Prov 29 / Family Values
Title: The Lord's Eye Be Upon You
Author: Salome-sensei
Words: 500
Rating: PG13
Characters: Naraku POV
Genre: AU Crackfic
Summary: Naraku finds a way up the well and becomes a televangelist.
Warnings: Ridicule of televangelism...which is like shooting fish in a barrel, honestly.
Reverend Naraku stands at his podium, impeccable in his purple silk suit, slicked black hair tied tightly back, teeth bleached and eyes sparkling. He looks out over the crowd of thousands in the recently-built Shikon Revival Tabernacle in Savannah, Georgia. Instead of a trinity, he celebrates a four-part divinity that includes himself. Tens of thousands flock to his sermons weekly, and perhaps millions watch him on television. They donate their devotion and most of all their money to his cause of bringing the Lord's word to the masses. The diamonds glint upon his fingers; gold sparkles from the furnishings on his altar-stage. He smiles possessively over all. And if there is a glint of red in his gaze? It is surely the reflection of the on-air beacon overhead, signaling the start of his sermon.
"The Lord's eye be upon you!" he shouts, thinking of himself while his audience thinks their own thoughts. "I have a very special message for you today, fellow lovers of the Lord. Today, I shall speak of my humble beginnings. The days before I sprang from the well of despair, from a futile era of my life into the light of grace!"
Awed murmuring ripples through the auditorium as a second and third camera pan for close-ups of faces full of emotion and the need for salvation.
"My friends, I was once a sinner, just like you. Yes, I was. Grotesque and feeble, greedy and lustful for power. I say lustful. I did wrong to those who served me even as I held their very hearts in the palm of my hand! I was low, fellow sinners, low." He bounces on his toes in his patent leather shoes. "I was hell itself."
He retrieves a lavender handkerchief and dabs his moistening forehead. "And I lashed out, lo, as though with tentacles made of sin, to harm to any who dared intervene. But I have learned, my friends, I have learned. And would you like to know what I have learned?"
A horde of affirmative expressions rise in accord.
"I have learned, most loving believers here-and all watching through the magic of television, internet, and podcast-that we are all, in a word, family. And I like to think of myself as your father. I long to be your humble leader and guide. To earn your love as I bring you the word of the Lord. Like the father of the family, I guide and you follow, giving me the generous gifts of your love and devotion, and I offer it up to the Lord. O, let me be your father. Let me be Papa Naraku, who gives you so much more than any fleshly love can provide." He says this last with obvious disdain for the flesh, and turns away a moment as if to wipe tears, smirking triumphantly as he basks in the deafening applause…and the money that will not doubt soon roll in and buy him that castle in Kyoto he's been admiring.
~
Author: Salome-sensei
Words: 500
Rating: PG13
Characters: Naraku POV
Genre: AU Crackfic
Summary: Naraku finds a way up the well and becomes a televangelist.
Warnings: Ridicule of televangelism...which is like shooting fish in a barrel, honestly.
Reverend Naraku stands at his podium, impeccable in his purple silk suit, slicked black hair tied tightly back, teeth bleached and eyes sparkling. He looks out over the crowd of thousands in the recently-built Shikon Revival Tabernacle in Savannah, Georgia. Instead of a trinity, he celebrates a four-part divinity that includes himself. Tens of thousands flock to his sermons weekly, and perhaps millions watch him on television. They donate their devotion and most of all their money to his cause of bringing the Lord's word to the masses. The diamonds glint upon his fingers; gold sparkles from the furnishings on his altar-stage. He smiles possessively over all. And if there is a glint of red in his gaze? It is surely the reflection of the on-air beacon overhead, signaling the start of his sermon.
"The Lord's eye be upon you!" he shouts, thinking of himself while his audience thinks their own thoughts. "I have a very special message for you today, fellow lovers of the Lord. Today, I shall speak of my humble beginnings. The days before I sprang from the well of despair, from a futile era of my life into the light of grace!"
Awed murmuring ripples through the auditorium as a second and third camera pan for close-ups of faces full of emotion and the need for salvation.
"My friends, I was once a sinner, just like you. Yes, I was. Grotesque and feeble, greedy and lustful for power. I say lustful. I did wrong to those who served me even as I held their very hearts in the palm of my hand! I was low, fellow sinners, low." He bounces on his toes in his patent leather shoes. "I was hell itself."
He retrieves a lavender handkerchief and dabs his moistening forehead. "And I lashed out, lo, as though with tentacles made of sin, to harm to any who dared intervene. But I have learned, my friends, I have learned. And would you like to know what I have learned?"
A horde of affirmative expressions rise in accord.
"I have learned, most loving believers here-and all watching through the magic of television, internet, and podcast-that we are all, in a word, family. And I like to think of myself as your father. I long to be your humble leader and guide. To earn your love as I bring you the word of the Lord. Like the father of the family, I guide and you follow, giving me the generous gifts of your love and devotion, and I offer it up to the Lord. O, let me be your father. Let me be Papa Naraku, who gives you so much more than any fleshly love can provide." He says this last with obvious disdain for the flesh, and turns away a moment as if to wipe tears, smirking triumphantly as he basks in the deafening applause…and the money that will not doubt soon roll in and buy him that castle in Kyoto he's been admiring.
~