(no subject)
Ah, writing. Both the bane and salvation of my existence. It lets me sleep easily at night, and it gives me stabbing chest pains.
Okay, so this thingy that I'm writing, I wrote it for Nanowrimo last year. I had just been laid off from eBay that October. I previously had done Nanowrimo back in 2001, but I had not achieved the 50,000 words in one month goal. I thought this was a perfect opportunity to try again. I had nothing but time, and I really needed something to take my mind off of my situation.
The problem was that I had no ideas for a story, other than the one I had begun 9 years earlier. I didn't want to resurrect that thing, not yet anyway. I had a couple vague ideas that weren't really a plot, but just little pieces of background. I figured it would be enough. So I just started writing, with absolutely no idea what was happening. I made it up as I went along, and it was fun. I eventually wrote 66,000 words or so, making it a nice little novella.
Along the way I got attached to the story and characters, and I really wanted to flesh them out. And that's what I've been doing now for the past 8 months. I should be done, but I'm just a slow writer. I've got about 55K words of it done, out of maybe 150K that I have outlined. So just over a third of the way there. At this rate, it will take another year and a half. Though in my defense, I didn't really start on it til April.
Writing a novel is such a mix of skills, all of which need to be mastered. Character, plot and pacing, themes, prose, other stuff I can't think of right now, these things have nothing to do with each other. I could perhaps think of the most amazingly well rounded complex characters, weave them into profound themes, and then have the whole thing fall apart because I can't write prose worth a shit.
Actually, that's pretty close to where I am. My prose is utilitarian at best. It improves upon successive rewrites, but not by much. That's not my main concern though. I'm confident that with enough practice the prose will improve.
It's the damn plotting that's killing me. I know what happens; it's just the stuff in between that I'm struggling with. For instance, if I'm at A and I want to get to D, that means I have to write B and C as well. Well B and C are boring, don't interest me, and I frankly don't want to write about them. How do I jump from A to D? Is a little flashback at the beginning of D enough to address B and C? If so, how often can I get away with that? I like beginnings and endings. I don't like middles.
Then there's the fact that everything I write somehow comes out really dry, with none of my personality in it. I don't know why I'm having such a hard time writing more loosely, just letting it flow. It's all so overworked. And, frankly, boring. I think I'm being too self-conscious. Too worried about what potential readers will think. And that is just stupid. I don't have any readers. I'm writing for myself right now. I just need to keep that in mind.
Sometimes I think that working in CS for 6 years ruined my prose. I always had to write in a clear, concise manner. Short sentences, numbered instructions. I guess CS is like technical writing.
Then I remind myself that my prose, fiction anyway, sucked before I got that job. So really no big lose.
For now my goal is to just write it as I have it outlined, then I can worry about what needs to be added, taken out, rewritten, burned and buried under concrete, etc. after I have a completed draft. To that end, I'm erring on the side of writing too much. I may have to prune a bunch out later. I mention that because the scene I wrote today is exceptionally boring. My imagination seems to have abandoned me. I may need to skip a few days of writing to focus on reworking the outline.
Now I have one of those chest pains I mentioned above. Lovely. I think it's time for bed. I will sleep easily knowing I wrote my 1000 words tonight.
Okay, so this thingy that I'm writing, I wrote it for Nanowrimo last year. I had just been laid off from eBay that October. I previously had done Nanowrimo back in 2001, but I had not achieved the 50,000 words in one month goal. I thought this was a perfect opportunity to try again. I had nothing but time, and I really needed something to take my mind off of my situation.
The problem was that I had no ideas for a story, other than the one I had begun 9 years earlier. I didn't want to resurrect that thing, not yet anyway. I had a couple vague ideas that weren't really a plot, but just little pieces of background. I figured it would be enough. So I just started writing, with absolutely no idea what was happening. I made it up as I went along, and it was fun. I eventually wrote 66,000 words or so, making it a nice little novella.
Along the way I got attached to the story and characters, and I really wanted to flesh them out. And that's what I've been doing now for the past 8 months. I should be done, but I'm just a slow writer. I've got about 55K words of it done, out of maybe 150K that I have outlined. So just over a third of the way there. At this rate, it will take another year and a half. Though in my defense, I didn't really start on it til April.
Writing a novel is such a mix of skills, all of which need to be mastered. Character, plot and pacing, themes, prose, other stuff I can't think of right now, these things have nothing to do with each other. I could perhaps think of the most amazingly well rounded complex characters, weave them into profound themes, and then have the whole thing fall apart because I can't write prose worth a shit.
Actually, that's pretty close to where I am. My prose is utilitarian at best. It improves upon successive rewrites, but not by much. That's not my main concern though. I'm confident that with enough practice the prose will improve.
It's the damn plotting that's killing me. I know what happens; it's just the stuff in between that I'm struggling with. For instance, if I'm at A and I want to get to D, that means I have to write B and C as well. Well B and C are boring, don't interest me, and I frankly don't want to write about them. How do I jump from A to D? Is a little flashback at the beginning of D enough to address B and C? If so, how often can I get away with that? I like beginnings and endings. I don't like middles.
Then there's the fact that everything I write somehow comes out really dry, with none of my personality in it. I don't know why I'm having such a hard time writing more loosely, just letting it flow. It's all so overworked. And, frankly, boring. I think I'm being too self-conscious. Too worried about what potential readers will think. And that is just stupid. I don't have any readers. I'm writing for myself right now. I just need to keep that in mind.
Sometimes I think that working in CS for 6 years ruined my prose. I always had to write in a clear, concise manner. Short sentences, numbered instructions. I guess CS is like technical writing.
Then I remind myself that my prose, fiction anyway, sucked before I got that job. So really no big lose.
For now my goal is to just write it as I have it outlined, then I can worry about what needs to be added, taken out, rewritten, burned and buried under concrete, etc. after I have a completed draft. To that end, I'm erring on the side of writing too much. I may have to prune a bunch out later. I mention that because the scene I wrote today is exceptionally boring. My imagination seems to have abandoned me. I may need to skip a few days of writing to focus on reworking the outline.
Now I have one of those chest pains I mentioned above. Lovely. I think it's time for bed. I will sleep easily knowing I wrote my 1000 words tonight.