I think you have a social phobia. I understand that problem well (not yours 100%).
I think you should take it at your own pace. Instead of trying to run away from it, I think you should try to "face" it, but at your own pace. Not the perceived "perfected" pace.
And your parents seem to be over demanding and scrutinizing. My parents were like that. Maybe that causes social phobia? Or slow development?
Yea you are alone, and when you are alone, I believe your problems magnify putting you in a delusional state. It's not crazy, it's a perfectly plausible outcome.
Do you have a family member you can talk to? You should find someone to talk to, where you won't be afraid to talk about yourself (i.e. how low self esteem you have and what you think about yourself). Most people would suggest a therapist, but to me they never helped. I've had to figure everything out myself, and that's the real way it works I suppose.
I was almost exactly like you, afraid of people and avoiding, unable to communicate well. I became a shut-in... there's a popular term in the wiki encyclopedia about it, and is a common issue in people especially in Japan. Like I said, I believe the important thing is to ignore what everyone else expects of you and go at your OWN PACE. If you think you can't then don't. I think what you need is a helping hand to give you a little shove to get you started. Sometimes we all need help.
I'll try to help as best I can but sometimes help from internet only goes so far...
I think you should take it at your own pace. Instead of trying to run away from it, I think you should try to "face" it, but at your own pace. Not the perceived "perfected" pace.
And your parents seem to be over demanding and scrutinizing. My parents were like that. Maybe that causes social phobia? Or slow development?
Yea you are alone, and when you are alone, I believe your problems magnify putting you in a delusional state. It's not crazy, it's a perfectly plausible outcome.
Do you have a family member you can talk to? You should find someone to talk to, where you won't be afraid to talk about yourself (i.e. how low self esteem you have and what you think about yourself).
Most people would suggest a therapist, but to me they never helped. I've had to figure everything out myself, and that's the real way it works I suppose.
I was almost exactly like you, afraid of people and avoiding, unable to communicate well. I became a shut-in... there's a popular term in the wiki encyclopedia about it, and is a common issue in people especially in Japan.
Like I said, I believe the important thing is to ignore what everyone else expects of you and go at your OWN PACE. If you think you can't then don't. I think what you need is a helping hand to give you a little shove to get you started. Sometimes we all need help.
I'll try to help as best I can but sometimes help from internet only goes so far...
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