Please don't fall on me big, sleepy, itchy, bloated Christian...
Re: The subject of my post, please be patient and stay tuned
A series of events that took place on the night of November 14th, 2007 on the 2nd floor of Zumberge library after I found out that my research paper was actually due on November 19th, and NOT the 26th, as I originally thought:
- Walked up to computer hub, and noticed an overweight disheveled man staring me down
- Waved hello to Jen Rodriguez
- Immediately found an open computer (this rarely happens nowadays)
- Got up from the aforementioned computer to call Jenny to e-mail me some documents
- When I got back, the fat man had relocated to the computer next to me
- Noticed he was NOT a GVSU student via a small piece of paper that said "GVSU GUEST LOG IN" followed by a series of letters and numbers
- Not joking, his lower lip was very large and extended a good 2 inches in front of his upper lip (I know this isn't an event. I don't care, it's my journal, I can do what I want.)
- Worried that the horrible stench of my feet could be detected by those around me
- Noticed his large stack of library owned cds which included (but not limited to) The Best of Chicago, The Best of Kansas and Alan Jackson
- Noticed his large tin of cigarette tobacco one minute, looked away, then noticed how it had disappeared
- Noticed that he was typing musings about the Bible in size 25 pt. font
- Large man began to fall asleep
- Watched as the large man swayed back and forth in his chair, still sleeping
- Kept working on my homework, even when, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed the large man was asleep and slowly falling towards me
- Thought to myself "Please don't fall on me!"
- Was startled every time he suddenly awoke from his slumber, rubbed his face in a vain attempt to further wake himself up, and then proceeded to scratch himself everywhere as if he had a rash that covered his entire body
- Became increasingly alarmed/nervous when the large man put both hands under the desk and under his rotund belly and "rearranged" various objects on his person
- Looked nervously to the boy sitting across from me as the large man fell asleep once again and proceeded to become flatulent, to which the boy responded with a shrug
- Proceeded to laugh at myself as the large man slammed his head on his keyboard, invariably landing on his "Enter" key, making Microsoft Word repeatedly go the next line in his document. This was punctuated by the obnoxious beeping sound after depressing a keyboard key for too long of a period.
-The End
A series of events that took place on the night of November 14th, 2007 on the 2nd floor of Zumberge library after I found out that my research paper was actually due on November 19th, and NOT the 26th, as I originally thought:
- Walked up to computer hub, and noticed an overweight disheveled man staring me down
- Waved hello to Jen Rodriguez
- Immediately found an open computer (this rarely happens nowadays)
- Got up from the aforementioned computer to call Jenny to e-mail me some documents
- When I got back, the fat man had relocated to the computer next to me
- Noticed he was NOT a GVSU student via a small piece of paper that said "GVSU GUEST LOG IN" followed by a series of letters and numbers
- Not joking, his lower lip was very large and extended a good 2 inches in front of his upper lip (I know this isn't an event. I don't care, it's my journal, I can do what I want.)
- Worried that the horrible stench of my feet could be detected by those around me
- Noticed his large stack of library owned cds which included (but not limited to) The Best of Chicago, The Best of Kansas and Alan Jackson
- Noticed his large tin of cigarette tobacco one minute, looked away, then noticed how it had disappeared
- Noticed that he was typing musings about the Bible in size 25 pt. font
- Large man began to fall asleep
- Watched as the large man swayed back and forth in his chair, still sleeping
- Kept working on my homework, even when, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed the large man was asleep and slowly falling towards me
- Thought to myself "Please don't fall on me!"
- Was startled every time he suddenly awoke from his slumber, rubbed his face in a vain attempt to further wake himself up, and then proceeded to scratch himself everywhere as if he had a rash that covered his entire body
- Became increasingly alarmed/nervous when the large man put both hands under the desk and under his rotund belly and "rearranged" various objects on his person
- Looked nervously to the boy sitting across from me as the large man fell asleep once again and proceeded to become flatulent, to which the boy responded with a shrug
- Proceeded to laugh at myself as the large man slammed his head on his keyboard, invariably landing on his "Enter" key, making Microsoft Word repeatedly go the next line in his document. This was punctuated by the obnoxious beeping sound after depressing a keyboard key for too long of a period.
-The End