Wow!
God I don't know what to say...you all are so special in your own way and I appreciate everything you've said. I feel kinda bad now because I feel if I back out then I got you all feeling sad for nothing, but I know thats a childish way of thinking about it. After talking with Andrew's mom it really got me thinking about things. No one had talked to me in that way about it at all, not even my mom, so I listened. I still mean every single thing I said about all of you and I will never back away from how I feel about you all. I seriously have to rethink some of this now and see what I can do, I don't want to leave if I don't have to and I really want to move back down near this area if anything.
My whole life and all the crazy, fun, best experiences I have had have been here...with all of you. I don't want to lose that and if I don't want to then why the hell would I think of doing something that would take me far away? I don't understand it completely so I can't tell you exactly, some of you know the reasons that drove me to think about doing this in the first place. You have all helped me change, grow, learn in the past two years I lived out here, more so then I would have ever changed if I never did move out here. That's why I miss you all so much, I don't want to lose the people who have helped to make my life better in every way possible. I hope I am there for all of you in the way you need me to be. I care about all of you, I would do anything for you guys! I just want things to work out and balance out for a change on my end. When that will happen, hell if I know, but it just has to balance out. It has done so for some of you when you were going through some downs and now going through some ups (lol UPS). Whatever I decide to do, never forget that I love every single one of you and that I would not trade any of you for anything in the world. You are all so unique in your own way and that is why I love you all the way you are. <3
My whole life and all the crazy, fun, best experiences I have had have been here...with all of you. I don't want to lose that and if I don't want to then why the hell would I think of doing something that would take me far away? I don't understand it completely so I can't tell you exactly, some of you know the reasons that drove me to think about doing this in the first place. You have all helped me change, grow, learn in the past two years I lived out here, more so then I would have ever changed if I never did move out here. That's why I miss you all so much, I don't want to lose the people who have helped to make my life better in every way possible. I hope I am there for all of you in the way you need me to be. I care about all of you, I would do anything for you guys! I just want things to work out and balance out for a change on my end. When that will happen, hell if I know, but it just has to balance out. It has done so for some of you when you were going through some downs and now going through some ups (lol UPS). Whatever I decide to do, never forget that I love every single one of you and that I would not trade any of you for anything in the world. You are all so unique in your own way and that is why I love you all the way you are. <3