(no subject)
PLease just fucking kill me. How can I feel this way right now? How is it possible for me to be crying like this? To keep pressing redial? to keep re reading it to make sure I see everything okay.
It's like I tried to hard to stay away from him.
I tried so fucking hard. No one could possibly know how hard it is to pull away from your one true love when all you want to do is pull them near. I can't belive this is happening. Why am I doing this? WHAT THE FUCK. He can't leave me here. He just can't. And like the whole time he's been making it seem like nothing was going on I didnt know about. Well I'll tell you one thing I was right to not come back to you. You were doing what you do best. I just can't live this life much longer wihout you without us without a heart. I'm not even hear anymore. I can't speak. I can't keep conversations. I can only pretend I'm gonna be okay and prepare myself for the world or hurt that will now be handed back to me. Because I can't live. With or without you.
I fucking miss you and I love you Charles. If you answered your phone at 2 40 am you could know that right now everything I'm about to cry out my eyes is nothing but pure genuine sadness.
It's like I tried to hard to stay away from him.
I tried so fucking hard. No one could possibly know how hard it is to pull away from your one true love when all you want to do is pull them near. I can't belive this is happening. Why am I doing this? WHAT THE FUCK. He can't leave me here. He just can't. And like the whole time he's been making it seem like nothing was going on I didnt know about. Well I'll tell you one thing I was right to not come back to you. You were doing what you do best. I just can't live this life much longer wihout you without us without a heart. I'm not even hear anymore. I can't speak. I can't keep conversations. I can only pretend I'm gonna be okay and prepare myself for the world or hurt that will now be handed back to me. Because I can't live. With or without you.
I fucking miss you and I love you Charles. If you answered your phone at 2 40 am you could know that right now everything I'm about to cry out my eyes is nothing but pure genuine sadness.