365 Facts: #100 (Medical--Nose)
Wow! I've hit #100! Anyway.
While I've only officially broken my thumb, I don't doubt that I've also broken my nose...possibly twice. I also broke a pair of glasses in the process.
The first time it happened, well, blame Mary Lou Retton. Really. See, I was in third grade, and this wasn't long after the '84 Olympics. I fancied myself a gymnast. I should have been one, but that's water under the bridge. Anyway, I had an old-style closet with a metal rod that seemed just perfect to practice a bar routine on...never mind that it wasn't strong enough to hold the weight of an eight-year-old, her clothes, and her mother's dry-clean-only outfits that wouldn't fit in her own closet. CRASH! And they all came tumbling down...right on top of my nose. Actually, first the rod hit my Annie glasses, cracking them in half, and then my nose. Unfortunately, I managed to do that while my father was home, so he came running and discovered what had happened. Yeah, there's really no hiding that you've completely destroyed your closet. While it hurt, I don't think there appeared to be anything seriously wrong. I'm not sure I even bled, though I did get a lot of bloody noses that year (entirely unsure if they're related or if they came before or after the incident). The vain person in me was worried about my glasses. It may have been up until that point that I'd had the exact same pair of glasses since I'd first gotten them over two years earlier. Now, they had this nice crack right down the middle. Dad glued them back together, but he put tape around the bridge to help the glue hold. Revenge of the Nerds had also come out not long before then, so of course that's what I thought of--I looked like a nerd. Great. Because my reputation really precluded that.
The second time, I was in late high school/early college. We have this grandfather's clock that actually did belong to my grandfather, my dad's dad, which we got when he died. In our old house, it was on the wall at the top of the stairs next to the bathroom. Out here, it was...wait for it...on the wall at the top of the stairs next to the bathroom. But at least now it wasn't actually on the stairs (remember: our old house was tiny); it was actually part of the foyer. I'd always thought that the clock was broken or otherwise didn't work. However, after we moved, dad got it going again. It has these weights that help keep the time, so you have to pull on them periodically to keep the clock going. One afternoon I decided to be clever and pull both weights at the same time. This succeeded in pulling the clock off the wall and onto my nose. Luckily, this time I did not break my glasses. Also, my father was in the adjacent room (computer room...where I am now, actually), so he came running. Realize the sound the clock made was spectacular, all chime-y and boing-y and crash-y. It's not even that big a clock. (It's not in a casing or anything--just a box with weights hanging from it.) Again, it hurt, but I don't think I bled or anything. I think, after that, we stopped using the clock for its intended purpose and just left it as a decorative piece on the wall. This didn't bother my mom, because the late-night every-hour and every-half-hour chiming kept her awake...though it took us a while to get used to the house being quiet.
Because of where I got hit, the part of my nose that got affected is hidden under the bridge of my glasses. You really can't tell anything's wrong unless I take my glasses off. Even then, it's not super noticeable. From the front, the bridge of my nose is a little flatter. From the left, I don't think you can notice anything. From the right, you can see a slight bump. It's nothing bad--one of those little character things people sometimes have, like a mole or a scar. But I have learned not to hang on a closet rod, no matter how tempting, and to never pull on both weights of a clock at once. Both are bad, mmmkay?
While I've only officially broken my thumb, I don't doubt that I've also broken my nose...possibly twice. I also broke a pair of glasses in the process.
The first time it happened, well, blame Mary Lou Retton. Really. See, I was in third grade, and this wasn't long after the '84 Olympics. I fancied myself a gymnast. I should have been one, but that's water under the bridge. Anyway, I had an old-style closet with a metal rod that seemed just perfect to practice a bar routine on...never mind that it wasn't strong enough to hold the weight of an eight-year-old, her clothes, and her mother's dry-clean-only outfits that wouldn't fit in her own closet. CRASH! And they all came tumbling down...right on top of my nose. Actually, first the rod hit my Annie glasses, cracking them in half, and then my nose. Unfortunately, I managed to do that while my father was home, so he came running and discovered what had happened. Yeah, there's really no hiding that you've completely destroyed your closet. While it hurt, I don't think there appeared to be anything seriously wrong. I'm not sure I even bled, though I did get a lot of bloody noses that year (entirely unsure if they're related or if they came before or after the incident). The vain person in me was worried about my glasses. It may have been up until that point that I'd had the exact same pair of glasses since I'd first gotten them over two years earlier. Now, they had this nice crack right down the middle. Dad glued them back together, but he put tape around the bridge to help the glue hold. Revenge of the Nerds had also come out not long before then, so of course that's what I thought of--I looked like a nerd. Great. Because my reputation really precluded that.
The second time, I was in late high school/early college. We have this grandfather's clock that actually did belong to my grandfather, my dad's dad, which we got when he died. In our old house, it was on the wall at the top of the stairs next to the bathroom. Out here, it was...wait for it...on the wall at the top of the stairs next to the bathroom. But at least now it wasn't actually on the stairs (remember: our old house was tiny); it was actually part of the foyer. I'd always thought that the clock was broken or otherwise didn't work. However, after we moved, dad got it going again. It has these weights that help keep the time, so you have to pull on them periodically to keep the clock going. One afternoon I decided to be clever and pull both weights at the same time. This succeeded in pulling the clock off the wall and onto my nose. Luckily, this time I did not break my glasses. Also, my father was in the adjacent room (computer room...where I am now, actually), so he came running. Realize the sound the clock made was spectacular, all chime-y and boing-y and crash-y. It's not even that big a clock. (It's not in a casing or anything--just a box with weights hanging from it.) Again, it hurt, but I don't think I bled or anything. I think, after that, we stopped using the clock for its intended purpose and just left it as a decorative piece on the wall. This didn't bother my mom, because the late-night every-hour and every-half-hour chiming kept her awake...though it took us a while to get used to the house being quiet.
Because of where I got hit, the part of my nose that got affected is hidden under the bridge of my glasses. You really can't tell anything's wrong unless I take my glasses off. Even then, it's not super noticeable. From the front, the bridge of my nose is a little flatter. From the left, I don't think you can notice anything. From the right, you can see a slight bump. It's nothing bad--one of those little character things people sometimes have, like a mole or a scar. But I have learned not to hang on a closet rod, no matter how tempting, and to never pull on both weights of a clock at once. Both are bad, mmmkay?