how close is close enough?
"That's how society is gonna see you, you know?" Mother dearest said. With a frown on my face, i replied with "Oh, so thats a good enough reason for my brother to hate me? I mean not everyone is narrow-minded like you are." Mom just looked at me and left the room.
All I can say is, why can't ANYONE be happy for me now that i am happy? Everyone does judge on looks, but why can't 'society' dwell on a person's character rather than their race. I will be the first to admit that yes, i have been racist at times.. Just jokingly to make people laugh.. & it was for all the wrong reasons.. & in the past months i have met some of most kind, funny, and entertaining people and they just so happened to be a different race.
In the past month I met a super sweet guy named cay, & he is seriously the most sweet guy that i have come across. He treats me with respect, makes me smile to the point where i am squinting my eyes so much that you can't see them, makes me feel special & has goals and aspirations in life.
But wait, he's black??
No black man is like that....
Everyone of my friends can tell you, absolutley no white guy i have been with has treated me like this. NONE.
So, would it be better if i was dating a white guy with no job, does drugs, treats me disrespectively & does not care for me at all?
Would 'society' judge me differently?
Would they see that i was unhappy?
Would i fit in more?
Would my brother and mom accept that?
I don't know how you would answer these questions, but i do know that i would rather be happy with a black man who has everything i could ever want in a boyfriend than a white man who has absolutely nothing for a future except for treating me like shit...
While i am taking in all these thoughts from my mom and the glares that my brother gives me, i sit & wonder why they can't see that i have finally found someone who really does care for me...
All I can say is, why can't ANYONE be happy for me now that i am happy? Everyone does judge on looks, but why can't 'society' dwell on a person's character rather than their race. I will be the first to admit that yes, i have been racist at times.. Just jokingly to make people laugh.. & it was for all the wrong reasons.. & in the past months i have met some of most kind, funny, and entertaining people and they just so happened to be a different race.
In the past month I met a super sweet guy named cay, & he is seriously the most sweet guy that i have come across. He treats me with respect, makes me smile to the point where i am squinting my eyes so much that you can't see them, makes me feel special & has goals and aspirations in life.
But wait, he's black??
No black man is like that....
Everyone of my friends can tell you, absolutley no white guy i have been with has treated me like this. NONE.
So, would it be better if i was dating a white guy with no job, does drugs, treats me disrespectively & does not care for me at all?
Would 'society' judge me differently?
Would they see that i was unhappy?
Would i fit in more?
Would my brother and mom accept that?
I don't know how you would answer these questions, but i do know that i would rather be happy with a black man who has everything i could ever want in a boyfriend than a white man who has absolutely nothing for a future except for treating me like shit...
While i am taking in all these thoughts from my mom and the glares that my brother gives me, i sit & wonder why they can't see that i have finally found someone who really does care for me...