(no subject)
Greetings earth creatures, and welcome to another exciting edition of a bulletin I'm posting.
In today's episode as usual, we'll be looking at everybody's favourite subject - me!
On Monday and Tuesday Peter went to Dave, the creator of a TV show called Control Freaks (http://www.control-freaks.tv) and started his exciting new job. On Monday over a period of 7 hours, Peter played lots of games, including the not yet released Tekken 5! After recording footage of playing this exciting new game from Namco, Peter then wrote a review that will be read out on TV when it's put to air! The next day Peter did a lot of the same thing, over the two days getting paid 150 dollars... for playing games!
Tuesday night Peter kicked some ass on the indoor soccer pitch, winning 5 - 0 against some chumps who were humbled by his teams presence (The Dorrinda Haffners).
Yesterday Peter applied for many different jobs, including a kids party company, that is to say a company that goes to kids houses and entertains them! Peter sent this application to the nice lady who owns the company;
Greetings Kate,
My name is Peter Ellis, I’m a very eccentric, extraverted, loud, and well, not to butter my own bread, but let’s face it, funny as a supermarket placing specials that save you 8 cents (c’mon, doesn’t that seem a little funny to you? Obviously not funny haha funny, more funny peculiar. What are they thinking? Everyone always checks the price first, if I offered you a tin of some substandard shaving cream for 8 cents less than it’s normal price would you take it instead of your usual shaving gel in a lovely can that costs a reasonable 87 cents more than the normal price of the substandard cream? I think not…. Not that I’m bitter)
Now, on to the application.
· Why are you so excited about this role?
I LOVE looking after kids and playing with kids, they’re so imaginative and eager for anything, do you know how many of my friends would go for an impromptu peanut butter eating competition?! I can count them using one hand! And yet bring this idea to a team of highly trained peanut-butter loving 8 year olds and bingo bango you’ve got yourself a challenge on your hands! I LOVE roleplaying and creative thinking (my other job is writing scripted reviews for a video game TV show), there’s nothing I love more than a good old fashioned fancy dress party. Newfangled fancy dress party’s are good too though. A job where I can actually embrace my creative side and actually voice it and act it as well is actually an idea that seems almost too good to be true.
· Why will WE be so excited to have you in this role?
Because I’m made for this role! Entertaining kids is possibly the best thing of all time in my eyes and it’s eagerness, enthusiasm and the ability to be able to capture kids attention that you’re looking for, I have all of those things. I’m also free to work as many hours as you want me to. I’m a very good writer, both in both a creative and formal sense, this also reflects on my abilities as a speaker, I can be very creative and extraverted when needed and also very professional when it’s called for. If you’d like to see some of my writing I’m more than willing to show you some of this.
· What did you hate about your previous jobs?
I HATED the monotonous atmosphere of a supermarket where I stacked shelves and served customer after customer. I used to do PA calls for chickens we had to get rid of and did all these stupid calls, and whilst I said it was to sell lots of chickens (P.S. Mission accomplished!) it was actually to make all my coworkers laugh. I hate how bosses yelled at me for not working faster, when we all knew as well as each other that they did it to everybody to keep them on their toes, actually lowering morale and decreasing work output. (again, not that I’m bitter) I hated how to talk to your coworkers and be friends with people was frowned upon, I actually was told by my store manager that “We’re not here to make friends!!!”. And funnily enough he never did.
· What would you do to get the attention of a group of 15 screaming 7 year old boys? (yes -its a tricky one but have a go!)
Well I can do a fairly good range of accents… It would really depend on what I was… As a posh butler (mastery of the queen’s English with snobbery is always fun) the prospect of much in the way of candied confectionary, if I could tempt sirs with a game of *insert game here*. And when one of them did well I’d shout “Bravo sir!”. As a pirate I could tempt them into a tr-eeeeee-shore hunt for my hidden chest of dabloons! Or possibly a hunt for those blasted skeletons that have been holding mi mates hostage! As a british rocker (ala Billy Idol maybe?) a few yells of “WHO WANTS TO ROCK!?!” followed by some mad air-guitar skills with a faithful boom box or something of that description assisting me… and thus the illusion would be complete. There really are a range of possibilities, just finding a way to offer kids something that they want, or something that will entertain them and so on and so forth.
· Anything else you think we should know?
The only thing I think you should know is;
I can’t work on Monday’s or Tuesday’s, I don’t know if that’s a problem.
I won’t be able to drive myself until September the 3rd (I was a lazy man when it came to driving! Judge me not!) I WILL find ways of being able to get places however, if it is required of me, I’m not really sure how transport works…
My birthdate is the 2nd of October, 1987, making me only 17, however if it makes me sound better, you could say that I’m ‘just south of 18’?
I’m available, outside of Monday’s and Tuesday’s WHENEVER you want me and I’ll work as much as I’m allowed to.
By next Friday I’ll be living in my own place in Stirling with 2 housemates, this dude Marty, 24, who’s in his last year of learning Teaching at Flinders University. And Katye, 18, who I don’t remember what she does. But they’re both good friends of mine and really very lovely… I’m not entirely sure why I’m writing this, but it’s too late now.
My number is 0422 418 296.
I can’t really think of anything else right now… Feel free to ask me anything about anything though.
I REALLY hope to hear from you soon.
Then he got THIS response!
Well, well Mr Peter Ellis - that has got to be the most interesting (if not downright scary) application i have ever received! Luckily for you, I am somewhat of a nutter myself (yes I AM replying at 11:03pm) and it is a definate requirement in this job. I will call you tomorrow and hopefully with you being available "WHENEVER" - we can meet up for a coffee and chat about this crazy job I have and whether you might just be crazy enough to fill it.
Kate Fisher
Groovy Chics and Pirate Ships
Making Peter the single greatest man to have ever lived!
Bye kids.
In today's episode as usual, we'll be looking at everybody's favourite subject - me!
On Monday and Tuesday Peter went to Dave, the creator of a TV show called Control Freaks (http://www.control-freaks.tv) and started his exciting new job. On Monday over a period of 7 hours, Peter played lots of games, including the not yet released Tekken 5! After recording footage of playing this exciting new game from Namco, Peter then wrote a review that will be read out on TV when it's put to air! The next day Peter did a lot of the same thing, over the two days getting paid 150 dollars... for playing games!
Tuesday night Peter kicked some ass on the indoor soccer pitch, winning 5 - 0 against some chumps who were humbled by his teams presence (The Dorrinda Haffners).
Yesterday Peter applied for many different jobs, including a kids party company, that is to say a company that goes to kids houses and entertains them! Peter sent this application to the nice lady who owns the company;
Greetings Kate,
My name is Peter Ellis, I’m a very eccentric, extraverted, loud, and well, not to butter my own bread, but let’s face it, funny as a supermarket placing specials that save you 8 cents (c’mon, doesn’t that seem a little funny to you? Obviously not funny haha funny, more funny peculiar. What are they thinking? Everyone always checks the price first, if I offered you a tin of some substandard shaving cream for 8 cents less than it’s normal price would you take it instead of your usual shaving gel in a lovely can that costs a reasonable 87 cents more than the normal price of the substandard cream? I think not…. Not that I’m bitter)
Now, on to the application.
· Why are you so excited about this role?
I LOVE looking after kids and playing with kids, they’re so imaginative and eager for anything, do you know how many of my friends would go for an impromptu peanut butter eating competition?! I can count them using one hand! And yet bring this idea to a team of highly trained peanut-butter loving 8 year olds and bingo bango you’ve got yourself a challenge on your hands! I LOVE roleplaying and creative thinking (my other job is writing scripted reviews for a video game TV show), there’s nothing I love more than a good old fashioned fancy dress party. Newfangled fancy dress party’s are good too though. A job where I can actually embrace my creative side and actually voice it and act it as well is actually an idea that seems almost too good to be true.
· Why will WE be so excited to have you in this role?
Because I’m made for this role! Entertaining kids is possibly the best thing of all time in my eyes and it’s eagerness, enthusiasm and the ability to be able to capture kids attention that you’re looking for, I have all of those things. I’m also free to work as many hours as you want me to. I’m a very good writer, both in both a creative and formal sense, this also reflects on my abilities as a speaker, I can be very creative and extraverted when needed and also very professional when it’s called for. If you’d like to see some of my writing I’m more than willing to show you some of this.
· What did you hate about your previous jobs?
I HATED the monotonous atmosphere of a supermarket where I stacked shelves and served customer after customer. I used to do PA calls for chickens we had to get rid of and did all these stupid calls, and whilst I said it was to sell lots of chickens (P.S. Mission accomplished!) it was actually to make all my coworkers laugh. I hate how bosses yelled at me for not working faster, when we all knew as well as each other that they did it to everybody to keep them on their toes, actually lowering morale and decreasing work output. (again, not that I’m bitter) I hated how to talk to your coworkers and be friends with people was frowned upon, I actually was told by my store manager that “We’re not here to make friends!!!”. And funnily enough he never did.
· What would you do to get the attention of a group of 15 screaming 7 year old boys? (yes -its a tricky one but have a go!)
Well I can do a fairly good range of accents… It would really depend on what I was… As a posh butler (mastery of the queen’s English with snobbery is always fun) the prospect of much in the way of candied confectionary, if I could tempt sirs with a game of *insert game here*. And when one of them did well I’d shout “Bravo sir!”. As a pirate I could tempt them into a tr-eeeeee-shore hunt for my hidden chest of dabloons! Or possibly a hunt for those blasted skeletons that have been holding mi mates hostage! As a british rocker (ala Billy Idol maybe?) a few yells of “WHO WANTS TO ROCK!?!” followed by some mad air-guitar skills with a faithful boom box or something of that description assisting me… and thus the illusion would be complete. There really are a range of possibilities, just finding a way to offer kids something that they want, or something that will entertain them and so on and so forth.
· Anything else you think we should know?
The only thing I think you should know is;
I can’t work on Monday’s or Tuesday’s, I don’t know if that’s a problem.
I won’t be able to drive myself until September the 3rd (I was a lazy man when it came to driving! Judge me not!) I WILL find ways of being able to get places however, if it is required of me, I’m not really sure how transport works…
My birthdate is the 2nd of October, 1987, making me only 17, however if it makes me sound better, you could say that I’m ‘just south of 18’?
I’m available, outside of Monday’s and Tuesday’s WHENEVER you want me and I’ll work as much as I’m allowed to.
By next Friday I’ll be living in my own place in Stirling with 2 housemates, this dude Marty, 24, who’s in his last year of learning Teaching at Flinders University. And Katye, 18, who I don’t remember what she does. But they’re both good friends of mine and really very lovely… I’m not entirely sure why I’m writing this, but it’s too late now.
My number is 0422 418 296.
I can’t really think of anything else right now… Feel free to ask me anything about anything though.
I REALLY hope to hear from you soon.
Then he got THIS response!
Well, well Mr Peter Ellis - that has got to be the most interesting (if not downright scary) application i have ever received! Luckily for you, I am somewhat of a nutter myself (yes I AM replying at 11:03pm) and it is a definate requirement in this job. I will call you tomorrow and hopefully with you being available "WHENEVER" - we can meet up for a coffee and chat about this crazy job I have and whether you might just be crazy enough to fill it.
Kate Fisher
Groovy Chics and Pirate Ships
Making Peter the single greatest man to have ever lived!
Bye kids.