Malignancy of mind
How does a powerful tool like mind turns malignant? How does the mind cause us suffering? These are important questions to look at, for any possibility of freedom and love. Why is the mind destined to make us suffer? Lets look at few properties of the mind or "self".
1. Mind abstracts reality
In order to form an idea about our surroundings, mind must reduce it into a concept, a label. This abstraction must always be positive or negative (no matter how subtle it is). This is because if its not desirable or painful, the mind will not be interested since no further actions are required. For example, you see a beautiful boy in the street. To make future reference to this boy, your mind gives him a label "cute boy" so that you can easily recall his face. When that happens, your connection to reality is lost because it is no longer needed. On first encounter, you will need to see his face to obtain a sort of euphoria. Subsequently, this euphoria can be obtained by merely conjuring the idea of "cute boy".
2. The abstraction always have a positive or negative value
A tool is always a means to an end. Therefore, abstraction is not required unless there is something you desire or u wanna avoid. Thus, when abstraction gains an emotive value, thoughts become INSEPARABLE from feelings. Abstraction (which is any mental process), therefore projects you into a future state (if you desire), or a past state (if you fear). Thus, your reality will be shifted away from the present into the conceptual realm of past and future.
3. Thought-feelings are self perpetuating
When you mistake your life-experience as yourself, thought-feelings become self-perpetuating. Since thought-feelings always look forward to the future or nostalgic about the past, it cannot achieve resolution. Look at this closely;
Desire - Pleasure - Fear - Pain - Desire is one INSEPARABLE cycle of a thought-feeling.
Once you desire something (say a boy), you go for it (chase him). You obtain pleasure from it either by fantasizing or actually succeeded into gaining it (had sex with him). Once you are used to the pleasure (become attached), you will fear losing it (his affection or commitment), or fear it can no longer give you the same level of pleasure(get tired of him). Finally, when the pleasure is gone, you feel the pain of loss (pain of being unwanted or the emptiness of being alone). In order to avoid this pain, you are forced to desire something else (another boy) to distract you again. So on and so forth.
4. The self perpetuation of thought-feelings takes on a groove (or become a script)
The above process is the fundamental building block of normal human experiences. When we identify through our experiences, we give this process a tremendous momentum of its own. This is because the sense of "self" defined by experience is very VULNERABLE. For instance, if you win a competition at chess, you see yourself as a chess expert. This sense of self is fragile because it is easily stripped if someone wins you at chess. Thus, if you identify strongly as being a chess expert, you will suffer much to maintain this self definition by winning many titles and fearing to lose. Similarly, if your "life story" is of one of misery, of being betrayed by the ones you love, you will unconsciously perpetuate this story by loving those who will hurt you. Because their unavailability, their aloofness, their emotional volatility is very attractive to you. Hence, everyone needs to feel special for this reason. The sense of self or ego wants to keep expanding by hoarding more experience that agrees with him or her. Because this sense of self (defined by experiences) is false...
I will take about how this groove causes almost ALL of our suffering in my next post.
1. Mind abstracts reality
In order to form an idea about our surroundings, mind must reduce it into a concept, a label. This abstraction must always be positive or negative (no matter how subtle it is). This is because if its not desirable or painful, the mind will not be interested since no further actions are required. For example, you see a beautiful boy in the street. To make future reference to this boy, your mind gives him a label "cute boy" so that you can easily recall his face. When that happens, your connection to reality is lost because it is no longer needed. On first encounter, you will need to see his face to obtain a sort of euphoria. Subsequently, this euphoria can be obtained by merely conjuring the idea of "cute boy".
2. The abstraction always have a positive or negative value
A tool is always a means to an end. Therefore, abstraction is not required unless there is something you desire or u wanna avoid. Thus, when abstraction gains an emotive value, thoughts become INSEPARABLE from feelings. Abstraction (which is any mental process), therefore projects you into a future state (if you desire), or a past state (if you fear). Thus, your reality will be shifted away from the present into the conceptual realm of past and future.
3. Thought-feelings are self perpetuating
When you mistake your life-experience as yourself, thought-feelings become self-perpetuating. Since thought-feelings always look forward to the future or nostalgic about the past, it cannot achieve resolution. Look at this closely;
Desire - Pleasure - Fear - Pain - Desire is one INSEPARABLE cycle of a thought-feeling.
Once you desire something (say a boy), you go for it (chase him). You obtain pleasure from it either by fantasizing or actually succeeded into gaining it (had sex with him). Once you are used to the pleasure (become attached), you will fear losing it (his affection or commitment), or fear it can no longer give you the same level of pleasure(get tired of him). Finally, when the pleasure is gone, you feel the pain of loss (pain of being unwanted or the emptiness of being alone). In order to avoid this pain, you are forced to desire something else (another boy) to distract you again. So on and so forth.
4. The self perpetuation of thought-feelings takes on a groove (or become a script)
The above process is the fundamental building block of normal human experiences. When we identify through our experiences, we give this process a tremendous momentum of its own. This is because the sense of "self" defined by experience is very VULNERABLE. For instance, if you win a competition at chess, you see yourself as a chess expert. This sense of self is fragile because it is easily stripped if someone wins you at chess. Thus, if you identify strongly as being a chess expert, you will suffer much to maintain this self definition by winning many titles and fearing to lose. Similarly, if your "life story" is of one of misery, of being betrayed by the ones you love, you will unconsciously perpetuate this story by loving those who will hurt you. Because their unavailability, their aloofness, their emotional volatility is very attractive to you. Hence, everyone needs to feel special for this reason. The sense of self or ego wants to keep expanding by hoarding more experience that agrees with him or her. Because this sense of self (defined by experiences) is false...
I will take about how this groove causes almost ALL of our suffering in my next post.