"These years go by like trucks and trains, some hit so hard you barely feel the pain...
Lights out right now back then and forever more, lights out left now theres robots marching, to the nearest liquor store, there's something green that's leaving town, always thought it was blue, always knew I was wrong, where it goes hell knows, it's somewhere better than here, and what they say about the grass on the other sides true, too much time looking up's turning everything blue, including me, including you, including you, these times count down like boats and planes, some wash away with undertoes, some plummet down in flames, lights out right now back then and forever more, with sirens on this ambulance, is racing to the west coast shore, there's something blue thats leaving town, we always talked about black, we're considering brown, where it goes hell knows, maybe somewhere better than here, and what they say of the grass on the other sides true, too much time looking up's turning everything blue, including me, including the ocean, including you, feel the ocean blue, engulfing you, I view the deep blue sea, it's turning red, right in front of me, there's something grey that's leaving town, it's way beyond me how it get's off the ground, where it goes hell knows, but it's somewhere better than here, and what they say of the grass on the other sides true, too much tme looking up's turning everyting blue, including me, including the pilots, including you..."
I need to move out of this place... I'm going crazy. My insomnia is worsening, and the worst part is I can't do anything at those times. My mom is sleeping, in MY room. My grampa is having trouble sleeping in his bed, so he is sleeping in the living room, and that knocks out the kitchen. I can't write when I need to write, I can't sleep when I need to sleep, I can't leave when I want to leave. I feel like I'm 8 years old.
I really didn't want to move back home when I left my apartment, I told myself I wasn't going to. Then my brother and mom brought up the point that my grandparents were now going to have $200 less a month for rent if no one moved in with them, so I decided to temp move back. Well I haven't been able to pay them since november and this is a damned lot longer than temp. I've been here 8 months. That's longer than I lived in my apartment for total, and ironically with no car, I now work right NEXT to where I used to live. My credit's gone to shit, so even when I can finally afford to move out on my own again, which I'm shooting for July, it will have to be in some shitty mid-city apartment, far away from quality, my job, and desire.
I'm even starting to annoy myself with all my complaining, but I seriously have nothing good to vent about, its a gigantic amount of demoralization let me tell you...
Adam
I need to move out of this place... I'm going crazy. My insomnia is worsening, and the worst part is I can't do anything at those times. My mom is sleeping, in MY room. My grampa is having trouble sleeping in his bed, so he is sleeping in the living room, and that knocks out the kitchen. I can't write when I need to write, I can't sleep when I need to sleep, I can't leave when I want to leave. I feel like I'm 8 years old.
I really didn't want to move back home when I left my apartment, I told myself I wasn't going to. Then my brother and mom brought up the point that my grandparents were now going to have $200 less a month for rent if no one moved in with them, so I decided to temp move back. Well I haven't been able to pay them since november and this is a damned lot longer than temp. I've been here 8 months. That's longer than I lived in my apartment for total, and ironically with no car, I now work right NEXT to where I used to live. My credit's gone to shit, so even when I can finally afford to move out on my own again, which I'm shooting for July, it will have to be in some shitty mid-city apartment, far away from quality, my job, and desire.
I'm even starting to annoy myself with all my complaining, but I seriously have nothing good to vent about, its a gigantic amount of demoralization let me tell you...
Adam