OkCupid Tales #8
Today, I want to talk about all of the throw away messages I get.
Half of them are about two sentences long. The other half are one word (Heeey). They're mostly from people with medium to low match percentages, some from 0% matches. They're all overly familiar, as in, they all sound like we've already met, some jump right into the sex. There is zero investment in any of these.
Please enjoy two dozen examples over three months, under the cut:
December 10: hello how are you doing? wanna meet or chat more thanks (now deleted account)
December 12: Love the nice legs ;)
December 12: Love the tat...how r ya? Great weather huh? Good for indoor activities!!
December 12: Do u need help with math ? I am a math teacher ! (now deleted account)
December 19: Hey how are you (now deleted account)
December 28: Hello there
January 2: Do you think true love exists?
January 7: Hey there Im in barrhaven you? (now deleted account)
January 11: Good Morning (now deleted account)
January 16: Hello ilanykan how are you doing today? How was your weekend? Paul
January 22: Hi how are you
January 30: Hi can I get a full picture? (now deleted account) [Ah, HELL NO?]
February 1: Good afyernoon how are you (now deleted account)
February 13: You have sexy feet
February 14: hi beautiful :)
February 22: hi
February 22: good evening
February 23: Fibonacci number [I don't count this one with the tattoo compliments, because, well, it's clearly a line]
March 4: Hey :) how's it going?
March 5: Hi
March 5: Hey beauty how are you
March 8: Hey how are you doing ?
March 8: humm
March 8: Nice picture:) how are you?
All of these have one thing in common - they're spam. As in, they're contacting as many people as they can in the hopes that one peson will answer. I never answer these. I would like a little more time spent on the introductory message. I usually keep these around for a bit to see if any of these persons turns into someone who needs to be blocked (due to repeated messages).
I am disappointed, however, at the proportion of messages that fall into this category vs the more considered one. I would say this is about 50% of the messages I get, of which these 24 are a sampling. A further 15% could be qualified as "investment spam", meaning they're actually putting some time into their messages, but they're still targetting me because they looked at my profile picture and thought "hey let's give it a shot", sometimes these folk get a response, depends on my mood. Five percent are tattoo compliments, which I usually answer with a thankyou. And about 15% are people with higher match %s, with messages that took some thought and/or time. These folk get answers, two thrids of them jump into sexual innuendo/asking for a full body pic within three messages.
"But, ilanikhan", you say, "That's only 95%, what about the other 5?"
They're the entertainingly cringy ones...
Half of them are about two sentences long. The other half are one word (Heeey). They're mostly from people with medium to low match percentages, some from 0% matches. They're all overly familiar, as in, they all sound like we've already met, some jump right into the sex. There is zero investment in any of these.
Please enjoy two dozen examples over three months, under the cut:
December 10: hello how are you doing? wanna meet or chat more thanks (now deleted account)
December 12: Love the nice legs ;)
December 12: Love the tat...how r ya? Great weather huh? Good for indoor activities!!
December 12: Do u need help with math ? I am a math teacher ! (now deleted account)
December 19: Hey how are you (now deleted account)
December 28: Hello there
January 2: Do you think true love exists?
January 7: Hey there Im in barrhaven you? (now deleted account)
January 11: Good Morning (now deleted account)
January 16: Hello ilanykan how are you doing today? How was your weekend? Paul
January 22: Hi how are you
January 30: Hi can I get a full picture? (now deleted account) [Ah, HELL NO?]
February 1: Good afyernoon how are you (now deleted account)
February 13: You have sexy feet
February 14: hi beautiful :)
February 22: hi
February 22: good evening
February 23: Fibonacci number [I don't count this one with the tattoo compliments, because, well, it's clearly a line]
March 4: Hey :) how's it going?
March 5: Hi
March 5: Hey beauty how are you
March 8: Hey how are you doing ?
March 8: humm
March 8: Nice picture:) how are you?
All of these have one thing in common - they're spam. As in, they're contacting as many people as they can in the hopes that one peson will answer. I never answer these. I would like a little more time spent on the introductory message. I usually keep these around for a bit to see if any of these persons turns into someone who needs to be blocked (due to repeated messages).
I am disappointed, however, at the proportion of messages that fall into this category vs the more considered one. I would say this is about 50% of the messages I get, of which these 24 are a sampling. A further 15% could be qualified as "investment spam", meaning they're actually putting some time into their messages, but they're still targetting me because they looked at my profile picture and thought "hey let's give it a shot", sometimes these folk get a response, depends on my mood. Five percent are tattoo compliments, which I usually answer with a thankyou. And about 15% are people with higher match %s, with messages that took some thought and/or time. These folk get answers, two thrids of them jump into sexual innuendo/asking for a full body pic within three messages.
"But, ilanikhan", you say, "That's only 95%, what about the other 5?"
They're the entertainingly cringy ones...