranda Rights, but he's still so insanely awesome that I'll forgive them.
HUNK -- ...Seriously. Could you be any more awesome? I think not. 8| <333
Krauser -- Krauserrrrrrr. I've missed you, man. Although you were in DSC, so... EH, WHATEVER I STILL MISSED THE PSYCHOTIC!YOU, even if your five-minute bromance with Leon was hilarious. I love your bow. I love your new moves. IDK wtf is up with your Gears of War alternate outfit, but you work it. Your taunt is the most awesome. Also, let me say that he and Jill make a hilariously and ironically excellent team. I kind of demand to see this in canon now. ...Oh, screw strikeouts -- I'm ficcing something on it now. /GOES AWAY TO BEGIN THIS
The Revelations Demo
Shortest. Demo. Ever, Capcom. XD SRSLY. Especially considering one of your largest selling points for Mercs was "IT INCLUDES A SUPER SPESHUL DEMO FOR REVELATIONS 8DDDD" But eh, whatever, the demo was just a bonus, and I actually didn't play it until... three or so days after I got the game? And I made the mistake of doing so at about 2:30 in the morning.
It scared. The crap out of me.
I SWEAR, all the little old school tricks -- rats jumping out, thunder in the distance, doors creaking, etc. -- all got to me. I honestly haven't felt that kind of nervous apprehension since RE0/1/CV. Mostly 1.
YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT, CAPCOM! \o/
Naturally, my first reaction upon spotting those two... B.O.W. things that appeared to be masturbating on the floor, wtfh is this GEE CAN'T WAIT TO READ ON WHAT THOSE THINGS ARE ABOUT IN A DISCARDED REPORT was to abruptly yelp, turn, and bolt for the door I came in once they saw me. Of course, upon finding the door locked, I gave in and unloaded my gun into those fugly things like nobody's business.
To my credit, I lost no health.
And thus my excitement for Revelations has evolved thus:
Event: Revelations is announced.
Me: :D
Event: First trailer.
Me: ...:O??
Event: Second trailer.
Me: 8O!! <3
Event: Demo.
Me: O_O;;; .... 8DDDDD ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
OVERALL -- Mercs: very, very awesome game. I'm getting my $40 worth, easily. There were a few nitpicky things that I didn't like *COUGH*wtfWeskerCOUGH* but it's a gameplay-centered game, so that's mostly what matters. The game had difficulty starting once -- to the point where I had to turn off the system and remove the cartridge and then insert it again -- and it entirely froze on me during an online match last night, again resulting in a manual reboot, but my sisters haven't had such problems with their copy, so mine could just be screwy or smth. If it does it again, I'll probably go back to Best Buy and trade it for another copy.