April Showers Brings... May Journaling!
May 6th, 2008
I feel like I owe the world and everyone in it something better than this. I feel like I owe myself something better than this. I feel like I am in the same spot as I was last year, minus the drugs and not knowing where my life was going. I still don’t know where I am going, but at least I have a place to be. But, right now, I just want to party. I don’t want to care again. It is so strange and confusing to be back in the state of mind, but at least I can feel something.
Being with the same person for such an extended amount of time really freaks me out. I feel like I’m in this cloud of love and it is so hazy I can’t find my way out. I can’t see clear when I’m in emotional relationships or maybe I see too clearly. I like the constant puzzle of chaos that comes with not being secure. I like that I have no idea where I will be from time to time.