A myth that i have to believe in,
How could someone just slip away so fast? I wrote Scott today and i told him that he couldnt say "love ya" to me anymore.. b/c it hurts me too much.. and i told him that i still love him very much and that i thought that we were going to make it.. but i guess everything happens for a reason? right? it was sort of my fault for me feeling like this b/c i partically made him do it. im such an idiot.. but i didnt want him to feel bad about ever wanting to do this. Its just that i was soooo close to him. i have never felt so...cared for i guess. i dont really know what i am feeling.. it's very complicated.. I just didn't want to give him up, and everything around me reminds me of him.. everywhere i go reminds me of him... i can't tell him all this on the phone because i would start crying really bad and i didnt want him to feel bad. and change his mind just to make me happy b/c he would do something like that.. i want him to go out with me because he loves me and HE wants it.. not me.. b/c i would take him back.. He said it doesn't feel like we're broken up.. and that it's just like a little seperation to do our own thing...ugh... i dont know. i dont feel like talking about it anymore.