Mar 19, 2006 01:47
Well spring break is over, and now its back to the hell that is school. I had a good time visiting Bruce I missed him so much, I need to see him and kiss his face and wake up next to him, I just hated having to leave him, it never gets any easier. Though I missed leaving him I did not miss leaving Colorado, as beautiful as it is there, I just can't see myself living there, or ever being able to get a real job. Colorado just doesn't feel like home to me, and I'm not happy there, and he's not happy in Michigan so I have about 4 months to find us a new state to live in that we both love, and find a home and jobs, and I'm trying to finish school, I'm so overwhelmed and stressed out I just want to slip into a coma sometimes and wake up when all this shit is over with.
School sucks, I'm kicking ass in all of my classes but its sucking the life out of me, I honestly feel like an alcoholic sometimes, in fact I wish I had a beer right now. I just want school to be over with, I have to take 13 credits after this semester to graduate and be done so I'm taking them ALL in the fist 6 week summer session. To make matters worse because of low enrollment fucking CMU keeps canceling the classes I'm signed up for, so I have to keep registering fro new ones and fitting them into my schedule, just to have them canceled again - I think I'm gonna fucking scream.
I don't have a place to live for the summer. Krissy and I were going to live together to lessen the cost, but now she might not even stay up here, so I don't know what I'm going to do, I think I can get an extension on my current lease for an extra month, but it will cost like $1000, that's bullshit. So that's one more thing to add to my plate of things that are stressing me out and pissing me off.
I wish I could close my eyes and wake up and have it be July - sunny, warm, done with school, with my man for more then a week for the first time in almost a year, have a job, and a place to call home, and finally be able to breath and relax and be happy, that's all I want right now.