Reason #428 as to why I should move out and other insanity
There's this new book out: You: On a Diet.
When I first saw it at work, I thought it was You: On a *Date*. Heh, heh...whoops.
(I thought, boy, those doctors sure are branching out!)
So then I catch my mother watching a tape of the Oprah show on which this book was featured, and I tell her this mini-story, and she says she's taking notes on the show. Apparently there are four things a person needs in which to live: Food, water, sex, and sleep.
Mom then says, "I know which one *you're* missing."
After a split-second of shock and horror, I replied, "Yeah...sleep."
(NO COMMENTS FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY. My mother was bad enough.)
Then came work. A., my craziest coworker EVER, worked today and got in early so she could spend all day in the kiosk. That meant Pa. was upstairs with me all day. This is not a bad thing. It's been four weeks since I've worked upstairs with a coworker. I forget how amusing that can be...especially when the Bears lose, and said coworker then is inspired to write vulgar poetry about the loss. He was basing it off of The Cat in the Hat. Oh, wait, what's that I hear? That's right, it's Dr. Seuss spinning in his grave. After work (or "work," in the case of Pa. ...though really, he was only bad after his lunch break), the three of us went in the back room to clock out, and I discovered a Walter the Farting Dog toy on a shelf. Commence Rex Grossman impressions. Yes, we were playing football with a toy dog. That farts. A. ended up collapsed on the floor laughing at one point. Wow. And to think Pa. missed out on this fun last year because A. wasn't here. Oh, he is seeing the light. And lots of hugs. A. doles them out like nothing.
When I first saw it at work, I thought it was You: On a *Date*. Heh, heh...whoops.
(I thought, boy, those doctors sure are branching out!)
So then I catch my mother watching a tape of the Oprah show on which this book was featured, and I tell her this mini-story, and she says she's taking notes on the show. Apparently there are four things a person needs in which to live: Food, water, sex, and sleep.
Mom then says, "I know which one *you're* missing."
After a split-second of shock and horror, I replied, "Yeah...sleep."
(NO COMMENTS FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY. My mother was bad enough.)
Then came work. A., my craziest coworker EVER, worked today and got in early so she could spend all day in the kiosk. That meant Pa. was upstairs with me all day. This is not a bad thing. It's been four weeks since I've worked upstairs with a coworker. I forget how amusing that can be...especially when the Bears lose, and said coworker then is inspired to write vulgar poetry about the loss. He was basing it off of The Cat in the Hat. Oh, wait, what's that I hear? That's right, it's Dr. Seuss spinning in his grave. After work (or "work," in the case of Pa. ...though really, he was only bad after his lunch break), the three of us went in the back room to clock out, and I discovered a Walter the Farting Dog toy on a shelf. Commence Rex Grossman impressions. Yes, we were playing football with a toy dog. That farts. A. ended up collapsed on the floor laughing at one point. Wow. And to think Pa. missed out on this fun last year because A. wasn't here. Oh, he is seeing the light. And lots of hugs. A. doles them out like nothing.