reviews and slight annoyances...
Spring is here!
Damn straight it's here. It's as if Spring packed all her bags weeks ago and couldn't jump into Winters position soon enough. She probably went to the office where Winter works, camped out and was banging on the door to take over the shift three days in advance. As soon as the door creaked open Spring probably tore the door down and yanked poor old Winter out. Winter should file a restraining order or something. Actually... that's probably what Winter did because it's going to be raining tomorrow. Spring must be sad... but still radiant enough to make it warm enough to break out all the summer gear.
But I like it. The warmth, the breeze, the colour returning to the world. Not the insects though. Those should be banned.
I watched Silent Hill on Thursday.
I have not been this excited about a movie in a while. In fact... Silent Hill only came out Thursday. The last movie I went to see on its release day was TTT. I usually don't bother going to see movies as soon as they come out. But despite the bad review the movie got I was very eager to watch it. I am no Silent Hill game fan. How could I be? I've only played about half an hour of Silent Hill 2. Hardly enough to convert anyone. I was eager to see this movie though because I did actually play a bit of the series, so I understand about the atmosphere and definitely the music. Thinking about it... it was probably the fact that I would be listening to music taken from the actual games that got me really excited. I love the OST for the third game a lot and lucky for me there was a fair few pieces from that in the movie. They even had a song playing which I squeed over.
I was determined to like this movie aesthetically and I knew the plot has a lot of undesirable things in it. I am starting to learn to never go into a movie with high expectations. The worse you think it will be the better the outcome usually, as you don't hype yourself up, leaving yourself wide open for disappointment.
The plot goes like this... Woman has an adopted child who has nightmares and sleepwalks and talks. Child constantly mentions a place named Silent Hill. Mother, instead of listening to her much smarted husband, decides that her daughter has to be taken back to the town instead of seeing a doctor. On the way to sleepy ol' Silent Hill... and btw... the 'tourist' websites of the place were under no circumstances ideal in any sense of the word. More like a big 'Do Not Come Here' sign. Anyway... on the way to the town our smart lil' mother catches the attention of one very suspicious and annoying cop who ends up following her in a high speed chase. And because both these women were speeding they end up crashing due to bad visibility, snow and.. oh yeah... something dark running across the road, lol!
So the mothers daughter goes missing in Silent Hill and she has to go find her. She runs around a bit screaming for her baby, finds some monsters, runs away, runs back, this time with crappy reinforcements and ends up finding more monsters and following a trail her daughter has left.
That pretty much sums up the first half of the movie. I am typing all this in loving cynicism. The first half felt like Silent Hill from what I've played of it. I am utterly smitten by the monsters. Especially Pyramid Head, or otherwise known as Red Pyramid Thing. Ehehehe! You cannot possibly fathom how fricking COOL he is unless you've seen him in action.
I am going to rant a bit on what he/it looks like and what makes him'it cool, so consider this a spoiler if you have not seen the movie. Pyramid Head... well he's got one huge arsed knife. I like to say knife because sword... sword does not suit him. He is like a butcher. Hulking, a blood splattered apron the only clothing he has. The apron is made of skin in the movie. Madness! So imagine it... you're stuck in a school corridor, it is dark, you've seen creepy and scary shit and been at deaths door several times already. Then you hear this scraping noise from nowhere. Metal being dragged along the ground. And then you see this massive... thing... coming towards you. A helmet in the shape of a weird arsed pyramid obscuring all features, but everything about it screams malice. Oh yeah baby! I love you Pyramid Head! He's so f*ing cool.
Ok.. end of spoiler, more or less. I was really impressed that most of the monsters were not actually CGI'ed. They looked so fantastic in their environments. The atmosphere was also creepy. There really is little actual horror in this movie. It's done subtley. You have a very steady dread washing over you. Like slowly decending into madness. It is a gradual process. You know you should be scared so you are wary and before you know it there's that uneasy dread in the back of your mind telling you that it's never going to be safe. That something is going to happen. The bad things are never out of the blue. It builds up beautifully. So instead of horror, where you are being bombarded with scare tactics this one eats into you slowly. I find it more like a thriller too as it messes with your mind. You sit there thinking, trying to piece the puzzle together, trying to make sense of it all.
That is were the plot fails. Some things are too obvious. The twists and turns the game would take aren't present. It's all pretty clear cut. But that is where the second half of the movie comes into it. The second half is pretty much all backstory driven. You get a pretty clear indication of when the movie shifts. Once our poor mother enters the Church things change. It becomes about the Cult which the first half started touching on. I can't say much about this without spoiling, so I'll just refrain. But I would like to say that... the first half was just fine. There was gore and gross insinuations but that stuff was awesome and nothing compared to the utter... I mean utter grossness and ... blood porn of the second half. That. Was. Gross. Especially if you're a woman... it's even worse. Ugh. It was tasteless but oh so cool none the less.
Sean Beans role in this movie was utterly pointless. Only served to mind fuck the audience but other than that was of very little value.
The true hero's of this movie are the monsters, music and atmosphere. I salute you Silent Hill.
I finally found the Gungrave: uno "righthead" OST. FINALLY!. Was a bit ridiculous. I've had the game and the "lefthead" OST for years now, but only now found the first OST. Ah well. Better late than never. There's a song on it called 'clue' which is nifty. And all this simply reminds me that I need to finish watching the series. Sigh.
I also downloaded the FFX-2 International Last Mission OST. That is where the orchestral Jade version of 1000 Words was hiding. DAMN! They also have the short version of 1000 Words without all the in game background noise. Why didn't I get this years ago? I suck. But now I have a good version of 1000 Words orchestral where the damn volume doesn't drop as the song climaxes more and more.
What else... Oh yes... my window broke. I was opening both my windows this morning as I usually do. I pull one which is a stubborn bastard and it jumped out of it's... what to call it... it's track. And I couldn't slide it further in either direction, nor push it back in because I am a weak and feeble woman. Then I decided to open my other window which usually slides nicely open and voila! That one breaks... literally. The frame broke off from the glass. My dad was in a bad mood when I told him about the windows which didn't make him any happier. He eventually did come into my room after having told me to fix it myself. Yeah... once he looked at my windows he could see that I couldn't fix it myself. Mark fixed my jammed window but there's not much they can do about the broken one. It's closed for the tie being. I have to call... a... window.. repairman. Do such people exist?
I have been eating a lot lately. I also think I'm getting hormonal again. A mixture of Spring and periods, I am sure. Sigh. I was so damn grumpy through Karate today, for no reason. I'm glad they didn't make me do spaaring.
And what am I going to do folks? Alex hates me. He really fucking hates me. He's still got a DVD of mine. I want Love Letter back! And I still have a book of his, which I want to finish reading but I have no time right now. I really want my DVD back. I've been wanting to show it to Rowena for ages now. But... he hates me. I can't talk to him. He just ignores me. How am I going to get my stuff back? How am I gonna get his stuff back?
I mean... I wrote him an e-mail, apologising for having upset him, but pointing out that I was not sorry for what I had said, because it is so fucking true, it's not even funny. This situation right now just shows how true it all is. I wasn't rude in the e-mail. I was just very realistic about the whole thing (or at least I was in my opinion) and I told him, if he wasn't willing to talk this out like grown ups I'm just going to remove him from my life. I don't need this. I don't deserve it. I am not willing to put up with childish people. I gave him a week to respond. I outright refuse to play his little drama queen games. I refuse to bow to him and to grovel. Sadly I only realised yesterday that he still has some of my stuff and I his. I cannot shut him out when he doens't respond to me by next week. Because I am positive that he will not respond. It's just like him. Or, better yet, he'll respond the day after the deadline or something like that to make sure if I was serious about never speaking with him again. I have decided that I do not want to play games like this with anyone, ever. All this psychology crap makes my head ache. But... what am I going to do? I am far too stubborn and dare I say have my pride to go against what I have promised myself. I suppose I can get some intermediary person to return his book to him and get my DVD back. I could buy the DVD again on eBay, no problem. But I feel rotten for keeping someone esles stuff. I honestly want to give it back to him, even though I'm not finished yet and I think it is a fantastic book. I feel like I'm getting a divorce or something, lol! What with having to return all of someones stuff. But... it's really not that funny. I have never cut someone out of my life like this. I really don't want to either. Sure, people have drifted in and out of my life gently, but to do it this forcefully... I really wish it doesn't have to come to this, but I am definitely not holding my breath. I still lay awake sometimes and just wonder if I should call him. If I could patch things up. I have absolutely no positive feelings towards him any longer but I dispise disliking people and being disliked by others. I can handle mutual disinterest. I can handle being an acquaintance and a person not caring about what happens to me. But to have these negative feelings for someone... for someone I actually dated... it makes me sick. And it upsets me that I was ever with a person who could be so... vile. So hateful, unfair and most of all childish. Someone who goes so much against my policy of 'we can talk things out'.
And I am hopeless. I have never had to deal with this sort of thing before. I don't know how to handle it. I don't know how to handle him. I'm sure he wants something from me. I'm sure he wants me to profusely apologise and beg for forgiveness. I am sure of it. Why am I so sure? Because if it was anyone else I would do it. I would fight for a friendship. I would try and talk it through. Had he responded to me the first two times I would have apologised and really meant it. But the more he is like this, the more he shamelessly is online without saying a word, or responding, the more I get angry. The more stubborn I get. The more I never want to speak to him again and have that be a 'Ha, in your damn face, I don't need you or this crap!'. And I am mad at myself for thinking this much about it. For yet again, writing a damn LJ entry about it. I am angry at myself for not moving on. But this is why the ultimatum I gave him is so important. If it weren't for that damn DVD of mine and the book of his. If I don't have my DVD back I'm gonna keep thinking about him having it. If I see that book I'm gonna keep feeling guilty for having it.
And what if he reads this and now knows how to get me and uses it as payback! AAAAAGH!...
Has Ili officially gone paranoid? Just for that I'm not friends locking this post, lol!
I am mightily addicted to this song by Azure Ray
Sleep
Fill these spaces up with days
in my room you can go you can stay
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
Now these years locked in my drawer
I'll open to see just to be sure
And so i'm reaching out for the one
And so i've learned the meaning of the sun
And all this like a message comes to shift my point of view
And watching through my own light
As it tints the shade of you
Hold my wine hold it in
Nobody's lost but nobody wins
And I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
And so i'm reaching out for the one
And so i've learned the meaning of the sun
And all this like a message comes to shift my point of view
And watching through my own light
As it tints the shade of you
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, i cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
It's so gentle and soothing. *sways*
I still have not started my essay.
And Adelaide is just around the corner. I am so happy about it. Honest. No matter how I feel, if I think about being in Adelaide for five days with my friends I feel uber happy and excited. This day cannot come soon enough. And yet I am glad I have something like this to look forward to.
Sometimes I read over what I have written and think... 'You make no fucking sense'.
Ja Ne!
Damn straight it's here. It's as if Spring packed all her bags weeks ago and couldn't jump into Winters position soon enough. She probably went to the office where Winter works, camped out and was banging on the door to take over the shift three days in advance. As soon as the door creaked open Spring probably tore the door down and yanked poor old Winter out. Winter should file a restraining order or something. Actually... that's probably what Winter did because it's going to be raining tomorrow. Spring must be sad... but still radiant enough to make it warm enough to break out all the summer gear.
But I like it. The warmth, the breeze, the colour returning to the world. Not the insects though. Those should be banned.
I watched Silent Hill on Thursday.
I have not been this excited about a movie in a while. In fact... Silent Hill only came out Thursday. The last movie I went to see on its release day was TTT. I usually don't bother going to see movies as soon as they come out. But despite the bad review the movie got I was very eager to watch it. I am no Silent Hill game fan. How could I be? I've only played about half an hour of Silent Hill 2. Hardly enough to convert anyone. I was eager to see this movie though because I did actually play a bit of the series, so I understand about the atmosphere and definitely the music. Thinking about it... it was probably the fact that I would be listening to music taken from the actual games that got me really excited. I love the OST for the third game a lot and lucky for me there was a fair few pieces from that in the movie. They even had a song playing which I squeed over.
I was determined to like this movie aesthetically and I knew the plot has a lot of undesirable things in it. I am starting to learn to never go into a movie with high expectations. The worse you think it will be the better the outcome usually, as you don't hype yourself up, leaving yourself wide open for disappointment.
The plot goes like this... Woman has an adopted child who has nightmares and sleepwalks and talks. Child constantly mentions a place named Silent Hill. Mother, instead of listening to her much smarted husband, decides that her daughter has to be taken back to the town instead of seeing a doctor. On the way to sleepy ol' Silent Hill... and btw... the 'tourist' websites of the place were under no circumstances ideal in any sense of the word. More like a big 'Do Not Come Here' sign. Anyway... on the way to the town our smart lil' mother catches the attention of one very suspicious and annoying cop who ends up following her in a high speed chase. And because both these women were speeding they end up crashing due to bad visibility, snow and.. oh yeah... something dark running across the road, lol!
So the mothers daughter goes missing in Silent Hill and she has to go find her. She runs around a bit screaming for her baby, finds some monsters, runs away, runs back, this time with crappy reinforcements and ends up finding more monsters and following a trail her daughter has left.
That pretty much sums up the first half of the movie. I am typing all this in loving cynicism. The first half felt like Silent Hill from what I've played of it. I am utterly smitten by the monsters. Especially Pyramid Head, or otherwise known as Red Pyramid Thing. Ehehehe! You cannot possibly fathom how fricking COOL he is unless you've seen him in action.
I am going to rant a bit on what he/it looks like and what makes him'it cool, so consider this a spoiler if you have not seen the movie. Pyramid Head... well he's got one huge arsed knife. I like to say knife because sword... sword does not suit him. He is like a butcher. Hulking, a blood splattered apron the only clothing he has. The apron is made of skin in the movie. Madness! So imagine it... you're stuck in a school corridor, it is dark, you've seen creepy and scary shit and been at deaths door several times already. Then you hear this scraping noise from nowhere. Metal being dragged along the ground. And then you see this massive... thing... coming towards you. A helmet in the shape of a weird arsed pyramid obscuring all features, but everything about it screams malice. Oh yeah baby! I love you Pyramid Head! He's so f*ing cool.
Ok.. end of spoiler, more or less. I was really impressed that most of the monsters were not actually CGI'ed. They looked so fantastic in their environments. The atmosphere was also creepy. There really is little actual horror in this movie. It's done subtley. You have a very steady dread washing over you. Like slowly decending into madness. It is a gradual process. You know you should be scared so you are wary and before you know it there's that uneasy dread in the back of your mind telling you that it's never going to be safe. That something is going to happen. The bad things are never out of the blue. It builds up beautifully. So instead of horror, where you are being bombarded with scare tactics this one eats into you slowly. I find it more like a thriller too as it messes with your mind. You sit there thinking, trying to piece the puzzle together, trying to make sense of it all.
That is were the plot fails. Some things are too obvious. The twists and turns the game would take aren't present. It's all pretty clear cut. But that is where the second half of the movie comes into it. The second half is pretty much all backstory driven. You get a pretty clear indication of when the movie shifts. Once our poor mother enters the Church things change. It becomes about the Cult which the first half started touching on. I can't say much about this without spoiling, so I'll just refrain. But I would like to say that... the first half was just fine. There was gore and gross insinuations but that stuff was awesome and nothing compared to the utter... I mean utter grossness and ... blood porn of the second half. That. Was. Gross. Especially if you're a woman... it's even worse. Ugh. It was tasteless but oh so cool none the less.
Sean Beans role in this movie was utterly pointless. Only served to mind fuck the audience but other than that was of very little value.
The true hero's of this movie are the monsters, music and atmosphere. I salute you Silent Hill.
I finally found the Gungrave: uno "righthead" OST. FINALLY!. Was a bit ridiculous. I've had the game and the "lefthead" OST for years now, but only now found the first OST. Ah well. Better late than never. There's a song on it called 'clue' which is nifty. And all this simply reminds me that I need to finish watching the series. Sigh.
I also downloaded the FFX-2 International Last Mission OST. That is where the orchestral Jade version of 1000 Words was hiding. DAMN! They also have the short version of 1000 Words without all the in game background noise. Why didn't I get this years ago? I suck. But now I have a good version of 1000 Words orchestral where the damn volume doesn't drop as the song climaxes more and more.
What else... Oh yes... my window broke. I was opening both my windows this morning as I usually do. I pull one which is a stubborn bastard and it jumped out of it's... what to call it... it's track. And I couldn't slide it further in either direction, nor push it back in because I am a weak and feeble woman. Then I decided to open my other window which usually slides nicely open and voila! That one breaks... literally. The frame broke off from the glass. My dad was in a bad mood when I told him about the windows which didn't make him any happier. He eventually did come into my room after having told me to fix it myself. Yeah... once he looked at my windows he could see that I couldn't fix it myself. Mark fixed my jammed window but there's not much they can do about the broken one. It's closed for the tie being. I have to call... a... window.. repairman. Do such people exist?
I have been eating a lot lately. I also think I'm getting hormonal again. A mixture of Spring and periods, I am sure. Sigh. I was so damn grumpy through Karate today, for no reason. I'm glad they didn't make me do spaaring.
And what am I going to do folks? Alex hates me. He really fucking hates me. He's still got a DVD of mine. I want Love Letter back! And I still have a book of his, which I want to finish reading but I have no time right now. I really want my DVD back. I've been wanting to show it to Rowena for ages now. But... he hates me. I can't talk to him. He just ignores me. How am I going to get my stuff back? How am I gonna get his stuff back?
I mean... I wrote him an e-mail, apologising for having upset him, but pointing out that I was not sorry for what I had said, because it is so fucking true, it's not even funny. This situation right now just shows how true it all is. I wasn't rude in the e-mail. I was just very realistic about the whole thing (or at least I was in my opinion) and I told him, if he wasn't willing to talk this out like grown ups I'm just going to remove him from my life. I don't need this. I don't deserve it. I am not willing to put up with childish people. I gave him a week to respond. I outright refuse to play his little drama queen games. I refuse to bow to him and to grovel. Sadly I only realised yesterday that he still has some of my stuff and I his. I cannot shut him out when he doens't respond to me by next week. Because I am positive that he will not respond. It's just like him. Or, better yet, he'll respond the day after the deadline or something like that to make sure if I was serious about never speaking with him again. I have decided that I do not want to play games like this with anyone, ever. All this psychology crap makes my head ache. But... what am I going to do? I am far too stubborn and dare I say have my pride to go against what I have promised myself. I suppose I can get some intermediary person to return his book to him and get my DVD back. I could buy the DVD again on eBay, no problem. But I feel rotten for keeping someone esles stuff. I honestly want to give it back to him, even though I'm not finished yet and I think it is a fantastic book. I feel like I'm getting a divorce or something, lol! What with having to return all of someones stuff. But... it's really not that funny. I have never cut someone out of my life like this. I really don't want to either. Sure, people have drifted in and out of my life gently, but to do it this forcefully... I really wish it doesn't have to come to this, but I am definitely not holding my breath. I still lay awake sometimes and just wonder if I should call him. If I could patch things up. I have absolutely no positive feelings towards him any longer but I dispise disliking people and being disliked by others. I can handle mutual disinterest. I can handle being an acquaintance and a person not caring about what happens to me. But to have these negative feelings for someone... for someone I actually dated... it makes me sick. And it upsets me that I was ever with a person who could be so... vile. So hateful, unfair and most of all childish. Someone who goes so much against my policy of 'we can talk things out'.
And I am hopeless. I have never had to deal with this sort of thing before. I don't know how to handle it. I don't know how to handle him. I'm sure he wants something from me. I'm sure he wants me to profusely apologise and beg for forgiveness. I am sure of it. Why am I so sure? Because if it was anyone else I would do it. I would fight for a friendship. I would try and talk it through. Had he responded to me the first two times I would have apologised and really meant it. But the more he is like this, the more he shamelessly is online without saying a word, or responding, the more I get angry. The more stubborn I get. The more I never want to speak to him again and have that be a 'Ha, in your damn face, I don't need you or this crap!'. And I am mad at myself for thinking this much about it. For yet again, writing a damn LJ entry about it. I am angry at myself for not moving on. But this is why the ultimatum I gave him is so important. If it weren't for that damn DVD of mine and the book of his. If I don't have my DVD back I'm gonna keep thinking about him having it. If I see that book I'm gonna keep feeling guilty for having it.
And what if he reads this and now knows how to get me and uses it as payback! AAAAAGH!...
Has Ili officially gone paranoid? Just for that I'm not friends locking this post, lol!
I am mightily addicted to this song by Azure Ray
Sleep
Fill these spaces up with days
in my room you can go you can stay
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
Now these years locked in my drawer
I'll open to see just to be sure
And so i'm reaching out for the one
And so i've learned the meaning of the sun
And all this like a message comes to shift my point of view
And watching through my own light
As it tints the shade of you
Hold my wine hold it in
Nobody's lost but nobody wins
And I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
And so i'm reaching out for the one
And so i've learned the meaning of the sun
And all this like a message comes to shift my point of view
And watching through my own light
As it tints the shade of you
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, i cant speak to you, I cant sleep
I cant sleep, I cant speak to you, I cant sleep
It's so gentle and soothing. *sways*
I still have not started my essay.
And Adelaide is just around the corner. I am so happy about it. Honest. No matter how I feel, if I think about being in Adelaide for five days with my friends I feel uber happy and excited. This day cannot come soon enough. And yet I am glad I have something like this to look forward to.
Sometimes I read over what I have written and think... 'You make no fucking sense'.
Ja Ne!