On religion and feminism
It occurs to me that this is not as obvious as I would have thought:
It is condescending and ignorant to assume that what is best for any woman is to not be a member of a patriarchical religion.
Religion is important to a lot of people, and being a member of a religion only means that your worldview is shaped in some part by this religion, and that it is very likely you believe in a certain god or gods. It does suggest your values, but it is ignorant to assume that all members of a certain religion believe certain socio-political "truths."
My being a Catholic does not necessarily mean that I think a wife's duty is to submit to her husband or that I am in favor of only men being priests or holding higher-level positions within my religion. My being a Catholic does not mean that I am against birth control. It doesn't even mean that I am pro-life. It doesn't mean that I vote Democratic. It doesn't mean that I plan on having as many kids as possible. It doesn't mean I drink a lot, or even at all. It doesn't mean that I am against pre-marital sex, against same-sex marriage or against divorce. It doesn't even mean that I believe in papal infallability. (Which of these being Catholic means I "should" do/believe or not is another matter, but you don't know which of these I actually do/believe just by knowing what religious group I identify with.) It does mean that I probably believe in God, but there are also people who call themselves agnostic Catholics. Or call themselves Catholic and go to church every Sunday yet haven't an ounce of faith.
Since I grew up Catholic, it does mean that I started out in a culture that had certain values, but the same can be said of me growing up in middle-class suburban southwestern PA. But no one would suggest that just because women are not really 100% equal in the United States that what is best for me would be to leave the States. Or at least, not as many people as seem to suggest that being a member of X religion is fundamentally bad for all women who are members of it.
Yet, it seems that some feel that by believing in God the way that I do, in the structure that I do, it means that I am oppressing myself, or at the very least, allowing myself to be oppressed. They seem to feel that I should remove an important part of my life for the sake of my autonomy as a woman.
But as an autonomous human being? I've got the right to believe in what I want to believe in. What I *do* believe in.
I don't think that being Catholic hurts me, no more than being an American does. I also think that in a different society, where Catholicism has a lot more influence over society and law, my answer could very well be different (or I could point out that just because the overarching culture is hurting me as a woman, it doesn't mean that the religious aspect of it is hurting me. Or I could believe that Catholicism makes it hard to be a woman, but that it's worth it for my beliefs. Or... etc, etc) And while there are parts of the Catholic structure I would like to see changed? It doesn't mean the solution is to leave the church. For some, that might be the solution, but you know what? I get to decide what's right for me.
It's fine to criticize patriarchy in religion. It's fine to look at something and say "That's oppression!" in religion or out of it. Where you cross the line is suggesting that I can't see that, and that you know what's best for me. If I'm making a mistake, it's mine to make. If I'm doing what works for me? Let me do it.
That goes for any woman -- any person, even! -- who is a member of a religious group, or who isn't. I trust you to evaluate your religious beliefs, and you should trust me to evaluate mine. I, too, am an autonomous, thinking human being.
. . .
This post sparked by a snippet of conversation that I overheard, and while I'm unsure what the whole of the conversation was, the snippet reminded me of other conversations I've heard or had, and all of that together made me put this up.
It is condescending and ignorant to assume that what is best for any woman is to not be a member of a patriarchical religion.
Religion is important to a lot of people, and being a member of a religion only means that your worldview is shaped in some part by this religion, and that it is very likely you believe in a certain god or gods. It does suggest your values, but it is ignorant to assume that all members of a certain religion believe certain socio-political "truths."
My being a Catholic does not necessarily mean that I think a wife's duty is to submit to her husband or that I am in favor of only men being priests or holding higher-level positions within my religion. My being a Catholic does not mean that I am against birth control. It doesn't even mean that I am pro-life. It doesn't mean that I vote Democratic. It doesn't mean that I plan on having as many kids as possible. It doesn't mean I drink a lot, or even at all. It doesn't mean that I am against pre-marital sex, against same-sex marriage or against divorce. It doesn't even mean that I believe in papal infallability. (Which of these being Catholic means I "should" do/believe or not is another matter, but you don't know which of these I actually do/believe just by knowing what religious group I identify with.) It does mean that I probably believe in God, but there are also people who call themselves agnostic Catholics. Or call themselves Catholic and go to church every Sunday yet haven't an ounce of faith.
Since I grew up Catholic, it does mean that I started out in a culture that had certain values, but the same can be said of me growing up in middle-class suburban southwestern PA. But no one would suggest that just because women are not really 100% equal in the United States that what is best for me would be to leave the States. Or at least, not as many people as seem to suggest that being a member of X religion is fundamentally bad for all women who are members of it.
Yet, it seems that some feel that by believing in God the way that I do, in the structure that I do, it means that I am oppressing myself, or at the very least, allowing myself to be oppressed. They seem to feel that I should remove an important part of my life for the sake of my autonomy as a woman.
But as an autonomous human being? I've got the right to believe in what I want to believe in. What I *do* believe in.
I don't think that being Catholic hurts me, no more than being an American does. I also think that in a different society, where Catholicism has a lot more influence over society and law, my answer could very well be different (or I could point out that just because the overarching culture is hurting me as a woman, it doesn't mean that the religious aspect of it is hurting me. Or I could believe that Catholicism makes it hard to be a woman, but that it's worth it for my beliefs. Or... etc, etc) And while there are parts of the Catholic structure I would like to see changed? It doesn't mean the solution is to leave the church. For some, that might be the solution, but you know what? I get to decide what's right for me.
It's fine to criticize patriarchy in religion. It's fine to look at something and say "That's oppression!" in religion or out of it. Where you cross the line is suggesting that I can't see that, and that you know what's best for me. If I'm making a mistake, it's mine to make. If I'm doing what works for me? Let me do it.
That goes for any woman -- any person, even! -- who is a member of a religious group, or who isn't. I trust you to evaluate your religious beliefs, and you should trust me to evaluate mine. I, too, am an autonomous, thinking human being.
. . .
This post sparked by a snippet of conversation that I overheard, and while I'm unsure what the whole of the conversation was, the snippet reminded me of other conversations I've heard or had, and all of that together made me put this up.