depressed
today was really depressing didnt do much of anything! i had a really deep convo with nick though... here it is
1deathb4dishoner8: hey
PrincessAlly231: hi
PrincessAlly231: how r u?
deathb4dishoner8: good and u?
PrincessAlly231: im ok i guess
PrincessAlly231: kina depreesd
deathb4dishoner8: same x 1 trillion
deathb4dishoner8: wuts up w/ u
PrincessAlly231: i dont really know why like im supposed to livbe ya know?
deathb4dishoner8: ya
PrincessAlly231: like i know i have lots of friends but like
PrincessAlly231: you have to think sometimes like...
PrincessAlly231: i have no idea what the fuck im supposed to do with my life
deathb4dishoner8: me 2
deathb4dishoner8: like i need a last resort
PrincessAlly231: i know what u meen
deathb4dishoner8: im in sooo much shit and my life is beggining to have no reason to live
PrincessAlly231: sometimes u get so bored that u think about what death feels like
PrincessAlly231: what happened?
deathb4dishoner8: well....
deathb4dishoner8: like i just got back from my 4 hour evaluatoion at silvan i finnally decide to stop smoking weed and my mom finds my zig zags and like iono the girl i reely want and like for a long time finnally likes me and i dont think i like her and me and my parents hate eachother i justwant it all 2 end
deathb4dishoner8: i wanna start again clean
PrincessAlly231: i know how ur feeling
deathb4dishoner8: and im failing skool
deathb4dishoner8: ya it sux shit
deathb4dishoner8: the only thing thats reely worht living for rite now to me i music
PrincessAlly231: i know
deathb4dishoner8: hows it goin w/ elais
deathb4dishoner8: ?
PrincessAlly231: its going good
deathb4dishoner8: thats good
PrincessAlly231: i just am sscared for myself
deathb4dishoner8: ???
PrincessAlly231: like i HATE my past
deathb4dishoner8: what do u hate baout ur past
PrincessAlly231: and i dont know what the futures holding for me
PrincessAlly231: everything
PrincessAlly231: boys
deathb4dishoner8: me 2
PrincessAlly231: girls
PrincessAlly231: me
deathb4dishoner8: i feel like i ahve no future iff MUSIC fails
deathb4dishoner8: i just figure iff i start now itds goottta b good
PrincessAlly231: its weird but no matter how much people say uve changed u really dont feel u have
deathb4dishoner8: i no its always the same feeling
deathb4dishoner8: the grass is always greener on the other side
PrincessAlly231: and im so fucking sick of putting me down
PrincessAlly231: people*
PrincessAlly231: like
PrincessAlly231: then after words u feel ur stronger cause u went through all this shit
PrincessAlly231: but then it all just happens again
deathb4dishoner8: all i no i i wanna get out of this place
deathb4dishoner8: and i no were i wanna go
deathb4dishoner8: OLYMPIA
PrincessAlly231: ?
PrincessAlly231: where in the fuck is that?
deathb4dishoner8: its this place in washington rite next to seattle
deathb4dishoner8: its like heaven
deathb4dishoner8: everyones so poor that everything becomes fun
PrincessAlly231: really
deathb4dishoner8: ya everyone like lives w/ there frends
deathb4dishoner8: the live in like the forrest and its cheap as hell
deathb4dishoner8: the best banfds come from there
PrincessAlly231: cool
deathb4dishoner8: and is rite next to seattkle
deathb4dishoner8: ya i think so
deathb4dishoner8: as soon as im 16 im leavin and im gonna try and take as many people as possible w/ me
PrincessAlly231: i know dude
deathb4dishoner8: ya
PrincessAlly231: i fucking HATE this gay as world!
deathb4dishoner8: nothing goes wrong to its such a small hippi town
deathb4dishoner8: its like everyone nos everyone
deathb4dishoner8: my older sister lives there
deathb4dishoner8: she loves it
PrincessAlly231: thats so awesome
deathb4dishoner8: were do u wanna go?
PrincessAlly231: well at least u have an idea of what ur gonna do
PrincessAlly231: go*
deathb4dishoner8: ya
PrincessAlly231: FUCK THIS!
PrincessAlly231: i dont know what the hell im gonna do!
deathb4dishoner8: im the kinda person whos fine w/ out money and luxuary
PrincessAlly231: im moving away in 5 years and that is fucking scary
deathb4dishoner8: haha
deathb4dishoner8: kewl
PrincessAlly231: ive been like protected in this fucking box my whole life
PrincessAlly231: and now i have to walk the fuck outta it
deathb4dishoner8: well u have it pretty good in that box....
PrincessAlly231: AND THATS SHITTY!
PrincessAlly231: i know
PrincessAlly231: but i hate it at the same time!
deathb4dishoner8: u have ur frends ur family and elias
deathb4dishoner8: ya....
PrincessAlly231: i know dude
PrincessAlly231: but like what happens when thats over
deathb4dishoner8: ur lucky i dont think ill ever find someone i could go steady w/ like u and elais r
deathb4dishoner8: well it doesnt end
PrincessAlly231: that really fucks with my head
deathb4dishoner8: as long s u keep it up w/ eliasa
PrincessAlly231: thats what i thought too
PrincessAlly231: but now i dont
deathb4dishoner8: ??
PrincessAlly231: i told li that i wanted to be his girl forever right
PrincessAlly231: ?
deathb4dishoner8: therer r dofferent paths in life
PrincessAlly231: and hes like well...
PrincessAlly231: i dont know
deathb4dishoner8: elias is gonna grow up and get married and have a family hes justthat kinda guy
deathb4dishoner8: and ur his girl
PrincessAlly231: ill probably break up with u
PrincessAlly231: no i dont think so
PrincessAlly231: i dont knopw what to think about us anymore
PrincessAlly231: i love him and always will
deathb4dishoner8: and he feels the same way
PrincessAlly231: but if i ever saw him with another girl
deathb4dishoner8: so u have ur own path together
PrincessAlly231: i think id die
deathb4dishoner8: hmmm
deathb4dishoner8: hes trustorthy
deathb4dishoner8: i think so at least
PrincessAlly231: i know
deathb4dishoner8: ya no now thta i think about it i think im gonna like fly solo 4ever
deathb4dishoner8: cause i like have always been that way
PrincessAlly231: i dont think so
deathb4dishoner8: i can only reely care for myself
deathb4dishoner8: and hardly at thta
PrincessAlly231: i think ur the most amazing person ive ever known
deathb4dishoner8: hahahahahaaha
deathb4dishoner8: thnx u 2 ;-)
PrincessAlly231: i think that ud be such a good bf
PrincessAlly231: u know y?
deathb4dishoner8: nooo not itsactly
deathb4dishoner8: why
PrincessAlly231: cause u care soo much
PrincessAlly231: its true
PrincessAlly231: and u know it
deathb4dishoner8: no i think the oppisiste i dont care enough
deathb4dishoner8: and i alwayts fuck up
deathb4dishoner8: BAD
PrincessAlly231: and u talk about people in such away that people are drawn to them
deathb4dishoner8: iff thats me handoling myself i cantr be that way for someone else
PrincessAlly231: no
PrincessAlly231: i think if u met the right girl
PrincessAlly231: ud be with her forever
deathb4dishoner8: ya i no
deathb4dishoner8: but that girl just doesnt exist
deathb4dishoner8: and i accept that
PrincessAlly231: yea she does
deathb4dishoner8: ....
PrincessAlly231: i want u to read this...
deathb4dishoner8: ok
PrincessAlly231: hey everyone whats up?
im really upset over everthing tright now! i dont think its anyones fucking buissness about me and li!!!!! look we love each other and i dont need some fucking asshole tellinmg me different! SERIOUSLY!! just piss off! LOok.. talia and i are bf's and i would NEVER purposly try to hurt her ever! or any of my best friends! i love them all! and just becuase i thought talia was flirting with elias then... dosent meen my opinion hasnt changed now! AND... it dosent meen that i wouldnt like talia! i love talia! and it was really hard for me to tell her what i felt because i didnt want her to get upset! i hate peoploe judjing my relashionships! they probably dont evenknow shit about me! and fuck i meen if ur gonna fucking post annonomysly than at least come up with some better fucking shiut to say! and u know what its all ok!
cauise i have all my best friends my family, AND A BOYFRIEND WHO LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and whoever FUICKING said that has probably had a boyfriend for a day! so i suggest u go fuck urself and find someone else to screw with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAV A NICE FUCKIN DAY BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
-ally
PrincessAlly231: that was my lj
PrincessAlly231: i wrote that cause someone bad mouthed me and elias
PrincessAlly231: ok now read this
PrincessAlly231: Quit ur Bitchin.
Fool u need tocalm the fuck down. How old are u now? 14, 13? There is no such thing as love between someone else than you and your family. saying " I love you" doesn't mean actually LOVE, it means like. So u need to quit your bitchin and find something better to do. AND A BOYFRIEND WHO LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thats fucking bullshit. He doesn't love you. He LIKES you. Theres a big difference. You probably gonna break up with you in like a month or something and ur gonna say you never loved him and shit. So quit ur bitchin and take an ADVIL. Or maybe just some anger managment. Have a wonderful day.
PrincessAlly231: :-[:'(
PrincessAlly231: He doesn't love you
PrincessAlly231: stuff like that FUCKING HURTS!!!!
deathb4dishoner8: who was it?
PrincessAlly231: i dont know
deathb4dishoner8: sounds lik eugene
PrincessAlly231: wowza
deathb4dishoner8: dunno
deathb4dishoner8: but that sux
deathb4dishoner8: i belive in love
deathb4dishoner8: someone signed my journallike that 2
deathb4dishoner8: i dont no who it is
deathb4dishoner8: they were like america is such a liberal place u have no idea
PrincessAlly231: fuck this!!!
deathb4dishoner8: nd i made this long comment
PrincessAlly231: im so fucking mad!
PrincessAlly231: fuck this shit!
deathb4dishoner8: u should find out who it is
deathb4dishoner8: and kik his ass
deathb4dishoner8: lol
PrincessAlly231: i really dont give a fuck about anything anymore seriously
PrincessAlly231: i hate everything!
deathb4dishoner8: u should look into communes
deathb4dishoner8: its called cummunal communisim