Of Life and Love
If you were wondering… the answer is yes.
I knew I was dating a vampire. It wasn’t figurative either. He was a full fledged, blood sucking creature of the night. The type that you read about in books or see in movies and television shows. If anyone found out, they would probably tell me to get away as fast as possible. There was only one problem.
I couldn’t resist him.
And it wasn’t that he mind controlled me into doing so either. If he had done so, he probably would have killed me already. It just had no effect over me. He even found that difficult to accept. It was a first.
Our meeting started with a stare down at a bar. From there, a simple greeting, a simple handshake, a normal name, normal appearance, but a secret and deadly lifestyle. I left the bar with him that night and we got to know each other. Sakurai Sho was his name. He was a handsome, distinguished looking young man. When you talked to him, his words were well constructed and influencing. When you looked at him, your eyes were drawn to his, like two magnets. What struck me as odd when I first met him, were his eyes. They were a melted golden color. I was easily lost in them. His lips were the next thing that attracted me. When he spoke, I imagined how soft they would be if we kissed. Then his neck. I wondered what it would be like to nuzzle myself into it while laying soft kisses on it.
It was dangerous for me to be thinking about those things on the first night I ever laid eyes on him. He was attractive. I was the bug getting closer to the deadly light. There was something to say about that night. It was the start of many different beginnings.
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
He didn’t come home with me and I didn’t go home with him that night. We didn’t sleep with each other. It was just a normal, shallow meeting between two strangers. I doubted that I’d ever see him again as well. You usually only meet people one time at a bar, maybe talk to them a little and get to know them, but you are only passing through the other person’s life for a short amount of time. More often than not, you forget about whoever you talked to that night the next day. But sometimes, they can leave an enormous impact on you.
The next night I went back to the bar because a friend had asked me to. And there he was. Sakurai Sho was sitting on a bar stool, staring intently at me from across the room. He had a drink in his right hand; the other laying on his lap. I left my friend to do what he wanted and walked to where the man was. There was this force between us, pulling me towards him. It was as if gravity wanted to bring us together. I stopped in front of him and leaned over the bar. The only word that was spoken was “Hi.” He didn’t seem to recognize me at first and then as I ordered a drink, my name came to him.
“You are Ohno Satoshi, aren’t you? We met last night,” he said.
“I’m surprised you remember me,” I replied. “Sakurai Sho, right?”
“And I’m surprised you remember me as well. Why don’t we have a drink and talk some more?”
I nodded, gave my money to the bar tender and walked off, drink in hand with the man I met last night. We talked all night at the bar. Our conversation went on until the bar closed at 2 in the morning. After hours, he said, “Come with me.” I followed him. I trusted him after all the hours we had spent talking over the two nights. He grabbed my hand and led me away. The coldness of his hand spread fear into my mind. The hair on the back of my neck and all up my arm stood on end but nothing was saying “Stop. Don’t do this.”
That was the night we slept together. It was agreed that it would be a one-night stand with no feelings attached. I was lucky. I can detach myself from anything. But to detach myself from someone who disappears when you wake up the next morning was difficult for me. I again counted on the fact that I’d never see him again.
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
I didn’t go back to the bar for a week. Not only was I busy, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to see him again. But when I slept, I’d see him in my dreams and anywhere I walked at night, I’d see visions of him out of the corner of my eye. He was always on my mind.
When I finally went back to the bar, I didn’t see him. I sat in his seat at the bar, ordered a couple of heavy drinks and left. The cool temperature outside was the only thing keeping me from passing out as I walked back home. That was the next time I saw him. He was unmistakably leaning against a light post, looking at me as I got closer to him.
“You know, you make it very hard for me,” he said as I walked past. I was too drunk to care.
“Yeah well, you make it hard for me too,” I slurred trying to continue my walk. He got in front of me, hands on my shoulders and stared into my eyes.
“What are you?”
“A human being, like you.” I was un-amused.
“Let me in your mind,” he demanded.
“What? Look, just get off of me. I want to go home. You’re annoying now. You aren’t cute anymore.”
“You thought I was cute? I never met someone like you.” He wrapped a hand on the back of my head and forced our foreheads together.
“What are you doing to me?” I was annoyed now. I wanted to go home and melt into my bed. He was blocking my path.
“It’s what I can’t do that’s so intriguing. I can’t see into your mind.”
“Freak.” I felt sick and pushed him away. I leaned over to the side and threw up. He rubbed my back and escorted me back to my house despite telling him I didn’t want his help. However, I wasn’t in the best condition to not accept it. I lowered myself with his support into my bed and rolled over on my side. Who knows how much I threw up on the way home.
“What are you still here for?” I was grumpy. I wasn’t mad, I was just fed up that of all the times to show up, he comes when I’m drunk and sick.
“Because I can’t forget you.”
“Didn’t we agree that it was a one night type of deal? No feelings involved?”
“Yes.”
“I would have thought that you of all people would be good at forgetting.”
“Usually, I am. Admit it, though. You went back there tonight looking for me.”
“I wasn’t looking for you. I went for a drink. Happy?” I sighed and folded my arms best I could and closed my eyes. My stomach churned and I felt acid coming up.
“You’re a terrible liar,” he purred into my ear. Shivers were sent down my spine. His lips were just centimeters away from the hairs on my ear. I had to force the acid reflux back down my throat, stinging as it went down. “I’ll meet you here tomorrow night. I have to tell you something.” And with that he disappeared and I fell asleep.
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
I called out sick from work. I was still feeling miserable from last night and I knew that work wouldn’t do me any good. What would he need to talk to me about? I was still a stranger to him even though we had sex. There wasn’t anything remotely interesting about me, so why was he still talking to me?
5 ‘o clock rolled around and the sun was setting. Why was it always at night that he came to meet me? He was definitely one of the more stranger people I’d ever met. I was lazily sitting on my couch in the living room, flipping through television channels, bored out of my mind waiting for the guy when a knock came from the front door. I held my head as I walked to keep myself from getting any dizzier than I already was. I opened the door and met his golden eyes. Welcoming him in, I gave him a cup of tea and sat down at the table next to him.
“You look better tonight,” he complimented.
“Yeah, but I still feel like crap. What is it that you want to talk about?”
He pushed the cup that was in front of him off to the side and leaned forward. “I can’t stand you.”
“That’s very nice!” I sarcastically exclaimed.
“You don’t get it. I can’t stand you because I don’t understand you.”
“What’s there not to get? I’m a normal human being with flaws. I’m nothing special.”
“My powers don’t work on you and you are all I think about. What frustrates me the most is that I can’t explain why.”
‘Creeper,’ I thought.
“I don’t even know you and to hear you say that I’m all you think about is insane! I don’t want to know you! Leave!” I shouted.
“Hear me out.”
No, I didn’t want to hear the rest of what he had to say. My patience was thin, my head was starting to hurt more than it already was and yet I couldn’t bring myself to tell him a second time to get out. I huffed and crossed my arms.
“Who or what the hell are you?” I squinted at him.
His eyes shifted and he leaned in closer. “I’m something that should never exist. I’m an accident-“
“Don’t say something like that. You exist for a reason and-“
“What I am is something that shouldn’t exist…” He raised his head and showed me his mouth. Two sharp incisor teeth shone in the light. I reacted to it by pushing myself and the chair back. Frozen and unable to move, I stared at the pointed fangs.
“I see,” I said.
“I should be able to read your mind, but I can’t.”
I just sat there. I was thinking that within the next few minutes I was probably going to die. I didn’t have anyone, I didn’t like my job… It would be better for him to just kill me…but I didn’t want to die.
“I should stay away but it’s impossible. By interacting with you, I’m leading you down a dark path that no one should walk.” He inched his way closer to me and I tensed up more and more. “I am a vampire. I should kill you right now and yet I can’t. Explain it to me,” he snarled.
How would he want me to explain it? I didn’t know why he wouldn’t drain me, kill me, dispose of me…
“Because you’re intrigued. You can not read my mind or figure out why I attract you in this way. It bothers you.”
“If I kill you I won’t have to worry about why,” he threatened.
He seemed pretty reasonable… at least when he was calm he was. I raised a hand shielding my face and head. “If you do, then you have to live with the fact that you killed someone who cares about you,” I managed to say.
“I never had someone care about me, what makes you special?”
I lowered my arm and looked at him. He looked sad and in pain. Just by reading his facial expressions and looking into his eyes, I could tell that he had someone before. Someone he said “I love you” to who betrayed him in the end. It would explain having the one night stands without attachment.
“Because we’re the same,” I said. I brought myself back to my senses and looked at, not the supposed monster, but the man sitting beside me. “We’ve been betrayed by those we love, those we spend every moment for, only to have them rip everything out from under us. It doesn’t matter what kind of person you are. It hurts everyone.” I watched his face change and soften to an expression that only had sadness. “You aren’t the only one to feel it, you know? You can’t kill me because maybe… you’ve fallen in love. You can’t stand me because you don’t want those feeling again and I bring them up.”
“Are you sure that you are ‘only human’?” he questioned.
“Every bit of me.”
“I never met someone like you. I also don’t understand why you aren’t afraid of me.”
I was afraid. I was terrified but upon hearing that he has a conscious and wouldn’t do something rash, it allowed me to calm down. “You are just as confused as any of us humans. What difference does it make if you are a…vampire.” I hesitated. “The only difference I can see is that you have a different diet and from all the stories I’ve heard on vampirism, you live forever.”
“You truly are a different type of person, Ohno Satoshi.”
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
The night he said he was a ‘vampire,’ I was just playing with the word. I didn’t buy into it until he truly proved it to me. It shocked me, maybe even frightened me a little, but that didn’t keep me from seeing him, strangely enough. He was right about the dark path though. One instance was he took me to a vampire bar a couple of miles away from where I lived (because I wanted him to) and I was stared at the entire time. It was unnerving being stared at as if I was going to be someone’s dinner. He told me the only reason no one jumped and attacked me was because I ‘belonged’ to him. And vampires never take another vampire’s human. I was a belonging in the vampire world. It was amazing at just how many there were.
Another was when we walked home together one night and were stopped by two male vampires. They were definitely something to worry about. They were bigger than both me and Sho and they looked stronger than both of us combined: and that was saying something.
“He is mine,” Sho growled. He put himself between me and the other vamps. You had to be on your guard for any other vampires that tried to take your ‘property.’ I just went along with it because he had to stake his claim with other vamps but when we were alone, I was never treated as a thing.
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
Sho was secretive. He never asked about those ‘things you never talk about’ and so I never felt the need to bring it up. But when I asked him about where he gets his blood from or why he won’t bite me, he changes the subject or he ignores it completely. I probably shouldn’t know anyway. It was better this way. Because of this, it took a while for us to commit to each other and finally say “I want to be with you.” 3 months, exactly. But that didn’t stop us from having sex. Our love making was great by my standards. I didn’t know how it was for him. And it was perfect now! I finally found a way to keep him from leaving me when the sun came up. I reconstructed my home to be light free so I wouldn’t keep waking up to an empty space. We could do it morning, noon and night, if we wanted!
There was one particular night when we were sleeping together (after we had started our relationship) that would remain with me. He held my left hand with his right and caressed my face and neck with the other as he thrusted into me. I wrapped my free arm around his back and dug my finger nails into him. It was painful for me, but at the same time it felt so pleasurable. I was always on the receiving end and I enjoyed it for the most part. After the sex was over, I couldn’t fall asleep. I rolled over to see the vampire sleeping next to me. He didn’t need to breathe but he would make his chest rise and fall to make me feel better. He didn’t have to do a lot of things for me. Just seeing him was enough. I moved a piece of hair from his closed eye and made him stir.
“Hello,” he sleepily said.
“Hi.”
He breathed into the pillow before repositioning himself to face me. “Can’t sleep?”
“I’m thinking too much.”
“Anything I can help with?”
I sighed. “I want answers, Sho. Why won’t you bite me?” It wasn’t like I wanted to be bitten. I just wanted to know why he wouldn’t. His fangs would always come out during sex and whenever he kissed my neck I always wondered if he would bite, but he never does.
“You want to know, huh?” He waited a second, keeping me on edge for his answer. I had the feeling that he was going to avoid my question again but he said, “I won’t because I’m afraid. I’m afraid of changing you.”
“I guess it would be a common fear for a vampire.”
“Only for those who are sensible. Some don’t care.” The atmosphere got heavy. I didn’t know what to say and it seemed like he didn’t want to talk. I played with my fingers out of frustration. “It’s only for forever. Which is why I won’t do it.”
“That doesn’t seem long at all, if you have someone to share it with…”
He smirked. “I don’t move the stars for anyone.”
“And I can’t live within you forever.”
“Touché.” He caressed my hand. “It appears we’ve reached an impasse. You probably want to be a vampire. That’s what every human wants.”
“And you probably want me to kill you. That’s what all the sensible vampires want.” How did it even cross my mind? If he wanted to die, I don’t think I’d be able to do it. “Why don’t you let me decide my fate?”
“Because I didn’t decide mine. Who said I wanted this?” He sighed, breathlessly.
“You did. You never once told me that you tried to kill yourself after becoming a vampire. You could have ended your life but you haven’t. You are existing because of someone or something. Were you looking for love? Were you looking for a savior? A supporter? Revenge?”
“I got my revenge. And it’s true… I never did try to kill myself. I’m only a 30 year old vampire. I haven’t quite experienced that feeling of not being able to live without something until this moment. Ohno Satoshi, you are something I can’t live without.”
“Don’t just say that because we’re together. We will both be hurt in the end,” I said. I didn’t believe in finding something that I couldn’t live without. Everyone moves on eventually; just enjoy what you have, when you have it.
“I finally find someone who is both a lover and a savior and he’s rejecting me, just great.” He was trying to make me guilty.
“Stop playing the guilt card. I’m not rejecting you.”
“Then I’ll give you a choice.”
“Bending the cosmos a little, aren’t we, hypocrite.” I teased.
“I will change you, only if you are ready to live for eternity. You know everything about being a vampire, so I have no doubt that you’ll be alright if you decide to go through with it.”
Was it possible to live a normal life if you could only come out at night? Was it possible to eat a normal meal while your main nutrition was blood, night after night? According to him, if vampires came out during the sunlight hours, they’d burn to death. Also according to him, vampires can eat everything, but they can’t taste anything, except for the crimson liquid that flows through every human body.
“Give me time to think about it.”
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
I stayed at the bar the entire next day. I downed a couple of drinks. How did I come to be where I was? At least 4 months ago, I was denying the vampire and here I am now… giving him my everything. I tilted the glass with the few ice cubes and smiled. Who knew that I’d fall in love with a vampire of all things…
“Hey… you doin’ alright?” the bartender asked me.
“Eh… I’m okay…”
“What’s got you beat?”
“Old man… if you love someone… would you be willing to give up everything for them?”
“Ah~ Problems with love, huh? My wife… See her right here?” He took down one of the pictures from the wall behind him. He handed it to me and pointed out an older woman. “She came from a high class family with loads of money. Me? I’m just a middle class worker. We met in college. She always told me that she fell for my personality and my tight ass,” he laughed. I couldn’t help but give a smirk for his last comment. “Anyway, she was the heir to her family’s business because she was an only child. When she met me, she said she would give it all up to marry for love. And that’s just what happened. Parents weren’t too happy, but who would be when your only heir runs off with someone like me. Point is: you have to do what you think you should. If you love someone with your whole being, what’s to stop you from being happy?”
That bartender’s words stayed with me from that day on. They also helped me make my decision.
When I talked to Sho later that night, he seemed shocked that I’d taken such little time to think about a major life decision. When I told him the story of the bartender, he lightened up and agreed.
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
“You might have to lie down for this,” Sho said. “I’ve heard of people becoming light headed and passing out.”
“Will it hurt?”
“I can’t guarantee it will be pleasurable.”
He lowered me down into my bed. I’d seen him be sensual before but this was a different kind. It was a different kind of gratitude… a different kind of passion and sensitivity… It was so gentle that it made me sad.
“Sho, it’s my choice…” I reminded him.
“I know.” He leaned forward to kiss me. His fangs out, shining in the pale light. I felt like I was going to be stripped of dirty clothes and then get placed into marvelous ones… but at the price of my humanity. I tensed up when he moved towards my neck.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be with you.” He kissed my neck then slowly sunk his teeth in.
The pain was long and intense. My entire body felt like it had fire running through it. My brain wanted to explode. My heart rushed as if I’d run a mile while sprinting. I tightly closed my eyes hoping it would be over soon. My hands gripped what they could. My back arched and I writhed with pain. Then it was over… I was cold. The flaming sensation disappeared and my body was calmed. When I opened my eyes to my new life, the first thing I saw was Sho’s face. Seeing the beautiful sight, I reassured myself I was going to be fine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
OOC: So this started off as something I thought of at work. I wrote it down and then typed it up when I got home. Turned out to be something I REALLY liked after everything was said and done, lol. Hardest part was choosing a pairing >__< I've decided that I cannot stay away from Vampire Sho. Burikaesu is to blame for that. *sucker for golden eyes <3*
Anyway, I think what separated this from usual vampire stories is that Sho is a rather young vampire. You know how in all the other ones, the vampire is usually hundreds or centuries old? Well... not Sho XD And that kinda changes things a bit. OKAY enough notes. I manipulated a picture to show what Ohno would look like after he's changed and I came up with this!: PICTURE! Sho has golden eyes like in Burikaesu and Ohno has like... teal-ish colored. I like my vampires with colored eyes~ ^~^
