"Some people wear their heart on their sleeve-I wear mine under my left pantleg strapped to my boot"
If I could even begin to describe how I feel right now, i'm almost surely positive that it would evaporate into the air, losing all its value. But maybe I belong in the air. In the clouds.
I run my time with him over and over again in my head, until he occupies each and every capillary and white blood cell I own.
It's like he fills my silence with his. So that our silences are together...which is why I can tolerate it. In a room void of all entertainment sources I can still find solace in being with him. He's a pure feeling.
His laugh completes my soul. I've always thought of myself as a complete person. and this is now decidingly so.
My grandma goes, "Stacy..of course now, after all your years in highschool, NOW you have to go and find someone you really care about"..and then I replied, "yes, grandma, but I had never met Julian before".
And yet there's a sense of fear and self-doubt in him. Not in I, though, for I haven't an ounce of hesitation when it comes to knowing how I feel about him. If only I could bring myself to say it TO him, and not about him... I tell myself that i've a history of "jumping the gun" (and i've been called out on it by friends as well) and being too much too fast...so I want to wait. Until it's perfect. But he's scared for some reason. Scared of hurting me, scared of being hurt by me, scared of showing himself, afraid of things messing up. but he fails to realize that it's not going to mess up. It can't. We are fail-safe.
He kisses my hand while we're driving and i'm likely to go into cardiac arrest because he's just so emotionally overpowering.
He's incredible.
and things are great. I couldn't be happier with anyone else. Fear or no fear, he's still one of the most wonderful people i've ever met. That's not high expectations talking,either. The only thing I could ever hope to expect from him is his willingness to stay grounded with me, or to tell me when he's ready to fly...because I can take him to the clouds with me.
Federico Fellini once said, "There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the infinite passion of life."
and so it is.
I run my time with him over and over again in my head, until he occupies each and every capillary and white blood cell I own.
It's like he fills my silence with his. So that our silences are together...which is why I can tolerate it. In a room void of all entertainment sources I can still find solace in being with him. He's a pure feeling.
His laugh completes my soul. I've always thought of myself as a complete person. and this is now decidingly so.
My grandma goes, "Stacy..of course now, after all your years in highschool, NOW you have to go and find someone you really care about"..and then I replied, "yes, grandma, but I had never met Julian before".
And yet there's a sense of fear and self-doubt in him. Not in I, though, for I haven't an ounce of hesitation when it comes to knowing how I feel about him. If only I could bring myself to say it TO him, and not about him... I tell myself that i've a history of "jumping the gun" (and i've been called out on it by friends as well) and being too much too fast...so I want to wait. Until it's perfect. But he's scared for some reason. Scared of hurting me, scared of being hurt by me, scared of showing himself, afraid of things messing up. but he fails to realize that it's not going to mess up. It can't. We are fail-safe.
He kisses my hand while we're driving and i'm likely to go into cardiac arrest because he's just so emotionally overpowering.
He's incredible.
and things are great. I couldn't be happier with anyone else. Fear or no fear, he's still one of the most wonderful people i've ever met. That's not high expectations talking,either. The only thing I could ever hope to expect from him is his willingness to stay grounded with me, or to tell me when he's ready to fly...because I can take him to the clouds with me.
Federico Fellini once said, "There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the infinite passion of life."
and so it is.