Recap/picspam Gossip Girl 2.18 - The age of dissonance
Unlike Sirius Black, I have come back from behind the curtain. The curtain here being having switched from a laptop with Windows to a MacBook with Mac OSX. The problem? My monitor settings are the devil's spawn and won't let me make decent graphics. I'm still fighting, so I apologise for the quality of the images behind the cut.
But I just couldn't do a recap without visual evidence of how bad it was.
Let's take a look, shall we? Be warned, it's bitchy at times.
Gossip Girl 2.18. That's how many episodes? A lot, I know. And yet again they continue with the Blair-not-getting-into-Yale storyline! WHY? It is ridiculous. It should have ended with Blair not getting into Yale OR with the Blair getting into Yale because that girl she saved from the Miffy's muffy muffin situation told her uncle (or whatever her relation to the Dean was) Blair Waldorf was the coolest person on the planet. This is ridiculous. Period.
Then again, I am happy to see Nate again. And may I add that he looks handsome as fuck in that costume, with that hair? Yes, I may, because this is my recap. Hee!
Something else that we've been over: Vanessa's documentary making. How sad are you if all you do is make a gazillion documentaries about people who really don't want to be documented and are really not making a great documentary because you only get to film the tiniest bit of their lives? I feel sorry for Vanessa because there are two ways Vanessa gets screentime: as Nate's plus one (and then not and then again and then not - they are almost as bad as Dan and Serena) or as the person who apparently has details on everyone (especially Blair) and is dangerous-but-not-really. Point being, Vanessa in general makes for lousy filler.
Chuck has cheesy theme music. And a horrendous storyline. But a brilliant tie. He's still sexy as hell, but I am just going to turn the volume down whenever he's in the shot. I don't need to follow the storyline, it's too easy.
I really like Jenny's hair pulled back. Really. But what the hell is Miss Carr doing there? And what's with the note - and Rufus 'finding' it in such a very subtle way. Almost as subtle as the Vitamin Water product placement in the early episodes of the series, remember those?
Who else finds Serena's awful taste in men hilarious? And who else is finding Blair beyond annoying in her barging around accusing everyone of bringing her down? *yawns* I hear Nate's a great actor, so I'll stick around for that. (Translation: Yeah, for the first time ever, I now seriously have absolutely no idea why I'm watching this. There's no fashion this episode, there are nothing but boring storylines. Why am I still watching? Because somewhere next week or later, there will be kissing I'm actually interested in.)
Oh no. I did something stupid. I didn't turn down the volume and heard Elle say this: "I wanted to contact you - I felt like we had a connection. And Carter's rich so I thought he could help." *headdesk* Just... that is beyond stupid. That is Jessica Simpson ("Is this chicken?") stupid.
And another thing. The flowers in the VanderBass apartment (it will always be VanderBass, people!) are clearly fake, because I've seen that bouquet before. I'm not sure if it was in the same apartment or at Blair's but still. I am disappointed in you, set dressers. There are also two candleholders placed right next to each other in a strange way, what's up with that? Is that UES feng shui I'm just not familiar with?
No really, Chuck Bass doesn't know any better or just any other false ID maker than Carter Baizen? Seriously?! He has a PI on speed dial, but his best idea to smuggle this whore (no, she really is) out of the country is Carter Baizen? Who writes this show? Perhaps Little Jenny's (now thankfully fired) blind raccoon of a makeup artist's brother?
I like that Serena and Nate clearly are made for each other when it comes to cluelessness. Serena is such a dimwit sometimes, but at least she's much more entertaining when she's not with Dan.
Her hair looks amazing when she's trying to Cyrano-seduce Julian - and so does Vanessa on the phone. This is the one storyline that's entertaining me at the moment, it's sad that it's Vanessa's filler plot. And that said plot involves Nate being his not-so quick yet ready to misunderstand self. Maybe he'll even be hypocritical about it at the end of it all! [/sarcasm] See, I'm so confused about how much this show is letting me down that even my recap isn't making sense anymore. Somebody save me.
Gratuitous Nelly Yuki in a fat suit:
Hee!
"I am an actress. No, I am a seagull."
"No, you're a shameless bitch."
Blair's face: HILARIOUS PIECE OF WIN
If this show has been flushed down the toilet, can we at least have it be the Blair Waldorf show again? I liked that. Her dress has the most sexy back too.
Why is Rachel Carr even at this show? Can someone fill me in, because I must have missed something. Also, why is she wearing a top that is clearly three sizes too small and not only her boobs, but her everything are/is straining against the fabric? Don't they have mirrors in Iowa? (That was, of course, not directed at people in Iowa, because I don't even know people in Iowa.)
I just do not find Penn Badgley attractive. In the least. That really bugs me, because I mean, Nate's not that great of a character but at least Chace Crawford is pretty enough to make up for that. Dan is just... no, let's not go there again. Most people already know how I feel about Dan Humphrey, who is only mentioned here because really, this episode sucks so much I have to talk about everything. That means I also have to mention how grossed out I was by him apparently having got into character too much and... started kissing Rachel's wrist(?!). What the hell? It's not that I'm unimaginative, but it looks fairly ridiculous. Watch that scene again and tell me you didn't cringe.
Ahahahahaha, he's trying to do a British accent?! *dies laughing*
I'm going to mention Chuck's storyline again, because the man now sitting in his living room sipping scotch is the same man Chuck saw leaving the restaurant right after Carter. Chuck even frowned when he saw that. And now this? Le sigh.
Leighton's face is worth a million dollars. I mean that. When Julian is talking out of his ass about giving birth on stage? Priceless. But I don't buy the 'renowned theater critic' coming to the Constance school play and taking notes.
Julian did say something very subtle about Chace's Nate's acting. Cookies for anyone who giggled as well.
The part on stage was made of absolute and utter win. I'm still debating if it makes up for the complete failure that was the rest of the episode, but it is brilliant. I adore how you can see on Leighton's face what Blair's thinking after Nate's adorable outburst: "Oh... well, this could be helpful. Let's go with it." And the wave at the crowd? *bows down to that*
Oh noes, Elle used Chuck to get money (see, when I said she was a whore, I didn't mean it in a bad way, it was just a statement of fact). Woe!
DUDE! They have Vitamin Water product placement again! I think that just made the episode. I think all the cringing must have messed with my head because I'm downright giddy and laughing at everything now. Don't smoke pot, kids, just watch episode 2.18 of Gossip Girl.
I also giggled at Rufus just randomly standing in the kitchen waiting for a filler scene. And the tub of ice cream? You can almost see filming, can't you? Matthew: "Yeah, guys, this isn't really working. I don't have any purpose in this scene." Director: "Pete {or insert any other random name here}! Give Matthew a tub of ice cream!" At least Dan can write another story now.
I want to be married to Blair's last outfit of the episode. Oh my! It also looks gorgeous in the bar where she's sitting later. Leighton's acting in her scene with Blake is fan-fucking-tastic. And the fact that the olive is gone from her martini, very good.
Okay, I want to hear your honest opinion. I am a Chuck-Blair shipper. I don't mind them with other people (except Elle, because that was just... I mean... just no), but at heart, I want CB to end up together. And I know tons of CB shippers are ecstatic at Chuck making Dorota appear onscreen in her pajama's (I am excited for that as well, but not because of Chuck, but because of Dorota) - but isn't it just too little, too late? I don't want to spoil anyone, but I think it is, and this storyline is walking on very, very dangerous ground here.
Oh, Gossip Girl, what are we going to do with you?
Caps by luux_lu.
Enjoy and please leave me a comment to let me know what you thought about things! :)
But I just couldn't do a recap without visual evidence of how bad it was.
Let's take a look, shall we? Be warned, it's bitchy at times.
Gossip Girl 2.18. That's how many episodes? A lot, I know. And yet again they continue with the Blair-not-getting-into-Yale storyline! WHY? It is ridiculous. It should have ended with Blair not getting into Yale OR with the Blair getting into Yale because that girl she saved from the Miffy's muffy muffin situation told her uncle (or whatever her relation to the Dean was) Blair Waldorf was the coolest person on the planet. This is ridiculous. Period.
Then again, I am happy to see Nate again. And may I add that he looks handsome as fuck in that costume, with that hair? Yes, I may, because this is my recap. Hee!
Something else that we've been over: Vanessa's documentary making. How sad are you if all you do is make a gazillion documentaries about people who really don't want to be documented and are really not making a great documentary because you only get to film the tiniest bit of their lives? I feel sorry for Vanessa because there are two ways Vanessa gets screentime: as Nate's plus one (and then not and then again and then not - they are almost as bad as Dan and Serena) or as the person who apparently has details on everyone (especially Blair) and is dangerous-but-not-really. Point being, Vanessa in general makes for lousy filler.
Chuck has cheesy theme music. And a horrendous storyline. But a brilliant tie. He's still sexy as hell, but I am just going to turn the volume down whenever he's in the shot. I don't need to follow the storyline, it's too easy.
I really like Jenny's hair pulled back. Really. But what the hell is Miss Carr doing there? And what's with the note - and Rufus 'finding' it in such a very subtle way. Almost as subtle as the Vitamin Water product placement in the early episodes of the series, remember those?
Who else finds Serena's awful taste in men hilarious? And who else is finding Blair beyond annoying in her barging around accusing everyone of bringing her down? *yawns* I hear Nate's a great actor, so I'll stick around for that. (Translation: Yeah, for the first time ever, I now seriously have absolutely no idea why I'm watching this. There's no fashion this episode, there are nothing but boring storylines. Why am I still watching? Because somewhere next week or later, there will be kissing I'm actually interested in.)
Oh no. I did something stupid. I didn't turn down the volume and heard Elle say this: "I wanted to contact you - I felt like we had a connection. And Carter's rich so I thought he could help." *headdesk* Just... that is beyond stupid. That is Jessica Simpson ("Is this chicken?") stupid.
And another thing. The flowers in the VanderBass apartment (it will always be VanderBass, people!) are clearly fake, because I've seen that bouquet before. I'm not sure if it was in the same apartment or at Blair's but still. I am disappointed in you, set dressers. There are also two candleholders placed right next to each other in a strange way, what's up with that? Is that UES feng shui I'm just not familiar with?
No really, Chuck Bass doesn't know any better or just any other false ID maker than Carter Baizen? Seriously?! He has a PI on speed dial, but his best idea to smuggle this whore (no, she really is) out of the country is Carter Baizen? Who writes this show? Perhaps Little Jenny's (now thankfully fired) blind raccoon of a makeup artist's brother?
I like that Serena and Nate clearly are made for each other when it comes to cluelessness. Serena is such a dimwit sometimes, but at least she's much more entertaining when she's not with Dan.
Her hair looks amazing when she's trying to Cyrano-seduce Julian - and so does Vanessa on the phone. This is the one storyline that's entertaining me at the moment, it's sad that it's Vanessa's filler plot. And that said plot involves Nate being his not-so quick yet ready to misunderstand self. Maybe he'll even be hypocritical about it at the end of it all! [/sarcasm] See, I'm so confused about how much this show is letting me down that even my recap isn't making sense anymore. Somebody save me.
Gratuitous Nelly Yuki in a fat suit:
Hee!
"I am an actress. No, I am a seagull."
"No, you're a shameless bitch."
Blair's face: HILARIOUS PIECE OF WIN
If this show has been flushed down the toilet, can we at least have it be the Blair Waldorf show again? I liked that. Her dress has the most sexy back too.
Why is Rachel Carr even at this show? Can someone fill me in, because I must have missed something. Also, why is she wearing a top that is clearly three sizes too small and not only her boobs, but her everything are/is straining against the fabric? Don't they have mirrors in Iowa? (That was, of course, not directed at people in Iowa, because I don't even know people in Iowa.)
I just do not find Penn Badgley attractive. In the least. That really bugs me, because I mean, Nate's not that great of a character but at least Chace Crawford is pretty enough to make up for that. Dan is just... no, let's not go there again. Most people already know how I feel about Dan Humphrey, who is only mentioned here because really, this episode sucks so much I have to talk about everything. That means I also have to mention how grossed out I was by him apparently having got into character too much and... started kissing Rachel's wrist(?!). What the hell? It's not that I'm unimaginative, but it looks fairly ridiculous. Watch that scene again and tell me you didn't cringe.
Ahahahahaha, he's trying to do a British accent?! *dies laughing*
I'm going to mention Chuck's storyline again, because the man now sitting in his living room sipping scotch is the same man Chuck saw leaving the restaurant right after Carter. Chuck even frowned when he saw that. And now this? Le sigh.
Leighton's face is worth a million dollars. I mean that. When Julian is talking out of his ass about giving birth on stage? Priceless. But I don't buy the 'renowned theater critic' coming to the Constance school play and taking notes.
Julian did say something very subtle about Chace's Nate's acting. Cookies for anyone who giggled as well.
The part on stage was made of absolute and utter win. I'm still debating if it makes up for the complete failure that was the rest of the episode, but it is brilliant. I adore how you can see on Leighton's face what Blair's thinking after Nate's adorable outburst: "Oh... well, this could be helpful. Let's go with it." And the wave at the crowd? *bows down to that*
Oh noes, Elle used Chuck to get money (see, when I said she was a whore, I didn't mean it in a bad way, it was just a statement of fact). Woe!
DUDE! They have Vitamin Water product placement again! I think that just made the episode. I think all the cringing must have messed with my head because I'm downright giddy and laughing at everything now. Don't smoke pot, kids, just watch episode 2.18 of Gossip Girl.
I also giggled at Rufus just randomly standing in the kitchen waiting for a filler scene. And the tub of ice cream? You can almost see filming, can't you? Matthew: "Yeah, guys, this isn't really working. I don't have any purpose in this scene." Director: "Pete {or insert any other random name here}! Give Matthew a tub of ice cream!" At least Dan can write another story now.
I want to be married to Blair's last outfit of the episode. Oh my! It also looks gorgeous in the bar where she's sitting later. Leighton's acting in her scene with Blake is fan-fucking-tastic. And the fact that the olive is gone from her martini, very good.
Okay, I want to hear your honest opinion. I am a Chuck-Blair shipper. I don't mind them with other people (except Elle, because that was just... I mean... just no), but at heart, I want CB to end up together. And I know tons of CB shippers are ecstatic at Chuck making Dorota appear onscreen in her pajama's (I am excited for that as well, but not because of Chuck, but because of Dorota) - but isn't it just too little, too late? I don't want to spoil anyone, but I think it is, and this storyline is walking on very, very dangerous ground here.
Oh, Gossip Girl, what are we going to do with you?
Caps by luux_lu.
Enjoy and please leave me a comment to let me know what you thought about things! :)