[Tiny Toon Adventures / One Piece] Pets
Title: Pets
Author: Icka! M. Chif
Series: One Piece / Tiny Toon Adventures
Word Count: 1009
Rating: General
Warnings: CRACK
Author's Note: For hoshi_ryo. She handed me this plunnie, and then it took hold about midnight. *yawns* Apologies for the lack of proper punchline.
Summary: "Wait! Elmyra loves her cute fuzzy-wuzzies!!! Come back!!!"
+++
"Aren't you just a cutey-wooty." A gleeful voice announced, right next to Chopper's ear and making him jump slightly. A short red-haired girl was staring at him with hearts in her eyes. Literal hearts in her eyes.
As Chopper jumped back and hid behind a nearby stall, breathing fast as he tried to think of a possible medical condition that could turn someone's eyes heart-shaped. Sanji-san got it occasionally too, maybe it was contagious....
"You're just the cutest-wootest cuddly-wuddly fuzzy-wuzzy ever, aren't you?" The girl cooed at him. Upon further inspection, Chopper realised that she had a tiny skull on her hair ribbon.
Unfortunately, this realisation was enough of a distraction for her to suddenly get within touching distance.
And touching distance meant 'choking distance', as Chopper suddenly found himself in a large hug that would have done a bear proud, getting the breath hugged out of him as his ribs threatened to break. "Yes you are! Yes you are!"
"Erk." Chopper managed to squeak as he was suddenly held up like a prized doll, the girl rubbing noses with him.
"I'm gonna take you home!" The girl gleefully announced. "And hug you and squeeze you and pet you and lock you in a cage and keep you forever and ever and EVER."
Chopper squeaked again. "Help!" Where were his Nakama? He had just turned his back for a second to marvel over the medical equipment...
"Oh!" She gasped, looking at him in amazement. "My cutey-wooty can talk!" She let out a squeal of joy, sentencing him to yet another one of those bone breaking hugs. "Say something again!"
"Wack." Chopper said with dignity. He was going to have to get himself out of this. He was a Pirate, he could do this. "Heavy Point!"
From his much taller vantage point, the girl was now hugging one of his arms. "Um." Chopper shook his arm slightly. "Could you let go?"
"My cuddly-wuddly got bigger!" The girl squealed, releasing his arm to glomp his waist. Or attempting to. She couldn't quite reach all the way around, but that didn't stop her from squeezing what she could, trying to force his guts out of his mouth.
Not working.
"Brain point!" He grunted in desperation, shrinking back down to his usual size and slipping out of her grasp. "Walk point!"
His now long and agile legs under him, he sprinted away from the red-headed girl as fast as he could. "Wait!!" The girl cried sorrowfully after him. "Elmyra loves her cute fuzzy-wuzzies!!! Come back!!!"
"No!" He shouted, leaping pedestrians in his way. He heard a noise not unlike an angry tiger followed by the roar of a tornado.
"Elmyra said wait! My cutey-wooty is not escaping from me that easily!!!"
"Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Chopper screamed as he saw the red-headed devil-child approach him at mind-boggling speed. "HELP~!"
"Nah?" He nearly ran over Luffy as his Captain stepped out of a nearby booth, a skewer of meat hanging partially out of his mouth. "Chopper?"
"Brain point!" Chopper turned back to his usual self, hiding behind the safety of the Captain of the Straw Hat Pirates. "Save me!"
"Huh?" Luffy intelligently inquired. He made a second inquiring sound as something hit him at a high speed, causing him to lean backwards for a moment before snapping back to a standing position, vibrating for a moment.
The red-headed girl was attached to his torso arms and legs wrapped around him in a crushing death grip. "I caught you! Naughty fuzzy-wuzzy, running from Elmyra like that!! Elmyra will have to punish her cutey-wooty when they get home!"
"Nah?" Luffy inquired, looking down at her with a blank expression on his face. "What's this?" Chopper stared up at his Captain in awe. Luffy was so brave!
Luffy shook himself, his belly bouncing back and forth, the girl still clinging to him. She laughed as she snapped from side to side as if she were on an amusement ride, her grip never faltering. Luffy looked at her for a moment, then tried shimmering from side to side.
No luck.
He tried levering himself out of her grasp, grunting as he did so.
No luck.
Luffy paused, panting for a moment.
"You're funny." The girl giggled, looking up at Luffy. "Will you be my friend? You can come back to my house and we can play dress up and tea party and I have lots and snacks and meat for us to eat! Cakes and cookies and yum-yum goodies!"
"Meat!" Luffy cheered, drool starting to slide from the corner of his mouth.
She cheered, grabbing Luffy's wrist and skipped off, casually tossing Luffy over her shoulder and back again without ever letting go of his wrist like some bizarre version of skip rope. "I love cats!" She sang happily. "I love kitties, squeeze 'em into itty-bitties!"
"Meat!" Luffy cheered every time he hit the ground. "Meat! Meat! Meat! Meat!"
Chopper stared after them, his jaw on the ground. His Captain had just been kidnapped. What should he do? He had to get the others! Or something! What would Usopp do at a time like this?!
"Chopper?" Nami's voice snapped him out of his staring. "Everything okay?" He looked up to see Nami and Sanji step out of the store Luffy had been standing in front of, Sanji carrying an armload of bags.
"N-Nami!" Chopper wailed, looking up in her in despair. "Luffy! She-"
"I saw." Nami assured him. "Don't worry Chopper. He'll be back before we leave." The ship wouldn't leave without the Captain, especially not their Captain. They were Nakama.
Sanji watched their Captain bounce out of sight. "It's not like there's anything she can do to hurt him." He added thoughtfully. "Luffy will be fine."
Chopper nodded hesitantly. This was true, Luffy had eaten the Gumu-Gumu Fruit, her hugs wouldn't hurt him like it would a normal person. And Luffy was strong, he could escape, no problem! Right!
"Yup." Nami shot him a big cheerful grin, patting the top of his hat. "And this way we don't have to worry about his snack allowance for the trip while we shop!" She added brightly, giving him a thumbs up.
"O-oi..."
-fin-
-fin-
Author: Icka! M. Chif
Series: One Piece / Tiny Toon Adventures
Word Count: 1009
Rating: General
Warnings: CRACK
Author's Note: For hoshi_ryo. She handed me this plunnie, and then it took hold about midnight. *yawns* Apologies for the lack of proper punchline.
Summary: "Wait! Elmyra loves her cute fuzzy-wuzzies!!! Come back!!!"
+++
"Aren't you just a cutey-wooty." A gleeful voice announced, right next to Chopper's ear and making him jump slightly. A short red-haired girl was staring at him with hearts in her eyes. Literal hearts in her eyes.
As Chopper jumped back and hid behind a nearby stall, breathing fast as he tried to think of a possible medical condition that could turn someone's eyes heart-shaped. Sanji-san got it occasionally too, maybe it was contagious....
"You're just the cutest-wootest cuddly-wuddly fuzzy-wuzzy ever, aren't you?" The girl cooed at him. Upon further inspection, Chopper realised that she had a tiny skull on her hair ribbon.
Unfortunately, this realisation was enough of a distraction for her to suddenly get within touching distance.
And touching distance meant 'choking distance', as Chopper suddenly found himself in a large hug that would have done a bear proud, getting the breath hugged out of him as his ribs threatened to break. "Yes you are! Yes you are!"
"Erk." Chopper managed to squeak as he was suddenly held up like a prized doll, the girl rubbing noses with him.
"I'm gonna take you home!" The girl gleefully announced. "And hug you and squeeze you and pet you and lock you in a cage and keep you forever and ever and EVER."
Chopper squeaked again. "Help!" Where were his Nakama? He had just turned his back for a second to marvel over the medical equipment...
"Oh!" She gasped, looking at him in amazement. "My cutey-wooty can talk!" She let out a squeal of joy, sentencing him to yet another one of those bone breaking hugs. "Say something again!"
"Wack." Chopper said with dignity. He was going to have to get himself out of this. He was a Pirate, he could do this. "Heavy Point!"
From his much taller vantage point, the girl was now hugging one of his arms. "Um." Chopper shook his arm slightly. "Could you let go?"
"My cuddly-wuddly got bigger!" The girl squealed, releasing his arm to glomp his waist. Or attempting to. She couldn't quite reach all the way around, but that didn't stop her from squeezing what she could, trying to force his guts out of his mouth.
Not working.
"Brain point!" He grunted in desperation, shrinking back down to his usual size and slipping out of her grasp. "Walk point!"
His now long and agile legs under him, he sprinted away from the red-headed girl as fast as he could. "Wait!!" The girl cried sorrowfully after him. "Elmyra loves her cute fuzzy-wuzzies!!! Come back!!!"
"No!" He shouted, leaping pedestrians in his way. He heard a noise not unlike an angry tiger followed by the roar of a tornado.
"Elmyra said wait! My cutey-wooty is not escaping from me that easily!!!"
"Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Chopper screamed as he saw the red-headed devil-child approach him at mind-boggling speed. "HELP~!"
"Nah?" He nearly ran over Luffy as his Captain stepped out of a nearby booth, a skewer of meat hanging partially out of his mouth. "Chopper?"
"Brain point!" Chopper turned back to his usual self, hiding behind the safety of the Captain of the Straw Hat Pirates. "Save me!"
"Huh?" Luffy intelligently inquired. He made a second inquiring sound as something hit him at a high speed, causing him to lean backwards for a moment before snapping back to a standing position, vibrating for a moment.
The red-headed girl was attached to his torso arms and legs wrapped around him in a crushing death grip. "I caught you! Naughty fuzzy-wuzzy, running from Elmyra like that!! Elmyra will have to punish her cutey-wooty when they get home!"
"Nah?" Luffy inquired, looking down at her with a blank expression on his face. "What's this?" Chopper stared up at his Captain in awe. Luffy was so brave!
Luffy shook himself, his belly bouncing back and forth, the girl still clinging to him. She laughed as she snapped from side to side as if she were on an amusement ride, her grip never faltering. Luffy looked at her for a moment, then tried shimmering from side to side.
No luck.
He tried levering himself out of her grasp, grunting as he did so.
No luck.
Luffy paused, panting for a moment.
"You're funny." The girl giggled, looking up at Luffy. "Will you be my friend? You can come back to my house and we can play dress up and tea party and I have lots and snacks and meat for us to eat! Cakes and cookies and yum-yum goodies!"
"Meat!" Luffy cheered, drool starting to slide from the corner of his mouth.
She cheered, grabbing Luffy's wrist and skipped off, casually tossing Luffy over her shoulder and back again without ever letting go of his wrist like some bizarre version of skip rope. "I love cats!" She sang happily. "I love kitties, squeeze 'em into itty-bitties!"
"Meat!" Luffy cheered every time he hit the ground. "Meat! Meat! Meat! Meat!"
Chopper stared after them, his jaw on the ground. His Captain had just been kidnapped. What should he do? He had to get the others! Or something! What would Usopp do at a time like this?!
"Chopper?" Nami's voice snapped him out of his staring. "Everything okay?" He looked up to see Nami and Sanji step out of the store Luffy had been standing in front of, Sanji carrying an armload of bags.
"N-Nami!" Chopper wailed, looking up in her in despair. "Luffy! She-"
"I saw." Nami assured him. "Don't worry Chopper. He'll be back before we leave." The ship wouldn't leave without the Captain, especially not their Captain. They were Nakama.
Sanji watched their Captain bounce out of sight. "It's not like there's anything she can do to hurt him." He added thoughtfully. "Luffy will be fine."
Chopper nodded hesitantly. This was true, Luffy had eaten the Gumu-Gumu Fruit, her hugs wouldn't hurt him like it would a normal person. And Luffy was strong, he could escape, no problem! Right!
"Yup." Nami shot him a big cheerful grin, patting the top of his hat. "And this way we don't have to worry about his snack allowance for the trip while we shop!" She added brightly, giving him a thumbs up.
"O-oi..."
-fin-
-fin-