Home again home again
I'm back at home for a few days again. And *gasp*, I'm actually blogging from home. Aren't you lucky! I'm feeling a bit meh right now so I apoligise if this is not the most interesting of posts. Let's see what we get.
I got home yesterday around dinnertime. I've been hanging with the parents, something that's always fun to do. Mom was supposed to have the day off today to run around and do wedding things with me but she got offered another shift and since she's been off several weeks from a really bad cold, she decided to take it. That means I didn't do a whole lot of wedding stuff today.
I think I'm a little bummed about the whole wedding project in general right now. Don't get me wrong, I'm still really really excited and I can't wait for it to be here, but the planning has become a little tedious. Last night I was watching several wedding shows on Life Network about weddings, including Bridezillas, which is never a good idea if you're in fact a bride-to-be yourself. It gives you too many ideas about what could go wrong. That's all they show on these shows, what goes wrong. That's what makes it tv. And these girls were freaking out, or acting so horribly you wonder who on earth would marry them in the first place. I think I've been doing an okay job of not getting like that. Please God don't let me be a Bridezilla!
Then also there's the fact that JF is in the last few weeks of his university life. He is stressing about his thesis and his exams and everything else. This means I'm also stressing about his exams and thesis and everything else, plus the wedding. I know he's totally overwhelmed and I can't talk to him about anything wedding or marriage related because he has to focus on what he's doing and get through it. I get that, I support that. But it's friggin killing me that I have all these details to share and I can't talk about them, and all these ideas I want his opinion on and I can't have them. And nevermind asking him to do anything, that's completely out of the question right now. Is it so much to ask, universe, to get to share my wedding excitement with my husband-to-be? I know that boys don't care about flowers. I understand. I've been doing all the planning because we agreed that he has to graduate and I have to plan the wedding. I guess I'm whining right now more because I miss HIM more than anything else, and I don't know how else to express it. I can't wait for him to graduate so I can have my JF back!
Is all this too personal? I just read it over and I guess it's not. I just hate the university experience sometimes, I think everyone who has been in university at one point or another is just fed up and wants it to be over with. I know that JF is there right now, and there's nothing I can do about it except tell him it's going to be okay, and that there's a light at the end of the tunnel. I know I couldn't see it during my last fews weeks, I know I can't make him see it, but what else can I do?
So tomorrow I'm going to go order my flowers and I hope they will turn out beautiful because I have no skill with flowers at all. I am going to try to be really productive this trip home. At the very least it's distracting me from thinking about teacher's college stuff, as the replies come back on Monday (well, I can check online on Monday, eep). Okay, I have to go watch tv, I'm thinking too much. But no wedding shows!
I got home yesterday around dinnertime. I've been hanging with the parents, something that's always fun to do. Mom was supposed to have the day off today to run around and do wedding things with me but she got offered another shift and since she's been off several weeks from a really bad cold, she decided to take it. That means I didn't do a whole lot of wedding stuff today.
I think I'm a little bummed about the whole wedding project in general right now. Don't get me wrong, I'm still really really excited and I can't wait for it to be here, but the planning has become a little tedious. Last night I was watching several wedding shows on Life Network about weddings, including Bridezillas, which is never a good idea if you're in fact a bride-to-be yourself. It gives you too many ideas about what could go wrong. That's all they show on these shows, what goes wrong. That's what makes it tv. And these girls were freaking out, or acting so horribly you wonder who on earth would marry them in the first place. I think I've been doing an okay job of not getting like that. Please God don't let me be a Bridezilla!
Then also there's the fact that JF is in the last few weeks of his university life. He is stressing about his thesis and his exams and everything else. This means I'm also stressing about his exams and thesis and everything else, plus the wedding. I know he's totally overwhelmed and I can't talk to him about anything wedding or marriage related because he has to focus on what he's doing and get through it. I get that, I support that. But it's friggin killing me that I have all these details to share and I can't talk about them, and all these ideas I want his opinion on and I can't have them. And nevermind asking him to do anything, that's completely out of the question right now. Is it so much to ask, universe, to get to share my wedding excitement with my husband-to-be? I know that boys don't care about flowers. I understand. I've been doing all the planning because we agreed that he has to graduate and I have to plan the wedding. I guess I'm whining right now more because I miss HIM more than anything else, and I don't know how else to express it. I can't wait for him to graduate so I can have my JF back!
Is all this too personal? I just read it over and I guess it's not. I just hate the university experience sometimes, I think everyone who has been in university at one point or another is just fed up and wants it to be over with. I know that JF is there right now, and there's nothing I can do about it except tell him it's going to be okay, and that there's a light at the end of the tunnel. I know I couldn't see it during my last fews weeks, I know I can't make him see it, but what else can I do?
So tomorrow I'm going to go order my flowers and I hope they will turn out beautiful because I have no skill with flowers at all. I am going to try to be really productive this trip home. At the very least it's distracting me from thinking about teacher's college stuff, as the replies come back on Monday (well, I can check online on Monday, eep). Okay, I have to go watch tv, I'm thinking too much. But no wedding shows!