A "Red Eulogy" sorta
some people would like to call such behaviour pathetic
some people would like to term such behaviour self-destructive
I on the other hand prefer the terminology "self-destructive pathetic" behaviour
hey, i already warned at the begining of the month that this period brings out the worst of me concerning death
huh, Murphy's law seemed to have jinxed that pretty well
ok, was not a suicide this time, but is still pretty fucked
Neil just emailed me last week about my dissertation, his first communication in months
I didn't like his reply so I did not reply
I actually spent most of the morning thinking of him, trying to think of a clever and snoty but diplomatic reply to him
In fact, yes I spent most of the morning having bad thoughts concerning Comrade Rafeek
Now I feel like a shit, now he is dead, and now I am sitting here pounding 40's since like 4:30 pm
Called my advisor today to tell him about Neil, and was very obviously choked up on the phone
We talked for 15 minutes: 1.5 minutes about Neil, and the 13.5 minutes of Jim talking about trying to index his latest book
Stopped by the dpt to talk to our dpt chair about the process on switching committee members, you know since Neil is dead and all
Saw a collegue in the hall who said "Why you lookin so glum" so I said "I just found out a close friend died"
They replied, "Oh" and walked away
Had some good chats online, has some nice comments online, and Colleen also came over for a bit so not all is shit
Well no, Neil is dead and I'm too poor to go to his funeral, so yes all is shit
Hey, I already warned this post was going to be reflective of "self-destructive pathetic" behaviour so if u r reading, deal I guess
Off to finish drinking 40 #4 and to listen to more Bright Eyes
Yeah as I said before, I don't typically deal well with death in April
Neil was a true comrade with equal dedication to his profession and his class
His comradery will be dearly missed, rest in peace dear Comrade Rafeek
some people would like to term such behaviour self-destructive
I on the other hand prefer the terminology "self-destructive pathetic" behaviour
hey, i already warned at the begining of the month that this period brings out the worst of me concerning death
huh, Murphy's law seemed to have jinxed that pretty well
ok, was not a suicide this time, but is still pretty fucked
Neil just emailed me last week about my dissertation, his first communication in months
I didn't like his reply so I did not reply
I actually spent most of the morning thinking of him, trying to think of a clever and snoty but diplomatic reply to him
In fact, yes I spent most of the morning having bad thoughts concerning Comrade Rafeek
Now I feel like a shit, now he is dead, and now I am sitting here pounding 40's since like 4:30 pm
Called my advisor today to tell him about Neil, and was very obviously choked up on the phone
We talked for 15 minutes: 1.5 minutes about Neil, and the 13.5 minutes of Jim talking about trying to index his latest book
Stopped by the dpt to talk to our dpt chair about the process on switching committee members, you know since Neil is dead and all
Saw a collegue in the hall who said "Why you lookin so glum" so I said "I just found out a close friend died"
They replied, "Oh" and walked away
Had some good chats online, has some nice comments online, and Colleen also came over for a bit so not all is shit
Well no, Neil is dead and I'm too poor to go to his funeral, so yes all is shit
Hey, I already warned this post was going to be reflective of "self-destructive pathetic" behaviour so if u r reading, deal I guess
Off to finish drinking 40 #4 and to listen to more Bright Eyes
Yeah as I said before, I don't typically deal well with death in April
Neil was a true comrade with equal dedication to his profession and his class
His comradery will be dearly missed, rest in peace dear Comrade Rafeek