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I want you all to know that I haven't abandoned "Come Down To Me". I've just had an idea for a fic and I wanted to run with it. I can write two fics, right? Yeah, sure I can. I say even though it takes me so long to update one. hahaha...
Ok, so this fic is slightly on the darker side of things you could say. I'm not 100% sure if it'll turn out exactly like I have it planned in my head, because basically things never turn out like the plan - but it could be better. It could also be a hell of a lot worse. lol.
I made a trailer for the fic - which may answer some questions - or create heaps more. But it's under the cut. I hope you guys enjoy it.
Click to viewRunning Back To You
Chapter One
“I’ll tell you why we ran away!” Sian shouted through her tears.
I couldn’t believe that she was actually about to tell her father everything. Well, not everything because certain details would probably kill the man, but Sian was about to tell her father the most important thing in the world.
“We’re in love, ok? Me and Sophie are in love.” There it was. The most important thing in the world.
“With each other.” I added softly. “We’re in love with each other and we’re a couple.”
I chanced a look at Sian. She looked as frightened as I felt. Neither of us had expected this to run smoothly, but the words that started to flow out of Vinnie’s mouth were harsher than either of us imagined.
Saying he was angry would’ve been an understatement. His eyes were filled with hatred and I knew that he meant all the words he was saying. I could see how much his words were hurting Sian, but she stood her ground. She insisted that it wasn’t just a phase. She told him that the way she loved me was very different to the way she loved Ryan.
“Shut your stupid mouth!”
“Don’t you dare speak to her like that!”
“Stay out of this, dyke!” He spat at me.
“Dad!” Sian shouted, and all I could do was drop my eyes from his.
“Right, that’s it. Get out!” Dad stepped between Vinnie and us.
“Fine! But this isn’t over.” Vinnie threw his hands into the air and stormed out.
I turned to Sian and my arms instinctively enveloped her. I wanted to do more than just hug her. I wanted to make her feel safe. I wanted to take away her pain, but she was a lot stronger than me. She breathed out and suddenly her tears stopped. She wrapped her arms tightly around me and told me it was going to be ok.
“It’s ok to cry now, Soph.” She whispered, and I finally let go.
I blinked away the tears as the memory slowly faded out like the final scene of an old black and white movie. It’s almost what my life had become at that point - a romantic roller coaster with so many ups and downs that by the end the need to throw up was just so overwhelming that there was no stopping it.
But that was then. That was when being in Sian’s arms was the only thing that made me feel loved and safe.
And this was now - when being safe meant locking all the windows and dead bolting the door. And being loved meant…well, I could tell you if I believed in it anymore.
I slowly pushed myself to my feet and walked to the window.
It was raining.
It was always raining.
I leaned my head against the cold glass and closed my eyes, letting the sound of falling rain fill my ears. And suddenly I wasn’t alone anymore.
“You’re not really here.” I sighed, refusing to open my eyes.
“But I am. Look at me.”
“No.”
“Soph,” Butterflies fluttered in my stomach at the sound of my name on her lips. My name that only she called me. “Look at me.”
I slowly shook my head, clamping my eyes tighter.
I could feel her move closer to me and suddenly I could smell her. Maybe she was real. Maybe this wasn’t like all the other times when I’d opened my eyes and she’d be gone. All the times when I realized that her voice was just a sound in my head.
“Sophie…”
I breathed in deep, so deep that I felt a little lightheaded. I slowly opened my eyes and suddenly all my breath was gone. My heart stopped beating, just like it did every time I saw her face. The hair on the back of my neck stood up, just like it did every time I looked into her ocean blue eyes.
“Don’t look so happy to see me.” Sian chuckled.
“You’re not real.” I whispered.
“I’m as real as you are.”
“No” I shook my head. I knew what I saw, I knew what my heart was trying to make me believe, but my head knew better. It knew what was real, and what wasn’t.
“If I wasn’t real, could I touch you?” I watched as she slowly lifted her hand to brush my cheek. I closed my eyes. It would’ve been impossible to put into words how I felt in that moment.
Still, my head knew better.
“You’re not - ”
“Stop saying that I’m not real!” Sian pulled her hand back and stepped away from me.
“Why are you here, Sian?” I sighed and slowly opened my eyes.
“You want me to be here.”
“I want you. All of you. The real you.”
“You have me.” She smiled and I almost died.
“No, I don’t, Sian.” I whispered.
And I didn’t. I was here. I was in my apartment with all the windows locked and the door dead bolted to keep all the scary things outside, and Sian was…Sian was a million worlds away.
“You could have me again, Soph.” She stepped closer to me. “All you have to do is come and find me.”
“I know where you are, Sian.”
“So come and get me.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?” I could hear the sadness in her voice now. It was the same sadness that I was feeling in my heart, in the pit of my stomach and in the place that knew better.
“You know why.”
“Well, I think it’s a stupid reason.” She grinned.
My eyes darted to the clock. It was almost that time again.
“It’s time, isn’t it?”
I nodded weakly because I couldn’t do anything else. I wanted this moment to last forever and I knew that if I said anything I would cry. My silence was my only defense.
“Well, maybe next time we can have more time.” She stepped up to me. She was only millimeters away and her scent filled my nostrils. “Maybe next time you won’t waste so much time thinking about the past.”
“I like thinking about the past.”
“Really? All of the past?”
“My past has you in it.” I shrugged. “I like thinking about you.”
“I like thinking about you, too. It’s the only thing that is keeping me going.” I watched her slowly lick her lips as she lowered her beautiful blue eyes to my lips. She smirked and locked her eyes with mine again.
She slowly leaned in; I closed my eyes and braced myself for the moment when her lips would touch mine. For the moment that my heart longed for, but my head knew better than to expect…
I shot upright in bed as my internal alarm went off. My heart was racing just like it always did after I dreamt about Sian. But that’s all it was.
A dream.
As my heartbeat slowed, I turned and looked at the girl who was sleeping beside me. Her blonde hair had fallen and covered part of her face but I could see how peaceful she looked. She must’ve been having a nice dream.
I wondered for a moment if the dream was about me. Mine were never about her, or any of them for that matter. Mine were always about Sian. About the one girl who, unlike the one who slept beside, held onto my heart and not my body.
I slowly stood and looked for my clothes. I was careful not to make a sound as I pulled my shirt over my head.
I watched her sleep as I slid my jeans on, followed by my boots.
I looked at my watch, Sian had been right, it was time. It was time for me to start my daily routine. It was time for me to slip out while the girl still slept.
I never stayed. Never.
I slowly made my way through her apartment and silently slipped out the front door.
I turned my face up and let the rain wash away what I just done. I felt dirty. I always felt dirty. Afterwards.
I wanted to stop. I really did. I didn’t like going to bars on the hunt for anyone to make me feel a little better. I knew that I was hurting them, but it paled in comparison to the pain I felt.
Besides, it was never about them.
It was always about my dream. I could only dream after a long night of ‘working out’. But I told myself that I needed to stop. I really did.
Ashleigh was the last one. It was Ashleigh wasn’t it?
Ahhh, who cares? She was the last one. Even if it meant that I couldn’t dream anymore. My heart sunk a little lower because I knew that it meant I wouldn’t see Sian again.
I pushed my hands deep into my pockets and headed down the street. The rain stopped, and it made me smile because I knew that things were really about to change.
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No idea why the spacing is all crappy...I've posted this about four times and I can't work out why. Hmmm...oh well, makes it seem longer, lol. Comments are love guys. Let me know if I should continue.