Bad news
I checked my emails this morning hoping to get something from my grandmother, as she's made a habit of always emailing me on Sundays. But I received nothing on Sunday. Instead I got an email from my mum telling me that my granny had a fall which was caused by a heart attack.
Needless to say it's been a fucked up day for me. I thought work would help keep my mind off it but it really didn't.
My mum said my granny is alright and seems to be in a better part of the hospital than when she was last time there for an operation many years ago. So that' at least something positive. She's not in pain, she's just recovering.
In a way I'm glad I wasn't there when it happened. I remember how I reacted when I found out she had Shingles. I nearly fainted. I'd probably have just about died had I been there. And yet being this far away from my family makes me feel so helpless. I can't go see her, I can't be there if she gets worse. And if she dies while I'm stuck in Canada... I don't even know.
She's the most important person in my life and I definitely know I'm being selfish for wanting her around when she herself would just rather have it all over and done with.
I just want her to be well. And for her to still be around when I get back.
Needless to say it's been a fucked up day for me. I thought work would help keep my mind off it but it really didn't.
My mum said my granny is alright and seems to be in a better part of the hospital than when she was last time there for an operation many years ago. So that' at least something positive. She's not in pain, she's just recovering.
In a way I'm glad I wasn't there when it happened. I remember how I reacted when I found out she had Shingles. I nearly fainted. I'd probably have just about died had I been there. And yet being this far away from my family makes me feel so helpless. I can't go see her, I can't be there if she gets worse. And if she dies while I'm stuck in Canada... I don't even know.
She's the most important person in my life and I definitely know I'm being selfish for wanting her around when she herself would just rather have it all over and done with.
I just want her to be well. And for her to still be around when I get back.