[Completed] One More Chance - Epilogue
Title: One More Chance (Epilogue)
Author: ica_90
Beta by: cherry_akira
Pairing: Ohmiya
Genre: Angst, Fluff
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: it makes me to consider a lot to buy their DVD today, so no, I don’t own them. Nothing was taken from this except for some writing satisfaction and releases my tension? Ohmiya own each other, hopefully
It scared him thinking how his decision now just created another wrong one, but worse.
Falling in love with Ohno was one of the biggest mistakes he ever made. He almost killed himself when Ohno had broken up with him, leaving him by himself to mend his own broken heart, which was futile.
Kidnapping and practically raping Ohno was another detestable deed. It cause him to stop believing of the word “love”, no matter how sincere Ohno was now.
The list of faults rolled down to the ultimatum: Abandoning Ohno as he begged for another chance. It almost cost him Ohno’s life as the man almost killed himself because of his own stupidity. Every single time Nino saw that scar on Ohno’s wrist, guilt surrounded him and suffocated him as his thought was messed up his mind.
But then…
What if he had done the unthinkable by giving Ohno another chance? What if those desperate, longing cries had just been fake for the sake of taking him back just to clean up the mess Ohno had made in the first place?
What if, even after the second chance he receives, Ohno had never loved him even the slightest? What if everything they had now was just something Ohno wanted to do to cleanse away his guilt?
What if the relationship was never meant to be in the first place?
It scared him.
Maybe Ohno had become attentive to him.
Maybe Ohno had shown how much he meant the world to him.
Maybe Ohno finally had realized his mistake.
Maybe Ohno had finally realized how much he means to him. Nino loved Ohno from the depths of his heart, that he believed the latter deserved the very best.
Maybe it is fate…or maybe it was not, like he thought.
But still…
He hate it.
He knew it was for the job. And he knew well how Jun would never betray his trust. But watching how close Ohno and Jun was, his insecurities started to surface and doubt flooding into his nerves and heart.
The way Ohno glanced at Jun, or the way Jun was laughing at the Ohno’s silly attitude. How Jun complimented Ohno’s smell was, or when Ohno told fans in their interview how glad he was to have Jun in the group. He couldn’t stop himself from shuddering in fear as he tried so hard to stop the stabbing pain in his heart.
However today, he reached his limits.
They were forming a group hug when Jun’s hand wrapped around Ohno’s shoulder, and Nino saw it. He froze. When they cheered for the concert’s success that day, Nino didn’t cheered along. Instead he stood there like a lifeless doll.
He felt pathetic; for feeling jealous over something so minor. He wished he wasn’t as possessive. He wished he would have a little trust on Ohno. But in the end, asking himself for a little trust was too much for him. He put his faith into Ohno once before, but he ruined it entirely. Even now, he couldn’t.
Hence, instead of joining the members and staffs for their end-of-concert party; he excused himself to his hotel room and ignored at least four pairs of eyes who were looked at him in concern.
He hated himself for being insecure. There was no denying it. And because of that, he thought that maybe he wasn’t the best for Ohno. Ohno deserved a proper happiness which he could not offer. Ohno deserved someone better. Someone who wasn’t as gloomy as him. Someone who wouldn’t have given him so much trouble. Someone who he can make him smile and laugh happily. Someone who he can love and trust and will get the same in return. Someone…normal.
Someone like Jun.
His hand was shook as he swiped his card at the door. The stabbing pain was all over his body as his thoughts tortured and replayed inside his head. It needed to stop. He needed sleep. Maybe he needed sleeping pills. But everything was too much for him to handle.
Almost the same time his strength weakened, he pushed the door opened, almost falling to the hard floor. But before his head managed to hit the hard floor, a hand wrapped around his waist, supporting him from falling.
“Oh-chan,” Nino called out the man’s name. A tear dropped on the man’s hand, who was supporting him standing. He heard the sound of the door being closed as Ohno carefully pushed him into the room; before he turned Nino around only to see how miserable Nino was at the moment.
His heart pounded so hard. From the tears on the man’s face, Ohno knew that Nino had been thinking of something hurtful, about him. It hurt him as well thinking about the things that had happened before that had caused the pain.
Yet, he couldn’t let the man out of his life again. Yet, despite how he know he was the reason to the man’s tears, he wanted to ask.
“What’s wrong, Kazu?” His hand shivered as he wiped away the man’s tears. He tried so hard to hide the anxiety in his voice he pressed on. “Why are you not joining the party?” He asked, caressing the man in his arms.
He tried to calm down the group’s leader, but failed. Nino tightened his embrace on him instead.
“Oh-chan,” Nino called him again in between his sobs after a while. “Oh-chan, maybe I’m not the one!”
“Hey, don’t-“
“I cannot trust you anymore!” Nino snapped and pushed Ohno away. “I cannot make you truly smile. I cannot give you happiness. I make trouble for you. I keep doubting you.”
“Kazu-“
“Maybe it is better for us to go our separate ways now. Maybe I was wrong when I said it is me who can love you more than anything. I was just selfish. Maybe you have made your decision right before when you chose Jun. Maybe Jun was the best for you,”
“Kazunari-“
“Just go to the party, Ohno-san. Just leave me alone. I’m fine, just leave-“
“STOP ASKING ME TO LEAVE YOU ALONE BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT FINE! I’M NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL YOU HEAR ME OUT, SO SHUT UP NOW!”
Ohno’s voice echoed in the room. Nino stopped. Slowly he turned around to take a look at the other man.
For years, they’ve been living together. Yes, Ohno had once lost his patience with him, so he rarely showed his anger. Therefore, when Nino saw how the man was shaking, his palms clenched so hard that his knuckles turned white; Nino knew how mad the man was now.
“Ohno-san-“
He had nothing in his mind to say anything else. But it wasn’t necessary. Ohno walked straight to him, both of his hand cupped Nino’s face before he brought the man into a kiss. A kiss that tried to tell Nino how much he wanted the man, how much he wanted all the insecurities to go away, and how much he wanted Nino to love him again.
And when the kiss broke, trails of tears were on Ohno’s face, which fell onto the floor. Ohno lowered his head, and his hand limp on Nino’s shoulder. He was shaking so hard as he was trying to control his tears.
“I don’t deserve your trust, Kazu,” he began, his voice cracking. His grip on Nino’s shoulder tightened to the point that it hurt, but Nino did not whine about it. “I deserve your doubt.”
He paused.
“You trusted me before, and I took you for granted. Hence I deserve to be doubted.”
“Oh-chan-“
“I hate it when you called me Ohno-san. It is if you’re pushing me away.”
“I-“
“Shhh…” Ohno put his finger on Nino’s lips, silencing him. “Let me finished, Kazu.”
He took one deep breathe before he started again.
“I wish that you would love me like before. When everything was about me. But I don’t deserve it, Kazu. I know it. But I really love you. I really do, so please don’t push me away. Even if you couldn’t love me anymore, please let me stay by your side. Because by doing that, that was the only way that I have to keep convincing you how much my world would be meaningless without you. Even if that would take my whole life to convince you how much I love you. So please, let me stay by your side because it is you who I need. It is you who I want to be with. Not with Jun. Not with anyone else.”
Nino fell silent.
“You do realize how I was thinking about everything because I want you to be happy right, Satoshi?” Nino asked. “Because I want you to be happy. I don’t want you to stay because I forced you to, but because I love you.”
“So, let us stay together. If we love each other, why do we need to end it?” Ohno asked, cupping Nino’s face with both hands. “There’s no world of happiness in my life if it isn’t with you, Kazu.”
Nino fell silent. Ohno didn’t say another word either.
“I’m sorry, Satoshi,” Nino whispered softly. All of the sudden all of his insecurities faded away, and replaced with rays of hope. “But please let me love you one more time.”
Ohno took him into his embrace.
“Let’s love each other until forever, Kazu,”
Nino nodded in the man’s embrace.
He wasn’t that sure if he could gain back the trust he had for the man.
But the next morning when he woke up from his slumber, only to feel the man’s breath on his face, his waist was wrapped by Ohno’s hand; Nino started to reconsider the odds.
He tested the possibilities once as he tried to pull away from the older man, only to be jerked back into a secure hold. Ohno’s nose pressed at the crook of his neck as he mumbled.
“Stay Kazu,”
Nino didn’t need to be told twice.
Maybe it’s time for him to finally give the man one more chance.
___________________________________________________________________
let me say something about this fic. it tortures me more than i could imagine. i never have in mind on making sequel to Maybe a goodbye but people was hoping so i tried and it's really torture me. hahaha. in a good way. maybe? XD
thanks everyone who had leave comment and read this. see ya next time. <3
Author: ica_90
Beta by: cherry_akira
Pairing: Ohmiya
Genre: Angst, Fluff
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: it makes me to consider a lot to buy their DVD today, so no, I don’t own them. Nothing was taken from this except for some writing satisfaction and releases my tension? Ohmiya own each other, hopefully
It scared him thinking how his decision now just created another wrong one, but worse.
Falling in love with Ohno was one of the biggest mistakes he ever made. He almost killed himself when Ohno had broken up with him, leaving him by himself to mend his own broken heart, which was futile.
Kidnapping and practically raping Ohno was another detestable deed. It cause him to stop believing of the word “love”, no matter how sincere Ohno was now.
The list of faults rolled down to the ultimatum: Abandoning Ohno as he begged for another chance. It almost cost him Ohno’s life as the man almost killed himself because of his own stupidity. Every single time Nino saw that scar on Ohno’s wrist, guilt surrounded him and suffocated him as his thought was messed up his mind.
But then…
What if he had done the unthinkable by giving Ohno another chance? What if those desperate, longing cries had just been fake for the sake of taking him back just to clean up the mess Ohno had made in the first place?
What if, even after the second chance he receives, Ohno had never loved him even the slightest? What if everything they had now was just something Ohno wanted to do to cleanse away his guilt?
What if the relationship was never meant to be in the first place?
It scared him.
Maybe Ohno had become attentive to him.
Maybe Ohno had shown how much he meant the world to him.
Maybe Ohno finally had realized his mistake.
Maybe Ohno had finally realized how much he means to him. Nino loved Ohno from the depths of his heart, that he believed the latter deserved the very best.
Maybe it is fate…or maybe it was not, like he thought.
But still…
He hate it.
He knew it was for the job. And he knew well how Jun would never betray his trust. But watching how close Ohno and Jun was, his insecurities started to surface and doubt flooding into his nerves and heart.
The way Ohno glanced at Jun, or the way Jun was laughing at the Ohno’s silly attitude. How Jun complimented Ohno’s smell was, or when Ohno told fans in their interview how glad he was to have Jun in the group. He couldn’t stop himself from shuddering in fear as he tried so hard to stop the stabbing pain in his heart.
However today, he reached his limits.
They were forming a group hug when Jun’s hand wrapped around Ohno’s shoulder, and Nino saw it. He froze. When they cheered for the concert’s success that day, Nino didn’t cheered along. Instead he stood there like a lifeless doll.
He felt pathetic; for feeling jealous over something so minor. He wished he wasn’t as possessive. He wished he would have a little trust on Ohno. But in the end, asking himself for a little trust was too much for him. He put his faith into Ohno once before, but he ruined it entirely. Even now, he couldn’t.
Hence, instead of joining the members and staffs for their end-of-concert party; he excused himself to his hotel room and ignored at least four pairs of eyes who were looked at him in concern.
He hated himself for being insecure. There was no denying it. And because of that, he thought that maybe he wasn’t the best for Ohno. Ohno deserved a proper happiness which he could not offer. Ohno deserved someone better. Someone who wasn’t as gloomy as him. Someone who wouldn’t have given him so much trouble. Someone who he can make him smile and laugh happily. Someone who he can love and trust and will get the same in return. Someone…normal.
Someone like Jun.
His hand was shook as he swiped his card at the door. The stabbing pain was all over his body as his thoughts tortured and replayed inside his head. It needed to stop. He needed sleep. Maybe he needed sleeping pills. But everything was too much for him to handle.
Almost the same time his strength weakened, he pushed the door opened, almost falling to the hard floor. But before his head managed to hit the hard floor, a hand wrapped around his waist, supporting him from falling.
“Oh-chan,” Nino called out the man’s name. A tear dropped on the man’s hand, who was supporting him standing. He heard the sound of the door being closed as Ohno carefully pushed him into the room; before he turned Nino around only to see how miserable Nino was at the moment.
His heart pounded so hard. From the tears on the man’s face, Ohno knew that Nino had been thinking of something hurtful, about him. It hurt him as well thinking about the things that had happened before that had caused the pain.
Yet, he couldn’t let the man out of his life again. Yet, despite how he know he was the reason to the man’s tears, he wanted to ask.
“What’s wrong, Kazu?” His hand shivered as he wiped away the man’s tears. He tried so hard to hide the anxiety in his voice he pressed on. “Why are you not joining the party?” He asked, caressing the man in his arms.
He tried to calm down the group’s leader, but failed. Nino tightened his embrace on him instead.
“Oh-chan,” Nino called him again in between his sobs after a while. “Oh-chan, maybe I’m not the one!”
“Hey, don’t-“
“I cannot trust you anymore!” Nino snapped and pushed Ohno away. “I cannot make you truly smile. I cannot give you happiness. I make trouble for you. I keep doubting you.”
“Kazu-“
“Maybe it is better for us to go our separate ways now. Maybe I was wrong when I said it is me who can love you more than anything. I was just selfish. Maybe you have made your decision right before when you chose Jun. Maybe Jun was the best for you,”
“Kazunari-“
“Just go to the party, Ohno-san. Just leave me alone. I’m fine, just leave-“
“STOP ASKING ME TO LEAVE YOU ALONE BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT FINE! I’M NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL YOU HEAR ME OUT, SO SHUT UP NOW!”
Ohno’s voice echoed in the room. Nino stopped. Slowly he turned around to take a look at the other man.
For years, they’ve been living together. Yes, Ohno had once lost his patience with him, so he rarely showed his anger. Therefore, when Nino saw how the man was shaking, his palms clenched so hard that his knuckles turned white; Nino knew how mad the man was now.
“Ohno-san-“
He had nothing in his mind to say anything else. But it wasn’t necessary. Ohno walked straight to him, both of his hand cupped Nino’s face before he brought the man into a kiss. A kiss that tried to tell Nino how much he wanted the man, how much he wanted all the insecurities to go away, and how much he wanted Nino to love him again.
And when the kiss broke, trails of tears were on Ohno’s face, which fell onto the floor. Ohno lowered his head, and his hand limp on Nino’s shoulder. He was shaking so hard as he was trying to control his tears.
“I don’t deserve your trust, Kazu,” he began, his voice cracking. His grip on Nino’s shoulder tightened to the point that it hurt, but Nino did not whine about it. “I deserve your doubt.”
He paused.
“You trusted me before, and I took you for granted. Hence I deserve to be doubted.”
“Oh-chan-“
“I hate it when you called me Ohno-san. It is if you’re pushing me away.”
“I-“
“Shhh…” Ohno put his finger on Nino’s lips, silencing him. “Let me finished, Kazu.”
He took one deep breathe before he started again.
“I wish that you would love me like before. When everything was about me. But I don’t deserve it, Kazu. I know it. But I really love you. I really do, so please don’t push me away. Even if you couldn’t love me anymore, please let me stay by your side. Because by doing that, that was the only way that I have to keep convincing you how much my world would be meaningless without you. Even if that would take my whole life to convince you how much I love you. So please, let me stay by your side because it is you who I need. It is you who I want to be with. Not with Jun. Not with anyone else.”
Nino fell silent.
“You do realize how I was thinking about everything because I want you to be happy right, Satoshi?” Nino asked. “Because I want you to be happy. I don’t want you to stay because I forced you to, but because I love you.”
“So, let us stay together. If we love each other, why do we need to end it?” Ohno asked, cupping Nino’s face with both hands. “There’s no world of happiness in my life if it isn’t with you, Kazu.”
Nino fell silent. Ohno didn’t say another word either.
“I’m sorry, Satoshi,” Nino whispered softly. All of the sudden all of his insecurities faded away, and replaced with rays of hope. “But please let me love you one more time.”
Ohno took him into his embrace.
“Let’s love each other until forever, Kazu,”
Nino nodded in the man’s embrace.
He wasn’t that sure if he could gain back the trust he had for the man.
But the next morning when he woke up from his slumber, only to feel the man’s breath on his face, his waist was wrapped by Ohno’s hand; Nino started to reconsider the odds.
He tested the possibilities once as he tried to pull away from the older man, only to be jerked back into a secure hold. Ohno’s nose pressed at the crook of his neck as he mumbled.
“Stay Kazu,”
Nino didn’t need to be told twice.
Maybe it’s time for him to finally give the man one more chance.
___________________________________________________________________
let me say something about this fic. it tortures me more than i could imagine. i never have in mind on making sequel to Maybe a goodbye but people was hoping so i tried and it's really torture me. hahaha. in a good way. maybe? XD
thanks everyone who had leave comment and read this. see ya next time. <3