back at it
Being back at Goddard feels great. There's something to be said about being in the middle of nowhere and I've felt more at peace and happier here than I've felt in months. I'm busy, I'm productive, and all of the concerns and anxieties that have plagued me have dissipated to all but nothing. I wake up early. I talk to people and I get inspired. I lay on the grass and remember how much I love the feeling of the sun on my face. I've napped, I've been able to relax. I've done enough yoga to confirm I still don't like it. I've had amazing conversations with extraordinary people. I've never felt more confident personally and professionally. I'm way ahead of myself as far as academics go, so I'm free to enjoy the seminars and workshops as I please and make actual choices in regards to what I'm going to/not going to attend.
I can't explain what happens here, and you'll never understand unless you're a part. I look forward to coming here like I used to look forward to coming to summer camp. I know it's going to surface, the fact that I have to leave this place and merge back into what has become of my real life. It's ideal. There is indeed, something special that happens here that most people will not understand. Every time I try to explain it, it becomes minimized. We become each others everything for eight days, and we fall apart together; it's all part of the process. We become better people for it, and we will be better therapists for it. I went to graduation today and the entire thing reinforced exactly why I am here, and made me want to be the person at the podium more than anything. I even thought about what my closing remarks would be; it's still two years off - what is my thesis going to focus on, who am I going to thank?
What is my life going to look like when I graduate? It's already been flipped around upside down and I'm not sure how I am going to handle what is ahead of me, let alone what will things look like one residency from now, or two?
I can't explain what happens here, and you'll never understand unless you're a part. I look forward to coming here like I used to look forward to coming to summer camp. I know it's going to surface, the fact that I have to leave this place and merge back into what has become of my real life. It's ideal. There is indeed, something special that happens here that most people will not understand. Every time I try to explain it, it becomes minimized. We become each others everything for eight days, and we fall apart together; it's all part of the process. We become better people for it, and we will be better therapists for it. I went to graduation today and the entire thing reinforced exactly why I am here, and made me want to be the person at the podium more than anything. I even thought about what my closing remarks would be; it's still two years off - what is my thesis going to focus on, who am I going to thank?
What is my life going to look like when I graduate? It's already been flipped around upside down and I'm not sure how I am going to handle what is ahead of me, let alone what will things look like one residency from now, or two?