(no subject)
now that i'm thinking of richard siken.
a few months ago i was living in this apartment with this boy i'm in love with, and that was the time he was in love with me back, and i'd waited years to hear it, and when i did, i pretended not to be horrified.
instead was i wrote out this poem, snow and dirty rain, it's called, and it was three pages all written out and i tacked it to the wall in the living room and i hoped he would read it.
I was away, I don't know where, lying on the floor,
pretending I was dead. I wanted to hurt you
but the victory is that I could not stomach it. We have
swallowed him up, they said It's beautiful, it really is.
I had a dream about you. We were in the gold room
where everyone finally gets what they want.
You said Tell me about your books, your visions made
of flesh and light and I said This is the Moon. This is
the Sun. Let me name the stars for you. Let me take you
there. The splash of my tongue melting you like a sugar
cube...We were in the gold room where everyone
finally gets what they want, so I said What do you
want, sweetheart? and you said Kiss me. Here I am
leaving you clues. I am singing now while Rome
burns. We are all just trying to be holy. My applejack,
my silent night, just mash your lips against me.
We are all going forward. None of us are going back.
he never did read it, though. i moved back home seven months later.
a few months ago i was living in this apartment with this boy i'm in love with, and that was the time he was in love with me back, and i'd waited years to hear it, and when i did, i pretended not to be horrified.
instead was i wrote out this poem, snow and dirty rain, it's called, and it was three pages all written out and i tacked it to the wall in the living room and i hoped he would read it.
I was away, I don't know where, lying on the floor,
pretending I was dead. I wanted to hurt you
but the victory is that I could not stomach it. We have
swallowed him up, they said It's beautiful, it really is.
I had a dream about you. We were in the gold room
where everyone finally gets what they want.
You said Tell me about your books, your visions made
of flesh and light and I said This is the Moon. This is
the Sun. Let me name the stars for you. Let me take you
there. The splash of my tongue melting you like a sugar
cube...We were in the gold room where everyone
finally gets what they want, so I said What do you
want, sweetheart? and you said Kiss me. Here I am
leaving you clues. I am singing now while Rome
burns. We are all just trying to be holy. My applejack,
my silent night, just mash your lips against me.
We are all going forward. None of us are going back.
he never did read it, though. i moved back home seven months later.