three is company (and two is none), for everyone (2/3)
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He’s better by Friday night, although that doesn’t stop him from taking another day off work through some strategic whining at his supervisor, Joonmyun, over the phone. He spends the day filling out a kink checklist Chen’s sent him (and where on earth did Chen find one in Mandarin?) and gets a very helpful graph in response with his and Jongin’s shared kinks highlighted in red. He wonders if the second session is too soon to burst out the restraints or if that’s more of a fourth-time-fucking you thing. Someone should publish a guide for this sort of thing.
He doesn’t get to tie Jongin down but he fucks him on his hands and knees, fingers wrapped in a tight ring around the base of his shaft, taking Jongin to the edge and backing away before he can come, reveling in the sweet sounds he can pull from the other, until Jongin’s a pleading mess. Then he fucks him open, slow and precise until Jongin’s coming with a hoarse cry and Tao, remembering the watchful eye of Chen across the room pulls out and jerks himself off, knees on either side of Jongin’s head until he’s coming, painting white all along Jongin’s face, some of it getting in his hair. He’s expecting his dismissal this time around and leaves, feeling the familiar mixture of satisfaction and disappointment.
The third time is the next week, the fourth sooner than that and before Tao realises, the sessions have become a routine occurrence and he’s long gotten over the awkwardness of having Chen in the same room. At this point he practically revels in it. They’ve booked the hotel so many times now that the disembodied voice behind the frosted glass gives him a wave through the gap as he passes by and he’s pretty sure he could trace the path to their room in his sleep. He’s become intimately acquainted with all the contours of Jongin’s body, knows which spots make him gasp out and which ones he tries to hide . He also finally knows what Chen looks like when he comes, head thrown back and a delicious, bitten-off noise coming from his throat as the light illuminates his skin and Tao is irritated that he manages to look good even like this.
He’s heading over to Minseok’s, takeout bag of food swinging at his side, an apology gift for how often he’s brushed off the other man’s invitations to hang out all month. He’s humming to himself as he winds his way through the streets, hair mussed and clothes still rumpled from earlier. Jongin had met him at the hotel and said they’d be going on a small field trip. A field trip which consisted of him and Jongin fucking on Chen’s desk at his office, nearly giving the other man a heart attack when he’d walked in and upending a neatly stacked pile of essays. If the way Chen’s hand had immediately gone to his belt as he sat in his desk chair was any indication, he didn’t really mind the excuse to not finish any marking. He’d lazily tugged his clothes on afterwards, watching out of the corner of his eye as Chen pinned Jongin to the desk, tipping his head to the side so he could suck over a bruise Tao had left their minutes earlier and it almost had Tao roaring to go again. It was a new development in their arrangement that Chen no longer made Tao leave right after, letting him stay and watch but never long enough to see Jongin get fucked and it always left Tao with this burning curiosity. He’d seen the bruises around Jongin’s wrists and the way he limped afterwards, or the weekends where he wouldn’t come stumbling back into their apartment til the wee hours of the morning. It was one way he was reminded that he was nothing more than a guest in their world, lines that blurred close sometimes when Jongin leaned against him while he cooked breakfast or held his hand on the subway. More and more he feels like he needs that reality check.
He takes the elevator up to Minseok’s apartment, checking his phone as he waits. He has a new text from Jongin, a picture of Jjangah with her head stuck in a plastic container and he smiles fondly, the ding from the elevator pulling him out of his thoughts. He makes his way down the hall to the apartment, frowning when he sees the door is unlocked and he pushes it open, shouting out a greeting.
And then promptly slams it shut again because Luhan, Minseok, hands on unmentionables and good god Tao really needs to learn how to knock.
He has a feeling Minseok is mad at him when he’s left to stand there for the next ten minutes until the door opens and Luhan comes stumbling out, shirt half-off and a dopey grin on his face. He ruffles his hair as he passes by and Tao half expects him to burst into song, Disney movie style ( Today My Prince Made Me Come maybe.) Minseok appears at the door, shirtless and with a pocky stick held between his lips. “Hello stranger.”
Tao ducks his head, feeling like he’s being silently reprimanded. “Hi, hyung,” he says sheepishly, scratching at his head with his free hand. “Can I come in?"
Minseok shrugs. “Do what you want.” He walks inside and Tao follows, placing the takeout bag on the counter. “You’re mad at me, aren’t you?”
“Well, you’ve done nothing but avoid me all month so yes, I’m not too enamoured with you right now.” Minseok takes another pocky stick out, clamping it between his teeth. He catches Tao’s gaze and shrugs. ‘Trying to give up smoking.”
“I’m glad.” Tao brings over a plate, making sure to stack the biggest pieces of galbi on Minseok’s plate. All this barbecue is going to put a major dent in his spending money but it’s worth it if it gets Minseok to like him again. Minseok grudgingly reach out for the proffered food, frowning when Tao pulls away at the last second. “Say you forgive me first.”
“You brat.” Minseok makes another grab for the food and Tao holds it high over his head. Minseok hmphs and turns over to lie on his side, back facing him. “I don’t want it anymore, go away.”
“Come on, hyung.” Tao whines putting the food down and pressing alongside Minseok till they’re spooning with Minseok’s face smushed against the back of the couch. “I wasn’t avoiding you on purpose, I swear. I had a lot of work, I’ve barely had any time to myself all month. I had to skip my haircut, for chrissake.” Tao tugs one of Minseok’s arms free and brings it to his head. “See? Split ends everywhere.”
He feels the vibrations of Minseok’s laugh as he tries to stifle it against the cushion and he smiles, knowing he’s won this round. Minseok rolls over until they’re nose to nose, reaching over to smooth his fingers through Tao’s hair. “You’re incorrigible.”
“You love me anyways.” Tao preens and Minseok sighs, sitting up and reaching for the food. “God knows why.” He stuff a piece of beef in his mouth, fingers sticky with sauce before reaching over to feed him one. “So, tell me about work, and why it’s keeping you busy.”
They talk and eat and Tao realises how much he’s missed being in the company of someone without the constant snark (Chen) or butterflies in his stomach (Jongin). Minseok is the right amount of teasing and attentive and it leaves Tao feeling more at ease than he has all month and in a rare moment of weakness, as he’s staring at the top of Minseok’s head from where it’s leaning against his chest, he wishes he could do this with Jongin. He banishes that thought as fast as it appears.
Minseok stretches, hand coming to rest on Tao’s stomach, fingers skimming absently along his skin and Tao tenses unconsciously. Normally, this would be the prelude to sex for them and he isn’t technically in any kind of exclusive relationship with Chen and Jongin, but it still feels wrong and he pulls away. Minseok says nothing but withdraws his hand, bringing it up to rest on Tao’s shoulder instead and they don’t mention it. Tao leaves once the show is over, he has reports to write and legal concepts to brush up on and Minseok doesn’t protest, merely pulling him into a bear hug and threatening to burn his eyebrows off if he ignores him for so long again.
Chen is home when he gets there, the stack of marking from earlier set out in front of him at the dining table as he flips through papers. Tao hesitates before bringing his own files over, sliding across from him quietly. Chen doesn’t give any indication that he’s noticed but he draws his legs back so Tao can fit his under the table. They work quietly, room punctuated with the quiet sound of pen over paper and the stapler clicking together .Chen speaks first, sighing lowly as he pushes his chair back slightly. “Why the hell did I go into teaching again?”
Tao smiles to himself. He’d sooner eat a pound of lemons than admit it but Chen sounds cuter when he’s being whiny. “To spread the joy of learning and Chinese culture of course.” He laughs when he hears Chen snorts, shoving his seat back and pushing his files away. “And because it beats interning.”
“I’ll say.” Chen runs his finger along the spines of the files. “I’m surprised you don’t have carpal tunnel yet from all the stapling.”
“Give me two more months and I’ll be jerking off left-handed.” Tao stands. “Do you want a drink?” Chen nods and Tao brings two water bottles over and one of his precious boxes of almond biscuits. Chen mocks gasps when he sees it, already reaching over to rip off the cellophane. “You sharing snacks? Is there a blue moon forecasted for tonight?”
“Shut up and take some before I change my mind.”
They eat in silence before Chen speaks next. “So what’d you do after you left the hotel?”
“Went to visit Minseok hyung.” Tao mumbles, cheeks stuffed with almond cookies . He pauses mid-chew when he sees Chen’s eyes go hard and swallows slowly.
Chen is good at guarding his emotions but by now Tao can tell that whenever he gets that blank expression, it means he’s mad and he doesn’t know why that makes him feel nervous. Chen’s voice is cold when he speaks. “Did you two fuck?”
Tao shakes his head vehemently. “No! I mean- when I came he was with someone else doing- ” he makes a vague hand gesture, “and later- I didn’t want to because I’ve only been with Jong- you two for a while and I didn’t want to risk anything...Minseok and I use condoms but I still didn’t.”
He can tell he’s said the right thing, no matter how poorly articulated because Chen’s eyes soften and the corner of his lips quirk up a little bit. Tao releases the tension he didn’t realize he’d gotten in his shoulders, popping another cookie in his mouth and getting started on the next round of filing. Chen resumes his marking, stretching his leg out until it brushes up against Tao’s, shifting so they’re intertwined. Neither of them speak again for the next little while but the atmosphere is comfortable and Tao is content.
***
“Tao! They’re calling us into the conference room.” Sehun runs his fingers through his hair, trying to flatten down a stubborn cowlick. Tao curses, reaching for the suit jacket he’d tossed aside earlier and shrugging it on. He nudges Sehun with his hip. “Budge over, I need to see myself.” He does a quick hair and teeth check before following Sehun to the conference room. The other three interns are already waiting and they take their place at the end of the line. Sulli, the pretty intern with the long brown hair and passion for Tort gives him nervous smile that he returns before the door opens and they all stiffen. Joonmyun walks in front of them and they all bow in sync. Joonmyun smiles at them. “Hello everyone. I’m going to spare you all the anxiety and tell you that this meeting has been called to announce the results of your evaluations. All you have worked incredibly hard these past few months and should take pride in the growth you’ve shown. I’ve discussed with your supervisors and co-workers and we’ll be taking three of you on as paralegals.” He looks down at the sheet in his hands. “Firstly, there is Miss Choi. Congratulations.”
Tao claps along with the others, mouth dry as Sulli beams beside him. The next person announced is Sehun and he lets out a little whoop before clapping his hand over his mouth. Finally Joonmyun pauses, and Tao wants to punch him, who does he think he is with these dramatic pauses, Alex Trebek? He’s caught off guard when everyone starts clapping again and the others are looking over at him. He catches Sehun’s eye and the other gives him a thumb up, eye twinkling and oh shit, Tao got the position.
He saves his jubilation til they're out of the office, stopping to bow to every senior giving big bear hugs to Niel and Wooyoung, the other two interns. He and Sehun walk arm in arm out of the office, singing at the top of their lungs, ties tugged loose and faces red. Sehun loops an arm around his waist as they stand on the subway platform. “We should go out this weekend and celebrate. I bet we could sucker Baekhyun hyung into buying drinks.”
“Sounds good, text me the details.” Tao gives him a tight squeeze as his train pulls into the station. He spends the entire ride back high on happiness, to the point where even the umbrella poking his thigh can’t put a damper on his joy. He’s hyped, full of energy like he hasn't been in a long while, bounding up the stairs to the apartment in lieu of the elevators. Jongin looks surprised when he sees Tao in the front door, sweating and with a huge smile over his face. He squeals when Tao picks him up and spin him around in a circle giddily, collapsing on the couch with Jongin atop him. The other boy laughs. “What was all that about?”
“You know the evaluations I told you about? When they’d decide who gets hired at the firm?” Jongin nods affirmatively before his eyes widen and then he’s yelling too, pulling Tao into a hug and it’s soft and lovely and Tao’s just so goddamned happy right now.
Jongin pulls away, hands still cupping his face. “We need to celebrate,” he insists, getting off Tao’s lap.” Go change, I’ll treat you to lunch.”
“You don’t have to.” he insists but Jongin merely pushes him towards the bathroom and Tao acquiesces. They walk to a nearby samgyupsal restaurant and the owner greets Jongin warmly before ushering them to a low table. They grill the meat, Jongin repeatedly slapping Tao’s hand away as he tries to take a few off early. Once the meat’s prepared, Jongin makes him a lettuce wrap, reaching over to feed it to him. Tao feels his heart pick up at the soft brush of Jongin’s fingertips against his lower lip and he wants to keep his hand there when the other pulls away. There’s a large bruise on the inside of Jongin’s arm and Tao winces, reaching over to trace it. ”That looks bad, what happened?”
“This? I was helping one of the kids at the studio with her pirouettes and she knocked me into the barre.” Jongin shrugs. “Occupational hazard.”
“You know, I’ve never seen you at the studio.” Tao muses, dipping his meat in the sesame paste. “You’ve been to my firm, we’ve seen Chen’s office-” he pointedly ignores Jongin’s smirk. ”But I’ve never seen you in your element.”
Jongin hums, tipping his head to the side. “The studios on the way home, maybe we can drop by and I can show you.”
They take a detour after leaving the restaurant, Jongin leading Tao down several side-alleys and through a park before they reach a small studio tucked away in the corner of a narrow street. The inside smells like wood polish and sweat and takes him back to childhood training sessions at the temple. Jongin waves to the receptionist at the counter and leads Tao past several rooms where classes are being taught, from toddlers bobbing along with their parents to the beat to elderly women doing zumba training that makes him feel tired just from watching. There’s a small room at the end of the hall which smells like mildew and musty air when Jongin flicks on the light, the fluorescent light bulb flickering and the paint peeling off the walls. Jongin gives Tao a sheepish smile. “This is my room for now, its not much. I want to renovate but there’s no money right now.”
“I like it.” And Tao does, as he looks around, noting that although the floor is cracked and lacks the polished finish of those in the other rooms, it’s clean and so is the mirror and the barre, evidence of a loving devotion to the space by its owner. Here and there a few framed prints of ballerinas hang and Tao steps closer to the one nearest him. It’s a ballerina poised on one leg, face placid and muscles tensed in a way that leave Tao in awe at the sheer mastery and strength. Jongin comes up behind him, propping his chin on his shoulder and Tao hunches down, to make it easier. “That’s Misty Copeland.” Jongin says voice dreamy. “She’s a ballet prodigy and one of my idols.”
“You sound like you’re talking about a crush.” Tao laughs and Jongin blows in his ear in retaliation. “Shut up, it’s not like that. I just really admire her as a dancer.”
“Speaking of, I thought you brought me here to show me your moves.” Jongin grins and pushes Tao up against the wall. “Man the stereo.”
Jongin selects a song and Tao presses play into once he’s taken his position in the center of the room. Jongin waits a few beats before he begins to move and Tao is entranced. It’s like sweet, childish Jongin with his playful nature and quirks transforms into this sensual, powerful being who moves across the floor, movements fluid and controlled as he turns and extends, an enrapturing display of rhythm and movement. It’s a peek into a different side of Jongin, one Tao had never seen till now and he feels honoured to get to see this. He applauds as the music fades and Jongin is panting, bent in half as he tries to catch his breath and he laughs, ducking his head bashfully as Tao slings an arm around him. “That was amazing!”
“I didn’t have my shoes and I was just freestyling-”Jongin tries to protest but Tao shushes him loudly, drowning out his protests until a laughing Jongin drags him out of the room, flicking the lights off as they go. Tao continues to gush over him, drawing the amused stares of passers-by. “Seriously Jongin, what on earth are you doing teaching, you should be on stage as a pita ballerina or whatever it’s called.”
Jongin bursts out laughing, stopping them in the middle of the sidewalk as he covers his mouth with one palm. “ Prima ballerina you dummy and that term isn’t used for male soloists.” They continue down the sidewalk, Jongin elongating his steps to avoid touching the cracks and Tao stifles a smile. “I almost was actually, I trained with the Korea National Ballet for six years.” He spots an ice cream van and takes Tao’s hand dragging him in its direction. “C’mon, I’ll treat you.”
“So, wait,” Tao continues once they’re seated on a bench and biting into vanilla cones. “You were basically the next great Primark ballerina. Why did you quit?”
“Prima.“Jongin emphasizes before shrugging. “Well, ballet was my dream since I was a kid and I started tagging along with my sisters to classes before formally attending. I got selected to go train when I was teenager and from that age on I worked with some of the best choreographers and teachers in the business, getting good roles in the annual shows... They were grooming me as their next great male soloist and I don’t know… at some point it go to me .I was working 20 hour days rehearsing and training, they had me on diets, couldn’t see my family and it was hard to make friends when you know everyone’s secretly wishing for you to break your ankle during a lift so they can have a chance at your spot.” He smiles softly. “I dropped out after a breakdown that led to two weeks of hospitalization.” He snorts softly. “Ironically enough, that’s how I met Chen.”
Well, this is intriguing. Chen and Jongin have never divulged details of their relationship back story to Tao, giving purposefully vague answers or brushing him off entirely. He nods, encouraging Jongin to elaborate.
Jongin stretches his arms over his head, arching his neck to one side. “It was around Christmas season. I was the male lead selected for The Nutcracker, it was my first major soloist role. Too much pressure, too little rest, I ended up collapsing in rehearsal and was hospitalized for exhaustion. Chen’s boyfriend at the time was in the bed beside me. We used to talk a lot since his boyfriend was drugged up most of the time and after his boyfriend got out, Chen kept coming to talk to me and it kind of just continued from there. He was the one who helped me realize that I was miserable in the professional ballet world and he let me bum off him for a few months when I dropped out and was trying to get teaching qualifications. We ended up dating and the rest is history.” Jongin pops the last piece of the cone in his mouth, eyes scrunching as chews. “It’s not glamorous or anything but I really enjoy teaching. People from the company still mock me, you know? Talk about me being weak and how if I’d wanted to be a teacher, I could’ve done that at the end of my professional career, become a professor with the National Ballet. But I really don’t care. Most of my kids are never going to be prima ballerinas, they don’t have the right look or height or skill and I know it. But Misty Copeland-she started training at thirteen and no one thought she’d make it but look at her now. Maybe I will train a star amongst my kids or maybe I’ll just instill a love of dance in them. Either way, I’m satisfied with what I have.”
Tao is speechless as he stares at Jongin’s profile. It’s easy to forget that Jongin isn’t some naive, happy-go-lucky child coasting through life through his smile and likeable personality, there’s a strength and maturity to his character that Tao maybe doesn’t appreciate enough.
“So,” Jongin says when they’re making their way across the park, arms brushing as they walk. “I’ve shown you my skills, when am I going to get to see yours?”
“What talents? I can recite all the articles of the Sale of Goods Act but I doubt that’ll interest you.”
“Not that.” Jongin mimes flipping something, ending with an exaggerated karate yell. “Wushu!”
Tao narrows his eyes at him. “How did you find out?”
Jongin chuckles, nervously scratching at his scalp. “I was putting your laundry away for you- organized your sock drawer by the way- and I found one of your medals in the drawer. You were good.”
Tao shrugs. “I did it for almost thirteen years, my dad got me into it. I wanted to go professional but after my dad passed away, I thought it was best for my mom if I went to law school.”
“And why Korea? Why not do law in China?” Jongin takes his hand and tugs him around a group of schoolgirls. He leaves them intertwined and Tao savours the warmth of the small palm against his own.
“I guess- I just wanted to run away for a while. I was in a bad place after my dad died and I needed to escape. Korea was the closest and when I got the scholarship, I jumped at it.”
Jongin hmms. "Well, the circumstances might not have been the best but I’m glad you came here.” He gives his hand a small squeeze and Tao grins, squeezing back. They’re at their apartment building and the landlord waves to them as they walk by.
“So, since you’re like this wushu grandmaster,” Jongin says in the elevator, head resting on Tao’s shoulder. “Can you do, like, flips and shit?"
Tao laughs. “I can use nunchucks too.”
“Holy shit.” Jongin’s eyes are wide as he stares up at him, the ding of the elevator echoing as they reach their floor. “Can you show me?”
“Tag along with me the next time I go to the gym.” They reach the door and Tao starts fishing for his keys. He’s just fitted them in when the door opens and he’s staring down at Chen’s smug face, powdered sugar smeared across his lips and down his front as he chews a doughnut. “Honey, you’re home.” he croons and Tao hmphs, pushing past him, Jongin on his heels. He hears giggling from behind him and a high-pitched squeak and when he faces them again after toeing his shoes off, Jongin now has a smear of powdered white across his top lip.
“How on earth did you even get in while we were both gone?” he grumbles, folding his arms. Chen shrugs. “Jongin made me a key.”
Jongin withers under Tao’s disapproving gaze. “I thought’d be okay. I should've asked, sorry.”
“I don’t know why you’re so grouchy, Zitao,” Chen licks powdered sugar off his fingers. ” It’s not like we don’t already know each other intimately .”
That does it. Tao turns to give Jongin a big smile as he moves closer to Chen. “Hey, remember when I told you I could do flips?” Jongin furrows his eyebrows in confusion. "Yeah?”
“I can also flip other people. Here let me demonstrate.” Chen lets out a yell as Tao suddenly grabs his waist and tosses him over one shoulder . It’s a modified version of the one he’d use in combat but he’ll make some allowances for tiny, irritants. It’s still gratifying to see Chen squirm and curse, kicking out until Tao drops him to the floor. He glares up at him from where he’s collapsed, legs akimbo, letting out a string of curses in Mandarin insulting Tao’s mother, appearance and implying that he was born outside of holy matrimony. Tao blows him a two-fingered kiss then skitters away to his room before Chen can get back up and track him down.
***
The air is thick with cigarette smoke and sweat and the bar counter feels sticky under his cheek as he rests against the cool surface. The bartender frowns, reaching over to lift his head up and slide a napkin underneath. “I think you’re done for the night, didi”
"But Yijing ge ” Tao slurs, lifting his head up to stare at the other man imploringly. “I’m fiiiine.”
The cute bartender with the Changsha accent who Tao had befriended two hours ago after the other had saved him from slamming face first into a table flicks a towel at his head. “It’s Yixing and no you’re not fine. Where are the friends you came with?”
“My co-workers?” Tao looks around the bar. Sulli is in the corner, top three buttons of her blouse undone and chatting with an older-looking guy with a moustache as a jealous Niel looks on. Sehun is playing pool in the corner with a few other people, sleeves rolled up as he lines up his cue and Tao swallows, turning away. “I think I’ll head out now.” He tries to stand and groans when he floor starts spinning. Yixing grabs his arm, steadying him. "Wait, I’ll call you a cab. Don’t you dare try walking home in this state.”
Tao nods in agreement, collecting his jacket and depositing a few bills in Yixing’s tip jar. He tenses when he feels someone slide beside him and twists to see Sehun at his side. “Hey.”
“Hi.” Tao fidgets, one eye on the entrance, waiting for an orange car to pull up so he can make his escape. Sehun frowns, looking down at his jacket. “You’re leaving already?”
“Yeah, I have to get up early tomorrow and… skype with my great aunt.” Tao chuckles nervously, trying not to wilt under Sehun frown. “But it was fun, thanks for inviting me! There’s my taxi, gotta go.”
“Tao.” Sehun catches his arm before he can leave, and Tao groans internally. Sehun looks concerned, mouth turned down at the corners. “Is this about earlier?”
Ah, yes.Earlier. Earlier when they’d been alone in a booth, both four shots in and Sehun had leaned in and kissed him and a giggly, inebriated Tao had climbed into his lap and they’d made out until Sehun’s hands strayed to the hem of his t-shirt and Tao had jerked away in alarm, apologizing profusely as he’d stumbled away.
“No, that was nothing, both of us were- are- drunk.” Tao laughs airily, trying to extricate his arm. “I probably won’t even remember it by tomorrow.”
Sehun opens his mouth to speak again right as the taxi driver honks loudly and Tao yanks himself free and all but runs to the exit, sliding into the backseat of the cab and quickly rattling off his address to the driver. He rolls the window down, letting the cool air clear some of the fog surrounding his mind and he feels a bit less like he’s going to puke out all his internal organs by the time they pull up to the apartment.
He’d left in a hurry earlier, eager to get out of the apartment and escape Jongin and Chen’s insufferable loving-couple antics, Jongin draping himself over his boyfriend's back, connected by shared headphones as the latter scrolled through buzzfeed articles on his laptop, both of them laughing and teasing and the entire scene had been entirely too domestic and comfortable so Tao had chosen to leave early rather than skulk around his own damn home feeling like a third wheel.
He cautiously opens the door, straining to hear any sounds that might indicate copulation (See? He’s learning.) There’s only the muted din of the tv and he steps inside, kicking his shoes off as he goes to the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of water which he takes to the living room. Jongin and Chen are on the couch, Jongin resting his cheek in his palm as he glares at an oblivious Chen who’s absorbed in his phone. Jongin pats the seat beside him and Tao only hesitates briefly before heading over. The other sighs and leans against his arm. “How was your night?” he sniffs Tao, wrinkling his nose. “Are you using a new cologne or something?’
Sehun. Tao swallows and shakes his head. "No, it must be my co-worker’s, he was spraying it all over the place. My night was good. Boozy mostly. What about you two?”
“Well,” Jongin’s tone is ice, expression sour. “We were supposed to have a nice night in and watch a movie but somebody missed that memo.”
“For fucks sake, would you cut it out with the passive-aggressive bullshit?” Chen’s voice is sharp and Tao sees Jongin flinch, his back still facing his boyfriend. “I told you, there’s been an issue with the mid-term results and Yifan needs my help.”
“Yifan always fucking needs your help, this happens every fucking time we try to do something together," Jongin snaps back and Chen just sighs and shakes his head, going back to his phone. The tension in the air is palpable and Tao wants nothing more than to slink away but Jongin fixes him with a Look, implying a world of pain for him if he dares move and it’s honestly quite terrifying. So there he is, half-focusing on the movie and half waiting for another outburst. He’s almost dozed off entirely, when he feels a soft pressure on his knee. Jongin is staring straight ahead, eyes affixed on the screen as he mindlessly rubs circles into Tao’s thighs and he relaxes, eyes drooping shut once again.
They shoot open again when he feels Jongin deliberately palm him through his jeans and he buck his hips, trying to shift away but Jongin just brings up a leg, resting his thigh on top of Tao’s and keeping him pinned as his ministrations get stronger, Tao’s cock responding to the pressure and the friction and he bites his lip, trying to muffle the small groan working it’s way up his throat. He’s not sure what exactly Jongin is up to and this is far beyond the realm of their normal sexual setup but Tao’s not complaining. He leans back against the couch and sighs softly, letting the sensations take over.
He lets out an embarrassing moan that he quickly tries to pass off as a cough. Chen looks up from his phone, giving him a strange look before returning to his work and Jongin gives Tao a small smirk as he tugs Tao’s zipper down the rest of the way, pulling his cock out through the slit in his boxers, bringing his hand to his mouth and his palm is slick when he replaces it. He begins to stroke, slow teasing movements, thumb coming up to press into the slit and smear precome over the head, making everything wetter and messier, the squelch of wet skin against skin barely drowned out by the sounds from the tv and Tao tenses, terrified that any moment Chen will turn his head and see but at the same time wanting him too. There’s something deliciously illicit about this and it just serves to make him harder, make his hips stutter as he tries to thrust up into Jongin’s grip, muffling his moans all the while.
Jongin is still looking away, eyes flitting from the tv to Chen and his boyfriend’s obliviousness seems to displease him because the next thing Tao feels is Jongin’s elbow digging into his thigh as he bends over and a warm wet heat envelops him. He can’t control his sounds this time, a long low moan echoing around the room as Jongin takes him lower, tongue flicking against the ridge, tracing patterns along the underside and Tao almost loses it, right there and then when Jongin tilts his head to look at him, eyes bright and lips stretched, pink and pretty around his girth and it’s fucking obscene .
He’s almost forgotten the presence of a third party on the couch when suddenly the heat around his cock is gone and he whines in tandem with Jongin. The dancer’s back is arched, head wrenched back as Chen tugs him down, hand fisted in his hair, the other holding his arms. He lets out a low laugh, lips skirting the shell of Jongin’s ear and Tao can see it, the shift from Jongin the minx to the soft, pliant sub under Chen’s touch. “Really, Jonginnie?” Chen’s tone is amused as he tips Jongin’s head back further. “You were that desperate for my attention?” He suddenly pushes Jongin down roughly, till his face is hovering over Tao’s cock, breaths ghosting over the head and making it twitch and spit out precome. “Or are you just that needy for cock, my pretty little slut?”
Jongin gasps and tries to arch up. “Dae, please.” he begs.
“No.” Chen holds him there. “Haven’t I taught you better than this, hmm? You’re not going to leave Zitao all worked up are you?” He runs his hand along Jongin’s back. “You that thirsty for come? Want it that fucking bad? Then finish what you started.” His hand slides to the front, giving Jongin’s crotch a small rub. “If you do well, maybe you’ll get rewarded.”
And then Jongin’s mouth is back on his cock and he’s sucking with enough force to make Tao cry out, mind going blank as he’s overcome by sensation, the burning thrum in his veins building in intensity and he’s gasping out, every inch of his self-control being used to keep himself still as Jongin takes him lower. He starts when he feels Chen shift closer till their sides are pressed together, the other leaning his head down on Tao’s shoulder and this is unnerving, he and Chen don’t touch during sessions, it’s their unspoken rule and yet here he is, lips curled up as he watches his boyfriend deepthroat Tao. “Feels good, doesn't it?” Chen traces his finger along Jongin’s lips, where they’re wrapped around his cock and Tao whimpers, whether from the close proximity or Jongin bringing a hand up to fondle his balls, he doesn’t know. “Got such perfect little cocksucker lips. And the best part.” He pushes Jongin’s head down until Tao’s whole cock is buried down his throat, the fluttering muscles making him cry out and thrust up as Jongin chokes, eyes watering as Chen holds his head down for a few seconds before letting Jongin pull off and cough, wet gasps as a few tears run down his face. “Barely any gag reflex.”
Between Jongin’s mouth and Chen’s filthy words, Tao can’t hold back much longer and he gasps out. “I’m going to- Jongin move.” But the other takes him in further, hand wrapping around what he can't fit and all it takes is one hard suck, one flick of tongue and Tao is coming for what feels like minutes, pouring his release into the welcoming chalice of Jongin’s mouth until he’s lightheaded, body feeling weightless. Jongin pulls off, pressing a kiss to the head and Chen chuckles, fingers taking hold of Jongin’s chin, tipping his head up. “Let’s see it.”
Jongin opens his mouth, revealing the liquid still within and Tao moans, the sight almost enough to stir him again. Chen traces his thumb along Jongin’s jaw, wiping up a few traces of come that have dribbled out, bringing it up to suck into his mouth. He smiles. “Tastes good. Drink up, baby.” And Jongin swallows obediently, eyes bright and shiny, tears still clinging to the edge of his lashes and god, he looks so fucking wrecked and beautiful like this.
“Sit on his lap. Clothes off,” Chen orders and Jongin gets to his feet on unsteady legs, hands trembling as he fumbles with the belt buckle so Tao reaches over and undoes it for him, earning a small smile. They strip him out of his jeans and underwear and then Jongin’s crawling onto his lap, knees bracketing Tao’s hips as he peels his shirt off and shivers slightly in the cool air of the room, goosebumps breaking out along his arms. Tao rubs at the skin gently, leaning forward to press soft kisses into the sharp jut of his collarbones. There’s the sound of a cap opening and then Chen is there, pressing himself along Jongin’s back as his fingers disappear between his legs and Jongin shudders spreading them wider and leaning forward till his head is pressed against Tao’s chest, stifling small moans against the fabric of his shirt.
Chen is quick and efficient with his preparation, sliding two lube slick fingers in without preamble and scissoring, faster than Tao probably would’ve done but Jongin seems to revel in the roughness, fucking his hips back in smooth waves, breathing laboured. Chen catches Tao’s eye and tilts his head towards the panting boy in his lap. “Play with him.”
So he drags his fingers along Jongin’s sides, scratching lightly down his back and earning an approving hum from Chen that makes him flush with warmth. He finds a nipple and rolls it between his fingers, slow scrapes of his nail around the areola, admiring the flush painting Jongin’s chest. Red always looks so good on him. Adding a third finger, Chen looks up at Tao. “How thick are these walls?”
“Not very.”
Chen hums thoughtfully, crooking his fingers up in a way that must be perfect for Jongin as the latter starts riding back hard, mouth dropped open and hands trembling. “Give him your fingers. Keep him quiet unless you want your neighbours to get an earful.” He presses a kiss to Jongins shoulder, tone mocking. “Although this one would probably love that.”
Tao presses three of his fingers to soft, plush lips which part and take him in and not a moment too soon as Jongin begins to let out high pitched keens, drooling over the digits in his mouth as he tries to keep quiet, face streaked with saliva, tears and traces of Tao’s come and he looks so breathtaking like this. Tao soothes him, whispers sweet nothings in his ear as Chen pulls his fingers out and goes to unzip his pants. And Tao can’t deny he’s anticipating this, has wanted for so long to see what Chen and Jongin do together, has already seen Chen reduce Jongin to this glazed-eye mess with just his fingers and his words, can’t begin to imagine what he could do with his cock.
He slides in easily, eliciting a small mewl and barely gives Jongin any time to adjust before he begins fucking into him hard, the loud, filthy slap of skin against skin echoing around the room and Jongin’s keens adding to the soundtrack, the force of the thrusts sending him further into Tao’s lap as he pants against his neck. There’s care in the way Chen treats him though, the soft slide of his hand up his back, the other never taking his eyes off Jongin and it’s lewd and lustful but so loving at the same time, the way Jongin closes his eyes and arches into Chen’s touch, the movement of their bodies, an ease that comes with familiarity and trust and it leaves Tao feeling lost, left out even as he kisses Jongin because he’s an outsider to this, he will always be an outsider to this and no matter how much he tries to delude himself, this is his reality. But he just screws his eyes shut, feels the slick press of Jongin’s tongue against his and lets himself indulge in denial a bit longer because if there’s one thing Tao’s always run away from, it’s the truth.
Chen comes not long after, a melodious lilt to his moan as he grinds out his release, hand coming to take Jongin’s cock in his hand and stroke him. He sees Tao’s cock, hard once again from the display he’s witnessed and laughs, reaching over to wrap his fingers around them both, jerking them to a slow, burning orgasm that leave Tao feeling weak and a little bit empty. They stay like that, the three of them on the couch, an exhausted Jongin pressed between them before Chen pulls away, tucking himself back into his pants and helping Jongin off Tao, the two of them maneuvering him into a lying position on the couch. Chen kisses him soft and slow, hand cupping his jaw, a marked contrast to earlier and he murmurs softly to a sleepy Jongin, running fingers through his hair. “You were so good baby, so perfect.” Jongin smiles, happy and sated and Tao wants to leave, feels like he’s intruding on a private moment . Then Chen’s looking at him, an expression devoid of his usual teasing and he reaches over and ruffles Tao’s hair. “You were good, too.” His face is close and Tao suddenly wants him to pull them together, wants to be kissed the same way Jongin had. It’s an unnerving thought and he stands too quickly, clearing his throat loudly and it echoes in the silent space. “I’m going to go clean up.” he gestures to the front of his stained shirt. “Do you need anything?”
Chen shakes his head slowly, a small smile on his face as he looks down at Jongin who’s asleep, hand intertwined in his. “We’re good.”
It’s a completely innocuous statement, but it feels like rejection.
***
He’s spending his first day as a paralegal hiding in the staff bathrooms to avoid a certain blond co-worker. A part of him knows he’s being ridiculous, it’s just Sehun for chrissakes but Tao’s feeling emotionally wrung out and just wants one peaceful day, is that too much to ask? He groans as he checks the time, five minutes till he has to report to Joonmyun and be assigned his cubicle. He exits the stall and peeks carefully outside the door before leaving the bathroom. The floor is still mostly empty and he manages to make his way to Joonmyun’’s office with relative ease.
“Ah, Tao, good you’re here.” Joonmyun looks up from his desk and the figure in front of him twists to look and god fucking dammnit .
“Reporting for duty, sir.” Tao chuckles weakly, trying to avoid Sehun’s eyes as he gingerly stands near the desk, feeling Sehun’s gaze on him. Joonmyun is oblivious to the tension, sliding a piece of paper across to him. “Okay, your cubicles will be in the northwest corner on the second floor. Not much of a view but you get prime access to the coffee machine.” he gives them both a cheery smile. “You two will be neighbours!”
Tao is going to puke but he manages to paste a smile on and bow as he and Sehun leave the office and head to the elevators. Sehun turns to him as soon as the doors close and Tao curses internally, willing the damn thing to move faster. It ends up stalling with a loud screech because the universe likes to pull this kind of shit with him.
“We should call the lobby.” he mumbles, reaching for the elevator phone but Sehun steps in front of him, blocking his way. “Sehun…”
“I’m sorry.” Sehun blurts out and Tao stops trying to reach around him. Sehun looks like a kicked puppy, eyes downcast and hands fisted at his side and Tao feels a slight pang of guilt. “I shouldn’t have kissed you on Saturday. You were drunk and I took advantage of you.”
“What? No Sehun, it wasn’t like that- I just…” Tao trails off, trying to find the right words. "I was just lonely, I guess and you- well you’re good looking and I don’t find you repulsive so it seemed like a good idea.”
Flushing, Sehun peeks up, meeting his eyes. “You think I’m good looking?”
“You’re okay. When you’re not doing your waffle iron face anyways.” Tao teases and the tension abates, Sehun making a face at him before smiling and it really is amazing how it changes his whole demeanour, makes him look younger. The elevator starts moving again and they both lean against the rail, waiting.
“Um, but Tao.” Sehun is still fiddling with his fingers as he speaks."I really do like you and if you want to, I’d like to take you out.”
“Oh.” Tao wasn’t expecting this. “I don’t,” He thinks of Jongin and Chen and then the image of the two of them sleeping together on the couch this morning pops into his mind and fuck it “-see why not.” he finishes and Sehun stop fidgeting, face lighting up with glee and Tao can’t help but laugh. The elevator doors open and they disembark, heading to the two back-to-back cubicles by the corner of the office. Tao critically eyes the small desk and chair, already plotting decorations in his head. Sehun pokes his head over the dividing wall. “So, is this Friday okay? We can get dinner.”
“Huh? Oh, sure.” Tao returns Sehun’s smile. “Yeah, of course.”
Paralegal work, Tao discovers, isn’t all that different from intern work in the sense that it’s mostly pointless and dreary, except he’s spending more time doing said pointless work in a sitting position. By the end of the day, he has a sore tailbone and a significantly higher score on Candy Crush than any productive person should. He’s en route to the house when he gets a text. Jongin sends him a simple one line message saying “Saturday” with a winky face emoji, their usual session code. Tao’s about to respond in the affirmative, fingers moving on automatic when he pauses right before pressing “Send.” He deletes the message, sending off instead a simple “I can’t.”
The reply is swift. “How come?” There’s a sticker of a sad puppy right after and Tao groans, leaning his head against the subway pole. Damn Jongin and his adorable texting habits. He considers making up an excuse, but the selfish part of him wins out and texts back “I have a date.”
He’s greeted by a stony silence when he gets back to the apartment, Jongin not even looking up from his laptop as he drones out a greeting. All of Tao’s attempts at conversation get monosyllabic responses and he gives up when even Jjangah barks at his attempts at play. He retreats to his room instead. There’s a muted din outside that he can hear Jongin murmuring to Jjangah, the scrape of the door opening when Chen comes in, the hushed tones of their voices outside his door before the sounds of footsteps walking away. He rolls onto his side, clamping a pillow over his exposed ear and trying to tune it out.
He’s given the cold shoulder for three days, Jongin ignoring his existence or only acknowledging him with monosyllabic replies when he has to. Chen is unfortunately less silent with his disdain, comments ranging from sarcastic to borderline vicious and Tao feels exposed, like there’s talons digging into the softness of his belly and it isn’t long before there’s a shouting match in the kitchen, loud Mandarin echoing off the walls. The neighbours complain, the landlord comes upstairs and Tao has Chen kicked out, it’s not like the fucker is a legal tenant anyways. Jongin is none too pleased and only glares at him before retreating to his room.
Given the tranquility of his home environment, it’s unsurprising that Tao is a bedraggled mess the day of his date, nerves on edge and one more fuck-up away from either breaking everything in sight or crying (probably the latter). Sehun, bless his soul, is clearly a braver man than Tao’s ever given him credit for as he ignores Tao’s uncombed hair and bloodshot eyes when they meet in the lobby after work, only reaching for Tao’s arm as they go down the metro steps and Tao lets him. It feels nice to have someone to lean on as the train rockets from the station. Sehun is sweet and a gentleman and holds the door open for Tao when they get to the restaurant. He keeps up a stream of pleasant chatter throughout, and it’s easy to converse, laugh at jokes and poke at his food. Sehun looks radiant under the chandelier light and Tao can feel the envious stares of other patrons and it’s all so perfect and Tao should be content with this, with Sehun’s hand over his own and his attentive gaze. But it isn’t. Because it isn’t fair to do this Sehun, to mentally compare him with Jongin like Tao finds himself doing, noting little things like how Sehun recommends the shrimp at the restaurant to him while Jongin knows he’s allergic, how Sehun’s hands are too big for him to cover with his own when they walk home together, how he laughs a bit too loudly, with his mouth wide open and Tao feels like such an asshole but he knows, with a growing certainty as he lets Sehun press him into a wall and leave small nipping kisses on his lips, that this can’t continue.
He finally manages to convince Sehun to go home, despite the constant flickering of the other’s eyes to the house keys Tao has clutched in his hand but there’s no way in hell Tao’s going to take Sehun home to fool around, even if the vindictive part of his mind perks up at the idea of aggravating Jongdae. He rides the elevator up silently, absent-mindedly pushing all the buttons so he can delay getting to his floor. The apartment's empty, Jongin’s shoes missing from the rack and he’s probably gone over to Chen’s again. Tao fumbles his way into his room in the dark, not bothering to change before falling into bed.
It’s still dark when he cracks his eyes open, blinking as his eyes adjust to the darkness, limbs tensing when he senses the presence of someone else beside him, mattress dipping under the added weight. He reaches over and brushes against rough fabric as the person shifts their leg till it’s pressed against his own. “Jongin?” he asks, voice hoarse and too loud in the silence of the room. There’s no reply but he feels arms coming around his waist, a solid chest pressing against his back and he sighs softly, adjusting till they’re spooning, Jongin propping his chin on his shoulder. There’s nothing but the soft sounds of each inhale and exhale and Jongin’s scent surrounding him, the sandalwood of his soap and the peppermint lotion he uses after dance practice mixing and intermingling with the heady smell that is pure Jongin and Tao wants to turn over, press his nose to Jongin’s neck and inhale, take him in until he’s dizzy. Lips brush against his jaw as Jongin murmurs. “How was your date?”
There’s so much he could say, lie and pretend it was great, break down and confess that Jongin was the only one on his mind but he settles for the simplest and most honest thing to say. “I missed you.”
Then Jongin’s sliding a leg on his other side, weight resting on his thighs and Tao stares into the shadows, trying to find his face, reaching up to trace the air until he makes contact with soft locks. Jongin sighs softly, whispered exhale ghosting over Tao’s fingers. “You smell like him.”
Tao swallows. “Then you should fix that.”
There’s the rustling of sheets again and then the weight is gone and a sliver of light breaks through as Jongin opens the door and slips outside. Tao lies there unmoving until the door shuts again with a soft click and there’s someone crawling onto the bed again but the hands that touch him this time are softer, the lips pressing petal soft kisses to the inside of his arm aren’t the full ones he’s had against his own so many times and Tao lets out a shuddery breath. There’s a weight on his other side and a different set of fingers running through his hair and Tao shuts his eyes, gives way to sensation and how his skin burns hot under their touch, hands roaming over every inch of exposed skin, tugging his shirt over his head and his pants down his thighs until he kicks them the rest of the way off. There’s lips on his chest, fingers ghosting along his thighs and Tao expects them to go for his cock, expects this to be another quick session where everyone gets off and then leaves him alone to deal with the hollow ache in his chest but it isn’t. Pressed together, skin against skin, it’s like the two of them are trying to learn him, every curve, every dip, all the textures of his skin, finding all the places that make his squirm and gasp out. He’s gently pushed to lie on his front, lips tracing their way down his back, hovering over the curve of his spine and pressing kisses to the base, the second set of hands tracing his shoulder blades. He’s hard now, almost painfully so and he whines low in his throat, rutting forward against the mattress, the friction providing some relief. Then there’s small hands gripping his hips and pulling him into a kneeling position with a surprising amount of strength. His cock hangs between his legs, fat and heavy and he whimpers, trying to reach down to stroke at himself but then there’s fingers wrapping around his wrists and tugging him forward into a lap, the grip firm but not tight enough to hurt him. The hands on his hips soothe over his back before moving away and then there’s a click of a plastic cap and a wet finger running between the cleft of his ass and Tao moans, pushing against the pressure and letting his breath escape in a soft hiss as it breaches him up to the first knuckle. It’s been months since he’s bottomed and the burn lances up his spine, mingling with the soft sparks of pleasure drawn from the hands sliding over his chest, tweaking at nipples, a strange pleasure-pain medley that has him confused but not unwilling. He breathes deep and relaxes himself through the stretch, biting into the soft thighs of the person holding his wrist and smirking against the skin at the small yelp he elicits. When he’s stuffed three fingers deep and gasping, the hands around his wrists release and callused fingertips track over his neck, cupping his chin and tugging him forward until his lips brush against hard, hot skin and he willingly opens up, takes him in as the fingers slide out of his ass and he’s left clenching around nothing. Then there’s more wetness being smeared along his crack before the person pushes in, achingly slow.
If you asked Tao to recall that night, he could only tell you bits and pieces of what actually happened, the pressure of hands propping his hips up, the slow strokes of a tongue tracing designs into his skin, hands in his hair and feeling so full and open in a way he hadn’t in a long time. He would be able to remember how it felt like they ceased being three individuals and become one entity united in touch and sensation, the room their own little world where time stopped moving and they created their own reality. Most clearly, he can remember feeling so wanted , no longer the outsider, the actor fulfilling the fetish but someone who was cared for and held so lovingly.
Waking up is always Tao’s least favorite thing to do and worse so when he wakes up in between two warm bodies, both pressing into him, warm and solid and it would be so damn easy to fall back asleep but he forces himself up, limbs feeling like dead weights as he extracts himself from their embrace, eliciting a displeased whine from one of the sleeping forms that has him pressing a hand to his chest, trying desperately to stamp out the ache. In the half light of the sun peeking out from the horizon as dawn gives way to day, he moves silently around the room, a ghost-like figure collecting articles of clothing, his laptop, phone and hesitating briefly before removing and leaving his house keys on the bedside table. There’s a soft murmuring sound from behind him but he doesn’t look back, slinging the bag over his shoulder and exiting quietly, the soft click of the door the only sound he leaves in his wake.
The streets of Seoul have that tranquil air they only retain in the early hours of the morning, before the hordes come to claim the place. There’s only the chirping of the birds overhead and the low yells of truck drivers delivering supplies to stores. He takes the early bus to Gangnam, tipping his hat to the sleepy looking driver and spends the ride staring blankly out the window. From his stop, it’s a short walk around the corner and up a few flight of stairs till he’s knocking repeatedly on a door.
Minseok is still caught halfway in the Sandman’s trap when he opens the door, eyes blinking sleepily as he tries to process the image of Tao on his doorstep in his nightclothes with a duffel over his shoulder. “Taozi?” he murmurs, tone confused but warm as he beckoned him forward, opening the door wider.
Tao takes a deep breath as he steps in, letting the bag fall to the floor. “Hi, hyung.” There’s more things he means to say, explanations, apologies but it’s hard to get words out when you’re choking on sobs.
***
NEXT
He’s better by Friday night, although that doesn’t stop him from taking another day off work through some strategic whining at his supervisor, Joonmyun, over the phone. He spends the day filling out a kink checklist Chen’s sent him (and where on earth did Chen find one in Mandarin?) and gets a very helpful graph in response with his and Jongin’s shared kinks highlighted in red. He wonders if the second session is too soon to burst out the restraints or if that’s more of a fourth-time-fucking you thing. Someone should publish a guide for this sort of thing.
He doesn’t get to tie Jongin down but he fucks him on his hands and knees, fingers wrapped in a tight ring around the base of his shaft, taking Jongin to the edge and backing away before he can come, reveling in the sweet sounds he can pull from the other, until Jongin’s a pleading mess. Then he fucks him open, slow and precise until Jongin’s coming with a hoarse cry and Tao, remembering the watchful eye of Chen across the room pulls out and jerks himself off, knees on either side of Jongin’s head until he’s coming, painting white all along Jongin’s face, some of it getting in his hair. He’s expecting his dismissal this time around and leaves, feeling the familiar mixture of satisfaction and disappointment.
The third time is the next week, the fourth sooner than that and before Tao realises, the sessions have become a routine occurrence and he’s long gotten over the awkwardness of having Chen in the same room. At this point he practically revels in it. They’ve booked the hotel so many times now that the disembodied voice behind the frosted glass gives him a wave through the gap as he passes by and he’s pretty sure he could trace the path to their room in his sleep. He’s become intimately acquainted with all the contours of Jongin’s body, knows which spots make him gasp out and which ones he tries to hide . He also finally knows what Chen looks like when he comes, head thrown back and a delicious, bitten-off noise coming from his throat as the light illuminates his skin and Tao is irritated that he manages to look good even like this.
He’s heading over to Minseok’s, takeout bag of food swinging at his side, an apology gift for how often he’s brushed off the other man’s invitations to hang out all month. He’s humming to himself as he winds his way through the streets, hair mussed and clothes still rumpled from earlier. Jongin had met him at the hotel and said they’d be going on a small field trip. A field trip which consisted of him and Jongin fucking on Chen’s desk at his office, nearly giving the other man a heart attack when he’d walked in and upending a neatly stacked pile of essays. If the way Chen’s hand had immediately gone to his belt as he sat in his desk chair was any indication, he didn’t really mind the excuse to not finish any marking. He’d lazily tugged his clothes on afterwards, watching out of the corner of his eye as Chen pinned Jongin to the desk, tipping his head to the side so he could suck over a bruise Tao had left their minutes earlier and it almost had Tao roaring to go again. It was a new development in their arrangement that Chen no longer made Tao leave right after, letting him stay and watch but never long enough to see Jongin get fucked and it always left Tao with this burning curiosity. He’d seen the bruises around Jongin’s wrists and the way he limped afterwards, or the weekends where he wouldn’t come stumbling back into their apartment til the wee hours of the morning. It was one way he was reminded that he was nothing more than a guest in their world, lines that blurred close sometimes when Jongin leaned against him while he cooked breakfast or held his hand on the subway. More and more he feels like he needs that reality check.
He takes the elevator up to Minseok’s apartment, checking his phone as he waits. He has a new text from Jongin, a picture of Jjangah with her head stuck in a plastic container and he smiles fondly, the ding from the elevator pulling him out of his thoughts. He makes his way down the hall to the apartment, frowning when he sees the door is unlocked and he pushes it open, shouting out a greeting.
And then promptly slams it shut again because Luhan, Minseok, hands on unmentionables and good god Tao really needs to learn how to knock.
He has a feeling Minseok is mad at him when he’s left to stand there for the next ten minutes until the door opens and Luhan comes stumbling out, shirt half-off and a dopey grin on his face. He ruffles his hair as he passes by and Tao half expects him to burst into song, Disney movie style ( Today My Prince Made Me Come maybe.) Minseok appears at the door, shirtless and with a pocky stick held between his lips. “Hello stranger.”
Tao ducks his head, feeling like he’s being silently reprimanded. “Hi, hyung,” he says sheepishly, scratching at his head with his free hand. “Can I come in?"
Minseok shrugs. “Do what you want.” He walks inside and Tao follows, placing the takeout bag on the counter. “You’re mad at me, aren’t you?”
“Well, you’ve done nothing but avoid me all month so yes, I’m not too enamoured with you right now.” Minseok takes another pocky stick out, clamping it between his teeth. He catches Tao’s gaze and shrugs. ‘Trying to give up smoking.”
“I’m glad.” Tao brings over a plate, making sure to stack the biggest pieces of galbi on Minseok’s plate. All this barbecue is going to put a major dent in his spending money but it’s worth it if it gets Minseok to like him again. Minseok grudgingly reach out for the proffered food, frowning when Tao pulls away at the last second. “Say you forgive me first.”
“You brat.” Minseok makes another grab for the food and Tao holds it high over his head. Minseok hmphs and turns over to lie on his side, back facing him. “I don’t want it anymore, go away.”
“Come on, hyung.” Tao whines putting the food down and pressing alongside Minseok till they’re spooning with Minseok’s face smushed against the back of the couch. “I wasn’t avoiding you on purpose, I swear. I had a lot of work, I’ve barely had any time to myself all month. I had to skip my haircut, for chrissake.” Tao tugs one of Minseok’s arms free and brings it to his head. “See? Split ends everywhere.”
He feels the vibrations of Minseok’s laugh as he tries to stifle it against the cushion and he smiles, knowing he’s won this round. Minseok rolls over until they’re nose to nose, reaching over to smooth his fingers through Tao’s hair. “You’re incorrigible.”
“You love me anyways.” Tao preens and Minseok sighs, sitting up and reaching for the food. “God knows why.” He stuff a piece of beef in his mouth, fingers sticky with sauce before reaching over to feed him one. “So, tell me about work, and why it’s keeping you busy.”
They talk and eat and Tao realises how much he’s missed being in the company of someone without the constant snark (Chen) or butterflies in his stomach (Jongin). Minseok is the right amount of teasing and attentive and it leaves Tao feeling more at ease than he has all month and in a rare moment of weakness, as he’s staring at the top of Minseok’s head from where it’s leaning against his chest, he wishes he could do this with Jongin. He banishes that thought as fast as it appears.
Minseok stretches, hand coming to rest on Tao’s stomach, fingers skimming absently along his skin and Tao tenses unconsciously. Normally, this would be the prelude to sex for them and he isn’t technically in any kind of exclusive relationship with Chen and Jongin, but it still feels wrong and he pulls away. Minseok says nothing but withdraws his hand, bringing it up to rest on Tao’s shoulder instead and they don’t mention it. Tao leaves once the show is over, he has reports to write and legal concepts to brush up on and Minseok doesn’t protest, merely pulling him into a bear hug and threatening to burn his eyebrows off if he ignores him for so long again.
Chen is home when he gets there, the stack of marking from earlier set out in front of him at the dining table as he flips through papers. Tao hesitates before bringing his own files over, sliding across from him quietly. Chen doesn’t give any indication that he’s noticed but he draws his legs back so Tao can fit his under the table. They work quietly, room punctuated with the quiet sound of pen over paper and the stapler clicking together .Chen speaks first, sighing lowly as he pushes his chair back slightly. “Why the hell did I go into teaching again?”
Tao smiles to himself. He’d sooner eat a pound of lemons than admit it but Chen sounds cuter when he’s being whiny. “To spread the joy of learning and Chinese culture of course.” He laughs when he hears Chen snorts, shoving his seat back and pushing his files away. “And because it beats interning.”
“I’ll say.” Chen runs his finger along the spines of the files. “I’m surprised you don’t have carpal tunnel yet from all the stapling.”
“Give me two more months and I’ll be jerking off left-handed.” Tao stands. “Do you want a drink?” Chen nods and Tao brings two water bottles over and one of his precious boxes of almond biscuits. Chen mocks gasps when he sees it, already reaching over to rip off the cellophane. “You sharing snacks? Is there a blue moon forecasted for tonight?”
“Shut up and take some before I change my mind.”
They eat in silence before Chen speaks next. “So what’d you do after you left the hotel?”
“Went to visit Minseok hyung.” Tao mumbles, cheeks stuffed with almond cookies . He pauses mid-chew when he sees Chen’s eyes go hard and swallows slowly.
Chen is good at guarding his emotions but by now Tao can tell that whenever he gets that blank expression, it means he’s mad and he doesn’t know why that makes him feel nervous. Chen’s voice is cold when he speaks. “Did you two fuck?”
Tao shakes his head vehemently. “No! I mean- when I came he was with someone else doing- ” he makes a vague hand gesture, “and later- I didn’t want to because I’ve only been with Jong- you two for a while and I didn’t want to risk anything...Minseok and I use condoms but I still didn’t.”
He can tell he’s said the right thing, no matter how poorly articulated because Chen’s eyes soften and the corner of his lips quirk up a little bit. Tao releases the tension he didn’t realize he’d gotten in his shoulders, popping another cookie in his mouth and getting started on the next round of filing. Chen resumes his marking, stretching his leg out until it brushes up against Tao’s, shifting so they’re intertwined. Neither of them speak again for the next little while but the atmosphere is comfortable and Tao is content.
***
“Tao! They’re calling us into the conference room.” Sehun runs his fingers through his hair, trying to flatten down a stubborn cowlick. Tao curses, reaching for the suit jacket he’d tossed aside earlier and shrugging it on. He nudges Sehun with his hip. “Budge over, I need to see myself.” He does a quick hair and teeth check before following Sehun to the conference room. The other three interns are already waiting and they take their place at the end of the line. Sulli, the pretty intern with the long brown hair and passion for Tort gives him nervous smile that he returns before the door opens and they all stiffen. Joonmyun walks in front of them and they all bow in sync. Joonmyun smiles at them. “Hello everyone. I’m going to spare you all the anxiety and tell you that this meeting has been called to announce the results of your evaluations. All you have worked incredibly hard these past few months and should take pride in the growth you’ve shown. I’ve discussed with your supervisors and co-workers and we’ll be taking three of you on as paralegals.” He looks down at the sheet in his hands. “Firstly, there is Miss Choi. Congratulations.”
Tao claps along with the others, mouth dry as Sulli beams beside him. The next person announced is Sehun and he lets out a little whoop before clapping his hand over his mouth. Finally Joonmyun pauses, and Tao wants to punch him, who does he think he is with these dramatic pauses, Alex Trebek? He’s caught off guard when everyone starts clapping again and the others are looking over at him. He catches Sehun’s eye and the other gives him a thumb up, eye twinkling and oh shit, Tao got the position.
He saves his jubilation til they're out of the office, stopping to bow to every senior giving big bear hugs to Niel and Wooyoung, the other two interns. He and Sehun walk arm in arm out of the office, singing at the top of their lungs, ties tugged loose and faces red. Sehun loops an arm around his waist as they stand on the subway platform. “We should go out this weekend and celebrate. I bet we could sucker Baekhyun hyung into buying drinks.”
“Sounds good, text me the details.” Tao gives him a tight squeeze as his train pulls into the station. He spends the entire ride back high on happiness, to the point where even the umbrella poking his thigh can’t put a damper on his joy. He’s hyped, full of energy like he hasn't been in a long while, bounding up the stairs to the apartment in lieu of the elevators. Jongin looks surprised when he sees Tao in the front door, sweating and with a huge smile over his face. He squeals when Tao picks him up and spin him around in a circle giddily, collapsing on the couch with Jongin atop him. The other boy laughs. “What was all that about?”
“You know the evaluations I told you about? When they’d decide who gets hired at the firm?” Jongin nods affirmatively before his eyes widen and then he’s yelling too, pulling Tao into a hug and it’s soft and lovely and Tao’s just so goddamned happy right now.
Jongin pulls away, hands still cupping his face. “We need to celebrate,” he insists, getting off Tao’s lap.” Go change, I’ll treat you to lunch.”
“You don’t have to.” he insists but Jongin merely pushes him towards the bathroom and Tao acquiesces. They walk to a nearby samgyupsal restaurant and the owner greets Jongin warmly before ushering them to a low table. They grill the meat, Jongin repeatedly slapping Tao’s hand away as he tries to take a few off early. Once the meat’s prepared, Jongin makes him a lettuce wrap, reaching over to feed it to him. Tao feels his heart pick up at the soft brush of Jongin’s fingertips against his lower lip and he wants to keep his hand there when the other pulls away. There’s a large bruise on the inside of Jongin’s arm and Tao winces, reaching over to trace it. ”That looks bad, what happened?”
“This? I was helping one of the kids at the studio with her pirouettes and she knocked me into the barre.” Jongin shrugs. “Occupational hazard.”
“You know, I’ve never seen you at the studio.” Tao muses, dipping his meat in the sesame paste. “You’ve been to my firm, we’ve seen Chen’s office-” he pointedly ignores Jongin’s smirk. ”But I’ve never seen you in your element.”
Jongin hums, tipping his head to the side. “The studios on the way home, maybe we can drop by and I can show you.”
They take a detour after leaving the restaurant, Jongin leading Tao down several side-alleys and through a park before they reach a small studio tucked away in the corner of a narrow street. The inside smells like wood polish and sweat and takes him back to childhood training sessions at the temple. Jongin waves to the receptionist at the counter and leads Tao past several rooms where classes are being taught, from toddlers bobbing along with their parents to the beat to elderly women doing zumba training that makes him feel tired just from watching. There’s a small room at the end of the hall which smells like mildew and musty air when Jongin flicks on the light, the fluorescent light bulb flickering and the paint peeling off the walls. Jongin gives Tao a sheepish smile. “This is my room for now, its not much. I want to renovate but there’s no money right now.”
“I like it.” And Tao does, as he looks around, noting that although the floor is cracked and lacks the polished finish of those in the other rooms, it’s clean and so is the mirror and the barre, evidence of a loving devotion to the space by its owner. Here and there a few framed prints of ballerinas hang and Tao steps closer to the one nearest him. It’s a ballerina poised on one leg, face placid and muscles tensed in a way that leave Tao in awe at the sheer mastery and strength. Jongin comes up behind him, propping his chin on his shoulder and Tao hunches down, to make it easier. “That’s Misty Copeland.” Jongin says voice dreamy. “She’s a ballet prodigy and one of my idols.”
“You sound like you’re talking about a crush.” Tao laughs and Jongin blows in his ear in retaliation. “Shut up, it’s not like that. I just really admire her as a dancer.”
“Speaking of, I thought you brought me here to show me your moves.” Jongin grins and pushes Tao up against the wall. “Man the stereo.”
Jongin selects a song and Tao presses play into once he’s taken his position in the center of the room. Jongin waits a few beats before he begins to move and Tao is entranced. It’s like sweet, childish Jongin with his playful nature and quirks transforms into this sensual, powerful being who moves across the floor, movements fluid and controlled as he turns and extends, an enrapturing display of rhythm and movement. It’s a peek into a different side of Jongin, one Tao had never seen till now and he feels honoured to get to see this. He applauds as the music fades and Jongin is panting, bent in half as he tries to catch his breath and he laughs, ducking his head bashfully as Tao slings an arm around him. “That was amazing!”
“I didn’t have my shoes and I was just freestyling-”Jongin tries to protest but Tao shushes him loudly, drowning out his protests until a laughing Jongin drags him out of the room, flicking the lights off as they go. Tao continues to gush over him, drawing the amused stares of passers-by. “Seriously Jongin, what on earth are you doing teaching, you should be on stage as a pita ballerina or whatever it’s called.”
Jongin bursts out laughing, stopping them in the middle of the sidewalk as he covers his mouth with one palm. “ Prima ballerina you dummy and that term isn’t used for male soloists.” They continue down the sidewalk, Jongin elongating his steps to avoid touching the cracks and Tao stifles a smile. “I almost was actually, I trained with the Korea National Ballet for six years.” He spots an ice cream van and takes Tao’s hand dragging him in its direction. “C’mon, I’ll treat you.”
“So, wait,” Tao continues once they’re seated on a bench and biting into vanilla cones. “You were basically the next great Primark ballerina. Why did you quit?”
“Prima.“Jongin emphasizes before shrugging. “Well, ballet was my dream since I was a kid and I started tagging along with my sisters to classes before formally attending. I got selected to go train when I was teenager and from that age on I worked with some of the best choreographers and teachers in the business, getting good roles in the annual shows... They were grooming me as their next great male soloist and I don’t know… at some point it go to me .I was working 20 hour days rehearsing and training, they had me on diets, couldn’t see my family and it was hard to make friends when you know everyone’s secretly wishing for you to break your ankle during a lift so they can have a chance at your spot.” He smiles softly. “I dropped out after a breakdown that led to two weeks of hospitalization.” He snorts softly. “Ironically enough, that’s how I met Chen.”
Well, this is intriguing. Chen and Jongin have never divulged details of their relationship back story to Tao, giving purposefully vague answers or brushing him off entirely. He nods, encouraging Jongin to elaborate.
Jongin stretches his arms over his head, arching his neck to one side. “It was around Christmas season. I was the male lead selected for The Nutcracker, it was my first major soloist role. Too much pressure, too little rest, I ended up collapsing in rehearsal and was hospitalized for exhaustion. Chen’s boyfriend at the time was in the bed beside me. We used to talk a lot since his boyfriend was drugged up most of the time and after his boyfriend got out, Chen kept coming to talk to me and it kind of just continued from there. He was the one who helped me realize that I was miserable in the professional ballet world and he let me bum off him for a few months when I dropped out and was trying to get teaching qualifications. We ended up dating and the rest is history.” Jongin pops the last piece of the cone in his mouth, eyes scrunching as chews. “It’s not glamorous or anything but I really enjoy teaching. People from the company still mock me, you know? Talk about me being weak and how if I’d wanted to be a teacher, I could’ve done that at the end of my professional career, become a professor with the National Ballet. But I really don’t care. Most of my kids are never going to be prima ballerinas, they don’t have the right look or height or skill and I know it. But Misty Copeland-she started training at thirteen and no one thought she’d make it but look at her now. Maybe I will train a star amongst my kids or maybe I’ll just instill a love of dance in them. Either way, I’m satisfied with what I have.”
Tao is speechless as he stares at Jongin’s profile. It’s easy to forget that Jongin isn’t some naive, happy-go-lucky child coasting through life through his smile and likeable personality, there’s a strength and maturity to his character that Tao maybe doesn’t appreciate enough.
“So,” Jongin says when they’re making their way across the park, arms brushing as they walk. “I’ve shown you my skills, when am I going to get to see yours?”
“What talents? I can recite all the articles of the Sale of Goods Act but I doubt that’ll interest you.”
“Not that.” Jongin mimes flipping something, ending with an exaggerated karate yell. “Wushu!”
Tao narrows his eyes at him. “How did you find out?”
Jongin chuckles, nervously scratching at his scalp. “I was putting your laundry away for you- organized your sock drawer by the way- and I found one of your medals in the drawer. You were good.”
Tao shrugs. “I did it for almost thirteen years, my dad got me into it. I wanted to go professional but after my dad passed away, I thought it was best for my mom if I went to law school.”
“And why Korea? Why not do law in China?” Jongin takes his hand and tugs him around a group of schoolgirls. He leaves them intertwined and Tao savours the warmth of the small palm against his own.
“I guess- I just wanted to run away for a while. I was in a bad place after my dad died and I needed to escape. Korea was the closest and when I got the scholarship, I jumped at it.”
Jongin hmms. "Well, the circumstances might not have been the best but I’m glad you came here.” He gives his hand a small squeeze and Tao grins, squeezing back. They’re at their apartment building and the landlord waves to them as they walk by.
“So, since you’re like this wushu grandmaster,” Jongin says in the elevator, head resting on Tao’s shoulder. “Can you do, like, flips and shit?"
Tao laughs. “I can use nunchucks too.”
“Holy shit.” Jongin’s eyes are wide as he stares up at him, the ding of the elevator echoing as they reach their floor. “Can you show me?”
“Tag along with me the next time I go to the gym.” They reach the door and Tao starts fishing for his keys. He’s just fitted them in when the door opens and he’s staring down at Chen’s smug face, powdered sugar smeared across his lips and down his front as he chews a doughnut. “Honey, you’re home.” he croons and Tao hmphs, pushing past him, Jongin on his heels. He hears giggling from behind him and a high-pitched squeak and when he faces them again after toeing his shoes off, Jongin now has a smear of powdered white across his top lip.
“How on earth did you even get in while we were both gone?” he grumbles, folding his arms. Chen shrugs. “Jongin made me a key.”
Jongin withers under Tao’s disapproving gaze. “I thought’d be okay. I should've asked, sorry.”
“I don’t know why you’re so grouchy, Zitao,” Chen licks powdered sugar off his fingers. ” It’s not like we don’t already know each other intimately .”
That does it. Tao turns to give Jongin a big smile as he moves closer to Chen. “Hey, remember when I told you I could do flips?” Jongin furrows his eyebrows in confusion. "Yeah?”
“I can also flip other people. Here let me demonstrate.” Chen lets out a yell as Tao suddenly grabs his waist and tosses him over one shoulder . It’s a modified version of the one he’d use in combat but he’ll make some allowances for tiny, irritants. It’s still gratifying to see Chen squirm and curse, kicking out until Tao drops him to the floor. He glares up at him from where he’s collapsed, legs akimbo, letting out a string of curses in Mandarin insulting Tao’s mother, appearance and implying that he was born outside of holy matrimony. Tao blows him a two-fingered kiss then skitters away to his room before Chen can get back up and track him down.
***
The air is thick with cigarette smoke and sweat and the bar counter feels sticky under his cheek as he rests against the cool surface. The bartender frowns, reaching over to lift his head up and slide a napkin underneath. “I think you’re done for the night, didi”
"But Yijing ge ” Tao slurs, lifting his head up to stare at the other man imploringly. “I’m fiiiine.”
The cute bartender with the Changsha accent who Tao had befriended two hours ago after the other had saved him from slamming face first into a table flicks a towel at his head. “It’s Yixing and no you’re not fine. Where are the friends you came with?”
“My co-workers?” Tao looks around the bar. Sulli is in the corner, top three buttons of her blouse undone and chatting with an older-looking guy with a moustache as a jealous Niel looks on. Sehun is playing pool in the corner with a few other people, sleeves rolled up as he lines up his cue and Tao swallows, turning away. “I think I’ll head out now.” He tries to stand and groans when he floor starts spinning. Yixing grabs his arm, steadying him. "Wait, I’ll call you a cab. Don’t you dare try walking home in this state.”
Tao nods in agreement, collecting his jacket and depositing a few bills in Yixing’s tip jar. He tenses when he feels someone slide beside him and twists to see Sehun at his side. “Hey.”
“Hi.” Tao fidgets, one eye on the entrance, waiting for an orange car to pull up so he can make his escape. Sehun frowns, looking down at his jacket. “You’re leaving already?”
“Yeah, I have to get up early tomorrow and… skype with my great aunt.” Tao chuckles nervously, trying not to wilt under Sehun frown. “But it was fun, thanks for inviting me! There’s my taxi, gotta go.”
“Tao.” Sehun catches his arm before he can leave, and Tao groans internally. Sehun looks concerned, mouth turned down at the corners. “Is this about earlier?”
Ah, yes.Earlier. Earlier when they’d been alone in a booth, both four shots in and Sehun had leaned in and kissed him and a giggly, inebriated Tao had climbed into his lap and they’d made out until Sehun’s hands strayed to the hem of his t-shirt and Tao had jerked away in alarm, apologizing profusely as he’d stumbled away.
“No, that was nothing, both of us were- are- drunk.” Tao laughs airily, trying to extricate his arm. “I probably won’t even remember it by tomorrow.”
Sehun opens his mouth to speak again right as the taxi driver honks loudly and Tao yanks himself free and all but runs to the exit, sliding into the backseat of the cab and quickly rattling off his address to the driver. He rolls the window down, letting the cool air clear some of the fog surrounding his mind and he feels a bit less like he’s going to puke out all his internal organs by the time they pull up to the apartment.
He’d left in a hurry earlier, eager to get out of the apartment and escape Jongin and Chen’s insufferable loving-couple antics, Jongin draping himself over his boyfriend's back, connected by shared headphones as the latter scrolled through buzzfeed articles on his laptop, both of them laughing and teasing and the entire scene had been entirely too domestic and comfortable so Tao had chosen to leave early rather than skulk around his own damn home feeling like a third wheel.
He cautiously opens the door, straining to hear any sounds that might indicate copulation (See? He’s learning.) There’s only the muted din of the tv and he steps inside, kicking his shoes off as he goes to the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of water which he takes to the living room. Jongin and Chen are on the couch, Jongin resting his cheek in his palm as he glares at an oblivious Chen who’s absorbed in his phone. Jongin pats the seat beside him and Tao only hesitates briefly before heading over. The other sighs and leans against his arm. “How was your night?” he sniffs Tao, wrinkling his nose. “Are you using a new cologne or something?’
Sehun. Tao swallows and shakes his head. "No, it must be my co-worker’s, he was spraying it all over the place. My night was good. Boozy mostly. What about you two?”
“Well,” Jongin’s tone is ice, expression sour. “We were supposed to have a nice night in and watch a movie but somebody missed that memo.”
“For fucks sake, would you cut it out with the passive-aggressive bullshit?” Chen’s voice is sharp and Tao sees Jongin flinch, his back still facing his boyfriend. “I told you, there’s been an issue with the mid-term results and Yifan needs my help.”
“Yifan always fucking needs your help, this happens every fucking time we try to do something together," Jongin snaps back and Chen just sighs and shakes his head, going back to his phone. The tension in the air is palpable and Tao wants nothing more than to slink away but Jongin fixes him with a Look, implying a world of pain for him if he dares move and it’s honestly quite terrifying. So there he is, half-focusing on the movie and half waiting for another outburst. He’s almost dozed off entirely, when he feels a soft pressure on his knee. Jongin is staring straight ahead, eyes affixed on the screen as he mindlessly rubs circles into Tao’s thighs and he relaxes, eyes drooping shut once again.
They shoot open again when he feels Jongin deliberately palm him through his jeans and he buck his hips, trying to shift away but Jongin just brings up a leg, resting his thigh on top of Tao’s and keeping him pinned as his ministrations get stronger, Tao’s cock responding to the pressure and the friction and he bites his lip, trying to muffle the small groan working it’s way up his throat. He’s not sure what exactly Jongin is up to and this is far beyond the realm of their normal sexual setup but Tao’s not complaining. He leans back against the couch and sighs softly, letting the sensations take over.
He lets out an embarrassing moan that he quickly tries to pass off as a cough. Chen looks up from his phone, giving him a strange look before returning to his work and Jongin gives Tao a small smirk as he tugs Tao’s zipper down the rest of the way, pulling his cock out through the slit in his boxers, bringing his hand to his mouth and his palm is slick when he replaces it. He begins to stroke, slow teasing movements, thumb coming up to press into the slit and smear precome over the head, making everything wetter and messier, the squelch of wet skin against skin barely drowned out by the sounds from the tv and Tao tenses, terrified that any moment Chen will turn his head and see but at the same time wanting him too. There’s something deliciously illicit about this and it just serves to make him harder, make his hips stutter as he tries to thrust up into Jongin’s grip, muffling his moans all the while.
Jongin is still looking away, eyes flitting from the tv to Chen and his boyfriend’s obliviousness seems to displease him because the next thing Tao feels is Jongin’s elbow digging into his thigh as he bends over and a warm wet heat envelops him. He can’t control his sounds this time, a long low moan echoing around the room as Jongin takes him lower, tongue flicking against the ridge, tracing patterns along the underside and Tao almost loses it, right there and then when Jongin tilts his head to look at him, eyes bright and lips stretched, pink and pretty around his girth and it’s fucking obscene .
He’s almost forgotten the presence of a third party on the couch when suddenly the heat around his cock is gone and he whines in tandem with Jongin. The dancer’s back is arched, head wrenched back as Chen tugs him down, hand fisted in his hair, the other holding his arms. He lets out a low laugh, lips skirting the shell of Jongin’s ear and Tao can see it, the shift from Jongin the minx to the soft, pliant sub under Chen’s touch. “Really, Jonginnie?” Chen’s tone is amused as he tips Jongin’s head back further. “You were that desperate for my attention?” He suddenly pushes Jongin down roughly, till his face is hovering over Tao’s cock, breaths ghosting over the head and making it twitch and spit out precome. “Or are you just that needy for cock, my pretty little slut?”
Jongin gasps and tries to arch up. “Dae, please.” he begs.
“No.” Chen holds him there. “Haven’t I taught you better than this, hmm? You’re not going to leave Zitao all worked up are you?” He runs his hand along Jongin’s back. “You that thirsty for come? Want it that fucking bad? Then finish what you started.” His hand slides to the front, giving Jongin’s crotch a small rub. “If you do well, maybe you’ll get rewarded.”
And then Jongin’s mouth is back on his cock and he’s sucking with enough force to make Tao cry out, mind going blank as he’s overcome by sensation, the burning thrum in his veins building in intensity and he’s gasping out, every inch of his self-control being used to keep himself still as Jongin takes him lower. He starts when he feels Chen shift closer till their sides are pressed together, the other leaning his head down on Tao’s shoulder and this is unnerving, he and Chen don’t touch during sessions, it’s their unspoken rule and yet here he is, lips curled up as he watches his boyfriend deepthroat Tao. “Feels good, doesn't it?” Chen traces his finger along Jongin’s lips, where they’re wrapped around his cock and Tao whimpers, whether from the close proximity or Jongin bringing a hand up to fondle his balls, he doesn’t know. “Got such perfect little cocksucker lips. And the best part.” He pushes Jongin’s head down until Tao’s whole cock is buried down his throat, the fluttering muscles making him cry out and thrust up as Jongin chokes, eyes watering as Chen holds his head down for a few seconds before letting Jongin pull off and cough, wet gasps as a few tears run down his face. “Barely any gag reflex.”
Between Jongin’s mouth and Chen’s filthy words, Tao can’t hold back much longer and he gasps out. “I’m going to- Jongin move.” But the other takes him in further, hand wrapping around what he can't fit and all it takes is one hard suck, one flick of tongue and Tao is coming for what feels like minutes, pouring his release into the welcoming chalice of Jongin’s mouth until he’s lightheaded, body feeling weightless. Jongin pulls off, pressing a kiss to the head and Chen chuckles, fingers taking hold of Jongin’s chin, tipping his head up. “Let’s see it.”
Jongin opens his mouth, revealing the liquid still within and Tao moans, the sight almost enough to stir him again. Chen traces his thumb along Jongin’s jaw, wiping up a few traces of come that have dribbled out, bringing it up to suck into his mouth. He smiles. “Tastes good. Drink up, baby.” And Jongin swallows obediently, eyes bright and shiny, tears still clinging to the edge of his lashes and god, he looks so fucking wrecked and beautiful like this.
“Sit on his lap. Clothes off,” Chen orders and Jongin gets to his feet on unsteady legs, hands trembling as he fumbles with the belt buckle so Tao reaches over and undoes it for him, earning a small smile. They strip him out of his jeans and underwear and then Jongin’s crawling onto his lap, knees bracketing Tao’s hips as he peels his shirt off and shivers slightly in the cool air of the room, goosebumps breaking out along his arms. Tao rubs at the skin gently, leaning forward to press soft kisses into the sharp jut of his collarbones. There’s the sound of a cap opening and then Chen is there, pressing himself along Jongin’s back as his fingers disappear between his legs and Jongin shudders spreading them wider and leaning forward till his head is pressed against Tao’s chest, stifling small moans against the fabric of his shirt.
Chen is quick and efficient with his preparation, sliding two lube slick fingers in without preamble and scissoring, faster than Tao probably would’ve done but Jongin seems to revel in the roughness, fucking his hips back in smooth waves, breathing laboured. Chen catches Tao’s eye and tilts his head towards the panting boy in his lap. “Play with him.”
So he drags his fingers along Jongin’s sides, scratching lightly down his back and earning an approving hum from Chen that makes him flush with warmth. He finds a nipple and rolls it between his fingers, slow scrapes of his nail around the areola, admiring the flush painting Jongin’s chest. Red always looks so good on him. Adding a third finger, Chen looks up at Tao. “How thick are these walls?”
“Not very.”
Chen hums thoughtfully, crooking his fingers up in a way that must be perfect for Jongin as the latter starts riding back hard, mouth dropped open and hands trembling. “Give him your fingers. Keep him quiet unless you want your neighbours to get an earful.” He presses a kiss to Jongins shoulder, tone mocking. “Although this one would probably love that.”
Tao presses three of his fingers to soft, plush lips which part and take him in and not a moment too soon as Jongin begins to let out high pitched keens, drooling over the digits in his mouth as he tries to keep quiet, face streaked with saliva, tears and traces of Tao’s come and he looks so breathtaking like this. Tao soothes him, whispers sweet nothings in his ear as Chen pulls his fingers out and goes to unzip his pants. And Tao can’t deny he’s anticipating this, has wanted for so long to see what Chen and Jongin do together, has already seen Chen reduce Jongin to this glazed-eye mess with just his fingers and his words, can’t begin to imagine what he could do with his cock.
He slides in easily, eliciting a small mewl and barely gives Jongin any time to adjust before he begins fucking into him hard, the loud, filthy slap of skin against skin echoing around the room and Jongin’s keens adding to the soundtrack, the force of the thrusts sending him further into Tao’s lap as he pants against his neck. There’s care in the way Chen treats him though, the soft slide of his hand up his back, the other never taking his eyes off Jongin and it’s lewd and lustful but so loving at the same time, the way Jongin closes his eyes and arches into Chen’s touch, the movement of their bodies, an ease that comes with familiarity and trust and it leaves Tao feeling lost, left out even as he kisses Jongin because he’s an outsider to this, he will always be an outsider to this and no matter how much he tries to delude himself, this is his reality. But he just screws his eyes shut, feels the slick press of Jongin’s tongue against his and lets himself indulge in denial a bit longer because if there’s one thing Tao’s always run away from, it’s the truth.
Chen comes not long after, a melodious lilt to his moan as he grinds out his release, hand coming to take Jongin’s cock in his hand and stroke him. He sees Tao’s cock, hard once again from the display he’s witnessed and laughs, reaching over to wrap his fingers around them both, jerking them to a slow, burning orgasm that leave Tao feeling weak and a little bit empty. They stay like that, the three of them on the couch, an exhausted Jongin pressed between them before Chen pulls away, tucking himself back into his pants and helping Jongin off Tao, the two of them maneuvering him into a lying position on the couch. Chen kisses him soft and slow, hand cupping his jaw, a marked contrast to earlier and he murmurs softly to a sleepy Jongin, running fingers through his hair. “You were so good baby, so perfect.” Jongin smiles, happy and sated and Tao wants to leave, feels like he’s intruding on a private moment . Then Chen’s looking at him, an expression devoid of his usual teasing and he reaches over and ruffles Tao’s hair. “You were good, too.” His face is close and Tao suddenly wants him to pull them together, wants to be kissed the same way Jongin had. It’s an unnerving thought and he stands too quickly, clearing his throat loudly and it echoes in the silent space. “I’m going to go clean up.” he gestures to the front of his stained shirt. “Do you need anything?”
Chen shakes his head slowly, a small smile on his face as he looks down at Jongin who’s asleep, hand intertwined in his. “We’re good.”
It’s a completely innocuous statement, but it feels like rejection.
***
He’s spending his first day as a paralegal hiding in the staff bathrooms to avoid a certain blond co-worker. A part of him knows he’s being ridiculous, it’s just Sehun for chrissakes but Tao’s feeling emotionally wrung out and just wants one peaceful day, is that too much to ask? He groans as he checks the time, five minutes till he has to report to Joonmyun and be assigned his cubicle. He exits the stall and peeks carefully outside the door before leaving the bathroom. The floor is still mostly empty and he manages to make his way to Joonmyun’’s office with relative ease.
“Ah, Tao, good you’re here.” Joonmyun looks up from his desk and the figure in front of him twists to look and god fucking dammnit .
“Reporting for duty, sir.” Tao chuckles weakly, trying to avoid Sehun’s eyes as he gingerly stands near the desk, feeling Sehun’s gaze on him. Joonmyun is oblivious to the tension, sliding a piece of paper across to him. “Okay, your cubicles will be in the northwest corner on the second floor. Not much of a view but you get prime access to the coffee machine.” he gives them both a cheery smile. “You two will be neighbours!”
Tao is going to puke but he manages to paste a smile on and bow as he and Sehun leave the office and head to the elevators. Sehun turns to him as soon as the doors close and Tao curses internally, willing the damn thing to move faster. It ends up stalling with a loud screech because the universe likes to pull this kind of shit with him.
“We should call the lobby.” he mumbles, reaching for the elevator phone but Sehun steps in front of him, blocking his way. “Sehun…”
“I’m sorry.” Sehun blurts out and Tao stops trying to reach around him. Sehun looks like a kicked puppy, eyes downcast and hands fisted at his side and Tao feels a slight pang of guilt. “I shouldn’t have kissed you on Saturday. You were drunk and I took advantage of you.”
“What? No Sehun, it wasn’t like that- I just…” Tao trails off, trying to find the right words. "I was just lonely, I guess and you- well you’re good looking and I don’t find you repulsive so it seemed like a good idea.”
Flushing, Sehun peeks up, meeting his eyes. “You think I’m good looking?”
“You’re okay. When you’re not doing your waffle iron face anyways.” Tao teases and the tension abates, Sehun making a face at him before smiling and it really is amazing how it changes his whole demeanour, makes him look younger. The elevator starts moving again and they both lean against the rail, waiting.
“Um, but Tao.” Sehun is still fiddling with his fingers as he speaks."I really do like you and if you want to, I’d like to take you out.”
“Oh.” Tao wasn’t expecting this. “I don’t,” He thinks of Jongin and Chen and then the image of the two of them sleeping together on the couch this morning pops into his mind and fuck it “-see why not.” he finishes and Sehun stop fidgeting, face lighting up with glee and Tao can’t help but laugh. The elevator doors open and they disembark, heading to the two back-to-back cubicles by the corner of the office. Tao critically eyes the small desk and chair, already plotting decorations in his head. Sehun pokes his head over the dividing wall. “So, is this Friday okay? We can get dinner.”
“Huh? Oh, sure.” Tao returns Sehun’s smile. “Yeah, of course.”
Paralegal work, Tao discovers, isn’t all that different from intern work in the sense that it’s mostly pointless and dreary, except he’s spending more time doing said pointless work in a sitting position. By the end of the day, he has a sore tailbone and a significantly higher score on Candy Crush than any productive person should. He’s en route to the house when he gets a text. Jongin sends him a simple one line message saying “Saturday” with a winky face emoji, their usual session code. Tao’s about to respond in the affirmative, fingers moving on automatic when he pauses right before pressing “Send.” He deletes the message, sending off instead a simple “I can’t.”
The reply is swift. “How come?” There’s a sticker of a sad puppy right after and Tao groans, leaning his head against the subway pole. Damn Jongin and his adorable texting habits. He considers making up an excuse, but the selfish part of him wins out and texts back “I have a date.”
He’s greeted by a stony silence when he gets back to the apartment, Jongin not even looking up from his laptop as he drones out a greeting. All of Tao’s attempts at conversation get monosyllabic responses and he gives up when even Jjangah barks at his attempts at play. He retreats to his room instead. There’s a muted din outside that he can hear Jongin murmuring to Jjangah, the scrape of the door opening when Chen comes in, the hushed tones of their voices outside his door before the sounds of footsteps walking away. He rolls onto his side, clamping a pillow over his exposed ear and trying to tune it out.
He’s given the cold shoulder for three days, Jongin ignoring his existence or only acknowledging him with monosyllabic replies when he has to. Chen is unfortunately less silent with his disdain, comments ranging from sarcastic to borderline vicious and Tao feels exposed, like there’s talons digging into the softness of his belly and it isn’t long before there’s a shouting match in the kitchen, loud Mandarin echoing off the walls. The neighbours complain, the landlord comes upstairs and Tao has Chen kicked out, it’s not like the fucker is a legal tenant anyways. Jongin is none too pleased and only glares at him before retreating to his room.
Given the tranquility of his home environment, it’s unsurprising that Tao is a bedraggled mess the day of his date, nerves on edge and one more fuck-up away from either breaking everything in sight or crying (probably the latter). Sehun, bless his soul, is clearly a braver man than Tao’s ever given him credit for as he ignores Tao’s uncombed hair and bloodshot eyes when they meet in the lobby after work, only reaching for Tao’s arm as they go down the metro steps and Tao lets him. It feels nice to have someone to lean on as the train rockets from the station. Sehun is sweet and a gentleman and holds the door open for Tao when they get to the restaurant. He keeps up a stream of pleasant chatter throughout, and it’s easy to converse, laugh at jokes and poke at his food. Sehun looks radiant under the chandelier light and Tao can feel the envious stares of other patrons and it’s all so perfect and Tao should be content with this, with Sehun’s hand over his own and his attentive gaze. But it isn’t. Because it isn’t fair to do this Sehun, to mentally compare him with Jongin like Tao finds himself doing, noting little things like how Sehun recommends the shrimp at the restaurant to him while Jongin knows he’s allergic, how Sehun’s hands are too big for him to cover with his own when they walk home together, how he laughs a bit too loudly, with his mouth wide open and Tao feels like such an asshole but he knows, with a growing certainty as he lets Sehun press him into a wall and leave small nipping kisses on his lips, that this can’t continue.
He finally manages to convince Sehun to go home, despite the constant flickering of the other’s eyes to the house keys Tao has clutched in his hand but there’s no way in hell Tao’s going to take Sehun home to fool around, even if the vindictive part of his mind perks up at the idea of aggravating Jongdae. He rides the elevator up silently, absent-mindedly pushing all the buttons so he can delay getting to his floor. The apartment's empty, Jongin’s shoes missing from the rack and he’s probably gone over to Chen’s again. Tao fumbles his way into his room in the dark, not bothering to change before falling into bed.
It’s still dark when he cracks his eyes open, blinking as his eyes adjust to the darkness, limbs tensing when he senses the presence of someone else beside him, mattress dipping under the added weight. He reaches over and brushes against rough fabric as the person shifts their leg till it’s pressed against his own. “Jongin?” he asks, voice hoarse and too loud in the silence of the room. There’s no reply but he feels arms coming around his waist, a solid chest pressing against his back and he sighs softly, adjusting till they’re spooning, Jongin propping his chin on his shoulder. There’s nothing but the soft sounds of each inhale and exhale and Jongin’s scent surrounding him, the sandalwood of his soap and the peppermint lotion he uses after dance practice mixing and intermingling with the heady smell that is pure Jongin and Tao wants to turn over, press his nose to Jongin’s neck and inhale, take him in until he’s dizzy. Lips brush against his jaw as Jongin murmurs. “How was your date?”
There’s so much he could say, lie and pretend it was great, break down and confess that Jongin was the only one on his mind but he settles for the simplest and most honest thing to say. “I missed you.”
Then Jongin’s sliding a leg on his other side, weight resting on his thighs and Tao stares into the shadows, trying to find his face, reaching up to trace the air until he makes contact with soft locks. Jongin sighs softly, whispered exhale ghosting over Tao’s fingers. “You smell like him.”
Tao swallows. “Then you should fix that.”
There’s the rustling of sheets again and then the weight is gone and a sliver of light breaks through as Jongin opens the door and slips outside. Tao lies there unmoving until the door shuts again with a soft click and there’s someone crawling onto the bed again but the hands that touch him this time are softer, the lips pressing petal soft kisses to the inside of his arm aren’t the full ones he’s had against his own so many times and Tao lets out a shuddery breath. There’s a weight on his other side and a different set of fingers running through his hair and Tao shuts his eyes, gives way to sensation and how his skin burns hot under their touch, hands roaming over every inch of exposed skin, tugging his shirt over his head and his pants down his thighs until he kicks them the rest of the way off. There’s lips on his chest, fingers ghosting along his thighs and Tao expects them to go for his cock, expects this to be another quick session where everyone gets off and then leaves him alone to deal with the hollow ache in his chest but it isn’t. Pressed together, skin against skin, it’s like the two of them are trying to learn him, every curve, every dip, all the textures of his skin, finding all the places that make his squirm and gasp out. He’s gently pushed to lie on his front, lips tracing their way down his back, hovering over the curve of his spine and pressing kisses to the base, the second set of hands tracing his shoulder blades. He’s hard now, almost painfully so and he whines low in his throat, rutting forward against the mattress, the friction providing some relief. Then there’s small hands gripping his hips and pulling him into a kneeling position with a surprising amount of strength. His cock hangs between his legs, fat and heavy and he whimpers, trying to reach down to stroke at himself but then there’s fingers wrapping around his wrists and tugging him forward into a lap, the grip firm but not tight enough to hurt him. The hands on his hips soothe over his back before moving away and then there’s a click of a plastic cap and a wet finger running between the cleft of his ass and Tao moans, pushing against the pressure and letting his breath escape in a soft hiss as it breaches him up to the first knuckle. It’s been months since he’s bottomed and the burn lances up his spine, mingling with the soft sparks of pleasure drawn from the hands sliding over his chest, tweaking at nipples, a strange pleasure-pain medley that has him confused but not unwilling. He breathes deep and relaxes himself through the stretch, biting into the soft thighs of the person holding his wrist and smirking against the skin at the small yelp he elicits. When he’s stuffed three fingers deep and gasping, the hands around his wrists release and callused fingertips track over his neck, cupping his chin and tugging him forward until his lips brush against hard, hot skin and he willingly opens up, takes him in as the fingers slide out of his ass and he’s left clenching around nothing. Then there’s more wetness being smeared along his crack before the person pushes in, achingly slow.
If you asked Tao to recall that night, he could only tell you bits and pieces of what actually happened, the pressure of hands propping his hips up, the slow strokes of a tongue tracing designs into his skin, hands in his hair and feeling so full and open in a way he hadn’t in a long time. He would be able to remember how it felt like they ceased being three individuals and become one entity united in touch and sensation, the room their own little world where time stopped moving and they created their own reality. Most clearly, he can remember feeling so wanted , no longer the outsider, the actor fulfilling the fetish but someone who was cared for and held so lovingly.
Waking up is always Tao’s least favorite thing to do and worse so when he wakes up in between two warm bodies, both pressing into him, warm and solid and it would be so damn easy to fall back asleep but he forces himself up, limbs feeling like dead weights as he extracts himself from their embrace, eliciting a displeased whine from one of the sleeping forms that has him pressing a hand to his chest, trying desperately to stamp out the ache. In the half light of the sun peeking out from the horizon as dawn gives way to day, he moves silently around the room, a ghost-like figure collecting articles of clothing, his laptop, phone and hesitating briefly before removing and leaving his house keys on the bedside table. There’s a soft murmuring sound from behind him but he doesn’t look back, slinging the bag over his shoulder and exiting quietly, the soft click of the door the only sound he leaves in his wake.
The streets of Seoul have that tranquil air they only retain in the early hours of the morning, before the hordes come to claim the place. There’s only the chirping of the birds overhead and the low yells of truck drivers delivering supplies to stores. He takes the early bus to Gangnam, tipping his hat to the sleepy looking driver and spends the ride staring blankly out the window. From his stop, it’s a short walk around the corner and up a few flight of stairs till he’s knocking repeatedly on a door.
Minseok is still caught halfway in the Sandman’s trap when he opens the door, eyes blinking sleepily as he tries to process the image of Tao on his doorstep in his nightclothes with a duffel over his shoulder. “Taozi?” he murmurs, tone confused but warm as he beckoned him forward, opening the door wider.
Tao takes a deep breath as he steps in, letting the bag fall to the floor. “Hi, hyung.” There’s more things he means to say, explanations, apologies but it’s hard to get words out when you’re choking on sobs.
***
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