Unwashed Masses
This weekend we went to Hersheypark - we voted that it was what we'd spend our change jar on, & we wanted to have a "family experience" of it, since we don't do all that much special stuff just the three of us. Now that we are home, I have many thoughts on this phenomenon:
1) Never. ever. go to a theme park on a 95 degree day at the end of summer. There were just too many people - the crowds were utterly unmanageable and there was NOTHING that didn't require sitting in an agonizingly hot 2 hour line (in some cases, even the bathrooms). So we went to the "water park" area - which was just more rides with lines - no lazy river or wave pool there! After three hours of bickering, sweating & pushing through crowds of other sweating and bickering people, we finally managed to get onto a ride - it was a boogie board surfing ride where you cling desperately to both the board and your modesty as the force of the water in the simulated wave threatens to push you uphill and into a wall, while simultaneously ripping off your swimsuit. They actually had blankets ready to throw over people when they became exposed. But anyway, after five hours there, we had managed to ride exactly two rides. Then they shut everything down for lightening in the vicinity. Twice (considering this was a total of about 3 hours, I think I'm entitled to at least that percent of my day in refund). Then it stormed. Which did have the effect of making everyone else leave, so once things started operating again we pretty much walked onto anything we wanted for the rest of the very short evening. Wish it would've stormed at 2 instead of 8.
2) I have no more faith in human nature. Aside from being jabbed, stepped on, pushed, etc., I saw so much parental cruelty, and so many parents setting sinfully bad examples by helping their children cut to the front of the 2 hour lines the rest of us stood (more or less) patiently in, that I cannot even hold the whole thing in my mind at once. I spoke up once and was told "they're only children!". Is anyone actually raising children these days?! Even C was appalled.
3) I felt like a cash machine. Money for the tickets. Money for the utterly disgusting junk food ($10 for a corn dog combo?!) - and eating was basically all there was to do during the endless steamy waits (did I mention that all brought food was confiscated on the way into the park?). Money for games. Money for miscellaneous extra stuff. I cannot recall the last time I felt like such a consumer. May it be longer still until I feel it again.
4) There are too many conflicting agendas for everyone to enjoy a themepark visit. Finding things we can all do that doesn't keep someone waiting and doing nothing for 2-3 hours is nigh onto impossible. Of course waiting in line for 2 hours for a 5 minute ride isn't exactly better & believe me, there's just no way to entertain one another in lines like that for an entire day. How can something be stressful AND boring at the same time? Grandparents go just for the kids' sake, and not to try to have any fun of their own, god bless em. I am content to leave themeparks to the grandparents from now on.
5) relatively cheap motels are now being built to resemble the nicer economy hotels. The difference: effective sound barriers. Noise. All. Night. Long. And I will not even go into the fact that our floor had both smoking & non-smoking rooms on it.
6) it's Hershey freakin' park - where was all the chocolate? What is the point in going somewhere named after chocolate if they're not going to feed it into the water fountain or pour vats of it over your head? Fool me twice, "Hershey" park, fool me twice.
Conclusion: Six Flags has a full on waterpark that is closer, better, and cheaper. If I somehow need to get a fix of heavy crowds, rude people, and overpriced godawful food, I'll go there - where at least I can park my tired ass in the lazy river while C takes endless tours of the waterslides in 15 minutes or less.
Uh, so...anyone for Renfaire? :)
1) Never. ever. go to a theme park on a 95 degree day at the end of summer. There were just too many people - the crowds were utterly unmanageable and there was NOTHING that didn't require sitting in an agonizingly hot 2 hour line (in some cases, even the bathrooms). So we went to the "water park" area - which was just more rides with lines - no lazy river or wave pool there! After three hours of bickering, sweating & pushing through crowds of other sweating and bickering people, we finally managed to get onto a ride - it was a boogie board surfing ride where you cling desperately to both the board and your modesty as the force of the water in the simulated wave threatens to push you uphill and into a wall, while simultaneously ripping off your swimsuit. They actually had blankets ready to throw over people when they became exposed. But anyway, after five hours there, we had managed to ride exactly two rides. Then they shut everything down for lightening in the vicinity. Twice (considering this was a total of about 3 hours, I think I'm entitled to at least that percent of my day in refund). Then it stormed. Which did have the effect of making everyone else leave, so once things started operating again we pretty much walked onto anything we wanted for the rest of the very short evening. Wish it would've stormed at 2 instead of 8.
2) I have no more faith in human nature. Aside from being jabbed, stepped on, pushed, etc., I saw so much parental cruelty, and so many parents setting sinfully bad examples by helping their children cut to the front of the 2 hour lines the rest of us stood (more or less) patiently in, that I cannot even hold the whole thing in my mind at once. I spoke up once and was told "they're only children!". Is anyone actually raising children these days?! Even C was appalled.
3) I felt like a cash machine. Money for the tickets. Money for the utterly disgusting junk food ($10 for a corn dog combo?!) - and eating was basically all there was to do during the endless steamy waits (did I mention that all brought food was confiscated on the way into the park?). Money for games. Money for miscellaneous extra stuff. I cannot recall the last time I felt like such a consumer. May it be longer still until I feel it again.
4) There are too many conflicting agendas for everyone to enjoy a themepark visit. Finding things we can all do that doesn't keep someone waiting and doing nothing for 2-3 hours is nigh onto impossible. Of course waiting in line for 2 hours for a 5 minute ride isn't exactly better & believe me, there's just no way to entertain one another in lines like that for an entire day. How can something be stressful AND boring at the same time? Grandparents go just for the kids' sake, and not to try to have any fun of their own, god bless em. I am content to leave themeparks to the grandparents from now on.
5) relatively cheap motels are now being built to resemble the nicer economy hotels. The difference: effective sound barriers. Noise. All. Night. Long. And I will not even go into the fact that our floor had both smoking & non-smoking rooms on it.
6) it's Hershey freakin' park - where was all the chocolate? What is the point in going somewhere named after chocolate if they're not going to feed it into the water fountain or pour vats of it over your head? Fool me twice, "Hershey" park, fool me twice.
Conclusion: Six Flags has a full on waterpark that is closer, better, and cheaper. If I somehow need to get a fix of heavy crowds, rude people, and overpriced godawful food, I'll go there - where at least I can park my tired ass in the lazy river while C takes endless tours of the waterslides in 15 minutes or less.
Uh, so...anyone for Renfaire? :)