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[ihavesmallboobs]

i havent written about my life in a while. partly because 'it' is starting again. i dont know what to do. my friends always try to help. it goes away, and then comes back. i dont want to be like that but i cant help it. it happens every month. it wont even let me go 4 weeks straight. i dont do anything to make it come.it just does. my mom tried to

Comments

[deathferns]

Nat... I know that sometimes sympathy feels like crap when it comes to these kinds of things, but lots of people have no idea what you're going through. Trust me when I say I have been there, and I visit that pit of despair almost everyday. It just seems to creep up on you and bite you in the ass, so to speak. It swallows you whole, and you can't get out, even when you plaster that fake smile onto your face. People don't look into your eyes and notice the deep pain residing in them, and life goes on as it should. But you need to talk to somebody about it. Or if not, write. Writing has always helped me out...ever since the shit that started happening at Meadow Oaks. 2nd grade. People started turning away from me, making me the loser and the outcast, and I got darker. I wrote to save myself. That was before I took stupider, more "drastic" measures. I just hope you won't go as out of control as I did. Promise me you won't, because you are a beautiful person, inside & out, and all this pain can do you in. It's not a phase, this is life. Unfortunately for you & me, we are realists, and we see the darker sides of everything. If you need someone to talk to, I'm always here, and I want you to know that. I do know how you feel. I have been there. I love you lots.