You are my sunshine

[innocuous_prism]

Andy can date any girl he wants, but very few of them ever make it past the point of recieving my utmost approval. Not that my opinions matter much, I just want to see him happy. Lora is a really nice girl, I'm relieved that he ended up with her as opposed to some of the other people he's been seeing lately. Yesterday when he called her little buddy, it felt like a piece of me died. I know that I could never be "the one", but it kills me to know he'd use that nickname on someone else so quickly. Despite everything I was feeling, I IMed him and said something along the lines of "I'm so glad to see you happy with someone for once, you deserve nothing but the best and it's great that you've finally found something worth smiling about..." I wish I would've saved the conversation, but I xed out. He thanked me for the kind words and told Lora everything I said. I IMed her and explained to her that for one reason or another I never felt the same, but I've always wanted the best for him and I see that she's already making him very happy. A tear fell down my cheek, and it was like waterworks from there. Every now and then I think about the days when he'd pick me up from school ... Emily looked at him as if he was some kind of freak, but little did she know ... he meant the world to me. I think back to the time when we went to the Canfield fair and he forgot where he parked the racecar, we must've walked a mile through the field until we finally found it, but I didn't hold it against him, instead I laughed my ass off. I think about 243 when we first met, and how I continually chased away the 13 year olds that flocked in his direction. Glancing at a bottle of Grape Gatorade still makes me giggle because I imagine that it's filled 3/4 of the way with Vodka. There isn't one other person I can think of that turns heads when he enters a room. All he has to say is "HEYYY" or "IT'S BIG ANDY, BITCH" and voila, it's a party. I can't think of any other guy that can call me a bitch or tell me to shut the fuck up without pissing me off. I'll never get in the car with anyone who's been drinking, except for Andy ... he can be 3 sheets to the wind and I still trust him every bit as much as if he were sober. My parents treat him like a son, and he knows he can call here whenever he needs something because there's always someone here to listen. It used to make me mad that he was so persistant with me, but now I know he's the only one who ever loved me like a good boyfriend should. I worry more about him than I worry about myself or anyone else in my life, his habits leave much to be desired but I know the reasons why he drinks. In fact ... I know more than most people probably ever will and for as long as I live I will keep it that way. I credit him as being one of those few special people who have made me who I am today, and I really don't think he knows just how amazing he is and always will be. For a while I thought I was going to lose his friendship for good, but all of those arguments we've had and the struggles we've been through in an effort to make things work no longer matter because everything has worked out for the best.

You Are My Sunshine
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are grey.
You'll never know, dear,
How much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away.

Love you, bro.