find me a saint † dramadramaduck application
Player nickname: Brandon
Player LJ: wayitcomes
Way to contact you:
Email: such.a.heart[at]gmail[dot]com
AIM: fancylightning, neveronceperfect
Other: Plurk: sayheyiloveyou
Are you at least 15?: Y. 22.
Current Characters: N/A
Character: Angel
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel
Character Notes:
History:
In 1727, Liam was born in Galway, Ireland. He didn’t amount to much at all, preferring to partake in ale and sex with women in the village much to his father’s chagrin. In 1753, he was kicked out of the local tavern. Inside, he caught a woman’s eye, Darla. It turned out that she was a vampire. She sired him that that night. Immediately after rising from his grave, his set about terrorizing the village - beginning with his family. He saved his father for last and told him specifically that he had made something of himself. Liam then changed his name to Angelus. She brought him to the Master, a much older vampire who sired her. Angelus balked at being on anyone’s court and Darla left with Angelus.
In 1764, Angelus and Darla killed and turned a vampire hunter’s daughter. Holtz, the vampire hunter, was forced to kill her and swore revenge. He followed them until 1771 when he captured Angelus. Holtz tried to get Angelus to help him capture Darla but she instead rescued him. She even spared Holtz’ life, calling him family.
In 1786, Angelus sired a commoner, Penn who adopted his signature. Thirteen years later, Angelus encountered The Beast who sought help in dispatching the group who was after him. Angelus declined and was attacked but the Svear priestesses swooped in and essentially saved him.
In 1860, Darla pointed out a woman, Drusilla, who had the sight. He posed as her priest to torment her before killing her family. Drusilla fled to a convent and on the night she was supposed to take her holy orders, he massacred the convent. Pushing her over the edge into insanity, he then turned her, citing Drusilla as his greatest masterpiece as she’d be tormented immortally.
Not long after, Drusilla turned William, a dreadful poet. William, who looked up to Angelus, considered him his sire. To spite him, after finding out just how much Drusilla meant to him, Angelus had sex with Drusilla.
In 1894, the Immortal captured Spike and Angel. While they were being held captive, he had a threesome with Darla and Drusilla, something they had never done with Angel nor Drusilla.
In 1898, Angelus raped and murdered a gypsy daughter. The gypsies then cursed him with a soul. The condition with this soul was when Angel achieved a moment of perfect happiness, he would lose it. He tried fighting his newfound humanity, even bringing an infant to Darla, but he couldn’t bring himself to feed on it.
In the early 1900’s, due to guilt over his past transgressions and his general uneasiness with what he was, a vampire with a soul, Angel retreated from the world, preferring the hermit route. He fled to America through Ellis Island in 1902. During World War II, he accepted a mission from the Demon Research Initiative. He was sunk to the bottom of the ocean in order to rescue an American submarine. The vampires captured on it had escaped and killed most of the crew. He was forced to sire an ensign as well.
In 1952, Angel was a resident at The Hyperion, a hotel ripe with paranoia thanks to McCarthyism and a Thesulac demon who fed on fear. After a young woman turned on him, he was hung. Slipping out of the knot, he let the demon have the hotel, preferring to leave as humanity once again had failed him.
In the late 1970’s in New York, Angel witnessed the shooting of a young donut shop employee. He was there with the man when he died and couldn’t stop himself from feeding on the man. To punish himself, he resigned himself to a life on the streets.
In 1996, a demon, Whistler sought out Angel to encourage him to make something of himself. He brought him to Sunnydale. There, Angel witnessed the calling of a slayer, Buffy Summers and from afar, he fell in love with her. Because of Whistler, he now had a purpose in his life.
In Sunnydale, he introduced himself as Angel to Buffy and gave her a gift, a cross necklace. They grew close until one night after being invited inside, he vamped out after kissing her. Buffy discovered his horrible past and assumed he was working on the side of evil but Angel killing Darla proved what side he really was on. He rescued Giles, Willow, and Xander when they’re stuck inside the boiler room. After Buffy drowned, he and Xander discovered her at the mouth of hell. Unable to help her, he asked Xander to bring her back.
During Buffy’s junior year, she and Angel grew closer. Their dates consisted of slaying, patrolling through the graveyard and most late night activities. After he and Drusilla rolled into town, Angel was captured by Spike in order to perform a spell to restore Drusilla’s strength. After discovering another nefarious plot involving a demon called the Judge, Buffy and Angel were captured by the duo but escape. Seeking shelter for the night, they finally gave into their passion causing Angelus to emerge. He lost his soul. Immediately, he sided with Drusilla and Spike. He spent the next several months tormenting Buffy mentally. This culminated with the death of Jenny Calendar. Angelus’ endgame involved the demon Acathla and plunging the world into Hell. At the same time, Willow found Jenny Calendar’s translated spell for reensouling Angel. Xander, selfishly, kept back this knowledge from Buffy. Angelus and Buffy’s fight ended with Buffy about to plunge a sword into his chest. At that moment, Angel’s soul was returned to him. Unable to remember anything, Buffy told him to close his eyes before doing what she had set out to do in the first place, save the world. She stabbed him, effectively closing the portal and sending him to hell.
Angel was brought back, however, with no explanation whatsoever when Buffy set her Claddaugh ring down in the abandoned mansion where she had killed him. At first, he was feral, having been in Hell but it wasn’t long before he was civilized again, relegating himself to staying in the mansion and reading quietly. Xander discovered his existence and accused Buffy of being blind to the evil that was Angel, sending the third Slayer, Faith after him. Around Christmas time, Angel was tormented by an incorporeal evil, The First Evil, which appeared to him as his past victims. Buffy convinced him to not kill himself, however, and they learned that it was The First Evil who’d brought him back. Through Buffy’s senior year, it became evident to Angel that they had no future together. The slayer, Faith, who had moved to the dark side, hit him with a poisoned arrow. In order to save him, Buffy had Angel drink from her. After, he took her to the hospital. He fought along side her at graduation against the Mayor and then left without saying goodbye.
In Los Angeles, a half-demon Doyle found him, convincing him they were meant to work together because of the Powers That Be. At an industry party, Angel ran into Cordelia Chase, who’d traveled to Los Angeles to make it big. After saving her from a vampire - and making a scene at an evil law firm - Angel, Doyle, and Cordelia banded together to “help the hopeless.” It became apparent that this was his path that he was meant to be on. Unable to stay away from Sunnydale completely, he dropped in without letting her know around Thanksgiving. She followed him right back to L.A., calling him a coward. During their argument, a Moihra demon attacked. After tracking it into the sewers, some of its blood mixed with Angel’s causing him to become human. At last, he and Buffy could be together. Unfortunately, this meant Buffy was putting herself into more danger, pushing herself to her limits. Angel seeked out the Oracles and asked them to take back the day, in order to prolong Buffy’s life. He did this unselfishly. From then on, he had to live with the memory of that day, alone.
A small genocide was occurring with Doyle’s species. Doyle, in order to save those like him, killed himself - but not before kissing Cordelia. Through the kiss, she then became the conduit to the Powers that Be. Not long after, Wesley Wyndam-Pryce, Faith’s old watcher turned demon hunter sided with them. When Faith blew into town and Wolfram and Hart contracted her to kill him, Angel took her in, trying to convince her she was worthy of redemption. Buffy followed Faith to L.A. and was taken aback to find Angel was helping Faith. Angel followed Buffy back to Sunnydale and encountered her new squeeze, Riley. Back in L.A., he discovered a new prophecy, that he would shanshu when he was finished being a champion - it was found out that shanshu meant to become human. Now, he has something to hope for, and two allies he trusts very much.
Personality:
Angel’s personality is essentially a series of contradictions. Before being turned at age twenty-six, he was known for his drinking and promiscuity. He was quite immature for his age already before being sired by Darla. The Gypsy curse grounded him indefinitely and guilt overcame him. Over the years, he had no choice but to mature. Because he became a sort of recluse, he turned to books and his photographic memory ensured that he learned what he read. Angel is extremely intelligent and he enjoys reading. He’d rather stay home reading then go to a movie. The contradiction comes when he can act like a sixteen year old teenager. He can get to the point where he is actually whining and if he doesn’t get his way. He can seriously sulk.
Angel is a world class brooder. He will sit alone in the dark and recount past sins. He will contemplate where he has been in his life, where he could possibly be going, as well as a time in the (hopefully not too distant future) where he becomes human.
At his core, Angel is a champion. That is how he sees himself. At first, he doesn’t want to charge clients of theirs because they’re helping people in need. Angel will defend those who need it. He doesn’t judge a being based on their race. Being a demon and a vampire helps him with that. In a way, Angel will never belong completely to the vampire world or to the human world to him, that is his true curse. That moment of true happiness is just a party favor.
Despite regarding himself as a righteous champion, Angel can be quite selfish. In season 2, before taking it upon himself to dispatch Darla and Drusilla, he fires his team when he realizes they’re holding him back from doing what he thinks he should do.
Angel has a very dark side to him because of his history as Angelus. As I mentioned in the abilities section, he is a master in torture techniques. For years, he purposefully cut off emotion towards others and during season 2, he revisits that idea. He goes solo and does a few morally grey things and only stumbles into helping people. Because of that, Angel’s destiny involves the people surrounding him because without them, it is easy for him to veer off in another direction.
At periods of time, Angel suffers from ennui, dealing with both his past and the fact that he’s cursed to be eternally alone. But, as an update, Angel has learned that when having sex with a woman who isn’t Buffy, or that he doesn’t achieve that moment of one true happiness with, he can in fact get busy. This is shown through his brief relationship with Nina the werewolf. But, it takes Angel a lot to actually form a real attachment with a woman romantically. With Buffy, he fell in love from afar, fascinated by her. With Cordelia, that love grew out of friendship, trust and respect. Because he blames himself for a lot, it’s hard for him to let himself feel something real especially because it never ends well for him. He turned into Angelus with Buffy and Cordelia ascended, completely thwarting any chance they had with one another.
Angel is very observant. He pays attention to how a person acts in different situations and because of that, he’s very good at predicting outcomes. He gives Cordelia a gift of clothes because he knows how she will react and that despite something really “meaning something more” at that time, she’ll love clothes the most. He really gets to know the people he’s around.
Constantly, Angel worries about the demon inside him, Angelus. He can feel him there beneath the surface. He is ashamed of what he used to be, ashamed of what he’s done. Nothing he has done he can take back so he does what he good he can. Something that Angel has always done, is he has always followed through with what he thinks is right. At the time, taking over Wolfram and Hart was right to him. Taking away Connor’s memories was right to him.
Speaking of, Angel is incredibly selfless. When he becomes human in “I Will Remember You” he takes back the day for Buffy. He takes away Connor’s memories in “Home” to give him a better life. Unfortunately, through this, he takes everyone else’s memory of Connor’s existence. He has to live with both of those burdens. Knowing that - at one time - he had happiness in his grasp.
Angel can be a complete dork. This feeds back into his tendency to be a teenager. Little things can really excite and entertain him. Technology is his arch enemy. He hates it. Computers are for everyone else to use. He even has trouble mastering a phone at Wolfram and Heart. Angel has a temper. If you wrong him or his people personally, he will not hesitate to lash out. He’s by no means a pacifist. If he has to, he kicks ass. A part of him definitely likes kicking ass. Angel’s humor can be quite dry when he wants it to be. But, despite being pretty stoic he has a sense of humor - a pretty awesome one if you ask him. He’s a fan of the classics when it comes to movies and music and Barry Manilow is his all time favorite musician.
Angel is a very forgiving person. At first, he may lash out directly (especially with Wesley in the hospital after kidnapping his son) but, over time he forgives. His own son tried to kill him and in the end he gave him a better life. Angel cares about people more than he lets on. A very good way of describing him is the phrase, still waters run deep.
Buffy Summers is Angel’s always and his never. Explaining this further, a part of him will always love her but he knows that they can never be together. Partially, this is because of the curse and partially because he can’t let himself be with her. Without him, she is better off. He truly believes this. Part of this was drilled into him by her mother but a part of him always knew.
Cordelia is Angel’s could have been and probably the woman he loved the deepest in the most unconditional way. His respect for her grew over time as well as his concern for her regarding her visions. Taking care of Connor together and growing closer had been a natural progression and somewhere between sleeping in the same bed with a baby and calling about meeting each other they were in love. It took time but Angel knew in the back of his mind what they were going to say to each other that night. And, even before he knows it was Jasmine who slept with Connor and not Cordelia, he’s seen forgiving her for it in “Awakening.”
Angel will always love Connor. He is his son. No matter what he does, Angel understands Holtz had misled him. Connor was dealt a really rough hand and Angel can’t blame him but when he does act out, Angel won’t hesitate to lay the smack down. He believes in discipline. And because he failed with his own father (he was a disgrace in his eyes) he didn’t want to fail with Connor so he gave him a chance at a real life.
Darla. Angel has never and will never love Darla. That said, his feelings for her are extremely complicated. When all is said and done, he feels something for her. He feels that he can do something when he learns she’s dying and even prepares himself to do so. After her second transformation, he readies himself to kill her and sets both she and Drusilla on fire. He’s extremely sexually attracted to her. She’s starred in several of his dreams. Unfortunately, that will never change. But, he will steal feel something towards her especially since she carried his child.
Nina comes at a time when Angel is at peace with his curse and has discovered that not every sexual escapade needs to be accompanied by deeper feelings. Things were very dark towards the end and he needed an outlet, a sexual outlet and he saw something in Nina that he saw in himself. There’s the idea of her inner beast. All that being said, Angel has a sex drive and he has needs like anybody else, he just stops himself from indulging in them usually and Nina comes at a time when he allows himself that release. But, at this point in the series, he's nowhere near then.
Other:
Additional Links:
First Person (entry type):
[ Angel isn’t aware the camera is on, the following is text. He also looks very perturbed. Behind him, you can see a girlier apartment than you’d expect him to be in. ]
all i want to do is findut information about a pria motu demon. i cn’t et to anything else. i dont even use this thing much. and i have to keep typing slower the wrong words are coming out and this is all cordelias fault
[ There’s a pause as he stares at the keys before skillfully adding… ]
!!! [ Three don’t seem to be enough so he types more out. ] !!!!!!!!!
[ Then he notices the small box in the corner of the computer screen. He looks up at the camera. - Oh, that’s what that is… ]
Can you see me? Who am I even talking to? What is this and why can’t I get to anything else? I have enough problems with this stupid thing already!
[ He yells behind him. ]
Cordelia! Wes?!
Third Person:
He tried to picture what it would be like, finally being human. Earlier that year, he had been but that had been a false humanity. He wasn't meant to be unnaturally human. He was meant to be human - it was just a matter of when. It helped that he had proof, a confirmation that everything he was doing wasn't a waste. Cordelia had left him alone, preferring to sleep over watching him sit and think all night. Angel was used to thinking. The difference between his thinking now and his thinking last week was definitely his optimism. Someday, what he was doing would pay off and he would be mortal. He would breathe, taste, see his reflection and maybe someday he would age.
Angel fought with himself over whether he even deserved to ever be human again. The atrocities he had committed over time swam through his mind constantly. There was never a moment where Angel was at peace. Even in dreams, he relived his tormenting, his machinations, his ... evil.
Picking up his mug of blood, Angel took a sip, staring out the window. Someday, blood wouldn't provide him nourishment. The taste assaulted his mouth as he set the mug back down again. He was going to talk to Cordelia about spicing up his blood. Cinnamon didn't enhance anything. It just made the blood inedible. He thanked Cordelia inside his mind before moving to her couch and stretching out along it.
Angel had been switching between living at Cordelia's and Wesley's apartments. As much as he liked the company - and as much as he would never admit that he liked it - he knew they needed a new headquarters. And this one was not going to blow up.
Player LJ: wayitcomes
Way to contact you:
Email: such.a.heart[at]gmail[dot]com
AIM: fancylightning, neveronceperfect
Other: Plurk: sayheyiloveyou
Are you at least 15?: Y. 22.
Current Characters: N/A
Character: Angel
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel
Character Notes:
History:
In 1727, Liam was born in Galway, Ireland. He didn’t amount to much at all, preferring to partake in ale and sex with women in the village much to his father’s chagrin. In 1753, he was kicked out of the local tavern. Inside, he caught a woman’s eye, Darla. It turned out that she was a vampire. She sired him that that night. Immediately after rising from his grave, his set about terrorizing the village - beginning with his family. He saved his father for last and told him specifically that he had made something of himself. Liam then changed his name to Angelus. She brought him to the Master, a much older vampire who sired her. Angelus balked at being on anyone’s court and Darla left with Angelus.
In 1764, Angelus and Darla killed and turned a vampire hunter’s daughter. Holtz, the vampire hunter, was forced to kill her and swore revenge. He followed them until 1771 when he captured Angelus. Holtz tried to get Angelus to help him capture Darla but she instead rescued him. She even spared Holtz’ life, calling him family.
In 1786, Angelus sired a commoner, Penn who adopted his signature. Thirteen years later, Angelus encountered The Beast who sought help in dispatching the group who was after him. Angelus declined and was attacked but the Svear priestesses swooped in and essentially saved him.
In 1860, Darla pointed out a woman, Drusilla, who had the sight. He posed as her priest to torment her before killing her family. Drusilla fled to a convent and on the night she was supposed to take her holy orders, he massacred the convent. Pushing her over the edge into insanity, he then turned her, citing Drusilla as his greatest masterpiece as she’d be tormented immortally.
Not long after, Drusilla turned William, a dreadful poet. William, who looked up to Angelus, considered him his sire. To spite him, after finding out just how much Drusilla meant to him, Angelus had sex with Drusilla.
In 1894, the Immortal captured Spike and Angel. While they were being held captive, he had a threesome with Darla and Drusilla, something they had never done with Angel nor Drusilla.
In 1898, Angelus raped and murdered a gypsy daughter. The gypsies then cursed him with a soul. The condition with this soul was when Angel achieved a moment of perfect happiness, he would lose it. He tried fighting his newfound humanity, even bringing an infant to Darla, but he couldn’t bring himself to feed on it.
In the early 1900’s, due to guilt over his past transgressions and his general uneasiness with what he was, a vampire with a soul, Angel retreated from the world, preferring the hermit route. He fled to America through Ellis Island in 1902. During World War II, he accepted a mission from the Demon Research Initiative. He was sunk to the bottom of the ocean in order to rescue an American submarine. The vampires captured on it had escaped and killed most of the crew. He was forced to sire an ensign as well.
In 1952, Angel was a resident at The Hyperion, a hotel ripe with paranoia thanks to McCarthyism and a Thesulac demon who fed on fear. After a young woman turned on him, he was hung. Slipping out of the knot, he let the demon have the hotel, preferring to leave as humanity once again had failed him.
In the late 1970’s in New York, Angel witnessed the shooting of a young donut shop employee. He was there with the man when he died and couldn’t stop himself from feeding on the man. To punish himself, he resigned himself to a life on the streets.
In 1996, a demon, Whistler sought out Angel to encourage him to make something of himself. He brought him to Sunnydale. There, Angel witnessed the calling of a slayer, Buffy Summers and from afar, he fell in love with her. Because of Whistler, he now had a purpose in his life.
In Sunnydale, he introduced himself as Angel to Buffy and gave her a gift, a cross necklace. They grew close until one night after being invited inside, he vamped out after kissing her. Buffy discovered his horrible past and assumed he was working on the side of evil but Angel killing Darla proved what side he really was on. He rescued Giles, Willow, and Xander when they’re stuck inside the boiler room. After Buffy drowned, he and Xander discovered her at the mouth of hell. Unable to help her, he asked Xander to bring her back.
During Buffy’s junior year, she and Angel grew closer. Their dates consisted of slaying, patrolling through the graveyard and most late night activities. After he and Drusilla rolled into town, Angel was captured by Spike in order to perform a spell to restore Drusilla’s strength. After discovering another nefarious plot involving a demon called the Judge, Buffy and Angel were captured by the duo but escape. Seeking shelter for the night, they finally gave into their passion causing Angelus to emerge. He lost his soul. Immediately, he sided with Drusilla and Spike. He spent the next several months tormenting Buffy mentally. This culminated with the death of Jenny Calendar. Angelus’ endgame involved the demon Acathla and plunging the world into Hell. At the same time, Willow found Jenny Calendar’s translated spell for reensouling Angel. Xander, selfishly, kept back this knowledge from Buffy. Angelus and Buffy’s fight ended with Buffy about to plunge a sword into his chest. At that moment, Angel’s soul was returned to him. Unable to remember anything, Buffy told him to close his eyes before doing what she had set out to do in the first place, save the world. She stabbed him, effectively closing the portal and sending him to hell.
Angel was brought back, however, with no explanation whatsoever when Buffy set her Claddaugh ring down in the abandoned mansion where she had killed him. At first, he was feral, having been in Hell but it wasn’t long before he was civilized again, relegating himself to staying in the mansion and reading quietly. Xander discovered his existence and accused Buffy of being blind to the evil that was Angel, sending the third Slayer, Faith after him. Around Christmas time, Angel was tormented by an incorporeal evil, The First Evil, which appeared to him as his past victims. Buffy convinced him to not kill himself, however, and they learned that it was The First Evil who’d brought him back. Through Buffy’s senior year, it became evident to Angel that they had no future together. The slayer, Faith, who had moved to the dark side, hit him with a poisoned arrow. In order to save him, Buffy had Angel drink from her. After, he took her to the hospital. He fought along side her at graduation against the Mayor and then left without saying goodbye.
In Los Angeles, a half-demon Doyle found him, convincing him they were meant to work together because of the Powers That Be. At an industry party, Angel ran into Cordelia Chase, who’d traveled to Los Angeles to make it big. After saving her from a vampire - and making a scene at an evil law firm - Angel, Doyle, and Cordelia banded together to “help the hopeless.” It became apparent that this was his path that he was meant to be on. Unable to stay away from Sunnydale completely, he dropped in without letting her know around Thanksgiving. She followed him right back to L.A., calling him a coward. During their argument, a Moihra demon attacked. After tracking it into the sewers, some of its blood mixed with Angel’s causing him to become human. At last, he and Buffy could be together. Unfortunately, this meant Buffy was putting herself into more danger, pushing herself to her limits. Angel seeked out the Oracles and asked them to take back the day, in order to prolong Buffy’s life. He did this unselfishly. From then on, he had to live with the memory of that day, alone.
A small genocide was occurring with Doyle’s species. Doyle, in order to save those like him, killed himself - but not before kissing Cordelia. Through the kiss, she then became the conduit to the Powers that Be. Not long after, Wesley Wyndam-Pryce, Faith’s old watcher turned demon hunter sided with them. When Faith blew into town and Wolfram and Hart contracted her to kill him, Angel took her in, trying to convince her she was worthy of redemption. Buffy followed Faith to L.A. and was taken aback to find Angel was helping Faith. Angel followed Buffy back to Sunnydale and encountered her new squeeze, Riley. Back in L.A., he discovered a new prophecy, that he would shanshu when he was finished being a champion - it was found out that shanshu meant to become human. Now, he has something to hope for, and two allies he trusts very much.
Personality:
Angel’s personality is essentially a series of contradictions. Before being turned at age twenty-six, he was known for his drinking and promiscuity. He was quite immature for his age already before being sired by Darla. The Gypsy curse grounded him indefinitely and guilt overcame him. Over the years, he had no choice but to mature. Because he became a sort of recluse, he turned to books and his photographic memory ensured that he learned what he read. Angel is extremely intelligent and he enjoys reading. He’d rather stay home reading then go to a movie. The contradiction comes when he can act like a sixteen year old teenager. He can get to the point where he is actually whining and if he doesn’t get his way. He can seriously sulk.
Angel is a world class brooder. He will sit alone in the dark and recount past sins. He will contemplate where he has been in his life, where he could possibly be going, as well as a time in the (hopefully not too distant future) where he becomes human.
At his core, Angel is a champion. That is how he sees himself. At first, he doesn’t want to charge clients of theirs because they’re helping people in need. Angel will defend those who need it. He doesn’t judge a being based on their race. Being a demon and a vampire helps him with that. In a way, Angel will never belong completely to the vampire world or to the human world to him, that is his true curse. That moment of true happiness is just a party favor.
Despite regarding himself as a righteous champion, Angel can be quite selfish. In season 2, before taking it upon himself to dispatch Darla and Drusilla, he fires his team when he realizes they’re holding him back from doing what he thinks he should do.
Angel has a very dark side to him because of his history as Angelus. As I mentioned in the abilities section, he is a master in torture techniques. For years, he purposefully cut off emotion towards others and during season 2, he revisits that idea. He goes solo and does a few morally grey things and only stumbles into helping people. Because of that, Angel’s destiny involves the people surrounding him because without them, it is easy for him to veer off in another direction.
At periods of time, Angel suffers from ennui, dealing with both his past and the fact that he’s cursed to be eternally alone. But, as an update, Angel has learned that when having sex with a woman who isn’t Buffy, or that he doesn’t achieve that moment of one true happiness with, he can in fact get busy. This is shown through his brief relationship with Nina the werewolf. But, it takes Angel a lot to actually form a real attachment with a woman romantically. With Buffy, he fell in love from afar, fascinated by her. With Cordelia, that love grew out of friendship, trust and respect. Because he blames himself for a lot, it’s hard for him to let himself feel something real especially because it never ends well for him. He turned into Angelus with Buffy and Cordelia ascended, completely thwarting any chance they had with one another.
Angel is very observant. He pays attention to how a person acts in different situations and because of that, he’s very good at predicting outcomes. He gives Cordelia a gift of clothes because he knows how she will react and that despite something really “meaning something more” at that time, she’ll love clothes the most. He really gets to know the people he’s around.
Constantly, Angel worries about the demon inside him, Angelus. He can feel him there beneath the surface. He is ashamed of what he used to be, ashamed of what he’s done. Nothing he has done he can take back so he does what he good he can. Something that Angel has always done, is he has always followed through with what he thinks is right. At the time, taking over Wolfram and Hart was right to him. Taking away Connor’s memories was right to him.
Speaking of, Angel is incredibly selfless. When he becomes human in “I Will Remember You” he takes back the day for Buffy. He takes away Connor’s memories in “Home” to give him a better life. Unfortunately, through this, he takes everyone else’s memory of Connor’s existence. He has to live with both of those burdens. Knowing that - at one time - he had happiness in his grasp.
Angel can be a complete dork. This feeds back into his tendency to be a teenager. Little things can really excite and entertain him. Technology is his arch enemy. He hates it. Computers are for everyone else to use. He even has trouble mastering a phone at Wolfram and Heart. Angel has a temper. If you wrong him or his people personally, he will not hesitate to lash out. He’s by no means a pacifist. If he has to, he kicks ass. A part of him definitely likes kicking ass. Angel’s humor can be quite dry when he wants it to be. But, despite being pretty stoic he has a sense of humor - a pretty awesome one if you ask him. He’s a fan of the classics when it comes to movies and music and Barry Manilow is his all time favorite musician.
Angel is a very forgiving person. At first, he may lash out directly (especially with Wesley in the hospital after kidnapping his son) but, over time he forgives. His own son tried to kill him and in the end he gave him a better life. Angel cares about people more than he lets on. A very good way of describing him is the phrase, still waters run deep.
Buffy Summers is Angel’s always and his never. Explaining this further, a part of him will always love her but he knows that they can never be together. Partially, this is because of the curse and partially because he can’t let himself be with her. Without him, she is better off. He truly believes this. Part of this was drilled into him by her mother but a part of him always knew.
Cordelia is Angel’s could have been and probably the woman he loved the deepest in the most unconditional way. His respect for her grew over time as well as his concern for her regarding her visions. Taking care of Connor together and growing closer had been a natural progression and somewhere between sleeping in the same bed with a baby and calling about meeting each other they were in love. It took time but Angel knew in the back of his mind what they were going to say to each other that night. And, even before he knows it was Jasmine who slept with Connor and not Cordelia, he’s seen forgiving her for it in “Awakening.”
Angel will always love Connor. He is his son. No matter what he does, Angel understands Holtz had misled him. Connor was dealt a really rough hand and Angel can’t blame him but when he does act out, Angel won’t hesitate to lay the smack down. He believes in discipline. And because he failed with his own father (he was a disgrace in his eyes) he didn’t want to fail with Connor so he gave him a chance at a real life.
Darla. Angel has never and will never love Darla. That said, his feelings for her are extremely complicated. When all is said and done, he feels something for her. He feels that he can do something when he learns she’s dying and even prepares himself to do so. After her second transformation, he readies himself to kill her and sets both she and Drusilla on fire. He’s extremely sexually attracted to her. She’s starred in several of his dreams. Unfortunately, that will never change. But, he will steal feel something towards her especially since she carried his child.
Nina comes at a time when Angel is at peace with his curse and has discovered that not every sexual escapade needs to be accompanied by deeper feelings. Things were very dark towards the end and he needed an outlet, a sexual outlet and he saw something in Nina that he saw in himself. There’s the idea of her inner beast. All that being said, Angel has a sex drive and he has needs like anybody else, he just stops himself from indulging in them usually and Nina comes at a time when he allows himself that release. But, at this point in the series, he's nowhere near then.
Other:
Additional Links:
First Person (entry type):
[ Angel isn’t aware the camera is on, the following is text. He also looks very perturbed. Behind him, you can see a girlier apartment than you’d expect him to be in. ]
all i want to do is findut information about a pria motu demon. i cn’t et to anything else. i dont even use this thing much. and i have to keep typing slower the wrong words are coming out and this is all cordelias fault
[ There’s a pause as he stares at the keys before skillfully adding… ]
!!! [ Three don’t seem to be enough so he types more out. ] !!!!!!!!!
[ Then he notices the small box in the corner of the computer screen. He looks up at the camera. - Oh, that’s what that is… ]
Can you see me? Who am I even talking to? What is this and why can’t I get to anything else? I have enough problems with this stupid thing already!
[ He yells behind him. ]
Cordelia! Wes?!
Third Person:
He tried to picture what it would be like, finally being human. Earlier that year, he had been but that had been a false humanity. He wasn't meant to be unnaturally human. He was meant to be human - it was just a matter of when. It helped that he had proof, a confirmation that everything he was doing wasn't a waste. Cordelia had left him alone, preferring to sleep over watching him sit and think all night. Angel was used to thinking. The difference between his thinking now and his thinking last week was definitely his optimism. Someday, what he was doing would pay off and he would be mortal. He would breathe, taste, see his reflection and maybe someday he would age.
Angel fought with himself over whether he even deserved to ever be human again. The atrocities he had committed over time swam through his mind constantly. There was never a moment where Angel was at peace. Even in dreams, he relived his tormenting, his machinations, his ... evil.
Picking up his mug of blood, Angel took a sip, staring out the window. Someday, blood wouldn't provide him nourishment. The taste assaulted his mouth as he set the mug back down again. He was going to talk to Cordelia about spicing up his blood. Cinnamon didn't enhance anything. It just made the blood inedible. He thanked Cordelia inside his mind before moving to her couch and stretching out along it.
Angel had been switching between living at Cordelia's and Wesley's apartments. As much as he liked the company - and as much as he would never admit that he liked it - he knew they needed a new headquarters. And this one was not going to blow up.